In our 2012 fantasy baseball rankings, we’ve gone over so many flippin’ players I’ve lost track. This is, I believe, the top 60 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball, but you’re best to check the title to be sure. If it is indeed the top 60 starters, then you’re in luck. Only a few more top 20 rankings posts. What is it, February? March? Why don’t I have an app for this? Or do I want a hashtag? App ‘n Hashtag would be a good name for a 50’s style diner with wifi. As with the other rankings posts, tiers and my projections are mentioned. Anyway, here’s the top 60 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball:
41. Michael Pineda – This tier started in the top 40 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball. This tier ends at Wainwright. I called this tier, “Might be fine, won’t be fine on my teams.” I had already went over my Michael Pineda 2012 fantasy. That was before the trade to the Yankees when I was still eating some serious M-Pineda’s. His projections then were 12-10/3.40/1.10/195. I had him originally ranked 19th overall for all starters. Now in The House They Built Across The Street From The House That Ruth Built, I’m slightly worried. Much has been said about his Home/Away splits. After the Montero/Pineda trade, some of it was said here. He’s young so there’s plenty of time to see how well he adjusts. For now, I’m going to let someone else take the chance on him. What it really comes down to is it’s not very difficult to find solid starters, so there’s no reason to take unnecessary risk. 2012 Projections: 14-9/3.75/1.15/180
42. Adam Wainwright – The notes coming out of Spring Training can talk about how Wainwright did Tommy John surgery like Jon Stewart did Tucker Carlson. Won’t matter to me. I’m not going anywhere near him. Someone would have to don a mustache and feathered hair wig and impersonate me in order for him to show up on any of my teams. 2012 Projections: 12-7/3.75/1.28/140 in 160 innings
43. Roy Oswalt – UPDATE: I wouldn’t draft Oswalt on any team now that he says he won’t play until midseason. You can’t afford to roster a guy for more than half a season who you can’t even DL. As of right now, it looks like Oswalt will sign with the Red Sox, which would make the most sense for both. The Red Sox need a starter and Oswalt needs overalls and a tractor which the Red Sox would help pay for cause they need a starter. See, both are happy. Oswalt pitched well enough in the bandbox called Citizens Flank so I wouldn’t be worried about him in Fenway. At this point in his career, he is who he is no matter where he plays. 2012 Projections: 14-10/3.65/1.22/140
44. Jhoulys Chacin – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Garcia. I call this tier, “Guys that no one seems that excited about that I’ll draft.” We’re solidly in the class of pitchers here that will probably be a solid number 3, which usually stands for the vomit you have while you’re crapping, but in this case it’s a fantasy pitcher that doesn’t compete for the Cy Young but can anchor your staff like a metal piercing. As for Chacin, I think there’s an outside chance we get a number one starter out of him and I almost ranked him in the top 40 starter post. What ended up having me rank him here instead is threefold. First fold, his walks can be a bit obnoxious. Two fold, his K-rate dropped last year. Three fold, whoever heard of a three fold? Do they have a threefold on your planet? If Chacin can regain his K-rate and just reduce his walks by one per nine innings, you have yourself a top 20 starter. All aboard! Actually, all excited! 2012 Projections: 12-10/3.60/1.26/175
45. Trevor Cahill – When he went to the Diamondbacks, I said, “Even if his new ballpark is slightly more favorable for hitters, he’s got a solid sinker and he’s going to be facing the Giants, Padres and Dodgers, the Moe, Larry and Curly of lineups. I didn’t like Cahill at all the last two years, but I’m willing to reevaluate. I’m not stubborn. *through clenched teeth* Fine, he looks draftable now!” And that’s me quoting me! 2012 Projections: 12-10/3.60/1.35/160
46. Jaime Garcia – You want another thing this tier could be called? Fantasy starters that should be around a 3.50 ERA, but aren’t going to strike out 200 guys. After I said I didn’t like Wainwright or Carpenter, I was getting letters from the Vatican that I had something against Cardinals. See, I like Jaime Garcia, so it’s not a Jew thing. Though Dave Dinkins might think there’s some truth to the conspiracy since now I’m just liking a “Hymie.” 2012 Projections: 11-9/3.65/1.30/160
47. Neftali Feliz – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Holland. I call this tier, “I have problems with Ranger starters.” Arlington is basically the AL version of Coors and I’m not getting involved in that shizz. Here’s what I said earlier in the offseason when it was announced Feliz would start, “His K-rate last year was a huge shambles or Suge Hambles if you roll with rap impresarios who are into spoonerisms. I’m not sure how a closer could even have a K-rate of 7.80 with Feliz’s stuff. I’m not just saying that to sound stupid, though it probably doesn’t hurt. His fastball, curve and change were all the same velocity as previous years. He added in a slider, but adding that shouldn’t have killed his shizz. Hitters were just making good contact, or, at least, better contact and not getting as fooled. His walks also went through the roof. I mean, 30 walks and 54 Ks in 62 1/3 innings is terrible. Who are you, Kevin Gregg? But as we know from Dempster and C.J. Wilson’s transition to being a starter, Feliz is probably going to have the best year of his young career. I’ll be on the outside looking in though, feels like too much risk to me.” And that’s me quoting me! 2012 Projections: 10-6/3.55/1.20/95 in 120 innings
48. Colby Lewis – Last year he proved fresh off the bloat shouldn’t be restricted to Asians. His K-rate and ground ball rate went down and his fly balls went up. In Arlington, that’s basically standing on the balcony with coke on your nose, firing a machine gun at dozens of people who are firing back. Ron Washington, “Must we mention coke?” Lewis’s ERA ballooned to 4.40 and he was shot. This year? He’ll be slightly better, but I see no reason to stick my neck out for him. He’s a pig that don’t fly straight. 2012 Projections: 14-11/4.00/1.20/180
49. Derek Holland – Holland is an interesting name in this tier. Post All-Star break he had an ERA of 3.06 while pre-All-Star break was only 4.68. Shows you that there’s some good Holland days and some bad Holland days, usually because of the whisking of the eggs. I’m not convinced that he’s going to give you those post-All-Star break stats over the full year. His September BABIP was .211, which helped give him a 2.20 ERA and bolster his 2nd half stats. If he’s around late enough, I could see possibly gambling on him, but my pitchers I drafted before him will have to be less risky. 2012 Projections: 13-8/4.00/1.32/180
50. Justin Masterson – This is a new tier. This tier goes from here until Hellickson. I call this tier, “They got lucky last year. If you draft one this year, you’re pressing your luck and may get whammied.” Most of the guys in this tier are ranked below where I saw them in most mocks and other ‘pert rankings. If you see one of these pitchers going lower than I have them ranked, then you might want to gamble on one but they are due for a regression. To put that more succinctly, I’d try to avoid these guys. To put that even more succinctly, try to avoid. Even more succinctly, avoid. Most succinctly, av–. Masterson had a 6.58 K/9 last year with a 3.64 xFIP. Not terrible marks. He gets a lot of ground balls, which is good, but, if he has just a bit of bad luck with those, his ERA is going to look ugly. Worth avoiding on that risk. 2012 Projections: 10-10/3.85/1.32/160
51. Tim Hudson – For full disclosure purposes — or porpoises, if you live in the sea — Hudson was originally ranked with Oswalt, but news just came out recently that Hudson may miss all of April due to his offseason back surgery. If Hudson were younger, I’d consider an earlier timetable that says he could be back mid-April, but there’s no reason to take on an older pitcher who’s already hurting. 2012 Projections: 11-9/3.65/1.18/120
52. Doug Fister – His walks… His BABIP… His men left on base… His homers allowed… His uncanny ability to sing Kyrie from memory whenever someone calls him Mr. Fister…. They are all too good to be true. I don’t think Fister will be unusable, but I also don’t think he’ll be a top 40 starter as most ‘perts have him. 2012 Projections: 12-10/3.85/1.18/140
53. Ervin Santana – He improved his walk and K-rate last year, but also got a bit lucky with his BABIP. He’s a tough one to call. He’ll either be a 3.75 ERA guy with around 180 Ks and 15+ wins, or he’ll be a 4-something ERA that just frustrates you from start to start. I think it’s going to be more of the latter, if latter means the 2nd one. Last year he threw a lot of sliders — more than anyone in the league and that’s reason enough to let someone else look to Ervin for magic. 2012 Projections: 12-12/4.00/1.30/170
54. Jair Jurrjens – If you’ve read this site for a minute (which is actually a long time if you go by the urbandictionary definition), you know how I feel about Jar-Jar. You are just as likely to get his 2010 stats (4.64 ERA) as you are getting his 2011 (2.96 ERA). Actually, that’s not true. The stats say you should get a 4-something ERA every time out. If you’re feeling lucky, then play the lottery and then go wash that Jurrjens right outta your fantasy team crosshairs. 2012 Projections: 11-9/4.15/1.35/100
55. Clay Buchholz – For any full season (which is very rare for Buchholz), he’s yet to have an xFIP under 4. <sarcastic>Yay.</sarcastic> He’s yet to have a K-rate over 7. <sarcastic>Yippee.</sarcastic> His walk rate for his major league career is 3.72. <sarcastic>Terrific.</sarcastic> 2012 Projections: 10-6/4.25/1.30/125
56. Jeremy Hellickson – I saw Hellickson ranked around 30-ish overall for starters at other sites so I feel like I’m comfortable telling you to ignore him this late. For some reason if he’s still around when you get this low into your draft, ignore him further. Don’t go near him. I’m not saying this because I was accused in the comments at the top 10 for 2012 fantasy baseball of being a Rays fan after my ranking of Longoria. When are people gonna figure out that I don’t care about teams only about players? I’m excited about McCutchen and Alex Presley, I don’t care about the Pirates. I loved me some Matt Kemp last year, hated Andre Ethier. The examples go on and on. Sorry about this totally unfunny rant, but nothing annoys me more than being called bias. I take this non-paying job way too serious! As for Hellickson, his K-rate was 5.57 last year. That’s good…For underhanded softball. His xFIP last year was 4.72. Sidney Ponson called and said stop stealing his xFIP. Hellickson was lucky to not have a 6-something ERA last year. Do not draft. 2012 Projections: 10-9/4.30/1.25/130
57. Jonathan Sanchez – This is a new tier. This tier goes into the top 80 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball. I call this tier, “Holy crap, there were a lot of starters I didn’t like in this post. Let’s see some names I like. Please.” Glad to be outta that last tier that is going to elicit so many comments of this variety, “Why rank Hellickson above Jonathan Sanchez if you’d draft Sanchez and not Hellickson?” Jonathan Sanchez and other names in this tier are coming with a lot of risk. I like them, but I’m not reaching for them until I see some other schmohawk draft Colby Lewis or Fister or Neftali or Hellickson et al (which is not the Israeli airline). My projections for the players in this tier I like may even look better than some of the players above them, but there’s a lot of risk hurdles for these players to jump to get to those projections. For instance, there’s a much better chance Hudson reaches his projections than Sanchez comes anywhere near his. I like these pitchers, but they are flyers. You should know there’s no guarantee with these guys. They may be number two fantasy starters or they may be off your team by April 15th. As for Sanchez, his nickname Filthy Sanchez is perfect for him. It’s filthy as in good and filthy as in bad. He can strike out double digit hitters in a game or he can give up 12 baserunners in 4 innings. A lot of times he gives you both. 2012 Projections: 12-11/3.95/1.35/185
58. Vance Worley – I think his 2011, which was fantastic, is partly due to hitters not being familiar with him. He had a 8+ K/9 and a 3.66 xFIP. Alone those numbers say he was a hotter piece of ass than his mother, Jo Anne Worley, ever was. I think, unfortunately, Worley is a candidate for a sophomore slump. That’s my gut talking though (unless those noises are coming from further south on my body). When the gut talks, you listen or you end up needing an antacid. 2012 Projections: 12-9/3.75/1.27/130
59. Mike Minor – I almost put Julio “The Sheik” Teheran here. Who’s the Braves fifth starter? Can we just draft “Braves fifth starter?” Is that legal? The heat is off Minor to be good and I will love him once again. Last year I told you to draft him in every league, then when the Braves announced Beachy would be in the rotation instead, I told everyone to draft Beachy. Minor? He major. Nothing wrong with the stuff. If anything, he’s a year older (24) and can have a huge breakout. Last year he threw over a 180 IP between the Braves and Triple-A, so if he pitches well, he might just throw 200 innings. Yeah, there will be more mention of him this preseason. 2012 Projections: 10-8/3.65/1.28/170 (<–optimistic, but whatevs)
60. Wandy Rodriguez – He’s exactly the pitcher he was last year (3.49 ERA, 1.31 WHIP, 166 Ks), plus or minus .20 in ERA and 20 Ks. He’s more or less overlooked because he’s on the Astros (shoot, people who work for the Astros overlook them) and he has little to no upside. Will his numbers be better than Worley? Prolly. Would I draft Worley first? Prolly. There’s something to be said for upside. If you’re not excited for your team in March, how excited will you be in June? Look at February Grey getting philosophical! I’m one upping Socrates. I’m Mo’crates! That might just be my rapper name too. Yo, mo’ money, Mo’Crates! Mo’ money, Mo’Crates! Mo’ money, Mo’Crates! I drink cream soda and I rock a toga! King Minos got a powerful navy, and, yo, my beard and hair is wavy! Try and read about me from Plato and your head will turn to mush… Nah, gravy! Mo’ money, Mo’Crates! 2012 Projections: 10-10/3.65/1.30/170
