Ah, the sweet sounds of summer. Managers chirping. The pop of the bats as they wake from their early spring hibernation. Hitters all going down with soft tissue injuries. Pitchers breaking down with overuse injuries. And of course, Rob Manfred trying to fix something nobody wanted fixed while ignoring the plight of minor leaguers sleeping in their Geo Metros.

Everything just as I remember it from 2019.

As we approach the summer months we’ll undoubtedly start to see some players break out of their early-season funk. Players finding their rhythm, returning from injury, and hitting flyballs into the hot summer air. We will also begin to see who is for real and who is pretending. To start off our hot bat summer, here are a few names that I have noticed around the league.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As I laid on the hospital bed recovering from my very painful bout with back spasms, I had a revelation. Maybe it was the morphine. Maybe it was the 4 nights in a row with less than an hour of sleep; or, perhaps it was my conscience and thoughts of my own mortality. Who knows. But I saw a vision of Jocko Willink before me. He challenged me to take full ownership of my life and own all my wins and all my losses. Especially the losses. Nothing is someone else’s fault. Nothing is chance, nothing is variance.

I am responsible for all my takes, and all my taeks. Whether they are good or bad… I am responsible. I am a capable person that can tilt the scale; if I fail, I need to learn from it and better myself. If I succeed, I need to learn from it and replicate it. I have no idea if anyone else in the biz does a post like this where they intentionally point out everything haha, but I’m going to give it a try and start now. Here. we. go.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We are 2 months into the season now (when the 2020 season ended, crazy huh?). Is it bad that the majority of success right now can be weighed by how many of your guys are on the IL? Oof. The other working title was “Doom Over My Hammy Edition” but that was just ridiculous. This week’s episode has become basically a spin-off of JKJ’s weekly bit, Ambulance Chasers. whew. That’s not so much an ambulance whew whew, as it is a sarcastic celebratory whew. Although… why not both? So as I said, we’re 2 months into this season now which puts us at roughly the 1/3 mark. Therefore, I have now made some adjustments to projected values reflecting this very truth. And that’s right, you guessed it. Adolis Garcia is rocketing up the charts like his batted balls to the heavens. I don’t have him in enough places and that makes me sad. Oof. Oh, and spoiler alert, Mike Trout is injured now… giant OOF. So many Oofs and so little time. But first, a word on the god-man Shohei Ohtani…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Change is the one constant in the world. You can’t escape it. You can’t deny it. You just have to accept it. We end up in places expecting things to go a certain way with our own laid-out plans that will succeed. But that doesn’t always happen right? Life doesn’t follow a script. We are continuously thrust into a new environment with a new set of rules and presented with a choice. A call to action. Adapt or die. This young man you will hear about today answered the call.

So there I sat in my office on a wet and rainy May morning. The hum of the fan overhead was a siren’s call of missed sleep the night before beckoning me to steal rest from the jaws of the new day. *Ping* The phone buzzed thus piercing the calm and my sleep-deprived ears. It was Grey in my DM with a request. When the bossman pings you to say he mentioned you by name in his morning write-up… It’s kinda a big deal. He didn’t earn his fantasy baseball degree from the University of Phoenix, but on the mean streets of Jersey trusting his primal instincts. He’s either got a really good hunch on the player or he’s really curious about what’s going on. This would be one of the former. Adbert Alzolay is pitching like a new man this season, and the early results are promising. He’s still so young, and still largely untested, but there’s something about Alzolay that makes you want to say “yay.”

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Here we are again fam. Last time I gave you an update we shuffled the board quite a bit to give due recognition to guys who were showing up and shaming the ones who aren’t. For instance, Adolis Garcia is still raking. That man has got power for days, he might break the top 40 next time we meet. Baddoo has continued to trend down with his average dropping below .200 for a bit, though he’s had a few signs of life over the past few days. He probably needs some time at AAA to continue his development as he fell a lot harder than I would have guessed. But it’s still early and he’s likely to be very hot/cold.

This week, I want to focus on a few more guys making a name for themselves in the “outfield”. And especially highlight one named Jared Walsh. As an Angels fan I have a lot of say on this, Pujols had to go. I knew it, you knew it, we all knew it. We all would have complained for the rest of the season that the Angels weren’t playing the young talent just like we do daily with the Rockies while Pujols struggled to hit over .230 (Jared is currently over .300). Jared is not a RF, he belongs at 1B where he’s a plus glove. Ohtani needs all the ABs at DH he can possibly get (speaking of him, is he going to get RF eligibility too? hahaha. He’s already subbed out there twice). These guys are the team’s future and they need to be on the field… Pujols was taking ABs away from their development and the time was now to let them fly. Anyway… let’s hit that run down:

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So I was sitting there on my porch drinking coffee this weekend thinking about a dream I had. In said dream, I was sitting at a small streetside cafe in Morroco, also drinking coffee. It’s a beautiful spring morning and the local street vendors are cooking the morning grub. The tasty aroma hangs like a cloud over the bazaar. I’m sitting there contemplating starting pitchers and who might be a surprise this season no one is talking about. Someone without a lot of flash that’s easy to spot, but low-key doing something different that doesn’t completely show up on the stat sheet. And while I’m staring at the clouds (debating this most serious of missions), a little Morrocan girl runs up to me carrying a bright turquoise bag and empties the contents on my lap.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Last week I gave you the NyQuil & Naquin Update. We looked at some hot starters and some early snoozers. So I sat here pondering what I should do about the season so far. After all, we aren’t even a month in yet. Do I stick to my guns, make marginal changes to the board and keep telling people it’s early (which is true) or do I take a leap for faith and dive into the rabbit hole, “what if some of these wild things going on actually mean something, and if everyone is mad, are we all mad? or are those that still haven’t lost their minds the mad ones since it hasn’t driven them mad as of yet?” We ask the tough questions here at Razzball.

You will see things that might frighten you, but don’t be alarmed. These are just the ravings of a madman who dared to ask “what if?” What if Byron Buxton is stayed healthy (he probably won’t), Mitch Haniger stayed healthy (he probably could), Franmil finally broke out for real (maybe so), and Mark Canha was a top tier leadoff man (feels like it). And who the hell is Adolis Garcia and why is he not on your roster yet? These questions and more I shall pursue.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Coolwhip is writing about a Pirate (again)??? I know. As much as I/we make fun of them, somehow they keep showing up. The first article I ever wrote here at Razzball was on Josh Bell. I also have written about Bryan Reynolds. And now, we could be seeing the subtle breakout of Colin Moran. He’s become a bit of a forgotten man over the years. Nowadays, his name doesn’t carry much weight on draft day. And aside from a hot run last year he doesn’t inspire much after either. I get it, he’s been about as yawnstipating as they come. But, did you know he used to be a thing?

Back in 2013, he was the 6th overall pick in the draft by the Marlins. Around him, Kris Bryant was taken 2nd overall while other notables came later like Tim Anderson (17th), Aaron Judge (32nd), and Cody Bellinger (124th). Big things were expected of him that hadn’t materialized. His prospect card reads as 50+ tools across the board on offense minus speed. Well, 2014 the Marlins made a trade: they sent 3B Colin Moran along with OF Jake Marisnick, P Francis Martes (who?), and a 2015 compensation pick to the Astros for SP Jarred Cosart (he was relevant for a second), SS Enrique (Kiké) Hernandez, and OF Austin Wates (who?). There were rumors that Moran was under consideration as the Astros’ first overall selection in 2013 (Mark Appel, that sure didn’t pan out huh?) and so they still got their guy. Though he didn’t exactly light up High-A that year (.294/.342/.393).

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Welcome back, Razz faithful. We have the first week plus in the books. And of course, there’s a LOT to talk about and a lot to overreact to… as well as gloss over. Yes, all the things. There is nothing quite like the drug that is April baseball. I call this the NyQuil and Naquin update because there are many well-known and well-thought-of bats that are still asleep *glares at Lourdes Gurriel Jr. on my bench* and other lesser-known bats starting the season loudly, like Tyler Naquin (Raise your hand if you saw that coming. No you didn’t, put it down!). So rather than freak out let’s relax like Frankie. Pull up a chair, breathe, and take a dose of the no-playtime, slow-start, whiffing, choking, groundout, hit-into-double-play, bad BABIP, so you can roster medicine.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

There’s really only one thing I can lead in with this (Coolwhip is about to stan). I like fun. Winning is fun but tastes so much better when it’s not boring. And if there’s one player in the league that embodies that, it’s Shohei Ohtani. There hasn’t been a legitimate two-way player in baseball since George Herman Ruth. Some players like Rick Ankiel in the past and current teammate Jared Walsh have started as a pitcher and ended up as a position player, but no one has been able to succeed on both sides of the ball over a full season. This, though, could finally be the season that we get to see it in all its glory.

The man carved out of marble on Mt. Olympus has descended to this mortal plane once more and now has a full bill of health. Since coming to the states he has yet to enter a season and play through it completely healthy. Elbow injury? Healed and ready to rock with full velocity this spring. Knee injury? Also healed up, and his power stroke is already on display with 2 HRs in his first 5 games after hitting 5 oppo taco home runs during spring training.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So it’s the last of the last week of Spring Training, what could possibly go wrong? This weekend of a slew of injuries and demotions went down across the league. And perhaps hit hardest was the outfield. It wasn’t just a middling outfielder or lower-tier guy that was struck down, but Superman himself Eloy Jimenez in one of the premier offenses for this season, and World Series hopeful White Sox, whose massive chest was torn asunder while trying to fly. The shining white knight became as Icarus with his wings burnt up for flying too close to the sun (or wall in this case). The folly of man triumphs over his dreams once again, no? The sweet lullaby of babies rocking ends with a tumble from the heights of Mt. Olympus to the pit of Hades. On that happy note, hopefully, this report doesn’t find you circling the drain in the Well of Souls… let’s begin!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

So a common theme this draft season at Razzball is “ADP is a trap.” In fact, I’m gonna lobby for t-shirts and mugs to commemorate. Mi amigo Blair dropped a bomb Monday that turns the idea of drafting pitchers in the 1st or 2nd round on its head, which I’m proud to say I had a part in, and needless to say, it is a form of scientific validation (logos) for the ethos that has been the mantra of Grey here since the great Razzball awakening. You don’t have to draft a pitcher in the first two rounds just because someone that setup the draft platform says you should. It’s the power of suggestion, groupthink, or even FOMO that compels you. If you haven’t read it yet, you should. After this article of course. It’s the 95 theses nailed to the church door of the fantasy baseball establishment.

You need to look at it like negotiations. When you want to make a good deal in your favor, you have got to set the initial parameters to negotiate from. You plant the flag at your starting point so every point conceded or won becomes a function of that starting point. When you are in a platform’s draft lobby, all draft values begin at the starting point of somebody else’s rankings. When you get picks at an ADP value or premium, what is that based on? True value? Your value? or THEIR value? Don’t get pulled into the game of taking someone at a certain cost just because of the number presented before their name and where they sit in the queue. Stop it. You’re getting caught up. What you can do though, is use it to your advantage and capitalize on the sheeple in your draft conforming to the system.

That was a super-long intro to talk about Patrick Corbin, but here we are. Welcome to the desert of the real. Patrick Corbin, along with some others I’ve highlighted this spring, represents a disconnect. What to do with ADPs and not fall into traps? Many of these rankings are overcompensating for what happened in the 2020 hellscape and under-compensating for track records. Years of experience are thrown out for what happened in a 60-game sample, and not even a normal sample but a mutated and grotesque shortened season, where the data sample was tainted. The same routine and environment that players usually go through to start the season was non-existent, so how can you relate it to what has happened before when there’s no constant for comparison.

Please, blog, may I have some more?