| Player Page Matches |
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by: Grey
The Brewers called up shortstop, Jean Segura. Woohoo! Now, on various teams, I have Domonic Brown, Mike Olt, Straily, Starling Marte, Brett Jackson, Josh Vitters and some serious Short Eyes. I’m basically the creepy guy hanging around the playground in my Astrovan, blasting “Hey Nineteen” wearing candy jewelry like I’m Mr. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Grey
Josh Vitters and Brett Jackson were called up on Sunday. Here’s what I just said on Friday when I told you to pick Vitters up, “(He) comes with high expectations simply because Cubs fans are like a 104-year-old virgin who would just love to touch the playoffs’ boobies. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: LT
Points leagues can be frustrating. In last week’s post, I put a written smack down on some men I didn’t and still don’t like very much. There is still time for those players to redeem themselves, so let’s try in good faith, not to hold it against them. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Grey
Comatose Pirates Fan, I have a surprise for you. You may want to sit down. No, no. It’s a good surprise. The salad days of Willie Stargell are back! (Though even Pops would’ve agreed salad wasn’t on his menu.) I’m excited for the Pirates, they’ve been the Andy Dufresne of major league baseball for far too long. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Fugs (Epic Beardmen Division) were joined atop the overall standings by Rank Railheads (RCL 40), each with 112 points. The Fugs have managed to overcome the lengthy absence of their number 1 pick (7th overall), Evan Longoria. The Railheads, with the 2nd pick, started their team with Miguel Cabrera. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Grey
So it’s not really the 2nd half mark in the fantasy baseball season, but it’s the All-Star Break so what else are we going to talk about? Hell’s Kitchen? Is it even believable that these people would one day be in charge of a kitchen? Please, blog, may I have some more?
There’s change once again at the top of the Master standings! The Fugs (Epic Beardmen Division) shot up from 11th to grab the lead with 109 points. Trini (Psychic Friends Network — RCL 22) moved back up the leaderboard and sits in second, just 1 behind. Please, blog, may I have some more?
We have a winner….and it’s Ankur Pandya (aka SalaChor) with 195 points. Ankur didn’t have any of the top 4 players (Brandon Moss, Trevor Plouffe, Pedro Alvarez, Brandon Phillips) but lucky for him, the 1.5% of those that picked one of these 4 didn’t otherwise pick particularly well. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Dan Pants
Carlos Marmol regained the ninth inning duties Friday night as he was called upon to get the save against Boston. Manager Dale Sveum explained he needed more stability and consistency from the tail end of the bullpen. You can’t argue Marmol hasn’t consistently given poor Cubs fans multiple heart attacks (they’re from Chicago so they naturally have multiple attacks). Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Grey
We all need a little wonder, so let me pose a question to you after this clunky intro. Was Matt Cain‘s perfect game the best one game pitching performance in major league history? I pose that question to you, young prematurely balding man, not to answer. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Trini (Psychic Friends Network – RCL 22) held onto first place in the Master standings, adding a point to make 108 total. Carlos Gonzalez hit .500 with 4 home runs and 9 RBI to pace the Psychics’ offense, while James McDonald gave up just 1 run in winning 2 games to anchor their pitching staff. Please, blog, may I have some more?
by: Grey
Paul Goldschmidt homered yesterday for the 2nd time in two games and third in his last four games. He’s also hitting around .400 in the last week. Goldschmidt may have had some Growing Pains, but don’t call him Tracey. Neil Young and I have been searchin’ for a heart of Goldschmidt, and finally AuShizz is translating from German into actual stats. Please, blog, may I have some more?
