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‘The willies’ as defined by Oxford English Dictionary is a fearful uneasiness of the guy on your street corner that wears a recyclable shopping bag for a shirt and tells you you’re going to hell.  2nd definition, fearful uneasiness of owning Pirate hitters in fantasy.  We’ll be dealing with the 2nd definition; you’re on your own with the first one.  Should all Pirate hitters give us the willies?  No willies on The Dread Pirate.  Robot Jones — occasional willies.  Neil Walker — no willies for his position.  Jose Tabata — no willies, but worried about willies for next year.  Pedro Alvarez — some willies now, no future willies.  There’s going to be a Pedro Alvarez sleeper post for 2011.  I’m telling you now because, if you go into hibernation for five months and rub the crusties out of your eyes to see a Pedro Alvarez sleeper post in 2011, I want you to know I have not been talking about Alvarez for the last five months, it’ll only feel like that to you.  Phew, was the longest run-on sentence ever or what?  I blame Strunk & White.  So what makes Pedro Alvarez a fantasy baseball keeper for 2011?

Here’s ten reasons:  1)  I’m assuming you have him for cheap. 2) His position.  3) In 2008, Alvarez was the number two overall pick in the Major League Draft.  The pedigree is there.  This year he ranked as the 8th-best prospect, according to Baseball America, which is a superpower of prospect rankings that is currently in an extended conflict with Baseball Iraq.  This high ranking came after Alvarez hit 27 homers in 126 games between Single and Double-A.  4)  His only real caveat are his splits.  He struggles vs. lefties.  He’s young (23) and it’s not a big enough warning sign to back off him.  5) Golden rings.  6) The Pirates are committed to him and are already batting in a solid run-producing spot in the order.  7) He’s in no danger of losing playing time, which is kinda similar to point 6, but we’re trying to get to 10, so go with it.  8)  Another caveat, his Ks are a bit murderous, but he’s always been a free swinger like that creepy guy on Craigslist.  Can’t really fault a guy for doing what he’s always done while still succeeding.  You’re not taking him in the first round with his Ks (yet), you’re keeping him late.  9) Was a terrible movie.  10) Next year, he’s going to have his ups and downs, but he could breakout and be a top 3rd baseman by 2012.  Next year, you’re looking at a cheap 25-30 homer hitter at 3rd base with a wonky average.  If Alvarez gets lucky on average, you could have a top 5 3rd baseman in 2011.

  1. ThE sHiT says:
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    Nice post, will keep the Smashbuckler in mind. So, I asked about Volquez because I’m looking at streaming options for the rest of the week. The available guys are:
    Volquez vs ARI
    Kennedy @ PIT
    Blanton vs. WAS
    C. Lewis vs. DET
    C.J. Wilson @ SEA
    Blackburn vs OAK
    Anibal vs CHC
    Narveson @ SF
    Carrasco @ KC
    Minor vs. WAS
    J. McD vs ARI
    Chacin @ LAD

    Yes, I know there are a lot of options. Pick the best 3 please. Thx! Oh, and good morning!

  2. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @ThE sHiT: Good morning! Kennedy, Blanton, Wilson…

  3. Wilsonian says:
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    Mr. Grey, sir, who is the better start for tomorrow:

    Big Z @ STL v. Carpenter
    Duensing @ CWS v. Floyd?

  4. Eddy says:
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    @Grey:
    Man, since making my league into a keeper for next year I’ve had so many headaches deciding not only who I’m going to keep, but how I’m going to draft next year for keepers seeing as I won’t keep miggy and wright for 2012. What round do you see him going in a 12 team h2h keeper Grey?

  5. Frank says:
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    If you’re slightly ahead of your IP pace, would you start Jurrjens at home vs WAS (L Hernandez)?

    Matchup looks good (opposing Livan, primarily) to me, but JJ likes to poop the bed a little too often…

  6. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Wilsonian: Z…

    @Eddy: Who? Alvarez? Near the 10th round.

    @Frank: I’d sit him.

  7. Wilsonian says:
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    @Grey: muchos gracias…that’s the route I took.

  8. Shmorgie S. Board says:
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    BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS BRETT MYERS!!!

  9. struggler says:
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    Hannrahanan or Sale for next Monday and on?

  10. struggler says:
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    the other option is to drop Baker and hold them both till Monday.

    PIT is vs STL, vs HOU, @STL, @FLA
    CWS is @OAK, @LAA, vs BOS, vs CLE

  11. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @struggler: Depends how badly you need saves.

  12. struggler says:
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    True – I stack up pretty well to all the other teams in the playoffs. I’ll stand pat with Hanny and await further instruction. Thanks!

  13. El Famous Burrito says:
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    This is the first pirate fantasy I’ve read that didn’t involve wenches or scurvy.

  14. Mike says:
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    Wait, are you saying Nine was a bad movie or 9 was a bad movie, or both? I thought Nine looked awful but 9 looked rad (yes I’m from California, why do you ask?) but if Grey says 9 was bad then I’m going to have to start wondering if 9 was as bad as Nine looked.

  15. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @struggler: No problem.

    @El Famous Burrito: Willies third definition is name short for possessive of One-Eyed Willie, who was a pirate.

    @Mike: Meant Nine, never saw 9.

  16. JackInTheBox says:
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    @Grey: H2H league…are you scared to start any of these guys?

    Garza, Hudson, Wood?

  17. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Grey: U starting Garza right?

  18. Wilsonian says:
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    @Grey: good work on a reference to one of the greatest movies of all time.

  19. Wilsonian says:
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    @Grey: anytime! I heard rumors of Goonies 2, with all of the original surviving cast on board. I’m excited, yet at the same time a little worried. I don’t want anything to tarnish my childhood memories of that movie.

  20. JackInTheBox says:
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    @Grey: Wait, I should have phrased that question better….so you’d start all of them?

  21. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Wilsonian: Probably end up like The Karate Kid where I don’t see it so it doesn’t taint anything.

    @JackInTheBox: Yup

  22. JackInTheBox says:
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    @Grey: Alright, thanks. I was wavering on Garza and Hudson, so thanks for input.

  23. Mateo says:
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    Grey, start danks vs minn? hudson at cin? Jair vs Was? H2H league, I just need a good outting.

  24. Nuke LaDouche says:
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    @Grey: I’m 1 point out of first and trying to scrap for anything. HRs, Runs, Average, and RBIs are all within striking distance. Would you drop LaRoche who has sucked lately for Berkman who has been fairly hot? Panda is also on the WW but he has sucked hard. Thanks for the help.

  25. Steve says:
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    Pujols out of the lineup tonight.

    Boooo! for my RCL team.

    Yay! My H2H opponent has him.

  26. CoreyII says:
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    I see Kinsler is suspended one game – anyone have advanced word whether he is out tonight or appealing? I’d love to find out before the early games so i know if i should bench him before those guys are locked onto the bench.

  27. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: The ol’ double edged sword.

  28. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @CoreyII: No idea if it’s tonight.

  29. Steve says:
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    @Grey: You know it. I have a lot of my hitters going against my pitchers across my various teams.

    I’d be surprised if it ended well.

  30. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Yeah, I usually hope for good pitching and terrible hitting. Easier to bounce back from that.

  31. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Nice approach.

    KJ taking a seat tonight too.

  32. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Damn, that’s annoying.

  33. Steve says:
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    @Steve: And Montero…

  34. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Don’t have him, so that’s okay.

  35. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Every Garza inning looking like an adventure at this stage.

  36. Steve says:
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    @Steve: But it won’t have a happy ending…

  37. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Steve: I have convinced myself that if I watch Garza pitch, I jinx him. So, I changed the channel after Cano’s HR. Hopefully the Rays can put some runs on the board…

  38. Steve says:
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    @ThE sHiT: Hopefully he can stay out there a while and sweep up after himself a little bit.

  39. BSA says:
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    @Steve: Lets go Holland – and just like that its ugly.

  40. Steve says:
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    @BSA: Between the RCL, my H2H (playoff semifinal) and the Hippo/Al K keeper league (0.5 out of first), there is nothing good that happens on one team that does not adversely affact me on another.

  41. BSA says:
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    @Steve: That leaves me with an image of you watching the games either comatosed reaction or jumping up and then saying “shit!”.

  42. Steve says:
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    @BSA: I’m at work, so neither would be appropriate. But if you’re talking about my inward disposition, you’re spot on.

  43. BSA says:
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    @Steve: You should write a Razzball Column – “How to Build an Ulcer”

  44. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Steve: Yeah 7 IP would be good.

  45. Steve says:
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    @ThE sHiT: Not holding my breath.

  46. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @BSA: Ha!

    @Steve: Yeah, kinda figured this wasn’t gonna be a great start for him. Bleh.

  47. Steve says:
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    @BSA: So many guys caught stealing or picked off the last few days, should have passed you in SB by now.

  48. Steve says:
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    Et tu Hammel? Noooo!

  49. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Dammit.

  50. BSA says:
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    @Steve: Hey who is that? Oh its just Brian and the dogs of summer treading water.

    Shoulda coulda woulda. And I should have 8 extra wins right now with the starters I am rolling out there. Too bad so sad!

  51. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Wow. That could have been MUCH worse.

    @BSA: Don’t make me come over there.

  52. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Yeah, small consolation.

  53. BSA says:
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    @Steve: I have a Sam Adams on ice! That and a screaming 6 year old and leftovers in the microwave. You’ll be right at home.

  54. BSA says:
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    Why the hell can’t Wainwright pitch this month? Did I miss something here?

  55. Steve says:
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    @BSA: Well, when you put it like that…

    Home alone?

  56. BSA says:
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    @Steve: Nope wife is upstairs managing the screamer. :) priorities!

  57. Steve says:
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    OK – I can’t say that my humour is improved by what’s going on in Tampa right now.

  58. BSA says:
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    Wainwright just sucks! Holland is my streamer and Wainwright is shittin’ the bed. C’mon!

  59. naughtandcross says:
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    So Gio Gonzalez doesn’t realize its fantasy playoff time does he?

  60. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I thnk Hammel might find things easier if he didn’t repeatedly let the pitcher – the pitcher! – get on base.

  61. Steve says:
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    @Steve: ***hole.

  62. Steve says:
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    WTF is Gutierrez doing?

  63. Steve says:
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    @Steve: Closing it our, that’s what.

    Phew.

  64. Elijah says:
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    My pitching getting it done…Who needs Josh Johnson, I got Dan Hudson?! In any case, moving on to the HtH finals looks likely, and I’ll get home field.

  65. Elijah says:
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    Oh and go Hamels!

  66. Steve says:
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    @Elijah: Shhh!

  67. DrEasy says:
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    Shame on me for doubting Dan Hudson against the Reds. Sonavabench!

  68. Steve says:
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    @Grey: At least Hamels, Hudson and Norris picked up his and Garza’s slack.

  69. VinWins

    VinWins says:
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    Great catch by Granderson. Unfortunately I’m already way behind in the “great catch” category.

  70. Steve says:
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    That’s ridiculous.

    My opponent just got a pinch-hit donk from Posada.

  71. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: There should be a way to call BS once a week in H2H. Call BS on one player a week’s performance and it gets taken off the board.

  72. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I like it!

    If I was being fair-minded about this (as if!), I say that was possibly cancelled out by Yuniesky B’s ticker tease.

    And that Holland got taken out after 4…

  73. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: There should be un-BS-ables though, like there’s undroppables in ESPN. You can’t BS Votto, you can BS Betancourt.

  74. BSA says:
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    Oh yeah and Texas sucks too.
    I weather the storm with Holland through 4 innings only to have the team score after he is out.

  75. Steve says:
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    @BSA: You could at least be gracious enough to be thankful that it was only one earned and not four ;-)

    My opponent has him…

  76. Suck My Wieters says:
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    Grey,

    Cant take Scott Rolens shizz anymore… Its playoff time, its time to produce. Who do I pick up to play 3B after I drop this bum?

  77. Suck My Wieters says:
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    Some Guys available….

    Valencia, Betemit, Alex Gordon… About all I can think of right now..

  78. Steve says:
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    Jesus, I’m getting screwed by Figgins and Branyan.

  79. barker says:
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    who to start tommorrow pick 2 to 3 of them please
    10 team league

    sanabia vs phi lannan @ atl bush @ hou drabek @ bal minor vs was

    mejia vs pit bergesen vs tor saunders at cin

    not great options but could use the streams
    much appreciated grey

  80. big o says:
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    @Grey:

    been on the phone for the past hour …. will catch up with comments , later,
    but why was zito taken out , after 5.2 and 82 pitches ?

    also , “golden rings” was totally unexpected and quite amusing .
    HA ! x2

  81. GopherDay says:
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    Kershaw is giving a very un-kershaw like start tonight. 3 hits, no walks, and only 3 ks. I’d be annoyed about the lack of Ks, but Hamels made that up for me tonight.

  82. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Hitting at the wrong time, eh?

    @barker: These are all bad. Drabek and Sanbia.

    @big o: Bochy doesn’t trust him and pulled him, nothing else to it from what I saw.

    @GopherDay: Yeah, still good though.

  83. Steve says:
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    @Grey: It’s not the first time Figgins has done this to me.

    Nice run support for Greinke today. Pity he wasn’t pulled after the fifth.

  84. DrEasy says:
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    @GopherDay: …and he got the win! Pfew, that was nerve-wracking until the very end. Missed out on Dan Hudson’s start, but Kershaw made up for it.

  85. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Yeah, Grienke’s had a season to forget. Not even sure how I ended up with him on a team. I think it was Rudy’s doing. Rudy!

  86. DrEasy says:
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    @DrEasy: Since July 15th, Kershaw has only had wins in games where he didn’t give up a single run. And that means only 3 Ws.

  87. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Price enforcing?

    I traded away Hamels and Bills to get him and Dunn.

  88. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Not a terrible trade if you needed power. Maybe price enforcing, maybe alcohol, not sure.

  89. big o says:
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    @Grey:

    noticed that the little blue “thumbs up”
    jumped about 27 points , in the past 24 hours .
    i interpret that as a good thing .
    but , what , exactly , is that ?
    should i click on it ?
    it’s not one of those twitter things , is it !?

  90. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @big o: It’s just a Facebook thing. If you don’t know what it is, no reason to click on it.

  91. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Got a Holds guy du jour?

  92. Steve says:
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    @Steve: Oh, and Figgins can **** right off.

  93. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Benoit

  94. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Owned, unfortunately.

    Breslow, Romo, Veras and Masset (I own Chapman already) have the most Holds in the last 7 days in my league…

  95. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Romo…

  96. big o says:
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    do you see duensing getting lit up tomorrow ?
    i think i have to sit him .
    kwentin and klowney kwould kill .

  97. shane says:
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    I’m in a keeper league..16 team with each team keeping 6…I have first pick this year..the best available guys are McCann weeks delmon young price grienke and Pedro Alvarez..who would u take?

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