How much does the Rangers giving up Yu Darvish for Willie Calhoun play into their wont to play Calhoun? Bigly, not bigly yet, bigly soon, or, like a chicken piccata’s side, big leek. Therein lies the sun, moon, and stars of Willie Calhoun’s value for 2018 fantasy baseball. My thoughts on this is you don’t trade a guy that is the face of your franchise like Yu for a guy who’s not going to play, but — and this is a Kardashian-sized but — Darvish was due to be a free agent, so maybe it doesn’t matter. How’s that for landing on one side or the other? Honestly, I don’t know, but the Rangers need to move towards the future and their outfield has room for Calhoun. Why does any of this matter? Cause Calhoun’s so butter I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter can’t tell the difference between him and butter, and I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter’s “butter or not butter” radar is as fine-tuned as you’re going to find. So, let’s speak on him as if playing time is all but assured. So, what can we expect from Willie Calhoun for 2018 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
I debated Victor Robles or Ronald Acuna for my number one rookie for 2018. It was quite heated debate that one bystander claimed, “Are you talking to me or yourself?” And another bystander said, “Are you asking for the directions to Paso Robles?” Those people don’t know obviously about the juicy rookies that I speak of, and don’t end a sentence with of — dah! By the way, don’t ever say “…that I speak of” in real life, or you will likely get punched. Any hoo! Victor Robles was called up for a cup of coffee this past year, which, I guess, made Dusty Baker a barista. Would’ve taken Baker more for a pastry guy. Let’s get to the elephant in the room first, or if you’re a college freshman and the word elephant upsets you, let’s address the large mammal in the free-range zoo. Robles was called up, Werth and Taylor may leave this offseason, and Robles is ready. Those are all points in his favor for playing time. Against him is we don’t know how the new manager in Washington is going to use him. Will Robles be used more than he would’ve been with the toothpicked barista? Hard to say. I’ll get to my projections below, but Trea played, Taylor played, I think Robles can play in 2018. Maybe at least two-thirds of the time. Anyway, what can we expect from Victor Robles for 2018 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ayo whaddup, it’s ya boy Grey Albright aka the Fantasy Master Lothario aka White Chocolate aka The Ladder You Use To Reach New Heights aka The God Particle aka Trump’s Next Supreme Court Nominee Judge Reinhold aka Paid Overtime aka A Close Parking Spot When You’re In A Rush aka Al Swearengen’s Swearing Dictionary aka Teacher, We Don’t Need No Education aka The Weird Guy That Latches Onto The Main Character In Oscar Films I Think His Name Is Paul Dano aka The Butcher, The Baker and The Candlestick Maker aka The Stinging On Your Pinkie Toe When You Clip Too Close aka Paul Anka aka Forget How You Spell My Name And Just Get Me My Coffee! I just spent thirty minutes looking up Mindy Cohn and whether or not she’s a lesbian. Ah, the offseason. You are a soothing mistress that touches my naughty bits with idle hands. She’s apparently not a lesbian, but a confirmed friend of the gays, and she wanted to lose weight in the 80’s, but the producers asked her to avoid it for the character of Natalie. They finally agreed to let her wear baggy clothes. No comment, except the “no comment” comment has the weight of a thousand eye rolls. A quick preamble about the 2018 fantasy baseball rookie series that is coming from me over the next few weeks. Rookies could get a post if they meet MLB eligibility requirements, less than 130 ABs or 50 IP. That means no Yoan Moncada, no Rhys Hoskins, no Rafael Devers, and finally no Amed Rosario. In 2012, the first player I highlighted was Mike Trout. That wasn’t an accident. I said in the Mike Trout post, “He’s ranked number one for me. Numero uno. The Big Mahoff. He’s the big Statue of Liberty in New York, not that girly one in Paris!” Since then, I’ve attempted to make the first rookie post about a prospect that will be the top rookie for fantasy the following year. Two years ago, that honor went to Corey Seager. Yes, it’s an honor, don’t be so condescending. Last year, it was Yoan Moncada. (But the 2nd rookie post was Aaron Judge! If this were horseshoes, I’d be so money.) This year the top fantasy prospect isn’t no ordinary man, this is the prospect I be seeing in my sleep. Ronald Acuna will be your number one 2018 fantasy baseball rookie. Will Acuna be named to the All-Century Team in 85 years or edged out by a robot with grabby hands named the Hitter-Tron that my great-great-nephew will sue due to trademark infringement only to find out it’s the same Hitter-Tron that once graced this little fantasy baseball blog called Razzball? Can Acuna be a top ten outfielder in 2018? So many questions and so little time to look up Mindy Cohn info! Anyway, what can we expect of Ronald Acuna for 2018 fantasy baseball?Please, blog, may I have some more?
So, how’s everyone holding up without baseball every day? I don’t know what to do with myself! Yesterday I wandered into a Starbucks and told the coffeerista about Marcus Stroman for 2018. Then I sobbed into a cheddar scone until someone asked me to leave. We’ve gone over the final 2017 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters and the top 20 starters. This is different than Final Fantasy rankings where you rank Final Fantasy 1 thru Final Fantasy 15. That’s hardcore nerd shizz! This is simply fantasy baseball, we’re softcore nerds like Emmanuelle is to porn. So, there’s no more of these godforsaken recap posts left. You’re welcome. I, my over-the-internet friend, will be talking next about 2018 rookies. Anyway, here’s the top 40 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
All the final 2017 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters are done. For those that skipped today’s title, this starts the top 20 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball. This is NOT for 2018 (caps for those who can’t read titles; supposedly it’s easier to read caps, I have my doubts). This is a recap. Will these affect next year’s rankings? Sure. But not entirely. To recapitulate, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. We’re (me’re) using it to fairly gauge our (my) preseason rankings. Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the top 40 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball, we’ve finished all the hitter recaps. We meaning me, but I’ll include you. No, that’s not a cue to try to hold my hand. Why are you now patting my butt? Don’t muss my hair! The pitching recap will begin next. You can hardly wait. No, you! To recap, the end of the season rankings are based on our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. I felt the easiest way to keep it objective would to go this route. This way when I say someone finished 30th and I ranked them 23rd in the preseason, it carries more weight like a non-vegan Bill Clinton. Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Went over the catchers, 1st basemen, 2nd basemen and shortstops and top 20 3rd basemen for 2017 fantasy baseball. Guess what’s next! No, not pitchers. Read the title, man. In 2010, there were only 5 outfielders that hit 30 homers, in 2011 there were 9, 14 in 2012, in 2013 there were 3, a small bounce back with 6 in 2014, eight in 2015. Last year, 11 outfielders hit 30 homers. This year…DRUM ROLL!….15 outfielders hit 30 homers. Obvious trend. As for steals, there were 14 outfielders who stole 30 bases in 2012, 10 in 2013, 11 in 2014, five in 2015 and seven in 2016. This year: two (!) outfielders stole 30 (Hamilton and Maybin) and only six players overall. So, how about that power, huh? As before, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. Anyway, here’s the top 20 outfielders for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
For those looking for pictures of ballplayers taking off their ballcap and recapping themselves, you’re in the wrong place! Something I’ve noticed from recapping each position is not every hitting position was deep. Outfielders? Crazy deep. 1st basemen? Deep, dawg. 2nd basemen? Not bad. Shortstops? Awful. 3rd basemen? I’ve seen better. Travis Shaw was the 8th best 1st baseman, here he’s 4th. Yeah, not that deep. Scooter was the 9th best 2nd baseman, here he’s 8th. Okay, 3rd basemen suck. This recap ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked players in the preseason. Now, let’s get this, young money. Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Here’s what I said last year, “We’re gonna find out if the top 20 shortstops are as Ken Bonerific as the top 20 2nd basemen. Hint: they are. Damn, I gotta work on building suspense. That hint pretty much gives the whole kit away and tacks the kaboodle onto its back as it’s walking out the door. Goodbye, kit and kaboodle, I just gave you away for nothing.” And that’s me quoting me! This year? Not so much. Without further Machado, to recap, this final ranking is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
We already went over the top 20 catchers and the top 20 1st basemen for 2017 fantasy baseball. Today, we dip our big toe into the top 20 2nd basemen pool. Weird year for the 2nd basemen. They had a huge bounce back last year, but this year a bunch of guys got old or just disappointed: Kinsler, Carpenter, Kipnis and Zobrist. And that’s only naming the Jews and Gentiles. (I’m putting Carpenter in both camps.) To recap this crap (rhyme points!), this final ranking for last year is from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2017 fantasy baseball and how they compared to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?