Padres starters give me the feels; Mariners starters start the underneath tinglings; Dodgers starters feather enthusiasm on the undercarriage. Reds starters? That park is so blech. Luis Castillo’s sexy, but, again, that park and…I trail off, thinking about whatever happened to Better Call Saul, did that show end? When my thoughts drift back, I remember what I was thinking about, and see Tyler Mahle. More like Tyler Mehle was my thought. Now? After watching him dismantle the Cubs? Color me intrigued, with a red paintbrush. Yesterday, Mahle went 6 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 2 walks, 7 Ks. He looked shaky as all get out to start the game — walked Happ, Bryant lined out hard, hit Rizzo, then he said, “Good morning, good afternoon, and–Well, I already have two outs, so I’ll have to say good night in the next inning.” And he did. He settled down after that, and no one looked close to starting a rally. He had a bit of luck at one point by getting to face the opposing Tyler after giving up a triple to Baez, but Mahle didn’t exude a whole lot of sweat beads otherwise. I’ve seen more sweat on a girl doing a Tyler Chatwood, which is a euphemism for tying a cherry stem into a knot with your mouth while seamlessly carrying on a conversation. I grabbed Mahle in one league for his next start vs. the Pirates, and plan on going one start at a time for now, but I’m encouraged. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Michael Saunders
FantasyDraft: The C & C K’ing Factory
September 11, 2017 | DFS, FantasyDraft | 9 Commentsby: Teddy Heater
Carlos Carrasco, $25,500 and the red hot Cleveland Indians are hosting the team formally known as the Detroit Tigers. If you haven’t been keeping track the current Tigers aren’t posting a fearsome lineup by any means. Nick Castellanos is swinging a hot bat, but other than him they are ice cold and Carrasco es en fuego! Over his last three starts he’s 2-0 with 23 innings pitched, 24 Ks and 2 ER. Yes, please and thank you. Carrasco is the highest priced pitcher tonight, but with some creative pairing I’m confident we can piece together a winning roster. Brandon Woodruff, $14,100, versus Pittsburgh is just what the doctor ordered to balance out the high price tag of Carrasco. Woodruff has been very serviceable since being called up in early August. He’s 1-1 with 1.52 ERA, with 20 Ks in 23.2 innings. He’s facing a scuffling Pirates squad that’s only won 4 of it’s last twelve games and they’ve only scored a total of 6 runs over the last 5 games. There’s not a ton of data to go off of for Woody, but I’ll take with the discounted price tag tonight. Now that our pitching is set, let’s take a look at our offensive options.
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Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Door Is Ajar, The DH Is Andujar
June 29, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 435 Commentsby: Grey
Yankees called up their 3B prospect, Miguel Andujar (3-for-4, 4 RBIs, and a steal), to fill-in for DL’d Matt Holliday. That reminds me of Joaquin Andujar, and now I’m sad. Gone too soon. RIP, Joaquin. “I always thought you’d kill someone before life killed you.” That’s my eulogy to him. Any hoo! I watched some game film on Andujar (while chewing on an unlit cigar, because that’s how scouts do it, right?), and he reminds me of so many Dominican players that take the Roberto Clemente/Vlad Guerrero approach. Old adage goes: You can’t walk your way off the island. We should have a glossary term for these type of hitters. Please suggest in the comments. Any hoo, Part 2: Still Hoo’ing, Andujar is raw, swings at a lot and makes contact, sometimes to his detriment. He could DH or see time at 3B, but will need to hit to stick. Could be a deep league power bat if he hits and Headley is benched indefinitely or Holliday stays out a while. Maybe Andujar will be so lucky that Girardi gets one more wish filled this year and looks at Andujar, saying, “Now, you be the Judge.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? One If By Land, Three If By Seager
June 21, 2017 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 560 Commentsby: Grey
Our Commissioner Manfred presses his intercom, “Please escort in the Guatemalan baseball stitchers.” Manfred’s secretary brings six men dressed in blanket ponchos and straw hats. Their leader steps forward, “Mr. Manfred, the Capri Suns you have us using to juice the balls is not working.” Their leader pulls out a baseball that is dripping with Ecto Cooler. Manfred turns in his seat, silhouetted with the setting sun. He lights a Virginia Slim 120 and pulls, coughing slightly. “I no longer want the balls juiced. Now….I want you and your friends to go to Dodger Stadium and blow.” “Mr. Manfred, we are not sex workers!” “Not blow like that! Put your lips together and blow.” “Like Bogey and Bacall?” “Yes! Now go!” …And this was how Dodger Stadium became a launching pad. Yesterday, Corey Seager (4-for-5, 6 RBIs) hit three homers (10, 11, 12), Yasmani Grandal (3-for-5, 2 runs) hit his 7th homer and Cody Launchangler (1-for-3, 2 RBIs) did it again, hitting his 22nd. Granted, someone needs to put Cody Launchangler in carbonite for Cooperstown — we can’t risk something happening to him playing baseball! — but this Seager guy is pretty good too, huh? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?
OPS Leaguers Unite! Outfielder Rankings Part 2
March 11, 2017 | OPS Leagues | 6 Commentsby: Phil B.
Not wasting any time, coming at cha faster than a cheetah on speed straight out of the LBC, it’s Part Duece of the OPS Outfielder Ranks! Part One can be found here, which covered the Top three tiers. We’re starting today with Tier four.
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Please, blog, may I have some more?
Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft, Final Recap
February 17, 2017 | 2017 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 9 Commentsby: mikeMaher
It took us a few weeks, but we have arrived at the finale. We can finally wrap up the Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft recaps. It feels like just yesterday I was getting started on what was likely to be a 60,000-word article on all 23 rounds of this mock draft before Grey slapped me and told me to put down the bourbon and split this into multiple posts. Below, I’ll be posting the results of rounds 19-23, my thoughts on said results, and the final team for every owner.
In case you have yet to see my previous posts, here is a quick recap of the league rules for this mock:
This mock was for a 15-team, 5×5 roto, with 23 roster spots made up of 9 pitchers (9), 1 spot for each position (8), a second catcher (1), 2 more outfielders (2), one corner infielder (1), one middle infielder (1), and one utility position (1).
Links to previous recaps:
Now, let’s get rounds 19-23 out of the way so that we can get to the good stuff!
Please, blog, may I have some more? Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft Recap, Rounds 1-6
January 16, 2017 | 2017 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 46 Commentsby: mikeMaher
Greetings, friends. I hopped over to the football side of things once last year’s baseball season ended, but now I’m back. And apparently, I am such a disturbed individual that I am doing fantasy baseball mock drafts in early January. And, I am writing about them. And, well, I just wanted to start another sentence with and because it feels so wrong but so right at the same time. Anyway, moving on.
I was fortunate enough to be invited to the Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft, and we’re going to recap it here. This mock was for a 15-team, 5×5 roto, with 23 roster spots made up of 9 pitchers (9), 1 spot for each position (8), a second catcher (1), 2 more outfielders (2), one corner infielder (1), one middle infielder (1), and one utility position (1). As long as I did that math correctly, that is 23 spots.
Below, I will provide the results for the first six rounds and a give my thoughts for each round. I’ll do the same for rounds 7-12, 13-18, and 19-23 in subsequent posts. I’ll try to keep it brief. All we really care about are the results here, right? Feel free to tell me how awesome or crappy you think my team is, along with what you think were the best and worst picks of the draft or the different rounds…
Please, blog, may I have some more?Welcome back for another star-studded event! Assuming you hack into your favorite online dictionary and replace the definition of ‘star’ with “guy who lives in his mom’s basement and screams when someone finishes his Doritos,” and next to the definition of ‘stud’ you put a picture of yourself. The Razzballies are the only award show where it’s totally fine to show up in sweatpants, and for your fingers to be orange from Cheetos. We don’t judge. We will occasionally mock. Mock-judge, tomato-tomahto. Get over it! I hope you enjoyed the clip show where I inserted myself into various baseball clips from this year. How about the clip where I was Joe Maddon intentionally walking Bryce Harper? Hee-lar-e-US! So, before I’m talking to no one but a room full of seat-fillers, here’s the year-end awards for the best and worst of fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?As we always do about this time! *beat drops, Grey does the worm, Grey’s iPhone alarm goes off, time to put more money in the meter* Damn, how long was I worming for? September 1st hits and teams expand their rosters to the Four-Oh. Now pour some extra bullpen guys out for all the dead moments between pitcher changes. So, what does this mean for all of us, fantasy baseballers (<–my mom’s term!)? It means call-ups and rookie nookie is aplenty. Aplenty, I tell ya! By the by, for big boned people, rather than an X-Large t-shirt, they should call them aplen-Tees. Yeah, I just made the English language better. High-five yourself for even knowing to read me. *Grey worms, alarm goes off* Damn, I need to get more coins. At this point in the year, you need guys that are getting everyday playing time, so I’m pumped up the jam on rookie nookie, but if a guy isn’t playing every day, he’s as good as dirt in redraft leagues, and I don’t have a Soil category, do you? It’s a most exciting time to be alive and be fantasy balling, but don’t lose sight of the real goal here: to get quality at-bats from guys that are playing, not to pick up a guy that will be great in 2017. (Unless you’re in a keeper league; then, by all means, knock yourself out! Not literally! Ouch.) Which bring us to Yoan Mocada. Red Sox manager, John Farrell, says Moncada’s promotion is eminent. They have a bobblehead giveaway planned, a kid’s jersey giveaway, a ‘Yoan yawn coverer’ which is really just a foam hand, a–*intern whispers in my ear* Seems I was misusing ‘promotion.’ I already gave you my Yoan Moncada fantasy. He’ll be up on Friday. He should be owned everywhere and will play 3rd base. No Gas Face there. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more? Hendricks Gins Up Another Gem
August 31, 2016 | Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 360 Commentsby: Grey
Yesterday, Kyle Hendricks went 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks, lowering his ERA (if that’s even possible at this point) to 2.09. The Seattle museum, Experience Music Project is going to need to update their Hendricks section. EMP Tour guide, “In 1970, Hendricks said, ‘I’m going to take my guitar, grab Janis, impregnate Afeni Shakur, have my lawyer write a letter that says Ben and/or Jerry can never name an ice cream after me while simultaneously sucking and blowing this joint. Then thirty-six years later, I’m going to win the NL Cy Young if the BBWAA votes based on ERA.’ Now, let’s move on to our five floors of Nirvana memorabilia. There’s some interesting flannel stories I can’t wait to share.” No, of course, Kyle Hendricks isn’t this good. His fastball velocity is down to 87 MPH, he’s relying heavily on a changeup that isn’t that much slower and his BABIP is absurdly low. Not saying you drop him, but if Hendricks does win the Cy Young, in 2017, the same faith that befell Dallas Keuchel this year will happen to Hendricks too. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?
DraftKings: Don’t Ivan Worry, It’s Nova for Shova.
August 28, 2016 | DraftKings | 2 Commentsby: Mike Honcho
First and foremost, I’d like to thank all of the loyal readers out there in the Kingdom of Razz. I’d also like to apologize, kinda. You see, what I’m about to do makes me feel dirty. There’s no way I would’ve considered this earlier in the season. Ultimately, the time has come. I’m suggesting Ivan Nova for your DFS pleasure this afternoon. I need a shower. Hopefully he’ll pitch well enough that I won’t end up crying in the shower. That’s another story for another blog. Anyway, here’s the thing…..He’s facing the Brewers and they’re extremely generous when it comes to swings and misses. Milwaukee leads the majors with a 25.2% strikeout rate and over the last 7 days that number jumps to 27.2%. That’s certainly not optimal if you find yourself rooting for the home team. For today, that’s music to our prospective daily fantasy ears. Their .316 wOBA lands them right in the middle of the pack and the .156 ISO they’ve produced thus far shouldn’t scare you away either.
As far as Nova is concerned, he’s never had issues with his control as his 1.91 BB/9 suggests – so he shouldn’t stuff the bases with potential landmines. In fact, ever since the trade from the Yankees, he’s held opponents to nine runs over 25 1/3 innings and produced a 3-0 record in his four starts. To his credit, Nova is doing a fantastic job keeping the ball on the ground, producing a 2.25 GB/FB ratio which to be honest has played a big part in his remarkable turn around since being dealt to the Pirates. So there you have it amigos, take advantage of his $8,000 price tag, put on your Sunday chaps and jump on the back of my Hog – We’re left lane cruising to Nova Nova land.
Here’s a look at my favorite suggestions for today’s action:
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Please, blog, may I have some more?In my preseason Randal Grichuk sleeper post (hey, they’re not all Delino DeShields sleepers, which is to say God awful vs. just merely bad), I said, “How much Grichuk can Grichuk chuck if Grichuk strikes out 30% of the time? Now, I’m no gypsy; I’m just a boy, standing in front of a girl that was born in a manger in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. Let’s look at some comp hitters, shall we? Not to answer, but to keep reading. Last year, Grichuk struck out 31% of the time after striking out 23% of the time in Triple-A. His minor league strike out rate makes me think he’ll be closer to a 27-28% strikeout guy. Brandon Moss is also around a 27-28% strikeout guy, which Grichuk should be. Grichuk won’t walk as much as Moss, but, okay, they’re close enough for me. Grichuk is a young Moss. I shall call him Pete Moss.” And that’s me quoting me! Maybe old fools die hard with a vengeance while Samuel Jackson screams at them, but Grichuk was just some bad luck with his BABIP away from being exactly what I thought he’d be. His strikeout rate is 27.8% (vs. Moss’ 30%), and he’s only 25 years old. I’m still jazzed on Grichuk like Coltrane with a needle in my vein. Of course, none of this matters if he didn’t hit a bunch of homers this week, and was available in about 75% of leagues. Plant Pete Moss on your team and watch the growth! Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Please, blog, may I have some more?A little birdie told me our 2024 Fantasy Baseball subscriptions are live. The little birdie also said it includes our Draft War Room. You really wanna lose in a fantasy baseball league to a little birdie? Would be kinda embarrassing, tbhhttps://t.co/1ag7IFSYS0
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