Drew Stubbs will replace Willy T.  (<–Sounds like characters from a blaxploitation film.  And neither are African-American.  Weird!)  Stubbs might get the shaft vs. righties but he can be baadasssss for speed.  Drew Stubbs was selected a few picks before Travis Snider in the first round of the 2006 draft.  Not for his power… No, he won’t have much of that.  Not for his Ks either, but he may have a lot of those.  In Triple-A, he had 104 Ks in 107 games.  In. Triple. A.  That’s not a great sign.  If you need speed, SAGNOF!, but Stubbs might come as an average liability.  In one league, I dropped Snider (that was quick) for Stubbs, because I need speed more than power in that league.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Joey Votto – Left with blurry vision.  Will be evaluated today.  Votto’s teammates could really mess with him by all wearing those novelty t-shirts that says, “1 Tequila, 2 Tequila, 3 Tequila, Floor,” with the blurry type.

Johnny Cueto – Heads to the Disgraceful List with a plus-10.00 ERA in the 2nd half.  I’m sure Cueto’s owners wish he were on the DL for the last two months.  If you were having any problems pulling the trigger on dropping him, the Reds took care of that for you.  I’ll see you next March, Cueto, fairly well ’til then.

Hiroki Kuroda – Heads to the DL with a concussion. (Pun point for Grey.)  Jeff Weaver or Vicente Padilla will fill in for him.  Blech for the Blue.

John Smoltz – Smoltz signs with the Cards.  I wouldn’t pick him up outside of NL-Only leagues.  I don’t think he’ll suddenly be worthwhile just moving back to the NL.  Maybe some matchups potential.  But that’s about it.  I know Chi-Ali said, “Age ain’t nothing but a number,” but Chi-Ali’s in jail for murder, so let’s assume he doesn’t own Smoltz either.

Matt LaPorta – Should’ve been called up two months ago.  Shoot, he shouldn’t have been down in the minors to begin with.  If someone can figure out what Eric Wedge was doing in Crazy Town for the last few months, let us know.  In Triple-A, Matt LaPorta had 41 walks to only 54 Ks.  He had 17 homers in 92 games and a near .400 OBP.  I’d grab LaPorta if I needed some pop.  I like Snider a bit better for UTIL pop, but LaPorta has better eligibility.  They’re kinda tomato-tomahto.

Carlos Quentin – HRs in back-to-back games.  He’s capable of 12 homers the rest of the way.

Zach Greinke – 7 IP, 4 ER, 8 Ks.  Since May 31st, Greinke has a 3.56 ERA.  Cust kayin’.

Justin Verlander – 8 IP, 3 ER, 10 Ks.  Greinke, I see your bid for a Cy Young and I raise you my own.

Cliff Lee – 9 IP, 2 Hits, 0 ER, 11 Ks.  A pitcher on the phone with his agent, “I wanna frickin’ face a pitcher three times a game!  I wanna face frickin’ Augie Ojeda three times a game!  Rusty Ryal?  Ryal?  What’s that, Gaelic?  I wanna face Rusty Irishman!”  Agent, “I understand, Mr. Halladay.  You have to talk to J.P.”

Dan Haren – 5 IP, 6 ER.  Now up to 2.74 ERA on the year.  It sure is a slow climb to a 3.25 ERA.

Jered Weaver – 9 IP, 0 ER.  Hey, there’s 1st half Jered Weaver again!  Hey, 1st half Jered Weaver, say hello to your mother for me.

Carlos Guillen – HR yesterday and three in the last seven games while batting .333.  I’m no fan of Guillen, but he’s batting in the middle of the order and he’s seeing the ball well (unlike Votto).

Carlos Gonzalez – Another homer yesterday.  This is getting ridiculous.  Oh, and Barmes hit his 20th.

Clay Buchholz – 6 IP, 1 ER.  It was about three starts ago I said I’d own Buchholz.  Since then, he’s under a 1.50 ERA.

Pat Burrell – Another homer.  Now has 8 more left in his bat.

B.J. Upton – Back-to-back games with homers.  I speak for all his owners when I say, “It’s about time.”

Bronson Arroyo – 8 IP, 1 ER, 5 Ks.  Sure, it was vs. Giants, but I’ve been saying since mid-July I actually like Arroyo in the 2nd half.

Chipper Jones – The Braves scored 15 runs; Chipper went 0-for-3 with 1 Run.  Ticker tease!

Mat Latos – 3 2/3 IP, 5 ER.  The Cubs aren’t great average-wise vs. righties, they were in Petco… Well, this should end Latos’s time on anyone’s team.  Sorry, these rookie pitchers never end well.

Clayton Kershaw – 3 2/3 IP, 2 ER.  How many pitches do you think he threw in under 4 innings?  If I gave you the over/under of 95, which way would you go?  I’d love to see an extra inning game between the D’Backs and the Dodgers, where both bullpens were emptied, and they were forced to throw Kershaw and Scherzer.  It’s immediately sudden death because neither pitcher may go more than three innings.

Bill Wagner – He’s a middle reliever barring a trade or K-Rod getting into the same subway as Brian Bruney.  There’s lots of middle relievers I’d own before Wagner.

Angel Pagan – Was one of three players nominated by the Mets for the Henry Aaron Award, the award given to the top offensive player of each league.  I guess there’s no Tommy Aaron Award.

Bill Hall – Acquired by the Mariners.  They’re just trying to make Beltre seem more appealing.  I know that trick!  You act like a complete imbecile around your girlfriend’s sister, then when you meet the parents they have severely low expectations of you, having heard stories from the sister.  Then you act normal, and the parents are like, “Hey, he’s not that bad.  He used utensils!”  And it gets the parents thinking your girlfriend’s sister is just jealous.  What?  Am I the only one that does this?

  1. s221506 says:

    Reimold, Dukes, or Cargo for the rest of the season?

  2. Steve says:

    Tommy Aaron has more major golf championships than all of those Mets have World Series rings.


  3. Steve says:

    @Steve: OK – you might have that wrong.

    Sorry, K-Rod and Sheff but you know what I mean…

  4. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @s221506: cargo. he’s just killing it right now. too bad someone with a higher waiver priority jumped on him in my league.

  5. Why does Grey hate my son so? He has 25 homers and never even a peep in his column. Is it his inferior mustache, or maybe Grey just thinks named Andre are only fit for playing violin and running away from the Boche. Week in and week out I hear of his mancrush on Nick Markakis and nary a fine word for my good boy Andre. How much longer must this injustice continue?

  6. timSTi says:

    I started CarGo over CQ the past two days and got SONOVABENCHED by CQ but then got UN-SONOVABENCHED by CarGo the same night. How long can this streak keep up?

    And I’m really starting to be glad I held onto Werth. If only he could get his AVG up .020 points higher.

    Starting Johan, Pineiro, & Wandy tonight. Is it bad that I’m nervous?

  7. nmdunkel says:

    I’m so gay for Carlos Gonzalez right now. Garrett Jones was just a fling.

    Thanks for introducing us, Grey. We hit it off great from the start (<—pun point for Nate).

  8. knightown says:

    Every year there is a guy I despise because they are too good to be dropped but have some completely unusable stretches. This year that guy is Jared Weaver. In his past 4 starts he’s had 2 11 k gems and a complete game shutout. The other start was a 7 earned in 4 inning doozie. I benched him for the first three and started him for the fourth.

  9. mgeoffriau

    mgeoffriau says:

    I’m a little behind on innings and have plenty of moves left, so I’m considering streaming some pitchers…I’m looking at tomorrow’s starters, and noticed Andy Pettitte’s numbers over the last month:

    32.1 IP 1W 35K 2.23 ERA 1.02 WHIP

    What is this? Other than the bizarre fact that over 32.1 innings he could only get 1 win on that team, those are excellent numbers. On the other hand, he’s pitching against Boston tomorrow. (Borrowing the joke) On the other hand, he shut Boston down for 7 innings on August 9th.

  10. TYY says:

    Votto had “blurry vision”

    awesome, what isn’t wrong with this dude?

    Dusty says he’ll be in the line up tonight though. We’ll see. Ahhh and look who he’d be facing, Matt Cain. Hopefully Cain doesn’t hit another one of my players in the temple and put him on the DL.


  11. Frank Rizzo says:

    I’m not dropping Votto for Guillen or anything, but Grey’s right. As a Tiger fan who watches most games, I agree that Guillen has quality AB’s every time he steps up to the plate right now. The guy is torture on opposing pitchers with the way he works the count and won’t strike out. If it’s close he just swats at it to foul it off, waiting for a better pitch to swing hard at. He’s been pretty solid.

    Guillen did, however, seem to strain his troubled back last night on one of his swings. Of course that was the AB where he grimaced on every swing, had about a 10 pitch AB, and hit a line drive solo shot that got out in about 2 seconds.

    Cliff Lee was silly last night. Just silly. Probably the best trade I made all year, when he was an Indian and his stock was low.

    Aramis you’re killing me! Are you healthy or not? Yes, I sat his 2-5, 2 R, 1 HR, 3 RBI azz last night.

  12. mgeoffriau

    mgeoffriau says:

    @Frank Rizzo: I got Cliff Lee 2 starts before he was traded….I’m pretty excited too.

    And I benched Aramis as well. SONUVA….

  13. Critter Nagurski says:

    They have internet in prison now. Charles Manson has a blog I think.

    So for tonight what do you think. Kawakami, Hammel, or watch my IP deficit creep up? It’s a K:BB league so Kawakami scaaares me

  14. mr baseball says:

    this sunday smoltz does have a good match up petro – if he looks bad there then HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM

    STL: J. Smoltz (0-0, 0.00)
    SD: C. Carrillo (1-1, 11.88)

  15. mr baseball says:

    Carlos Gonzalez – still waiting for teams to drop him :)

  16. mr baseball says:

    I drated Johnny Cueto in as many leagues that I could if the price was right – then I dropped him in every league – now I be recieving messages on the league message board from the unhappy owners that thought they were getting a serviceable player from me for free

  17. papasmurf says:

    Nice tip on how to act around my lady’s family!

  18. mr baseball says:

    a good pitcher gone bad – Zach Greinke

    what is the difference with Zach Greinke from the start of the season to now – I heard he has nasty stuff – Is it just location or his lost some speed off his fast ball – Is Greinke Pitching Coach here to answer this

    I myself just can’t watch a Royal game so I don’t watch Zach Greinke pitch

  19. inertiatic says:

    Would Latos be worthy of keeper status just yet on a 25 man carryover roster?

  20. mr baseball says:

    Would Latos be worthy of keeper status just yet on a 25 man carryover roster? – who is between that you are thinking to drop
    I think he showed enough for me to keep him around for another year

  21. mr baseball says:

    Margaret White: They’re all gonna laugh at you. for picking Carlos Quentin this year

  22. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @inertiatic: i would consider it, but remember he’ll be up and down and probably won’t pitch much more than 150 innings or so. should/could be a decent source of Ks and ratios though he won’t have too much run support.

  23. Tarasco's Secret Stash says:

    Re: Mr. Baseball, yeah, not for nothing but Smoltz gets a Petco start followed by the Nats to kick off his exodus back to the NL. As a Sox fan who suffered through his outings (including getting stuck between two ruthlessly fat Bronxians in the Yankee Stadium bleachers for the last turd sandwich he dropped) I’ll admit I was a bit disappointed they cut him loose so quick.

    His problem throughout his Sox tenure was fastball location, which speaks more to a problem of mechanics and release point than it does a problem of his shoulder not working anymore. He was sitting comofrtably low 90’s and showed good bite on his slider throughout, and his outings were generally cases of 1 bad inning and an abrud BAA near .400. Even still he put up good peripherals, which I would expect to improve all the more with a jump back to the NL. I took a flier on him in a 16 team mixed league, and I’d have done it in a twelver too.

  24. AL KOHOLIC says:

    @knightown: weaver is 13-4.a sub 4 era and a 1.22 whip,if your not starting him most every night then id talk to the [email protected]mr baseball: did you watch last nights game?latos stunk,but as grey has preached numerous times,rookie or young pitchers will struggle gallardo,chamberlain etc.,i like him but he will have some bumps along the way

  25. JR says:

    Taveras has a 556 (!) OPS this year. Has anyone in the last twenty years had a lower OPS in a season with over 400 ABs. Rudy? Rudy!!!

  26. Frank Rizzo says:

    Votto’s in the lineup for today. Anyone brave enough to start him and his blurry eyes?

  27. Dingo says:

    Of course Weaver sonovabenched me last night. The worst part about the start is that it’s not really a sign that he’s back to pitching like an ace. Cleveland put 30 balls in play against him, and only 7 of those turned into hits. He allowed 12 fly balls (according to fangraphs.com), but all of them stayed in the park. In short, he had about as much good luck in this start against Cleveland as he had bad luck in his prior start against them (16 balls in play, 8 hits, including 2 HRs).

  28. Dingo says:

    @knightown: Nice to see I’m not the only one.

  29. stumanji says:

    Drop Alexei for CarGo? I’m currently playing Aybar at SS so Alexei is just stashed in case he gets hot, but I also have an abundance of OFs in Ichiro, C.Lee, Ibanez, Dye, Choo, and Rajai. I can only play 4 of them since I have A.Hill cemented in one of my two Util spots. Choo and Dye have been the odd men out lately since I want Rajai’s steals.

  30. stumanji says:

    Also, Wandy vs. Fla tonight? He was terrible last time out and I can’t afford to get strapped to the WHIPping post if Fla gets another 10+ hits (for the 16th straight game).

  31. Dad says:

    @JR: Mike Hampton’s career OPS is .650 and Livan Hernandez is at .541. That’s rather pathetic if your Taveras.

    Nick Punto had a .562 in 2007 with 472 at-bats. I didn’t do a search/sort, i just thought of the worst players with full-time jobs and he quickly came to mind.

  32. Paulie Allnuts

    Paulie Allnuts says:

    @Steve: I believe that Grey is referring to Tommy Aaron, the brother of Henry Aaron. He was that generation’s Billy Ripkin. His claim to fame is that he shares a ML record, along with his brother Henry: most home runs by brothers: 768. Since Hank hit 755, you can figure out what part Tommy played in the record.

  33. inertiatic says:

    @mr baseball: /poon tycoon – I’d lose him for the hot pick up of the week. My concern is that I’ll need his spot as the playoffs approach. I have room to keep him, just didn’t know if it would be worth the risk of losing a BN spot come playoffs. Admittedly my chances of winning are slim.

  34. Paulie Allnuts

    Paulie Allnuts says:

    Grey – I wonder who the other 2 mets were who were nominated for the Hank Aaron award. Castillo and Sheff? If you really want to make a Mets fan depressed, add up the stats of Delgado, Reyes, Wright, and ‘Tran and compare them with last year.

    What SAGNOF do you prefer – Borbon or Stubbs? (Note-for those in Yahoo leagues, Stubbs is presently on waivers)

    Also, regarding Jobacum – outside of K’s, he hasn’t done anything helpful in quite awhile. Would it be heresy considering cutting him, outside of a keeper league? His peripherals are killing me in weekly H2H leagues.

    Thanks again. Recent recommendations that have added swagger to my fantasy teams include Car-Go and Arroyo (sitting in the FA trash bin of about every league I am in)

  35. Nuke LaLoosh says:

    Help me Grey, you’re my only hope!

    In my 7×6 roto keeper league (5×5 scoring, with OBP, SLG%, and HLD as the extra categories), I am in 2nd place, but am next-to-last in saves.

    I have been making up SV ground since I traded for Fuentes (I sold off Zorilla) and Bell (I sold the mark of Cain), and grabbed Frasor off the wire (thanks for the tip!)

    I’m about 5 points away from first, and I have a trade offer headache.

    Everybody else wants Big Donkey/Country Strong, who I have in my IF slot. I’m getting offers for closers who have elite stuff but crap opportunities, in my view. I have one offer for Nathan (with R. Ludwick as a throw in) for Dunn, another offering K-Rod for Dunn , straight up.

    I will ask you the impossible question — how many saves will Nathan and/or K-Rod actually get from now to the end of the season?

    I am leaning towards keeping BD/CS, despite my 15-HR lead in homers, because I can still make up a couple of points here and there in OBP, R, and RBI, especially since I can keep Dunn another 2 years. Also, on principle, I’d rather not trade for a $12 salad.

  36. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Paulie Allnuts: Stubbs They are Castillo and Sheff. Lose Jobacum.

  37. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Nuke LaLoosh: How many points can you make up if you get 10 saves the rest of the way? If that’s more than you can gain holding Dunn, then make the trade. If not, forget it.

  38. inertiatic says:

    Stubbs or Escobar for my speedy gonzalez spot?

  39. Paulie Allnuts

    Paulie Allnuts says:

    @Grey: What an awesome Rudy column! The shame of it is that it received only two comments. According to Rudy’s stats, Taveras would have been in the thick of the race for the worst outfielder ever, a bit behind Brian Hunter, but ahead of Darren Lewis. However, who knows how he would fare if Willy’s Adjusted OPS were added to the mix?

  40. Beau says:

    Which is a safer to drop to grab Stubbs in a league where I am in first and can make up most ground in saves and steals, Mike Gonzalez or Angel Guzman? Another way to look at it, who is less likely to claim the closer spot in the near future?

  41. big o says:

    @Paulie Allnuts:
    steve may have gotten tommy aaron confused with tommy armour … a pretty decent golfer , but no way near as colorful as tommy bolt , who could “wing” a club with the best of them .
    followed behind tommy bolt and hit into his group , in an attempt to stir things up . tommy was 55 years + at the time , and it was just a casual round …. and either he didn’t feel like “playing” or was giving me the benefit of the doubt , but nothing developed .
    maybe ‘cuz the pro i was playing with told me he would “twist my neck” as i set-up to do it a 2nd time .

  42. Grey

    Grey says:

    @Paulie Allnuts: Yeah, my guess Willy T. would be right there.

    @Beau: Are you going to play Stubbs? If so, over who? I probably would just hold tight since you need saves too.

  43. Beau says:

    I would have to play Stubbs over McCuthchen, Sizemore, Ethier, or Holliday. Im using playing Borbon right now for SAGNOF. So yeah, probably doesnt make sense at all.

  44. Anthony G says:

    Props for the Chi Ali Reference! Hadnt heard that name in a few years.

  45. ThePoonTycoon says:

    @Nuke LaLoosh: if you really think you can make up saves ground, i’d take the nathan/ludwick for dunn deal. ludwick should finish with around 100 RBIs and could get hot and finish with more. basically i think ludwick gives you enough that you at least hold your position in the offensive categories. and the twins aren’t a bad team, not like pads/nats bad or anything, i think nathan could give you as many saves as anyone over the last 6 weeks.

  46. GTS says:

    Should I start Correira vs STL at PETCO on Sunday?

  47. Grey

    Grey says:

    @GTS: I would.

  48. GTS says:

    Everth or A. Escobar for speed at MI slot?

  49. Grey

    Grey says:

    @GTS: Everth

  50. DrEasy says:

    LaPorta or Venable?

  51. GTS says:

    @Grey: @Grey: Thanks Grey!

  52. Grey

    Grey says:


  53. Steve says:

    @big o: Tommy Aaron won The Masters in 1973.

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