Corners Report: Geezer Hot Streak

This week is prom, my knees, and Craig Kimbrel reminded me—age doesn’t care. But in fantasy baseball? Sometimes, age wins.

Saturday night, my son went to his first prom. I couldn’t care less about prom as an entity. But he has severe autism, and his class went, so we went along. None of this is the main point of the story. It’s called the setting.

So, as we went up the stairs to eat dinner, his best friend was there. My daughter, a certain type of creature known as “teenager,” told him my name. It was accurate, but telling a hyper literal 20 year old my name is Old Geezer was a bit of a low blow. Nevertheless, he continued to call me that the entire time we were there, and everyone laughed (including me, I’m an old geezer, not a cranky one).

Wednesday night, the Gwinnett Stripers (who my teenager called the strippers, don’t buy that hat!) played in Durham against the Bulls. A really fun part of AAA baseball is the older guys trying to get back into the bigs. Craig Kimbrel got the win, former starting 1B Garrett Cooper was there, and Eloy Jimenez was unsurprisingly a late scratch with a muscle issue of some sort.

This week was dominated by age for me. From seeing high schoolers at a prom and remembering that I didn’t go to mine, to seeing former standouts in the minor leagues, and losing in one-on-one hoops to my daughter, the age is really kicking in here.

To help salve the wounds of time, this article will focus on the elderly players in the corner positions and their standout performances in the past seven days. I generally do not draft guys once they hit, oh, like age 33 or so. These guys might be proving that theory wrong.

Freddie Freeman: Wow. Just wow. The narrative behind Ol’ Frederick was that the ankle would be an issue, he was starting to decline, and the value of him in the second round was toast. On the season, he is batting .378 with nine home runs and 33 RBI. In just the past seven days, the guy with the same initials as the Foo Fighters is batting .500 with a 1.000 slugging percentage and 3 home runs. I jumped on Bryce Harper in the second round where I could; apparently Freeman was the same way to go. There’s no reason to think this future Hall of Famer is slowing down soon.

Paul Goldschmidt: In the past seven, he has not slowed down. The power is still there with a .609 slugging percentage in that time frame. There’s no real red flags on his statcast, so you have to stick with him here. The expected batting average is sitting at .299, the bat speed isn’t flagging, and I’m as shocked as you are. Just ride it out and see what happens.

Christian Walker: Walker is showing some signs of life, slashing .364/.462/.500 in the past week. Going with the narrative theory here, maybe he put pressure on himself and struggled in a new environment earning big money? He’s not been a terribly streaky hitter in the past when you look at monthly splits. He’d be one to target if someone dropped him after his bad April. It’s not like the first base position is especially deep.

Jose Ramirez: Well, look who keeps popping up here. I know he’s getting up there in years, and I faded him in draft season (I somehow have never drafted the guy!) But lookie here! .391/.462/.652 in the past seven, raising his season average to .289 to go with six homers and 12 steals. 12! Who do you think you are, Pete Crow-Armstrong? Obviously, he’s the most valuable 3B, he always has been.

Now’days everybody wants to talk like they got something to say, but nothing comes out when they move their lips. Just a bunch of jibberish!

Mother Grabbers act like they forgot about Jose. (Please tell me people still know that song! It’s as current as my rap game gets.)

Nolan Arenado: Now this one, I had no idea would happen. The batting average is right where it’s been, so no decline at age 34. It does seem he’s traded off power for contact. Arenado simply is trying to make contact. The strikeout rate is in the top 3% of the league. That’s good. The velocity metrics though, are lower (16 percentile hard hit, 11 percentile exit velocity), so don’t expect a big power season. I think he can keep up his current pace, though, and in the dystopian landscape that is third base, he’s a valuable player.

Manny Machado: Another future Hall of Fame player (yeah, I said it), Machado is hitting .331 right now with 3 home runs. Steals aren’t coming, come on, guys. He’s torn both ACL! Not now, in the past. No slowing down for Manny either; the past week is a slash of .478/.520/.609. Just look at this:

So, so pretty, Machado good. Own him good.

Age is just a number, right? Maybe if these guys can rake at their advanced age, this Old Geezer can slay and pop off as well.