A.J. Griffin‘s initials stand for Alfredo Jettuccine. ¬†Fact! ¬†At this point, I’d own all A’s pitchers. ¬†It’s Moneyball II, starring Don Swayze and the daughter is played by a dwarf. ¬†What, it’s straight-to-video, and the video is VHS because Don Swayze’s fans keep it real. ¬†Alfredo Jettuccine looked like a mediOAKer, and you needed to be three screws short of an Ikea desk to start him in away games. ¬†But, if you were a cyclops with a monocle, you saw his minor league numbers could mean more. ¬†His K-rate in Double-A this year was a thing of beauty (9+) and moving to Triple-A he only dropped to a 7+. ¬†This is coupled with a fantastic walk rate (under two at both stops). ¬†He’ll probably never be a number one. ¬†Shoot, he may not be a number 4, but a guy that can keep his walks in check with a 7 K-rate needs to be unlucky to get completely pounded. ¬†To give you a name of a pitcher that has around a 7 K-rate and a nice walk rate: ¬†Johnny Cueto, and he pitches in a hitters’ park. ¬†In O.co (is that pronounced like Yoko?), Griffin’s a pickup in almost all mixed leagues. ¬†¬†Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Wilton Lopez – The weird thing is I don’t think the Astros made a bad decision going with Francisco Cordero. ¬†I think they made the stereotypical bad management decision. ¬†How many times do we hear, “He has closer experience?” ¬†No one seems to bother to look at whether or not that experience is any good. ¬†Clubs should hire someone to look past how many saves a closer has to look at their ERA and WHIP. ¬†Sounds like a simple enough job, but obviously it trips up clubs that spend tens of millions of dollars. ¬†I try to make sure I don’t have too many tighpos and we’re a thousand of pennies organization.
Sergio Romo – Even if he doesn’t get saves, have you seen his ratios? ¬†0.60 ERA, 0.73 WHIP. ¬†He kinda should be owned everywhere with or without saves, which was a song off Matthew Berry’s 3rd album, “It’s Not A Bald Spot; It’s A Solar Panel For Megan Fox References.”
John Axford – This made me laugh for some reason. ¬†CBS Sports’ blurb about Dor-K was, “He’s not closing anything.” ¬†Ha! ¬†You don’t say? ¬†The guy on Project Runway who’s from Belarus, I think his name is Balki Bartokomous, could’ve told you that.
Zach McAllister – For s’s and g’s, let’s see when I told you to pick him up: ¬†June 26th. ¬†He’s now at 11% owned in ESPN leagues after a month of solid starts. ¬†45% of ESPN are abandoned, 15% of ESPN leagues are actively managed but by people following ESPN’s ‘pert advice and 20% of ESPN leagues are owned by monkeys in the Congo as a sick laboratory experiment by Justin Morneau’s father, Dr. Morneau. ¬†That means McAllister is actually owned in 102% of leagues, so ignore this.
Paul Maholm – If starters were gold chains, this week’s Buy would be Mr. T. ¬†On June 29th, he threw a 8 1/3 IP, 0 ER gem. ¬†Since then, 37 1/3 IP, 4 ER. ¬†For reals, or as my Vietnamese friends would say, “Pho reals.”
Mike Minor – He still looks far from dazzling. ¬†In fact, his ERA looks zaddling, which is the exact opposite of dazzling. ¬†Start using it; it’s a real word. ¬†He has strung together three straight solid starts and he’s got more upside than a St. Bernard¬†with human hands as created by Dr. Morneau. ¬†He’s a mad genius!
Neftali Feliz – He’s almost set to return as a starter and the Rangers need him. ¬†Weird that his ownership numbers are so low, since everyone drafted him this year and he still has a 3.16 ERA. ¬†But what do I know? ¬†I’m just a poor ‘pert nobody loves me…He’s just a poor ‘pert from a poor family!
Ross Detwiler – I swear, I feel like I’ve been telling you to pick him up since May. ¬†Granted, he lost a rotation spot for like a minute (not an Urbandictionary minute, which is actually a long time). ¬†Detwiler has a 3.01 ERA in 92 2/3 IP.
Jeff Samardzija – I understand your hesitation with picking him up. ¬†Lousy team and at any moment he feels like he could drop a nine earned run game while accidentally running over your Gam-Gam. ¬†His upside makes the gamble worth it, if you need Ks.
Ryan Roberts – This is a very tentative Buy. ¬†If his first half of last year was an¬†algebraic equation, he’s proofed it was a fluke. ¬†The preceding was written by someone who used to do their math homework by looking at the answers in the back of the book.
Todd Frazier – .283 average, 27 runs, 33 RBIs and 10 homers in 223 ABs and the everyday job. ¬†Now that I have that out of the way, I’ve had him on a team for 55 ABs and I have 3 runs, 3 RBIs, 0 homers and a .255 average, and I just got 2 runs and 2 RBIs three days ago. ¬†Honestly, I’m not even sure how it’s mathematical possible my Frazier numbers are so bad. ¬†Yeah, I really know how to sell a Buy.
Eric Chavez – While A-Rod’s out, Chavez will see the majority of at-bats unless the Yankees trade for someone. ¬†That’s all the positive I have to say on him, and that was enough for a bunch of AL-Only’ers to get excited.
Jayson Werth – He’s due back on Tuesday. ¬†What’s that Werth to you? ¬†Hahahahahaha… Breath, Grey, breath! ¬†It wasn’t that funny. ¬†You’re right, Random Italicized Voice. ¬†Sorry. ¬†But it’s gotta be Werth something! ¬†Hahahahahaha… ¬†I’m going to take a nap.
Coco Crisp – He’s hitting near .360 in July, 13 steals in June and July with 5 homers. ¬†Will the real Krispie please stand up…Please stand up…Please stand up.
Travis Snider – Great upside for power and, if you own Travis Blackley, you can change your team name to The Travi Fountain and seem all cultured and shizz.
Carlos Gomez – He’s really terrible at this thing called baseball, but he’s currently hitting and has a tad bit of power and good speed. ¬†BTW, you ever went to call him Chuck Vamos? ¬†Eh, probably me.
Roger Bernadina – I haven’t given him much pub recently even though he has been hitting and starting (over .450 in the last week with two steals). ¬†That’s the good news. ¬†The bad news is Werth is due back on Tuesday. ¬†The Jason Mewes is calling Kevin Smith asking him to make another movie so he’s got something to do.
Ryan Theriot – Member last week when I said Theriot usually stays hot for about a week? ¬†Emphasize ‘week’ or make it ten days. ¬†Your call!
Josh Rutledge – He’s still hitting over .350 and the Rockies are headed home for the next ten days. ¬†Coors + Hot Weather = Craig Robinson wearing water wings. ¬†Wow, my math is way off there, but I’d grab Rutledge.
Jered Weaver – I almost didn’t write this Sell. ¬†First, I’m not telling anyone to sell him for, say, Latos and Danny Espinosa. ¬†As someone probably told Jonathan Lipnicki and he adopted it as a mantra for his adult life, don’t get too cute with yourself. ¬†Weaver is an ace, i.e., a number one fantasy starter, I before E except in Teixeira, he shouldn’t be sold like he’s got the gout. ¬†He does have some peripherals that show red flags. ¬†His K-rate is his lowest since his rookie year and below a 7. ¬†That’s not great. ¬†His xFIP is 3.98, which is not good either, but last year he had a 3.80, so not completely unprecedented. ¬†His FIP puts him in the company of Dempster, Jarrod Parker and Anibal Sanchez. ¬†Guys that are probably considered way below him on the food chain (and, with his trade, I do think Anibal is below him by a lot). ¬†If you throw out his Win-Loss record, he’s pitching around the same as Jordan Zimmermann. ¬†Guys who are above him that may not seem it are Greinke, Cliff Lee, Felix Hernandez and David Price. ¬†Again, don’t trade Weaver for a napkin once used by¬†Shia LaDouche, but I’d explore options.