The Jack attack is back. Or, in this case, the Jay Flambé is day-to-day. Makes no sense whatsoever. But it does roll off the tongue, does it not? The main point is, I’m back, your back, and, best of all, Sky is back. And we’re here to spotlight certain players for whom the mighty overlord of mustache’s, Grey, has yet to comb-over. And probably condition as well. You gotta figure with a mustache like that, you gotta condition. And since I’m nothing if not consistent, I’m back to try and sell you more Dick(ey). The innuendo is outrageous. But more outrageous than trying to sell you on him for yet another season? We shall see.
If you’re a masochist like me, here’s my 2500-word spectacle on how R.A. Dickey would cure cancer and give me two lovely children. I was so reckless in my youth… Now, a season later, it’s like I’ve learned nothing. Or maybe, I’ve learned something, and that something is nothing until I make it into something that won’t be nothing. My computer just fainted.
“I’ve had an upper back issue, whenever I extend, it would bite me pretty good. I’ve had to back it down… And I had a hernia, and then against the Royals early on this year I did this thing to my back, and the WBC was this year.”
So, if you can’t tell, that isn’t me talking. That would be R.A. Dickey. And, as you can see, he had some issues. Personally, I wouldn’t even want to get out of bed if I had a hernia and back issues, unless there’s a grilled steak or vagina(s) involved. But this brings us to the overwhelming conclusion that he simply wasn’t operating at his peak skill-level. And he still managed to throw 224.2 innings, the second highest total of his career. Granted, there are no bonus points in fantasy sports for gritty competitiveness (much to Danny Woodhead’s chagrin), and the production he accumulated for those of us who owned him for the first two months of the season, or, ahem, the entire season (oops), it was a slush of mediocre and frustrating. Which gives me flashes of my ex.
And injury is easily found in his velocity. 83.4 to 81.9 MPH from 2012 to 2013 on his fastball. More importantly, his knuckleball velocity dropped from 77.1 to 75.6 over the same time span. Troubling, but remember, these are pretty static numbers we are looking at. When switching over to a month-by-month view, we begin to see signs of R.A. Dickey getting healthier. Take a look at his 2013 knuckleball velocity trend: May- 74.44 MPH, June- 75.12 MPH, July- 75.39, Aug.- 76.97 MPH, Sept.- 77.18 MPH. While you could say these are subtle changes, let’s not forget that Dickey’s ‘fast’ knuckler (of which you can find info on somewhere near my marriage proposal to Dickey in my post referenced above) is velocity dependent in terms of success.
The thing is, I believe I was right in my previous analysis. The overriding failure here was the expectation of a healthy season. Now, I can’t confidently say he’ll return to ace-dome, and the fact that he does pitch in a homer-happy environment and a tough division certainly gives me some pause… But there’s no reason why he can’t improve on last season’s numbers. In fact, it’d be hard not to. I mean, it’s hard to imagine it getting any worse. Well, it could, but if it does, my heart will break. Queue some Michael Bolton. Pre-Honda. Plus, um, 15 years. Ef it, just give me some Bryan Adams.
If he simply meets somewhere in the middle from his 2012 and 2013 season, a very achievable goal, we’re looking at a 2/3 guy with good strike-out potential. And my sense is, you won’t have to pay market value for it. Which is probably why the Greydar did not detect him. Yeah, that’s it. I couldn’t think of a better ending. So, uh, I’m going to go now. It’s getting kind of awkward.