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Let me see if I got this right about Brett Wallace (I’m admittedly drunk from an all-day 4th of July BBQ).  He’s a post-hype-little-less-hype-some-hype-no-hype-hype-what?-hype sleeper.  Did that add up?  Sometimes I forget to carry the last hype and I was doing it in my head.  Wallace arrives with so little hoopla he’s poopla.  Hang up the decorations, prepare for your friends to come over for a potluck, then everyone shows up late with gluten-free snacks.  That’s when you say, “What’s with all of the poopla?”  If I wanted my glutens free, I would’ve freed them myself!  Brett Wallace hit really well down in Triple-A (this last time; and every time really).  11 homers, .326 average and won Triple-A Player of the Month honors, which is like being the world’s tallest midget.  There’s still not a whole lot of proof that Wallace can hit in the majors, but yesterday’s 3-for-5 with two homers was a nice step in the right direction.  I could see grabbing him in deeper leagues for the chance that he finally figures out a way to transform his minor league success to the majors.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jose Veras – Hit by a comebacker like he was at a roast sitting next to Don Rickles, but Bo Porter said it was a bruise and he’ll be fine.  Only Bo Porter said it with some smooth jazz.

Alex Gordon – After colliding with a wall on Wednesday, he’s still hoping to avoid the DL.  Aren’t we all?  The Royals are testing him for a possible concussion and he has a hip contusion.  Maybe he has a concussion and that confusion makes him think he has a contusion.  The Concusstador is contussed!  Luckily, he doesn’t have a lisp or all of this would get really confusing.

Eric Hosmer – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and his 9th homer.  Since I was hatin’ on him as of three weeks ago, it would be slightly disingenuous to point out I wrote a sleeper post in December for him.  If I’m using the word disingenuous correctly.  What a handful that word is!  (Not a mouthful because I’m typing.)  I’m still sincerely excited to see Hosmer finally start to put it together even if he peed on my heart last year like he was a Calvin car sticker.

Lorenzo Cain – 2-for-4, 4 RBIs and his 4th homer.  Has done nothing of note for about two months now, but as long as the baseball diamond has white lines I’ll be touting Cain…Sugar!

Michael Brantley – 4-for-5, 1 run, 1 RBI.  I swear on your deity of choice that every time I drop Brantley he does something that makes me want to pick him back up.  We all have one of these players.  The guy you pick up and drop two dozen times.  We should have a glossary term for this.  Suggest in the comments.  Thanks.

Joey Terdoslavich – Called up as a bench bat for the Braves.  Here’s kinda what Prospect Scott said (I updated it), “Terdoslavich posted an .867 OPS in a full season at High-A in 2011.  In 2012, more of the same.  Then this year, he’s exploded with 18 homers in 85 games and a .318 average.  The Braves are likely to take their time with him as he hasn’t yet settled in defensively.  He projects to hit 20+ homers with a solid AVG in the majors.  If he stinks, though, his name will surely inspire much turd-wordplay.  Or turdplay.  Disgusting.  Don’t play with turds, people!”

Dan Straily – 7 IP, 4 baserunners (1 Hit), 6 Ks vs. the Cubs.  Terrific start, but he’s only guaranteed one more start and it’s on the road in Pittsburgh.  I streamed Straily once this year and he gave my a Freezer Pop of doodie, so I have cold feet, which may be influencing my decision, but I wouldn’t touch him in Armpittsburgh.

Travis Wood – 6 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 5 Ks, 2.69 ERA.  On April 26th, I told you to buy him.  *long drag on a cigarette*  Yup.  *realizing I dropped him from my team six weeks ago, coughing out smoke*  Dah!

Eric Stults – 4 1/3 IP, 4 ER.  What an ugly performance by Stults, but what a tour de force performance by Cher.

Stephen Drew – Hoping to return on Saturday.  I’m sure that will be followed closely by another injury.  He hits every branch down on the Drew Injury Family Tree.

Allen Webster – 6 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 4 Ks.  His ERA is now down to 7.88 and this was against the Padres, so I’d take it with a grain of salt.  Or a few grains of salt, otherwise you’re not gonna be able to taste it.

Jacoby Ellsbury – 3-for-4, 3 runs and his 2nd homer.  Would it be ungrateful to point out how few homers he has when he has so many steals and there’s people starving for steals in some parts of the world?

Jose Iglesias – 2-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI.  The Church of Jose is now hitting .411.  He could be barely hit over .200 in the minors.  What’s going on here?  Is he hitting weak grounders to an infielder then a groundhog is popping his head up and grabbing the ball?

Jonny Gomes – 2-for-4, 1 RBI, which comes a day after a pinch hit homer.  Jonny Cat’s shakin’ the litter box score!  He won’t be in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell, because that shizz is already written, but I’d grab him.  He doesn’t have everyday playing time, so you’ll need to platoon him.

Chris Archer – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners (3 BBs), 5 Ks vs. the Astros.  It’s ironic that his name is Archer since he has terrible aim, if I’m using irony correctly, only the Brits know for sure.  With that said (what was said?), Archer gets the Twins next.

Desmond Jennings – 3-for-6, 1 run.  You know how in the preseason when I’m like a player going 20/20 is the bomb dot rom-com falling in love with a dot org at the end of the year, but living it day-to-day is boring?  Desmond is illustrating that perfectly.

Yunel Escobar – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 3 RBIs.  You ever notice how the letter Y looks like a martini glass?  Hmm, maybe I shouldn’t be writing this after an all-day BBQ boozefest.

Taylor Jordan – 5 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 3 Ks, 2.70 ERA.  He ain’t from Jersey, but Taylor’s going H.A.M.  Or at least lightly grilled pork roll with a side of ratios.  I just went over him and it was the longest blurb in the history of Razzball, so I’m not going to copy and paste the whole thing here, but if you want to read it you click on Jordan’s name then click his 2nd most recent article.  Look at me leading you by the hand.  No relation to Donovan Hand, who actually faced him in this start.  Talk about some-mother-effin’-symmetry!  And, yes, that is the first time in the history of the planet anyone’s ever said some-mother-effin’-symmetry.

Wilson Ramos – 3-for-4, 5 RBIs and his 3rd homer.  The Nats have been getting decent stats out of their catcher platoon, but for fantasy it’s a blahtoon.  Only thing worse than a blahtoon is running into a baboon when you’re dressed as Carmen Miranda.

Ian Desmond – 3-for-4, 2 runs and 2 steals.  Are we all aware how valuable he’s been this year?  On our Player Rater, he’s the third best shortstop.  Seems like he doesn’t get the recognition.  In the words of Pete Townsend, “And if I draft anything evil, put your finger down my throat and remove the guy at short… Because no one knows what it’s like to be the Desmond.  To be Ian Desmond.”  Pete said that — verbatim.

Jayson Werth – 3-for-3, 2 run, 1 RBI and his third steal.  FWIWerth, he’s been Werth a lot recently.

Carlos Gomez – 2-for-4, 2 runs, 2 RBIs and a slam (13) and legs (17).  He’s totally surprised me with how well he’s maintained his .300+ average.  You know what this means, right?  It means I’m gonna like him a lot next year and he’s going to defecate in my souvenir Benihana buddha glass.

Jean Segura – 2-for-3, 2 runs and 2 steals (25, 26).  He’s on pace for a 20+ homer, 50+ steal season.  Um, that’s first round numbers at shortstop. I liked him a lot in the preseason, but this is insane.  Not quite as insane as Rudy badgering me not to draft him in leagues, but insane nevertheless.  Rudy’s comment is to a bigger point too, lineups in March mean about as much as that girl who’s giving you eye contact.  She’s looking at you because there’s a pigeon sitting on your head.

Norichika Aoki – 2-for-5.  Seriously, where’s the steals?  Make like some Nori and roll!

Elvis Andrus – 1-for-2, 1 RBI as he batted eighth.  Elvis hasn’t left the building, but he has moved to the eight hole in the lineup.  Next stop for Elvis, playing for the Padres while Profar takes over.

Adrian Beltre – 3-for-4 and 2 homers (15, 16).  Have I mention yet this week I traded Choo for Beltre about two months ago?  No?  There ya go!

Martin Perez – 5 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 10 baserunners, 4 Ks vs. the Mariners.  Sorry, still don’t trust him.  10 baserunners in five-plus innings against a real offense will spell doom.  D-O-O-M.

Raul Ibanez – 4-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 21st homer.  The wonders of The Zombino.  They could hit 35 homers or get injured in a supermarket motorized cart accident.

Marcell Ozuna – 3-for-5, 2 RBIs and a slam (3) & legs (5), hitting .293.  Select a wall, pat it down.  Now step back five feet and do the same motion.  Now do it as a fifth outfielder and you have Marcell, the mime.

Ryan Ludwick – Will start playing rehab games by the end of this month.  I wait with bated breath.  Or baited, if a recently caught fish is reading.

Edward Mujica – 2/3 IP, 2 ER and his first blown save.  Replace him!  Kidding.  Or am I?!  Yeah, I am.

Josh Hamilton – 1-for-3, 2 RBIs and his 11th homer, now hitting .226.  Hey, he’s across the street from Marla Gibbs!

Justin Verlander – 7 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks, ERA down to 3.54.  This JUSTin…This JustIN…This JUSTIN?  Sorry, was practicing my lines.  Where were we?  Oh, yes, this Justin will end the season at a sub-3 ERA once again?  P to the erhaps.

Austin Jackson – 4-for-5, 4 runs, 3 RBIs and his 5th homer.  Missed the full house by one RBI.

Don Kelly – 3-for-4, 3 runs.  LL Donkey is doing it and doing it and doing it well.

Kyle Gibson – 5 1/3 IP, 8 ER.  That isn’t heartburn.  That’s your heart being ripped out with part of your upper intestine.  You mess with a rookie pitcher and sometimes you wake up in an ice tub labeled, “Involuntary Organ Donor.”

Justin Morneau – 2-for-3 and two solo homers.  Now has three homers in the last week, though he was coming off an 0-for-11 three-game stretch.  Though, Part II:  Though Lives, I’m sure anyone would take some power from Morneau over a few measly singles here and there.  In an interesting-not-really-that-interesting way, he had the fewest homers entering yesterday for the top 20 list of most doubles.  He’s not a leg ‘em out-type, so he most be hitting some near-homers.  In other words, he’d win the MVP if this were fantasy horseshoes or hand grenades.

Aaron Hicks – 2-for-4, 1 run and his 2nd steal in as many games.  He’s still a hacking mess, striking out at least once, most times twice per game.  On the fo’really, the Twins should let him fix things in the minors, otherwise he’s going to be a mess next year, too.

Travis Hafner – 3-for-4, 2 runs.  Hitter-Tron loves Pronk this upcoming week.  It’s a match made in heaven.  Hafner’s head resembles a wrecking ball and the Hitter-Tron is turned on by heavy machinery.

Ichiro Suzuki – 3-for-5, 2 runs, 2 RBIs.  Whenever I look at a Yankees box score I hear in my head, “Jerome!  Jerome!  Put on that Bobby Womack!
Nah, girl, I wanna go way back… Ahh, yeah, check this out…”

Adam Dunn – 3-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 23rd homer.  Now has his average all the way up to .207.  That’s no small feat for Adam Dunn, because then he’d fall over.

Joshua Phegley – White Sox promoted him.  You’ll need a slicker under the broadcasting booth when Jeanmar Gomez is pitching to Phegley.  Phegley is a ‘big-time’ prospect with the bat that is being asked to step in for Tyler Flowers, who was also a ‘big-time’ catching prospect.  In other words, Phegley could hit .220 with some power.  In other other news, he’s fine for 2-catcher, AL-Only leagues, but not much else yet.

Jose Quintana – 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 11 Ks vs. the Orioles.  I’m sure if I streamed him here, he would’ve gave up 7 ER in 2/3 IP.  The Mighty Quintana has been usable for the better part of the season, not just as a streamer.  He has a 7 K-rate, 3.69 ERA and 2.70 BB/9, which is me spelling out what a usable starter is.

Zach Britton – 7 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks.  Britton doing well on July 4th?  Not while I’m eating a jumbo frankfurter and wearing an American Flag t-shirt and Kanye shutter shades!

Carl Crawford – Likely to be activated on Friday.  Hey, that’s today!  Ugh, I shouldn’t have drank so much yesterday or is that today when I’m writing this?  I need subtitles below my head when I look in the mirror.  Who can I talk to about that?

Adrian Gonzalez – 4-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 13th homer.  It’s too bad the Dodgers can’t play their home games in Coors.

Matt Kemp – 2-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 4th homer.  This was his 2nd day in a row with a homer.  Geez, I should’ve said on the podcast that Greinke would throw 70 scoreless innings in the 2nd half.

Gerrit Cole – 5 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners, 5 Ks.  I can sit here and make excuses for Cole — and I am sitting — by saying he got Vin Mazzacred, which allowed two runs to be tacked onto Cole’s line, but, really, a 5+ inning start with a few runs and five Ks is gettable off waivers in most mixed leagues.  I like Cole a lot in deep leagues or keepers, but in redraft leagues you’re putting the rookie nookie cart before your fantasy team’s horse.

Cole Hamels – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 baserunners, 8 Ks.  Now fifteen straight starts like that and all will be forgiven.

Troy Tulowitzki – Rockies announced Tulo could return before the break.  Careful!  Don’t say break to him.

Carlos Gonzalez – Strained his back on a swing yesterday.  Maybe him and Tulo are connected cosmically in some way.  Or comically with how they can’t stay healthy.  When I said to sell CarGo, I made a bet that he’d be hurt before hitting his 27th homer.  He’s now day-to-day and sitting on 23.  I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt until he hits the DL.  So, when’s that?  In another week?

Michael Cuddyer – 2-for-3, 3 runs, 3 RBIs and his 15th homer, hitting .343.  He got his head in the clouds and he’s not backing down.  This Cuddyer is on fiiiiiiiiire… This Cuddyer is on fiiiiiiiiiiiire…

DJ LeMahieu – 3-for-4, 1 run as he hit leadoff with Josh Rutledge (2-for-4, 2 runs, 1 RBI) hitting 2nd.  See, we can all get along.

Brandon Lyon – Designated for assignment.  His assignment is to pitch for a different team.

Ike Davis – Will be recalled in time for Friday’s game.  I just went over my Ike Davis fantasy.  I wrote it while standing five feet from my keyboard.

Dillon Gee – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks.  Actually pitched even better than that because the Mess turned a dribbler to 2nd base by Parra into a double.  The box score play-by-play actually lists it as a bunt double.  When someone’s getting bunt doubles, fielders need to be removed a’la Billy Martin with Reggie.  As for Gee, he’s money.  I’d roll with him in every league.

Wil Nieves – 4-for-7, 2 RBIs.  Wil Nieves sounds like a middle reliever, right?  He hits like one too.

Ian Kennedy – 7 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks in Metco, 5.16 ERA.  I’d stream anyone in Metco.  A 5.84 ERA Justin Grimm or a Ubaldo or…Anyone, really.

Heath Bell – 1 IP and his 4th blown save.  When opposing hitters hear the Bell call, they start salivating.  Ziegler got the save yesterday once everyone else bumberfudged the job, but he just gave up 4 ER in his last two appearances.  This closing shituation has a skull and cross bones on it until the D-Backs trade for K-Rod.

Tyler Skaggs – Will start today vs. the Rockies.  The Diamondbacks are a bunch of minxes with how they keep moving Skaggs from the minors to the bigs…Tyler up, Tyler down, rawr…

Tony Campana – 3-for-6 and his 2nd steal in as many games.  Campana may not play full-time, but he will get steals when he does play.  If Rajai is the King of SAGNOF! and Leonys is the Queen (of mean) of SAGNOF!  What does that make Campana?  The Court Jester of SAGNOF?  Because he gets people giddy with his giddy up.  I find myself giggling like a school girl when I see Campana in a lineup.  Tony Campana will be played by…Jerry Lewis with Cody Ross played by Dean Martin.  “Hey, Tony, you can’t make flubber.  Hubba-bubba-double-va-va-vroom!”  That was my Dean Martin impersonation.  Now that I think about it, Dean Martin was the original Downtown Julie Brown.

  1. Jason says:
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    Yeah boyeee! im number 1. Adddropalopicus ?

    • Jason says:
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      @Jason: actually let me refine that.. Adddropallotpagas.

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        @Jason: Not crazy about it

    • Paul says:
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      @Jason: how about for michael Brantley…”.a half a dozen of one and six of the other”

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        Don’t think it works either

  2. Shin-Soo Choo Choo says:
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    Glossary term for the guy you pick up and drop two dozen times:

    Michael Corleone

    “Just when I thought I was out… they pull me back in!”

    • Alky Sobrera says:
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      @Shin-Soo Choo Choo:

      Was thinking the same lol. Or the Costanza, for a funnier, sadder version from the virgin ep of seinfeld. Can’t go wrong with seinfeld!

    • @Shin-Soo Choo Choo:

      Maybe we should come up with a list of Godfather analogies for fantasy baseball. If someone hits two home runs in a game, we could call it pulling a Fredo.

  3. liz says:
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    i want CHRIS DAVIS MONSTER on my roster so bad bad bad.

    im thinking of givin goldy AUSHIZZ and maybe Asdrubal kinda player for davis.

    i really hate to give up aushizzzz but should i try?

    thanks always.!

  4. Virinder says:
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    Drop Erasmo for Dillon Gee??

    • Terse

      Terse says:
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      @Virinder: nay. He’s GOTTA come up soon, RIGHT?

  5. Birdog says:
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    You would sit both Cashner and Milone today, correct? (12 team H2H, leading in ratios and can’t catch up in W’s or K’s anyway).

    Also, drop Milone for Gee, correct?

    • Tio says:
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      @Birdog:

      If you can’t come back in wins and k’s, there is no sense in starting them.

      Gee has been better solid k-rate… Milone you only really want for home starts.

  6. chunk says:
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    bench reynolds in favor of Chris johnson, Juan Francisco, or Wallace? Or just stick with reynolds? 16 team points league where Ks count against

    • Tio says:
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      @chunk:

      As a veteran points-leaguer… I feel you how K’s hurt you.

      All of these guys you listed are big K guys. My reccomendation would be to play the hot hand and that would be Francisco (against Righties). I’d probably hold onto Reynolds unless you have better options on the waiver wire.

      • @Grey:

        I outright dropped Reynolds a) Because I never used him and was sick of looking at his o-fers on my bench and b) I needed to dump someone for WHEELER, who I think bounces back big-time today. I’m calling my shot Grey!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Hope it works out for you…

  7. Natural Born Champs says:
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    Hi Putski,
    Whats going on with that numbnuts Cespedes? Any hope for 2nd half? I got him in my keeper league. Hold or drop? He aint that young anymore.
    Hope youre 4th of july was great :]
    You got drunk so yeah it was :{ (mustache face)

    • c0wfunk says:
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      @Natural Born Champs: he’s been really
      Really frustrating lately! Gotta think somethings wrong. Doesn’t he even care how much hittertron loves him?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Natural Born Champs: Thanks! You too! I think he’ll be fine in the 2nd half, fingers crossed

  8. Clint says:
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    I’m still amazed at your self-control in avoiding the inevitable Deliverance references w/Puig-themed blogs, Grey. Maybe when/if he falls off we’ll get the “Squealin’ like a Puig” title for his owners?

  9. Frankenstein says:
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    Glossary term suggestion:

    Yo-yo Grabba Grabba

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Frankenstein: Made me laugh, but don’t think it’s very clear what it means

  10. The Strolg says:
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    The Sure Thing

  11. bool says:
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    What?! Five recent homers given up in relief? Just add a tweak in mechanics and some pixie dust and you have the new… TankerBell! Although, after the extra long game on the fourth, and another homer, he also needs dry dock.

    Not to long ago I had Arizona’s Chad Qualls across the board. After a while I was calling his pitching “a Quallsian effort… a real kick in the qualls”.

    Knowing SAGNOF will live on, how do you feel about combining holds and saves into one category?

    After watching Collins and his “cojone lite” style of handling Harvey, I’d like to find a league that does not use W or QS, but shutout innings as a category. The innings must be started and ended by the same pitcher to count.

    5X5: Shutout innings, WHIP, holds + saves, K, and not ERA, but ERA minus the runs relievers failed to hold or save. (Is that a sabermetric stat?)

    Grey, I have been enjoying your comedic writings most of this year and find myself taking a peek more often as the season goes by. Thanks for the laughs.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @bool: Nice rant… I don’t like combining the two… Feels like it makes it too easy… Just grab the solid reliever and forget about saves… No problem…

  12. Headdowngolf says:
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    Droppickupalooza

    Or

    Drppickupaloser!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Headdowngolf: Ha… I like the second one… I’ll put it in the running…

  13. Brett says:
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    Need help been offered medlen for lowrie in my 12 team keeper league 6×6 league with ops and holds.

    Currently have an Castro rendon hill and lowrie so have an extra mi and i have better util options. Lowrie has 1 keeper value if matters.

    My staff is Strasberg Cain bailey minor weaver grienke wheeler.

    Thanks for the feedback

    • Tio says:
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      @Brett:

      Lowrie is not much of a keeper IMO. He is a veteran player who is finally healthy (knock on wood) and playing in Oakland…. hitting in a good lineup slot with a definied role. He has never had all 3 of these aspects working for him before.

      • Brett says:
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        Would you deal him for medlen?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          @Brett: I’d take Medlen

  14. Subs81 says:
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    Starter to bench and visa versa—– lets call it

    STENCH That’s what it winds up smelling like on ur roster anyway!!

    • FMFBL says:
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      @Subs81: that’s good!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Subs81: Not to bench though, it’s to waivers

  15. FMFBL says:
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    The “Ike Davis 5 feet” remark was comedic gold. Great stuff as always.

    Question-when are “buy-low” guys no longer that and just 2013-busts? I’m looking at you, Headley, Rizzo, Cespedes…
    Also, do you think Eaton has more value than a Rajai-type ROS? Should he be stashed?

    Thanks!

    • Terse

      Terse says:
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      @FMFBL: Eaton’s elbow is effed. These elbow rehabs don’t work Why don’t they just go under the knife and get it finished? Gotta stick with Cespedes. Headley, not so much

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @FMFBL: Thanks! I like Cespedes and Rizzo… Eaton could be like a Ruggiano type with a better average

  16. ichirosan says:
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    I honestly thought at first that Joey Terdoslavich was a combination of Jordan Schafer and some other Brave schmohawk

    • Clyde Prompto says:
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      @ichirosan: Hahaha I thought the same thing. I figured it was another “Bennis Carpensheeter” situation. “Joey Terdoslavich” sounds like a character from a Troma movie.

  17. Charlie says:
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    Just traded my Puig for his Votto. I should be pretty psyched about this, right?

    • Cole says:
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      @Charlie: About the safest first round pick on the planet for a waiver wire add. Yes, well done.

    • Tio says:
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      @Charlie:

      Great trade for you.

      • Terse

        Terse says:
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        @Tio: indeed, friend

  18. nboaks says:
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    just a simple Bro-yo would do

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @nboaks: Not bad, I’ll put it in the running…

  19. Cole says:
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    Joey Terdoslavich? Whoa! “Joey,” that’s a funny name.

  20. bossmanjunior says:
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    Mr. Addadropoulos (from Webster)
    YoYo
    Friend with rent-a-hits
    Cold Sore
    Droppler Effect
    Dropless Bar
    Addition Defecate Disorder
    Up n’ Downs Syndrome

    • bossmanjunior says:
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      @bossmanjunior:

      Droppick Murphys

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @bossmanjunior: I think we have better, but the first isn’t terrible…

  21. AB says:
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    Good writeup from DrunkGrey.
    Which streamer do you like to close the week?
    Buehrle vs MIN (SON = $6.7)
    Jarrod Parker @ KC ($8.2)
    Fife @ SF ($0.7)
    Morton @ Cubs ($-0.4)
    Grimm vs HOU ($4.7)
    Thanks!

    • Terse

      Terse says:
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      @AB: Parker

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @AB: Ha, thanks! None of these guys, but I guess Parker

  22. bossmanjunior says:
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    1) So you think Cashner is a sit today @ WAS?

    2) Heyward @ Adverb or Arenado @ Skaggs?

    • Tio says:
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      @bossmanjunior:

      1. Cashner has pitched well and the Nats have struggled offensively… I am endorsing starting Cashner but don’t expect the world from him.

      2. Arenado

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @bossmanjunior: 1) I wouldn’t start him on the road in many leagues, so maybe… 2) Arenado

  23. fitz says:
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    Leonys or Rajai ROS?
    thank you

    • Tio says:
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      @fitz:

      Leonys… higher ceiling… Rajai is a one-trick pony or the King of SAGNOF per Grey.

      • Terse

        Terse says:
        (link)

        @Tio: agreed

      • fitz says:
        (link)

        @Grey: @Grey: Thanks gentlemen. I dropped both Rajai and Leonys to activate Crawford and pickup Werth. Hope Werth outproduces Leonys because somebody already scooped him up.

  24. PhillyBoy32 says:
    (link)

    “Loser Dad”…Every time you put forth the effort to rekindle your relationship he lets you down.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @PhillyBoy32: That’s awesome, it’s my favorite, will run it by Rudy…

    • costaricanchata says:
      (link)

      @PhillyBoy32:

      that’s sad .

      • Philly says:
        (link)

        @costaricanchata: lol right?…glad u like it man

  25. Joey B. says:
    (link)

    How do you like more the rest of the season – Segura or Reyes – and how far apart do you have them? Thanks!

    • Tio says:
      (link)

      @Joey B.:

      Reyes and not even close. The Brewers are horrible and Segura is predictably slowing down his torrid pace. The Jays are still in the hunt and a big part of that has been a healthy return by JR.

  26. Joey B. says:
    (link)

    Err…I might *who* do you like more (Segura or Reyes). Forgive me, my Lord of Grey

  27. Joey B. says:
    (link)

    *meant*…*who*…this is not my morning.

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Joey B.: It’s okay, Joey. My brain is at about 4% capacity after last night. The answer is Reyes. #1 SS in the league when Tulo is dead like usual

  28. BTDRNKS says:
    (link)

    Start or Sit Skaggs @home Vs a Tulo/CarGo less Rockies?
    Start or Site Cashner @WAS?

    12-Team ESPN Points League…

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @BTDRNKS: I’d stay away if I had the options. LIke Cashner more, though

      • BTDRNKS says:
        (link)

        @Terse:

        I’m not picking one over the other or starting someone in their place. Basically my question is if I start either, is it probably that will they go for a loss of points or will I gain points.

        • Terse

          Terse says:
          (link)

          @BTDRNKS: they’ll go for points

  29. Rodney says:
    (link)

    OBP/Keeper league. Desperate for power. Traded Headley for Pedro Alvarez and JJ Hardy. Probably won’t keep Hardy. Did I get enough?

    (I subsequently traded Asdrubal for Ortiz to help offset the OBP hit I’d take from adding Alvarez and Hardy.)

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Rodney: definitely

  30. Rodney says:
    (link)

    Hanley Ramirez + Jay Bruce OR Chris Davis? Keeper league.

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Rodney: Ram & Jay

  31. Fungazi says:
    (link)

    I sent out an offer – My Puig & Matt Moore for Fielder & King Felix. Good idea? I have 8 solid OF for 5 possible spots and Rizzo is my only 1b.

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Fungazi: awesome idea, you’ll be lucky if the owner is dumb enough to bite

    • costaricanchata says:
      (link)

      @Fungazi:

      throw in another outfielder .

  32. papasmurf says:
    (link)

    Jennings might be boring but at least he ain’t BJ Upton who puts the ‘blow’ in BJ.

    Deep SAGNOF possibility I suppose, Hochevar now will be a setup man. Yes I laughed too. But this year he’s been really good so far. If Tommy Hunter can do it, why can’t he? For HLDs leagues, especially yahoo, the SP eligibility is a plus.

  33. Aston Gambino says:
    (link)

    Fantasy Brokeback – n. A member on your fantasy baseball team that you have an intense, borderline inappropriate love-hate relationship with.

    E.g.
    “I can’t quit you, Josh Johnson!”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Aston Gambino: Ha, not bad… I like Loser Dad better… I’ll run it by Rudy though…

    • Glitto says:
      (link)

      @Aston Gambino: I was just checking through the comments to suggest “Brokeback Claim” myself. Surprised there are no terms making that reference already.

  34. Clyde Prompto says:
    (link)

    Repeatedly picked up and dropped, while you get boned every time? Sounds like Prison Soap to me.

      • supra says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Ha, Prison Soap is pretty damn good.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          It’s funny, but I think I can go more places with using Loser Dad in the roundups…

          • Clyde Prompto says:
            (link)

            @Grey: “Loser Dad and Prison Soap” is my favorite Tom Waits song.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              HA!

  35. sanfran1966 says:
    (link)

    Justin Masterson is a guy I start then sit then start then maybe sit then sometimes start. I have timed him well, unlike Homer Bailey…

    Start or sit Masterson @ home today vs the Tigers?

    Where are you with Blanks? Starter, bench bat, FA ?

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @sanfran1966: Might want to wait on Miguel’s status before making that decision.

      And Blanks is a bench bat

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @sanfran1966: Blanks is a FA in most mixed leagues… Masterson is a start in most mixed leagues, but it’s dangerous…

  36. AL KOHOLIC says:
    (link)

    you should have said something about miggy a fellow drinker as he is

  37. Will Middlebrooks is killing it in AAA since his demotion. Jose Iglesias is not the answer. What are your thoughts on an eventual comeback for Will this year?

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Ogre U. Sole: I like Middlebrooks. He’ll be back up by the end of the season. Like him for next yea and going forward, too…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Ogre U. Sole: Yup, at some point he’ll be back… Hitting in Triple-A doesn’t mean he can do it here

  38. Fungazi says:
    (link)

    Carousel of crap – because you know once you pick that guy up he’s going to hit .150 for a week on your roster before you dump him again.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Fungazi: I think we have better

  39. Tio says:
    (link)

    Watcha think?

    Brandon Moss or Ike Davis ROS?

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Tio: Moss the boss has that crushing power – him

  40. costaricanchata says:
    (link)

    @ Grey :

    2 months ago (and again last week) when i said elvis would replace kozma
    as the starting ss in st. louis (i suggested a trade for shelby miller) ,
    you called me a crazy person .

    today , you’re saying that elvis will play ss in san diego (and replace everth
    cabrera ??) …. ” Next stop for Elvis, playing for the Padres while Profar takes over. ” !!

    you sir , are a stinking drunk .
    a) spend the weekend in palm springs drying out
    b) take a freakin’ bath

    see you on monday .

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @costaricanchata: I was being facetious on Andrus, I don’t think he’s going to the Padres

  41. DoubleHeaders says:
    (link)

    Laws yes, d-o-o-m………that spells doom.

  42. CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
    (link)

    Dammit Grey, I had picked Wallace two days ago for DraftKings tonight, and you had to go ahead and make him the lead. Now I don’t feel so batty savvy. And I have to pick someone else now….Curses!

  43. JP says:
    (link)

    Hi Grey,

    Someone dropped Mujica in my league after last nights BS. Would you drop Perkins to grab him? H2H points league.

    Best regards,

    Jan

    • Tio says:
      (link)

      @JP:

      I wouldn’t drop Perkins… He has been really good.

      • Terse

        Terse says:
        (link)

        @Tio: Yeah. You want Mujica though, consider droppin someone else

        • JP says:
          (link)

          @Terse: Thanks. We only start two closers and I’m certainly not dropping Holland as he has been lights out. I appreciate your input!

          • Terse

            Terse says:
            (link)

            @JP: Yeah, gotta stick with Holland.

  44. Ryan says:
    (link)

    In my 20 team h2h dynasty I am looking to shake things up a bit. Should I trade bourjos soler gattis for fister quentin ibanez. It’s a small trade I guess that can help me this year.

    c jp arencibia
    1b prince fielder
    2b neil walker
    ss yunel Escobar
    3b miguel cabrera
    inf evan longoria
    lf michael morse
    cf norichika aoki
    rf justin upton
    of carl crawford
    util desmond jennings
    bn nick franklin
    Bn jorge soler
    bn evan gattis
    bn jurickson profar
    bn peter bourjos

    sp clayton kershaw
    sp cliff lee
    sp yu darvish
    sp daniel straily
    rp sean doolittle
    rp mat belisle
    rp Jose veras
    rp heath bell
    p mat thorton
    p joe blamton
    p Barry zito
    bn zack wheeler

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Ryan: Yeah, it’d definitely help you this year, but losing Soler is a big loss. I’d try and find help somehwere else, personally

      • Ryan says:
        (link)

        @Terse: I’m in 2nd place right now if it makes a difference but the standings are pretty close if this makes a difference.

        • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
          (link)

          @Ryan: Trading Profar wasn’t enough of a shakeup? Well this trade will help you this year, if that makes a difference, if you’re trying to win now. But you won’t take anyone’s advice any way, so no of this makes a difference.

  45. BrewFreeOrDie says:
    (link)

    Howdy Grey,

    Hope the hangover isn’t too brutal. Been running through some possible suggestions in my head for the the players you constantly drop and pick, and I keep coming back to something along the lines of “Beer Goggles”, but I’m struggling with something clever and catchy enough to make it work. It’s that girl you see at a party from the other side of the beer pong table, the wobbly redhead where you’re like “damn I think I’ve seen her before but she’s looking a lot better (though a little wobbly) tonight and there’s just something about it that seems so right to me in the worst possible way.”

    For me this year it’s been Josh Reddick. I JUST CAN’T MOVE PAST THE BEARDED WONDER.

    Cheers to the Approaching Weekend,
    Brew

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @BrewFreeOrDie: Ha… Thanks! I think we have better selections above…

  46. malamoney says:
    (link)

    Thoughts on Dan Haren next week with two starts?

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @malamoney: You want no Haren

  47. Goldschmidt On Her Chest says:
    (link)

    I’m starting Turner vs Cards and Wheeler vs Brewers…. I feel like I’m asking for a firework to be shot in my face

  48. Utley Or C.C.

  49. Brett says:
    (link)

    Trade lowrie for medlen?

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Brett: I suppose…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Brett: I’d take Medlen

  50. PublicEnemy#1 says:
    (link)

    I’m in a 16 teamer with standard ESPN rosters, plus a couple extra bench slots and DL slots. It’s also a keeper league based on auction value (each team keeps 4 players with a $250 cap). Is this a veto-worthy trade:

    Matt Cain, Hosmer, Shuck for Rizzo, Maholm, Middlebrooks

    *Rizzo and Middlebrooks could be kept for $1 each next season only. Rizzo would be considered a pretty decent keeper and I’m guessing Middlebrooks would need to finish strong when recalled to be considered. No other players would be keeper worthy /eligible in our league.

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @PublicEnemy#1: Nay I think that’s perfectly fair

  51. Mike says:
    (link)

    Was offered Masterson and Rendon for Shelby Miller and Headley.
    Seems pretty even, do you think I should do it, only reason i want to is I’m concerned about the shutting down of Miller.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Mike: I’d take Masterson

  52. Al says:
    (link)

    Trying to find some diamonds in the rough; or maybe corn in the stool is a better way of putting it.
    14-team h2h 6×6 QS&OPS, I’m 10 games in the lead trying to find guys for the stretch run and September playoffs.

    Drop J Lyles or Kazmir for Skaggs?

    Drop Billy Hamilton for Campana or B Wallace?

    I mostly need help in the power/avg/ops department, but a guy that will hit for a good avg and steal is more valuable than a guy who will hit .220 with 10hrs to me right now. I already have Carter, LaRoche, and Eithier(and B Upton & C Granderson).

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Al: I’d drop Kazmir for Skaggs. I’d drop Hamilton for Wallace, if you can handle losing the upside Hamilton offerrs next year

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Al: Is this a keeper?

      • Al says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Sorry should’ve said, it’s no keeper. Redraft.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          @Al: Lyles for Skaggs, Hamilton for Campana

          • Al says:
            (link)

            @Grey: @Grey: @Grey:

            Thanks, Grey & Terse. Razzball has the best fantasy guidance out there, bar none. I will never, ever tell anyone in my league about it(Wouldn’t be surprised though if a couple of them read this.)

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Thanks!

  53. Nathan says:
    (link)

    Ugh! I dropped Gallardo after his last shit-fest against the Nationals (I had him benched, thankfully), and now the SON *loves* his start tomorrow against the Mets.

    Would you pick him up for that start?

    Every time I think I’m out he pulls me back in!

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @Nathan: Hold me. I’ve kept him around this long, and there’s no way I’m sitting him tomrorow. Follow me to death, Nate, or to glory.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Nathan: I’d start anyone in Metco…

      • Tigres says:
        (link)

        Gallardo is starting @ home not in Metco… I also dropped him and thought about adding him again, but just can’t pull the trigger.

  54. cubjet says:
    (link)

    A)Drop cashner for Gee?

    B)i have a logjam in my outfield.
    Cargo, Bautista, Stanton, Puig, Myers and Eaton soon coming off DL. This is a keeper league so i hate losing the younger guys, but who would you think would be expendable to try and get some pitching? Have 3 OF spots snd a utility to use.
    C)

    Thanks in advance.

    • Terse

      Terse says:
      (link)

      @cubjet: A) No
      B)Trade Stanton or Puig for some stud pitching

  55. Jake says:
    (link)

    Have Phillips Castro hill rendon. Would you trade rendon or hill for medlen? Would you do the deal and if so who do you trade?

    My staff Strasberg Cain minor bailey weaver grienke wheeler

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Jake: You don’t need pitching

  56. B.o.B says:
    (link)

    Start Anibal in his first start back tomorrow @Cle?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @B.o.B: It’s risky, depends if you need it

  57. J Money says:
    (link)

    12 Team Roto 6×6 (OPS and QS) 3 Keeper

    My Reyes and Shields/Miller for Verlander

    He has Castro at SS .
    Replacement SS for me is Rutledge.

    What side do you like and should I try trade Miller or Shields?

  58. a1r fann1ng says:
    (link)

    thank you for finally mentioning campana. :)

  59. T Moore says:
    (link)

    Mr Gray: Ozuna has been on my team for awhile now.. Cut him once.. Then picked him back up.. He’s a good one… Thought you might mention him today.. He has been quietly super for BA …
    Currently have dabbled into the Oswaldo Arcia side of things as well… He bears watching

    I cut Hamels and I’m glad I did… This was his 2nd start since the cut… I am not going back to him – at least as a permanent slotted SP this season… He is not deserving of it… Regardless of what my wounded Mr Jay Wrong says about his peripherals… I’ve moved on to cameos with the likes of Fife and Norris and others .. Thank you very much…

    By the way, any updates on our wounded Star of the Show???

    This was my first reaction when I heard he was terribly injured and headed to the hospital…

    http://www.anyclip.com/movies/slaughterhouse-five/reckless-driving/#!info/

    The above is a good representation of my initial reaction…( Instead of Valencia in the car screaming, “Billy!!!”)… It’s me in my special beach going thong speedos screaming through my hysterical tears, “JAY!!!” behind the wheel ….. And of course, the cardboard blowup of Mr Wrong as Ethel Merman is in the passengers seat – legally buckled up…

    I finally did pullover and stop, when I realized, I didn’t know what hospital he would be in.. Or even what city he lives in… But at least, it shows I cared..

    And so it goes…

    COME BACK JAY WRONG!!!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @T Moore: Ha! I bet that video is a good representation of your initial reaction to anything… “T Moore, we’re out of milk.” Cut to video. I haven’t heard from Mr. Wrong, I’m sure he’s fine

      • T Moore says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        You’re right as usual… And that’s a big part of the reason why I still have my milk delivered..

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          HA!

  60. JDW says:
    (link)

    I want to pound bags with Eric Hosmer.

    And by pound bags I mean just, you know, run the bases with him.

    And by run the bases I mean pound bags.

  61. Alky Sobrera says:
    (link)

    The Prairie Dogger

    • Alky Sobrera says:
      (link)

      @Alky Sobrera:
      Think it sounds too dirty and juvenille, which is just dirty and juvenille enough!

      • Alky Sobrera says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Ya, read loser dad after, I’m all for loser dad

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yeah, Loser Dad’s good

  62. Mike says:
    (link)

    Was offered Masterson and Rendon for Shelby Miller and Headley.
    Seems pretty even, do you think I should do it, only reason i want to is I’m concerned about the shutting down of Miller.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Mike: Didn’t you just ask this?

  63. RTP says:
    (link)

    Time to finally cut bait on Blowie Upton?

    Rank ROS BJ Upton, Aoki, Matt Joyce, De Aza

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @RTP: Yes…De Aza

  64. supra says:
    (link)

    I’ve been trying to trade for Ian Desmond since March. The guys tell me to Go F Myself. LOL.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @supra: Yeah, no one respects him

      • supra says:
        (link)

        @Grey: No, I mean the guy LOVES him. Figures the one money league I’m in with no SS, the guys are in love with Desmond, Everth, Castro… AKA all the lesser knowns or guys struggling. In my league they’re all A-Rod circa 2000.

        They probably all read Razzball… damn it!

  65. Scott says:
    (link)

    In H2H 7X7 (w/ H and BB) primarily for CF, should I drop Aoki for Revere? I also have De Aza, but Aoki/Revere being available for all three OF positions is helpful.

  66. Josh O'Neil says:
    (link)

    I’m deep with pitchers and hurting offensively……thought’s on trading my Jordan Zimmermann for J-UP?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d take Upton

  67. Jake says:
    (link)

    Starting wheeler tonight?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I wouldn’t start him anywhere

  68. Strykers says:
    (link)

    VOLATILITY

    category for players added/dropped frequently

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I like Loser Dad better

  69. Debo says:
    (link)

    Harvey for Longoria? Its a keeper league and Harvey is 23rd loosing 3 rds per year. H2H points league.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d hold Harvey

  70. Rachet77 says:
    (link)

    How ’bout “The Unflushable” – Like that turd in the toilet you keep trying to flush down, but keeps coming back

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Not bad, I like Loser Dad better

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA!

  71. JoeG says:
    (link)

    Whom do you guys think will have a better 2nd Half: Ike Davis or Middlebrooks?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ike

  72. The Thumb says:
    (link)

    About to trade Locke/Greinke/Bruce for Kershaw/Lucroy

    Nearing innings limit and have been streaming catching all year. Good deal?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sounds fine

  73. MagicTerp says:
    (link)

    The guy I’ve added dropped added the most this year is Mike Leake – so I humbly submit…
    Taking a Leake

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Hehe… I think Loser Dad is better

  74. Paz says:
    (link)

    drop arenado for Ike davis? ( for the time being at least)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d hold

  75. Long Bawls says:
    (link)

    Glossary term: pogo pick?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Not bad at all… I like Loser Dad better, but will run it by Rudy…

      • Long Bawls says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Yeah, I think Loser Dad is funnier, but this is maybe more comprehensible. That said, we’re not here for comprehensibility!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Oh, hells nah!

          • Jack Full of Hate says:
            (link)

            @Grey: did I miss something in the rundown today for a new glossary term….I write this with one eye open

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Ha…Yeah, Brantley, I’m on Loser Dad but there’s a few good entries…

              • Jack Full of Hate says:
                (link)

                @Grey: I read it, tough day to ask for commentor creativity, I think we might need the weekend to hash something out…..why do I play volleyball every 4th and then need to go see my masseuse every 5th?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Haha… Yeah, I hear ya… Bad day to ask for a term…Do like Loser Dad though…

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: I like the definition better than the term, Dead Beat Dad is more in the general consciousness

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      I think Loser Dad is funnier…

              • costaricanchata says:
                (link)

                @Grey:

                i vote for pogo pick .

                can’t see Ella ever saying Loser Dad .

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Ha…Noted…

  76. DMurph says:
    (link)

    Stick-Tease-n. A player on the ww you have a crush on who is currently swinging the stick like a champion, but as soon as you ad to your roster, they regress into a slump and make you look like a foo in front of your homies.

    ex. Dude, Moustakas was hitting .300 last week so I thought I was getting some for sure when I picked him back up, but he turned out to be a total stick-tease and left me feeling lonely and foolish.

    Another great razz article! Now if only I could find a buyer for my Dom Brown/Aoki package offer.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That’s a solid entry, I kinda like Loser Dad better, but will put it on the list for Ruddy to look at…

  77. Long Bawls says:
    (link)

    Was also thinking “waiverang” for glossary, but prolly not as good. Especially because it makes me think of Aaron Harang. Nobody wants that.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yeah, not as good

  78. Wilsonian says:
    (link)

    Need to see who to drop for Crawford as he comes off my DL. Here’s the whole squad:

    C – McCann (finally Popeiling something…many apologies for the catcher questions)
    1B – Fielder
    2B – Utley
    3B – Longo
    SS – Hanley
    OF – Jones
    OF – Davis
    OF – Marte
    UTIL – Jennings
    UTIL – Alvarez
    BN – Hosmer
    DL – Crawford
    DL – Tulo

    SP – Scherzer, Moore, Gio, Homer, Fister, Lackey, Minor, Dickey
    RP – Mujica, Parnell, Gregg, Benoit

    I can play up to 5 RPs.

    Stats: H, R, HR, RBI, SB, AVG, OBPS, W, QS, SV, Ks, Ks/9, ERA, WHIP
    8 Team H2H

    Who’s the drop for Crawford? And would you lose someone for Cishek? He’s been lights out and it never hurts to pretty much guarantee your win in saves every week.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Gregg for Cishek… Alvarez for Crawford

  79. chisox22 says:
    (link)

    Jose reyes is heating up nicely after injury, is this something to expect in the second half or no? I have a trade offer, jose reyes for cliff lee, I have peralta on the bench and I even think aybar is on the wire. Your thoughts?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d want Lee… I don’t trust Reyes…

  80. CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
    (link)

    Hidden Salami? Like you’ve been wooing this hot chick for a while and your finally about to about to hook up, but then you stick your hand down her pants and discover a penis. *May not be applicable to others experiences.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I think Loser Dad is better

  81. Jon says:
    (link)

    Would you add Quintana over EJax, Tazawa or Street?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Over Tazawa

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Yeah, I got the reference, just don’t think it’s better…

      • Sanfran says:
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        @Grey:

        I think the creators of that show are the acid casualties of HR Pufenstuf.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha!

  82. Jack Full of Hate says:
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    I’m not at all trying for the term with this but it reminds me of a tranny with a nice rack, tranny boobs, from a distance you just see amazing boobs, perfect in all their glory, then you get closer and see the adams apple and now you start to run away, then you look back to see if IT”S following you and you see the boobs again but now question what may or may not have been an adam’s apple so you go back towards the boobs only to discover you were right the first time, the cycle is an endless battle between good looking booobs and the adam’s apple you don’t want to see…..I write this to make others uncomfortable

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha! Thanks! We’ve all been there… Long hair, sexy from the back, then they turn around…

      • Jack Full of Hate says:
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        @Grey: and living where you do I know this has happened at least once or 20 times, I don’t think it’s a term, unless you want it to be in the running, but I really feel it captures the essence of the constant battle. In season’s past it was always Carlos Gomez that gave us these fits

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, there’s always that moment when you get just close enough to a player…

  83. Loser Dad is definitely a winner, but I thought I’d throw three more at you anyway.

    Crack Whacker – you’re hooked on a hitter and keep coming back to it even though you know it’s bad.

    Drunk Sex – see above

    Honkin’ On Bobo – Not only a reference to a horrid Aerosmith album but also to Bobo Newsome, a pitcher who was traded 16 times

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I don’t think these are better… Bobo Newsome is a great reference though

  84. EK says:
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    Masterson vs DET or Griffin @ K.C.
    H2H pts

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Masterson

  85. Long Bawls says:
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    So at this point last year Chris Davis had had about 1300 major league at bats, had hit .256 with about 59 HRs.

    Ike Davis has had 1357 major league at bats, hitting .239 with 63 HRs.

    Ike is 1 year and 5 days younger than Chris.

    Their last names are both Davis.

    But Chris’ middle name is “Lyn.”

    Shrink-wrap that with a penny and a quarter and charge $25.95 for it!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ha, awesome

  86. Brian says:
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    16 Team h2h

    Harvey for Verlander and Romo? Who wins rest of the way? (Does Harvey get shut down??)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I’d get cheaper saves if I needed Romo… I just went over Harvey’s IP limit…

      • Brian says:
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        So I’m assuming you like Verlander the rest of the year over Harvey?

        You think I can get Kate upton in the trade?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I wouldn’t assume that

  87. Nathan says:
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    With regards to starting Gallardo tomorrow against the Mets, he’s at home in Milwalkee, not at MetCo. SON loves it regardless. What do you think?

    Also, which trade do you like better for me for the 2nd half. I’m trying to sell Marte for some pitching.

    Marte + Grienke for Verlander

    or

    Marte for Iwakuma

    Thanks Grey!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Oh, then I wouldn’t touch him at home… I don’t like either, but would take Verlander

  88. FuzzyD says:
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    Hilarous drunk Grey! …who do you think gets more steals and better OBP rest of season…Dyson or Campana?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks! Dyson

  89. booya says:
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    How do you rank Alcides, Cozart and Alexei ROS?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @booya: Alexei, Alcides

  90. Grey

    Grey says:
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    *****THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS*******

  91. BluePulaski says:
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    Glossary term:
    “Trash Heap” – Marjory the Trash Heap from Fraggle Rock; one man’s (or one Brooke’s) trash is another man’s (or another Brooke’s) treasure; even though she was trash, the gang still found some value in her wisdom. http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Marjory_the_Trash_Heap

    Could also use: “Trash Heap Treasure”

    Could also be “The Ex” BF or GF who’s drives a ’89 Hyundai but still finds a hot new gf/bf to take take of them.

    P.S. Sorry, posted this in your Buy/Sell first by accident Grey…if you’re still drunk, now would be a good time to watch an old episode of Fraggle Rock…try not to eat any plastic!

  92. Grey

    Grey says:
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    ******THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS*******

  93. james says:
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    just traded Veras for McCann in a keeper (1 catcher set up, but i have been running with yan gomes for the past few weeks and have 4 other closers).

    good deal?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Sounds solid

  94. Grey

    Grey says:
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    *******THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS********

  95. Thomas says:
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    Brantlamey

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Thomas: I think we have better

  96. Grey

    Grey says:
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    *********THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS********

  97. The Tease says:
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    The Jake Gyllenhaal – I wish I knew how to quit you!

  98. Slainte says:
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    michael brantley is what i would simply call a ‘rerun’.

  99. Jiles says:
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    Need SP help. I have Kenley, Holland, and Perkins @ RP. Should I drop Henderson and Cashner and scoop up Erasmo and Gee for ROS? 12 team leauge, don’t think I can get anything for Hendy or Cash. Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Go for it

  100. Jason says:
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    What do you think about longo/grienke for beltre/anibel?

  101. Russ says:
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    Hey guys I have a very serious need for SBs, I am currently in 5th, but battling for second. I have Grey’s Boy Toy Rutledge on my roster still and I overly stacked with OFers.

    I get DJ Lehmaieu
    He gets Marcell Ozuna

    Let me know thoughts.

  102. Jason Katnip says:
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    Add Ervin Santana and Ricky Nolasco:

    drop Zack Wheeler, Nolan Arenado, Adam Lind, Rex Brothers, Jim Henderson, Jacob Turner?

    How much FAAB to put on Ricky and Ervin?

  103. FillyP says:
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    Wicked glad I moved Gordon for Hill last week!

    What do you think about moving Pablo for Cobb?

Comments are closed.