by: Grey
Yesterday was the day of doubleheaders and no one had a bigger doubleheader…Damn it, Darren Aronofsky, all I can think about is Jennifer Connelly in Requiem for a Dream! Seriously, he ruined me for not only any mention of doubleheaders but I just hear the word “double” and I start to think I know where […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Some days are “No offense” type days and yesterday felt like one of those days. Maybe it was the rain across the Eastern seaboard, he said like an old wily ship’s captain. Maybe it was something else in the air. Farts? Who knows, but better yet, who cares! Yesterday, EdCab showed why you should delete […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Another day, another insane Phillies’ starter goes HAM, not as in Taylor or cured honey, but as in HARD AS A MOTHERFUDGER. Only he didn’t say fudger, he said the mother of all curses, and he thought, “If it’s Hard As A, wouldn’t it be HAAM? Then it’s basically HAIM and it’s the best singing […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?Once a generation a pitcher comes along that is extraordinary. Extra plus ordinary. It’s not often we get to witness it with our own eyes. Previous generations, some of those pitchers were Max Scherzer, Pedro Martinez, Roger Clemens, Nolan Ryan, then before I was born, so I don’t know. Too old for me! I’m a […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
“If you mix one part gin with one part speed and one part power and one part average and one part “possibly a Quad-A player,” and one part good contact and one part–How many parts is that?” Excuse me, I’m asking the bartender, Isaac, how to make an Issac Collins. Turns out I had it […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Weird thing happened yesterday, everyone threw a great start, but I had written a lede for all of them this year previously. Hate to double up, even though Shane Baz, Hunter Brown, Cristopher Sanchez, and Kevin Gausman were all worthy. So, instead, let’s marvel at Clayton Kershaw (6 IP, 1 ER, 3 baserunners, 5 Ks, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Yesterday, Yusei Kikuchi went 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 12 Ks, ERA at 2.82. This start had Streamonator losing its mind over it, predicting a start of 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks. Yikes, not even close! Three fewer baserunners! Those two runs ended up unearned! And he had more Ks! […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?How about Framber Suarez! I mean, how about Ranger Valdez! Ramber Suadez! Frager Valrez! How about them all? Can you not put your hands together and celebrate good pitching without them being aces? You’re such a try-hard with your, “Ooh, I need aces,” and I’m like, “These guys are good enough for you,” all preseason, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
“Trevor Rogers shoved, bro!” I hear that, and my first thought is, “I do not have a brother for Rogers to shove.” My second thought is, “Why is he shoving people? Does he need anger management? I am legitimately concerned for Trevor Rogers.” My third thought is, “There’s no third thought.” My fourth thought is, […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Chase Burns will be called up for Tuesday. Mr. Burns if you’re nasty or Smithers. Chase if you’re patio furniture or on the show Cops. CB if you’re a terrible ump with the last name Bucknor. Cha-Bu if you’re ordering something in a Korean restaurant and mispronouncing it. He is coming. The 2nd overall pick […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
I asked ChatGPT this great philosophical question, “If mom says don’t play ball in the house, and when she said it she was in the Brady House, and Brady House plays ball, is he making mom mad?” ChatGPT didn’t say anything in return, but smoke rose from its robot ears and started sputtering. I defeated […]
Please, blog, may I have some more? by: Grey
Philadelphia Phillies is such a funny name. It’s like the California Calis or the New York Yorkies. How’d that get through 150 years of name changes to get to us? ACKSUALLY, I wonder if it’s because it’s such an old name it’s how it’s here. The name is from 1883, and back then people would […]
Please, blog, may I have some more?