Don't be shellfish...Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+

As always, probable pitchers are subject to change.  For a look at all fantasy baseball streamers, click this link.

For some reason, I’m cool with the cat-and-mouse game of pitchers hiding sandpaper and pine tar, and I kind of like umpire errors. They’re quirks that are part of the DNA of the game, like grabbing your balls and lighting your teammate’s feet on fire. Do we need new rules for ball grabbing and pyromaniacs with foot fetishes? I didn’t think so.

And while I love home plate collisions as much as the next tobacco-spewing, pot-bellied third base coach, baseball done good by following in the footsteps of the NFL and NBA and addressing concussions.

But maybe they didn’t go far enough. How else to explain rising star hurlers Danny Salazar and Michael Wacha confusing the mound for a carnival stand, and the catcher’s mitt for a stack of neatly arranged milk bottles? Salazar’s bizarre April 10 start against the White Sox was actually an improvement on his garbage juice-drenched season. Way to go Danny, you struck out 10 guys in just 3.2 innings of work – here’s your oversized plush California Raisin! Nevermind that Chicago banged out five runs on six hits, because an ERA of 12.27 for the game isn’t too far off from your 7.85 ERA for the season.

Meanwhile, Wacha got whiffs on 10 of his 12 outs in four innings of sloppy work against the Mets on April 23. This followed four pretty decent starts in which he went 2-2 and walked only three guys – yet he walked five during this Dock Ellis-esque performance at Citi Field.

All of this is to say that I’m a little worried about Wacha this week. Milwaukee can bash (and the Cardinals can’t hit) and it seems like pitchers experience control problems in Wrigley (and the Cardinals can’t hit).

Now that I’ve made it through a whole opening without playing on Wacha’s name even once, here’s the rest of this week’s double dippers:

Must Start

Jose Fernandez (ATL, LAD), Max Scherzer (@CWS, @KC), Yu Darvish (OAK, @LAA), Zack Greinke (@MIN, @MIA), Alex Wood (@MIA, SF)

I will doubt J-Fer no more, and while you may doubt Greinke and his hot start, you can’t doubt that he has some nice matchups. Same can be said for Wood, who was sick last time out against Miami and should be again.

First Tier

Madison Bumgarner (SD, @ATL), Sonny Gray (@TEX, @BOS), Jeff Samardzija (@CIN, STL), Tony Cingrani (CHC, MIL), Yovani Gallardo (@STL, @CIN), Michael Wacha (MIL, @CHC)

Me: “Gallardo will bounce back this year.”

You: “You’re an idiot.”

Me: “That’s true, but Gallardo will still bounce back.”

True, he gives up some hits, and he’s not striking out people like he used to (6.54 K/9 rate), but he’s pitching smarter. No other way to explain a 1.42 ERA and a 1.07 WHIP. I don’t love him this week, but I don’t hate him either.

Second Tier

Jason Vargas (TOR, DET), John Lackey (TB, OAK), Kyle Lohse (@STL, @CIN), Tyler Skaggs (CLE, TEX), Jon Niese (@PHI, @COL), Tyson Ross (@SF, ARZ), Justin Masterson (@LAA, CWS), Alfredo Simon (CHC, MIL), CC Sabathia (SEA, TB)

Masterson is like Crazy Eyes on “Orange Is The New Black” – he might clean the bathrooms and act all cuddly and nice and give you six good innings with lots of punchouts and a chance to win, or he might pee on the floor and get bombed for five runs. I’m following Piper’s lead and avoiding the Masterbaterson.

Third Tier

Jose Quintana (DET, @CLE), Chris Young (@NYY, @HOU), Tyler Chatwood (@ARZ, NYM), Wade Miley (COL, @SD), Franklin Morales (@ARZ, NYM), Kyle Gibson (LAD, BAL), Erik Bedard (@BOS, @NYY)

Kid Rock doppelganger Miley has shifted between great and Bowitdabad, and that’ll happen again this week when he vomits runs at home against the Rockies and then twirls a gem in San Diego.

Don’t start

Jake Odorizzi (@CWS, @NYY), Andre Rienzo (TB, @CLE), Dustin McGowan (@KC, @PIT), Mike Pelfrey (LAD, BAL)

On Monday we will have Odorizzi vs. Rienzo, and it’s not the undercard on the next big pay-per-view event. It is, however, a matchup you should avoid like the plague. McGowan, meanwhile, recently reported suffering from fatigue. McGowan to John Gibbons: “I’m not a pitching machine.” Gibbons: “Well …”

  1. noseeum says:
    (link)

    How do you figure Scherzer getting two starts? I know he’s going on Tuesday, but they have Thursday off. Assuming Smyly gets skipped again?

  2. Gob Bluth says:
    (link)

    Does Scherzer really have 2 starts this week?
    I’m showing he’s only got one start on the 30th

    • slicke5 says:
      (link)

      Scherzer will be on normal rest to go Tuesday the 29th and again the 4th. Porcello is going Wednesday the 30th.

  3. Jollyroger says:
    (link)

    What about Eovaldi? He isn’t pitching til wednesday.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Jollyroger: thanks for the catch. eovaldi is indeed one start

  4. de nachos says:
    (link)

    I wish Eovaldi was a two-starter, but it appears with the off-day Monday and Jo-Fer going he’s not. Hoping we’ll see him jump to the first tier come next week tho.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @de nachos: we fixed this. thanks!

  5. Pete Best says:
    (link)

    Hi! Who do you like best in h2h out of M. Perez (oak), Porcello (@kc), or two starts from Morales? Thanks!

  6. Tim says:
    (link)

    Howdy pete!

    I have quite the decision to make this week; we start three starting pitchers and it’s weekly roster lock/ H2h/ 10 teamer.

    Strasberg (1 start)

    Tanaka (1 start)

    Cueto (1 start)

    RP- Papelbon

    RP- Alex wood (2 starts)

    Bench:

    Bumgarner ( 2 starts)

    Gerrit cole (1 start)

    Zach wheeler (1 start)

    - would you keep the three starters, or bench cueto for Bumgarner? I don’t want to bench tanaka or Strasberg – also part number two of my question, would you consider dropping or trading zach wheeler?

    Thanks

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Tim: Yeah Bumgarner has the good matchup with SD and he’ll rack up K’s with two starts. I’d hold on Wheeler.

  7. buge hoobs says:
    (link)

    Gray a 1st tier? SON has him at -2.5 & 0.9 $
    Why such a discrepancy?

    • Beardcrabs says:
      (link)

      @buge hoobs: SON is based off a formula composed of multiple factors derived into a dollar value… this article is Pete Nices opinion…

      • Pete Nice

        Pete Nice says:
        (link)

        @buge hoobs: @Beardcrabs: : Thanks for clarifying Beardcrabs. In one sense I’m trying to give you the two starters for the week. in another I’m ranking them based on how I think they’ll perform. I am a big believer in SON but I don’t always agree.

  8. buge hoobs says:
    (link)

    Also, someone just dropped Cobb.

    3 BN slots used by Springer, Tillman and Kluber. Drop any of these to stash a DL Cobb?

  9. Nick says:
    (link)

    I think Simon is a tier too low, especially with the Cubs on board.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Nick: lot of distractions going on too

  10. Ron says:
    (link)

    Skaggs or Pineda ROS?

  11. malamoney says:
    (link)

    Would you trade Alex Gordon to get Cain in a H2H points league?

  12. Mets Guy says:
    (link)

    Would you trade away Jacoby Ellsbury for Hanley Ramirez. My current SS is Dee Gordon and my OF are Trout, Ellsbury, Justin Upton, Melky Cabrera, Yasiel Puig, Adam Eaton and Polanco

  13. would you trade:
    CC Sabathia & Jered Weaver for Madison Bumgarner
    roto league, 10 team

  14. malamoney says:
    (link)

    How about Gordon and Shelby Miller for Bumgarner?

  15. Shoehorn Hands says:
    (link)

    Beltran for J. Zimmermann – which side is better? Is it fair?

  16. Picard56 says:
    (link)

    Start Gio gonzalez or Tyson Ross this week? My opponent has only 5 starts, while I would have 9 starts with Tyson Ross and 8 with Gio.
    we count innings pitched, wins, cg, era and whip as stats.

    sp- King Felix -1
    sp- Cliff Lee- 1
    sp- Cole Hamels -1
    sp- Gio Gonzalez- 1
    RP- Tony Cingrani-2
    RP- Alex Wood-2
    Bn- Tyson Ross

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Picard56: Gio

  17. Ante GALIC says:
    (link)

    Pete! Gr8 column, Wacha-Wacha! There I did it for you to spare your good name! Always a pleasure to read your schizz.

    Ante (it’s Balkan for Anthony, what’s in a name anywho)

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Ante GALIC: thank you kind sir

  18. Zar says:
    (link)

    Hey Pete. I got an abundance of OFers right now and a need for 3B and pitching (I’ve lost both Moore and Anibal so far). Should I try to turn CarGo (Col) and Frazier Into Donaldson and Strasburg do you think I should? It’s mostly the 1st round for 3rd/5th round picks that I’m hung up on ><.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Zar: getting an ace is good thinking. Strasburg as that ace, I dunno. I like the trade as a concept though. does the guy have another stud you could swap in there?

      • Zar says:
        (link)

        @Pete Nice: king Felix or cingrani.

        • Zar says:
          (link)

          @Zar: I should probably say its a 5×5 roto league.

          • Pete Nice

            Pete Nice says:
            (link)

            @Zar: Felix

  19. Eddie the Mush says:
    (link)

    Who would you want ROS…J. Chavez or T. Roark? OR neither and pick up Bauer and wait for the call-up?
    Also ROS rank…Weaver, Tillman, Lynn.
    Thanks.

  20. Frank White says:
    (link)

    What’s up Bro.. Would you trade Cingrani and Alex Rios for Martin Pérez and Zobrist??

  21. Sixto Lezcano says:
    (link)

    UPDATE: Looks like Harang is a two-starter this week too. Nice schedule, but can he keep it going?

  22. Ghost of the Disappeared says:
    (link)

    My Mr. Nice: Burhrle was way overdue for a crash landing. It was unbelievable while it lasted.

    Playing Peralta against Cubbies at home thinking he has another good one in him before reality hits. In general, I felt, the Brewers were primed for a bounce back like no other MLB staff. Still it has been impressive.

    Really liked the move of Vargas to KC. But, how long before he begins pitching to even a good/solid season mean? Right now, he must be running on the fumes of his off season PED program. He has a good match up with an intriguing & feel good story, M Gonzalez of the Birds, today. I am not surprised to see Vargas where you have placed him.

    PS: I’m now fully convinced, our commish Jay Wrong is manipulating our leagues standings numbers from deep under RazzBall Towers in the ESPN Game Day Stat Interdiction Command Center bunker. Where you guys keep all Rudy’s FBB game day changing high tech gear and super computers.

    You can defend JW until the cows come home. But remember, you haven’t gotten all the glitches out of the programs yet.

    It’s pretty obvious something is going on when the screen goes flashes like a star burst shell has gone off, your computer leaps of the table and then when the screen’s smoke clears, you can see your numbers in the standings aggregate matrix have suddenly changed downwards.

    What is worst of all, is usually right after that, a smug commish Jay Wrong posts a message to you – like, “See you’re having a rough day. Too bad. My team’s doing great!”

    Come On! I wasn’t born yesterday.

  23. Lemmingness says:
    (link)

    How long do you think it’ll take for batters to start figuring Alex Wood out? Is it his weird delivery that’s helping him out? Should I entertain the idea of selling high soon? Thanks

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Lemmingness: He’s an Atlanta-bred pitcher, that’s what’s helping him out. They grown ‘em good down in Georgia! I’d hold. I like Wood. I mean um

  24. Lemmingness says:
    (link)

    How long do you think it’ll take for batters to start figuring Alex Wood out? Is it his weird delivery that’s helping him out? Should I entertain the idea of selling high soon? Thanks

  25. Tp says:
    (link)

    Can you help me out? Pick 3 (w, IP, k, era):

    Archer
    Colon
    Leake
    Lincecum
    Morales
    Porcello

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Tp: Archer, Leake, Porcello

  26. Thom says:
    (link)

    Yo any opinion on Jason Hammel’s next start? Not coming up with data on SON.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Thom: I like it. He’s really been in control and the Cards can be handled.

      • Thom says:
        (link)

        @Pete Nice: Thanks Pete. Appreciate it! Picked him up from Twostartapalooza last week and it panned out pretty nicely!

  27. Mike says:
    (link)

    I have Alfredo Simon – but I would drop him for Skaggs for two starts also – who do you side with?

    Thanks…

    Mike.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Mike: I’d hang onto Simon but this assault thing could be an issue.

      • Mike says:
        (link)

        @Pete Nice: Thanks Pete!

  28. pierce says:
    (link)

    streamer likes skaggs and miley starts and I exactly don’ t like wheeler start in COL. so I would need to drop either chavez or hurtchinson for skaggs pick up. do I do that?

  29. Mike says:
    (link)

    Not a two start question, but I have AJ Burnett on the wire in one league and I was wondering if I should drop Kuroda for him?

    My current SPs are:

    Doug Fister
    Gio Gonzalez
    Hiroki Kuroda
    Hisashi Iwakuma
    Hyun-Jin Ryu
    Julio Teheran
    Matt Cain
    Yordano Ventura
    Zack Greinke

    Thanks!

    Mike.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @Mike: I wouldn’t. What’s the size of your league?

  30. fausto says:
    (link)

    Weekly lock league. 4sp/1rp. 8starts max… With the rainout sunday does verlander go 2x this week Tuesday/sunday? I have 2 start options in skaggs/ross/simon. Or 1 start from yordano/archer/eovaldi/salazar. Det has posted verlander, porcello, smyly for tues wed thurs. I think I gotta throw verlander and hope he gets the 2. I can slot ross as rp. And bnch my cl. Light week schedule gonna need sp to carry me in points. So id go verlander, simon, skaggs, ross, and urehara or nathan at rp. …assuming verlander goes twice.

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
      (link)

      @fausto: @fausto: it’s hard I guess what managers will do. sometimes I think they hate fantasy and try and eff us over haha. if you gamble on verlander you might have to compensate for it with a lesser two starter over a preferable one starter

  31. Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
    (link)

    niese seems high for those 2 ballparks.

  32. Alex says:
    (link)

    Would you start quintana over any of these?

    Cishek, Romo, Koji, Iwakuma, Burnett, Lynn, Cliff Lee, Liriano, Kennedy

    Thanks

Comments are closed.