When I heard about the trade of Giancarlo Stanton to the Yankees, I went to Best Buy to secure an overhead projector so I could overlay my Powerpoint presentations of Marlins Park aka Hard Rock Stadium aka The Stadium That A Psychedelic Unicorn Vomited Up with his new park to see how many home runs Giancarlo was going to gain or lose from the stadium change.  However, when I arrived at Best Buy, I was told they didn’t have any overhead projectors, all they had were sales people in blue polos who didn’t know the difference between one computer from another except for the price.

Begollied (Made Up Word of the Day!), I got back in my Uber, telling my fare that I couldn’t take him through to his destination because I was too upset.  After a brief exchange of words, telling my fare where he could shove his Uber rating, I was punched out.  This sounds like a beginning of a story where I end up at St. Jude’s learning how to speak again, but it’s not.  While unconscious in my Ford Escort, a centaur with the head of Giancarlo galloped to me.  The centaur was dressed like Lady Godiva, naked except for a blonde mullet Giancarlo must’ve grown.  With nothing to grab onto that wouldn’t elicit sexual assault charges, I pulled on his hair, stuck my foot in his stirrup and pulled myself onto his back.  As we rode off, I asked what he expected to do with the Yankees and he said, “More of the same.”  Well, he neighed a few times, but I took it to mean that.

Giancarlo can hit home runs out of any park.  It’s not like Psychedelic Unicorn Park (PUP) was that great for hitters; it was 28th for offense last year and that was with Giancarlo.  In Yankee Stadium, will Giancarlo hit more?  Become *pinkie to mouth* Gain-carlo?  If you overlay his home runs last year with The House They Built Across The Street From The House Ruth Built, Giancarlo gains one extra home run.  Know why?  Because he already hits everything 600 feet.  A better park doesn’t matter.  His HR/FB last year 34.3% was kinda silly high, even for him.  I could see that coming down to around 29% (which is still goofy high), while his FB% actually goes up a tad to 42% (from 39.4).  In other words, basically a push.  Only thing stopping him from hitting 52+ HRs is health.   If he misses 50 ABs, that gives him about 38 less fly balls, and if he has a 29% HR/FB, it still puts him around 53 HRs.  Like I said 52+ HRs is pretty easy projection for him if he’s healthy.

The better lineup?  Sure, unless the world implodes because Giancarlo and his doppelgänger, Aaron Judge, are in the same place at the same time, like a Back to the Future time paradox.  His new lineup could also be viewed as a negative because he won’t have as many RBIs to drive in, because Judge will already have done that.  Of course, all of that might be offset by 50 ABs against Orioles pitching.  In all, this has to be a positive, and I’ll give Giancarlo Stanton the 2018 projections of 107/53/121/.273/3 in 547 ABs.

   
  1. knucks says:
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    Has anyone ever played in a “Net-SB’s” league?

    If yes, looking for a few thoughts/pointers. This AM I just took over a team for 2018 roto league with that category, which I have never used before.

    Going to have to maybe find a site that has a percentage success rate of SBs. And so I guess, this NSB category is a way to try to quantify and also kind of neutralize that stat for some players? My first thought is obviously guys who get CS more than others will lose a bit of value.

    So Grey, this will kind of be my approach when viewing your ranks in the spring. A guy that you mention you bump in ranks due to the potential for some legs… He isn’t going to have the same value for that category if he gets caught stealing often. So I”ll have to keep that in mind.

    In considering some of the 2017 stats for first round talent for 2018, I see that Blackmon ranked something like 50th in 2017 standard league with his 14 SBs.

    However with an NSB category… he added next to nothing in the speed for 2017. So maybe same for 2018, if he gets caught as often as he did last year??

    In 2017 Blackmon had an NSB of “4” (with 14 SBs). So in 2017, for a leagues using NSB, Blackmon would rank around 150th or so in the category. He’s among some really random/widely available players on that list.

    I got curious about what to look into next. I think my first task is going to be to locate guys who have a track record/pattern of CS year to year. Looking at Blackmon for 2016 he had an NSB of “8” (with 17 SBs). For context, an NSB of “8” would have him ranked around 67th in 2017. So not all that far off from where he ranked in a 2017 standard league!! So my strategy for the category so far hasn’t been the easiest to quickly pin down.

    SOS! Anyone have any thoughts or tips?

  2. Cram It says:
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    F the Yanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Haha

    • knucks says:
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      @Cram It: Agreed. Last night before I passed out I was reading Heyman saying the yanks were planning to keep it under the Lux Tax this year. And that pursuing Stanton with that goal in mind would be difficult. But clearly, when Deej rings the bat phone, that shizz changes real quick.

      LGM…

  3. BootsyBaby says:
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    It took the trade of the great Giancarlo to compel Grey to write an article on a December Saturday. A Saturday!

    Aside – II traded for Castro in my AL only league late last season, and am set to be the proud owner of a $14 Stanton for the next two years. Assuming this goes through as reported.

    Break out the spiked nog! Go Yanks!

    • knucks says:
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      @BootsyBaby: Hahhh to the first part. Assuming the second part was a joke?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ohtani compelled me too, because I wanted him to get his own article on Monday so Giancarlo had to go today… You got Giancarlo for Castro?! Man, you must love lopsided trades made by real teams…

    • Slappy Jack says:
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      @BootsyBaby: Wait, how do you trade for a NL player in an AL Only league?

  4. Jack Deth the Jew Jew says:
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    I can read it now. You return from your annual trip to see family in NYC, you and grandpa Joe step out for a slice and a nice grandpa/grandson chat. You walk into your favorite spot in the city and the following will be written “as Grandpa goes to take a whizz (his word for it) I’m standing alone at the counter when the person behind me bumps me. That SOB made me spill my grape soda all over my brand new ironic Milli Vanilli vintage not vintage tee. I’m pissed. Then it happens, its that voice, from the first syllable I knew who it was…Yes, Giancarlo, the one and only, Giancarlo…who just made me spill my grape soda all over my sweet tee and like that gushing soda that splattered all over me, my heart was gushing all over the best moment of my life. He grabbed some napkins and tried to help me clean it off my chest as I held back with all I had and let him touch me…..for once. We start chatting, made small talk about the weather and playing ball in NYC, he signs a paper plate for me (it’s all I can grab) and leaves. Im excited because, well its Giancarlo Mother Fuckin Stanton, and he doesnt recognize from the restraining order (he probably has so many). Never again will I wash that shirt, in fact when you walk in my front door its framed and hanging in the entry way like a cuneiform table from ancient Sumaria. Oh and Grandpa Joe missed the whole thing (stuck fly) so I’m not even sure if this was real because it was so surrrrrrrrrrrreal.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Stuck fly! Haha… Well played… You forgot… Right before I hand him the paper plate to sign, I lick discarded cheese from it, as I longingly eye Giancarlo…

      • Jack Deth the Jew Jew says:
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        @Grey: and dream weaver plays in the background ala Waynes World…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Then someone walks by playing Despacito, I sneer and Giancarlo sticks up for me… He’s my bodyguard!

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            My lover and protector!

            • Jack Deth the Jew Jew says:
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              @Grey: cue the whitney

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                NEAR….FAR…..Wherever Giancarlo are…

  5. thatguy says:
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    I would like to know how Mariners fans are going to survive the humiliation of the last couple weeks.

    They blasted Yankees fans for not being considered by Otani while simultaneously guaranteeing that Otani was going to become a Mariner.

    They cleaned out their farm system and pulled out all the stops to pad their offer to Otani.

    Then they got rejected by Otani……… For the ANGELS!!!! HAHAHA.

    Then today the Yankees got the last laugh by landing Giancarlo Stanton the reigning National League MVP.

    I would say I feel bad for Mariners fans, but I don’t!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Yeah, I don’t either… Don’t worry, they got Dee Gordon, he’s good for 2 HRs…

      • Dee says:
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        @Grey: How do you know I just don’t want to hit homeruns? Chicks dig steals Grey.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha

  6. InferiorHippo says:
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    If you had to pick right now, who do you like more for 2018, Dee Gordon or Schoop?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Gordon, I have them ranked next to each other right now tho

  7. InferiorHippo says:
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    I figured they were close. I actually traded Schoop for Dee because I needed steals. It worked but now I’m somewhat regretting it. I don’t love the move to the Mariners for Dee… good write up yesterday on it

    • InferiorHippo says:
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      @InferiorHippo: Meant to reply to you, dont know why i added a new comment…

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        No worries

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks, man!

  8. Brad says:
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    Hi Grey,

    Do you think the Marlins trade Ozuna and Yelich as well or do you think they’re both safe from a trade?

    Also, in my H2H keeper I was offered Freeman/Sale/Upton for Bryant/degrom/yelich. Which side do you like better? Cats are: R, Hits, RBIs, TBs, AVG, OPS, K’s, SB’s, W’s, ERA, WHIP, K:BB, K’s, Saves.

    Thanks,

    Brad

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Safe? They should want to be traded at this point… I think they’re under team control so will be remaining for now…. Freeman side

  9. bill says:
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    I missed the announcement that the yanks had acquired a new farm team. Just like the old days, wow. How cute, they sent Jeter to run it. No collusion there. If this was real fantasy baseball that trade would be vetoed.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      HA, totally

  10. BringBackPluto says:
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    If anyone’s up for a spot in a $200 15-team start-up dynasty, let me know. Need a couple more owners.

  11. Jon says:
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    Which side do you like in a keeper league? Odor+Acuna or Price+Conforto?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Odor

      • SteveNZ says:
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        @Grey: ODOR!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          You rang?

  12. Don Rebarchak says:
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    Bring Back Pluto – Interested indeed as this will be my second dynasty league team for 2018.
    Please consider my inquiry. In in for the long haul. Thanks, ol’ School

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