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Top 20 catchers, 1st basemen, 2nd basemen and 3rd basemen are in the books.  What a strange, glorious trip it’s been!  Though not really.  Today, the top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball get to shine.  Hmm… Actually, most of these won’t shine.  They’re cloudy with a chance of crapballs.  As I said in the 2nd baseball recap post, the shortstops are almost exactly as shallow as the shortstops and 3rd basemen.  Now it’s time to be a bit more specific.  The top ten shortstops were better than the 2nd basemen and 3rd basemen.  Yes, that is scary.  Though if you were in a deeper league or if you used an MI, the fall off from the 13th to 20th ranked shortstops is not pretty, whereas the 2nd basemen held their value as you dropped down the rankings.  3rd base was as big a mess in the lower half of the rankings as shortstops.  Okay, enough of the hubbub on the tomfoolery.  To recap, this final ranking is from ESPN Player Rater with my comments.  The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

1. Jose Reyes – I’m a huge Reyes fan and he didn’t disappoint this year.  He missed almost forty games and still was the top ranked shortstop.  If you filled him in halfway decently while he was injured, you had huge production from his spot.  He cut his K-rate by a solid margin, had a bit of luck on average but should’ve had more homers.  Six of one yadda3.  I kinda want to see him end up in Boston this offseason, but I’m also afraid his value will be inflated a’la Crawford and his injuries could resurface.  As for that whole sitting out to win the batting title thing, it doesn’t matter for fantasy.  It’s about as relevant as Miggy filling his jock strap with airplane bottles of liquor.  Turn down the treble and eliminate the noise.  On a side note, why is Jose Reyes freakin’ naked on the cover of ESPN, The Magazine?  I have girls back to my house and they don’t understand.  My moms sees this magazine and she’s questioning things.  Not that there’s anything wrong with the questions.  Preseason Rank #3, 2011 Projections:  110/12/60/.290/40, Final Numbers:  101/7/44/.337/39

2. Troy Tulowitzki – Imagine if I jumped out of DeLorean in March and told you Tulo would miss September, would you still have drafted him?  I’m guessing no.  I’m Guessing, II:  The Return of I’m Guessing; you would’ve regretted not drafting him.  I’m Guessing, III:  I Didn’t See The 2nd I’m Guessing But They’re Making Another One?; if you were in a H2H league, you probably would’ve regretted not drafting him less.  Preseason Rank #2, 2011 Projections:  95/30/105/.280/15, Final Numbers:  81/30/105/.302/9

3. Starlin Castro – Was one of those players that I wasn’t excited about in January when I did the rankings, then ended up with him on multiple teams because Rudy liked him a lot.  Sometimes Rudy’s smart.  (Sometimes last March Rudy told me he didn’t want Kemp on every team.  Sometimes I shouldn’t have listened.)   Preseason Rank #12, 2011 Projections:  75/5/55/.305/12, Final Numbers:  91/10/66/.307/22

4. Asdrubal Cabrera – He was ranked low by me in the preseason, but I did put him in a group of players you should take a flyer on at the end of the draft.  I’ve had much love for Asdrubal from the moment he burst on the scene with his easy-to-giggle-at first name.  Still, his power output this year is ridonkiculous.  25 homers?  Really?  Did Hanley and him urinate into a fountain as they made a wish at the same time?  (I ranked Asdrubal 22nd overall, but I said in the preseason blurb I’m only doing that to highlight him and he’s actually above Castro, so, ya know, don’t hate the ranker, hate the game.)  Preseason Rank #11, 2011 Projections:  80/7/60/.295/20, Final Numbers:  87/25/92/.273/17

5. Elvis Andrus – Came pretty close to performing exactly as I thought he would, but, for full disclosure purposes (or porpoises if dolphins are reading), I wanted more from Andrus.  He reminds me of Brian McCann.   I expect them to break out in a huge way, then they perform well and I’m still slightly disappointed.  I’m telling you, one of these years Andrus is gonna give us a Reyes in his prime year.  Preseason Rank #4, 2011 Projections:  95/5/50/.270/45, Final Numbers:  96/5/60/.279/37

6. Emilio Bonifacio – Went over him in the top 20 third basemen post.

7. Jimmy Rollins – Gave a much better season than I expected from him.  And it might’ve been better if it wasn’t for Utley’s injury.  While filling in the three hole (not like that!), Rollins’s line was 17/1/5/.271/5.  And you thought Utley only hurt you directly.  He’s giving you indirect reasons to dislike him.  Preseason Rank #5, 2011 Projections:  85/14/65/.260/20, Final Numbers:  87/16/63/.268/30

8. Erick Aybar – Back on January 18th (which is my birthday, mark it down!), I left Aybar off my top 20 preseason ranking and commenter, Fanthead, said, “Doesn’t Erick Aybar (who is not ranked) have the wherewithal to match (Alcides’s) numbers (70/3/40/.275/30)?”  Well, la di da!  Maybe Fanthead should do his own rankings!  And use words like wherewithal throughout!  I keed.  It was a good call by Fanthead.  Aybar did have the wherewithal.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  71/10/59/.279/30

9. Derek Jeter – Here’s what I said back in the preseason, “So I’ve been watching the first season of Friday Night Lights.  Great show.  I’d say SPOILER ALERT! but that season’s like seven years old.  Anyway, when Riggins was stealing Minka from Street, I kept imagining Street yelling, ‘So, Jeter, it’s okay to steal a cripple’s girlfriend, but you won’t fight a cripple?!'”  That has nothing to do with anything, but it made me laugh when I was reviewing what I had said.  Now Jeter’s on to the next one and Minka’s remaking a terrible show with an even worse show.  As for Jeter, what can be said about him that hasn’t been said before?  His power’s all but evaporated and he gets runs and average.  Yay or who cares?  Yay or who cares?  YAY OR WHO CARES?!  That’s what I’m asking you!  Sorry, lost my shizz there for a second.  Preseason Rank #6, 2011 Projections:  105/12/65/.280/15, Final Numbers:  84/6/61/.297/16

10. Jhonny Peralta – Went over him in the top 20 third basemen post.

11. J.J. Hardy – The real mystery with Hardy is why is he ranked so low.  Maybe because he came so cheaply in drafts or off of waivers, but he seemed way more valuable than 11th overall.  If I were ranking these guys, I’d put Hardy above Bonifacio.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  76/30/80/.269

12. Alexei Ramirez – In May and September, he hit around .300 and didn’t steal one base.  Removing doubles, triples and homers, that’s fifty-eight times he was on first and just stood there like a cat stole his tongue… Well, that cliche doesn’t work, but you get my drift.  Preseason Rank #7, 2011 Projections:  80/17/70/.280/14, Final Numbers:  81/15/70/.269/7

13. Yunel Escobar – I could be guaranteed Yunel’s final line in March and I wouldn’t draft him.  I’d still prefer to draft someone who could actually be better with upside.  Preseason Rank #18, 2011 Projections:  75/10/60/.290/7, Final Numbers:  77/11/48/.290/3

14. Ian Desmond – Was he all that and a bag of Funyuns?  Nah, not exactly.  But I think you could’ve done worse with your MI.  And you put what I think in one of those 50’s supercomputers and it spits back at you, “So what?”  Have I learned my lesson with Desmond for next year?  He hit 8 homers and stole 25 bases, not sure what there is to learn.  I’ll take it every day for my MI and twice on Muesday.  Preseason Rank #10, 2011 Projections:  80/15/70/.280/20, Final Numbers:  65/8/49/.253/25

15. Alcides Escobar – If I may toot my own horn — though if I could actually toot my own horn, I’d never leave the house — I did really well with projections this year.  January Grey was locked in.  January Grey, “Funny you use that turn of a phrase cause I’m actually locked up in Guatemala.  Look for me on Locked Up Abroad!”  Preseason Rank #11, 2011 Projections:  70/3/40/.275/30, Final Numbers:  69/4/46/.254/26

16. Cliff Pennington – Now we’re at the point in this exercise where you really shouldn’t have owned any of these guys all year long.  And, if you did, you’re not reading this anyway.  You’re over in our fantasy football or fantasy hockey or fantasy basketball section talking about how Grey’s a dumbass.  Preseason Rank #14, 2011 Projections:  60/5/40/.245/30, Final Numbers:  57/8/58/.264/14

17. Marco Scutaro – One good month and you too can get in the top 20 shortstops.  3 ladies and gentlemen, your 2011 shortstops!  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  59/7/54/.299/4

18. Hanley Ramirez – On top of him taping heroin to your back and pushing you through a Turkish checkpoint, his name value made everything much worse.  I’ll explain.  If you have someone like Scutaro and he’s not performing, you drop him for someone else.  You have Hanley and you hold out hope until the bitter end.  Or worse, you trade for him thinking he’s gonna bounce back.  Yeah, Hanley killed some teams this year.  We may forgive, we will never forget.  Preseason Rank #1, 2011 Projections:  100/26/100/.310/25, Final Numbers:  55/10/45/.243/20

19. Darwin Barney – Went over him the top 20 2nd basemen post.

20. Yuniesky Betancourt – His name anagrams to Batter Nine You Sucky.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  51/13/68/.252/4

From Around The Web

  1. centralohguy says:
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    How the heck do you figure out that anagram for YB? That shite is so unlikely and yet so appropriate. I caught crap for trading Jeter/Lilly for Hanley. Turns out I had traded for it and ended up streaming several turds I should not have owned. Still managed a #2 finish though. I’m sensing a theme here.

  2. Awesomus Maximus

    Awesomus Maximus says:
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    Hanley was the guy I paid the most for at auction, The Drubal was a free agency pickup in the first month. The former hit me in the poop chute, the latter was my ladder to first place. Oh fantasy baseball… how I love to hate loving you.

  3. schlitzy says:
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    When I kept longoria and got the second pick and took hanley I thought i was the meow’s cat.grabbing dunn in the 6th round of a 14 team ops league was the icing on the cake. I feel like dave hester dropped a crappy locker on me. Yuuuup.

  4. VinWins

    VinWins says:
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    Excellent projections. I think short stop is your best position so far. Amazingly close on Andrus, Alcides, Yunel, and Alexei.

    As for Rollins, he pretty much did exactly what you predicted before Utley’s injury (with extra steals), so maybe it didn’t hurt Rollins too much.

    Well done!

  5. OaktownSteve says:
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    @Grey: Can’t agree that Reyes, even with those very fine numbers, was more valuable than Tulo.

  6. OaktownSteve says:
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    @grey: oh and I realize you’re using ESPN. How would you rank Reyes Tulo? Especially considering your dislike for all things average.

  7. theguarantee says:
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    A very premature thing to say at this point but I wrote down next to Reyes in my handy little notepad that I’d be willing to push all-in on him next year. He’s just too talented.

    The real question to me though – where do you think Hanley will get drafted next year?

    Tulo>Hanley>Reyes?

  8. Jay says:
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    Hardy’s valued so low because you’re using ESPN player rater, remember? BA and SB.

  9. royce! says:
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    The first to solve the Mystery of Yuniesky Betancourt! Brilliant!

    You missed out on very LA evening last Friday. Got pupusas, went to an art show in a dive bar bathroom, went to Cheetah’s to watch some friends’ band, sat in traffic on the 101 late at night…what a weird place.

    Still jealous of your adventures through bbqville.

  10. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @centralohguy: There’s anagram solvers out there. Would you have finished first if you held Jeter?

    @Awesomus Maximus: Nice

    @schlitzy: Ha!

    @VinWins: Thanks!

    @OaktownSteve: Tulo was better.

    @theguarantee: Hanley’s falling to the late 2nd depending on what news comes out about his health, he’ll move up or down from there.

    @Jay: Yeah, I know.

    @royce!: Too bad I was outta town. Do it again while I’m here! The BBQ was sooooo good.

  11. @Grey: That’s uncanny it was solved so appropriately. Jeter over Dee Gordon may have won me the finals with 1 HR and 2 RBI more, but I may not have been there at all if I had not been seeded the way I was streaming Gordon/Pennington/Scutaro. Hard to say for sure given the other guys that came and went too. I’d like to think I did okay regardless. Everybody goes #2 eventually…

  12. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @centralohguy: Ha! True… Yeah, crazy how accurate his anagram is.

  13. Feeding the Abscess

    Feeding the Abscess says:
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    I’ll raise a glass for all my fellow Bartlett owners.

    A glass of tears.

  14. Wake Up says:
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    Will the Marlins be spending any $ next year with the new stadium and new skipper? And if so, does this help Hanley and Stanton?

    PS I realize that both being healthy is priority numero one-o

    I completely agree with you about Andrus. I felt like I was complaining about him all year, then you look up in Sept. and has all of his numbers. Here he is after a few rally beers…http://youtu.be/hUHaI3C39RU

  15. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Wake Up: Ha! Because the Marlins have never spent money, it just seems so unlikely. I think they’re hoping people go see Ozzie, Hanley and Stanton. Maybe they get a few small pieces like the Infante’s of the world.

  16. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Definitely. It’ll have to be somewhat soon…not sure if I get to live that life after the baby comes. Probably shouldn’t be living that life right now anyway.

  17. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: When’s the baby due?

  18. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Not until early February, but I’m starting to get the “are you going to be going out late like that when the baby comes” questioning from my better half, so it seems that I have less time than I originally imagined. So now I’m all, party time, party time: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQo98L4tHA4

  19. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Tell her if you’re out late when the baby is here, you’ll just take the baby to the bar with you. I just visited Rudy and his wife’s due November 5th. It didn’t seem like it was that close though, she was mobile and whatnot. I guess I thought she’d be belly up on the sofa.

  20. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Good call. The cha cha would be a great place to take a baby. No way you could hear the screams over the stereo and chatter.

    Good to hear that Rudy still has the time to rage (I’m just going to assume you were raging, possibly “full on,” in Austin). I’ll remind my wife of this when late January rolls around. [Me]: “Well Rudy’s wife let him!” [Wife]: “Who the hell is Rudy?” [Me (aghast)]: “You did not just ask me who Rudy is!”

    Or something like that.

    Anyhow, I’ll be in touch about next time I’m up. Doubt there will be another bathroom art show, but LA is kind of a bathroom art show as it is.

  21. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: You should name your kid Rudy or Trudy.

  22. royce! says:
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    @Grey: I’d be guaranteeing that I would have “Rudy Can’t Fail” stuck in my head for the rest of my life. A great song, but I think we’re gonna name her “Blackandyellow” instead.

  23. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Well, I have been into Louis a lot lately. It would perfectly capture a time in my life. Like a straight edge tattoo! Genius!

  24. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Never heard of them or the song. Not bad but a bit too punky for me.

  25. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Who am I kidding? We’re gonna name her “Desmondetta Jennings.”

  26. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Alright, how about Cass McCombs? He’s also going to be in southern CA sometime soon.

  27. Steve says:
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    @royce!: You know you’re having a girl?

  28. Steve says:
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    And again, so I can tick the ‘get comments by email’ box…

  29. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Yep. Just put in my order for a chastity belt with a buddy who owns a welding shop. Now I just need to go shotgun shopping…

  30. Steve says:
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    @royce!: We didn’t find out for either of our kids (two girls), but girls are great.

    Until they turn 14 and start hating you.

    At which time their mother can start dealing with them.

  31. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Glad to hear it.

    Waiting to find out is extraordinarily strong willed of you. Guess that explains how you managed to hang on to Mark Reynolds. Keep the faith!

  32. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Okay, that joke lost a bit of its oomph once I looked up Mini-Donkey’s #s. Can’t drop that power.

  33. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Indeed.

    Though the spirit-crushing slumps are about as frustrating as trying to explain to a 6 year old why she should do as she’s told ;-)

    Elsewhere, I trust that you (along with Grey and all other Razzballers) will be supporting the All Blacks when they take on France in the Rugby World Cup Final this weekend?

  34. genghis chone says:
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    Where would you feel comfortable grabbing Hanley next year? End of the second round seems like it might be a little too high for my taste, but if he seems healthy I could see pulling the trigger there.

  35. royce! says:
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    @Steve: So you’re saying that by owning Dunn, Figgy, Heyward, Choo, Liriano, Brett Anderson…I could go on…all on the same team, I’ve actually been preparing myself for parenthood? I like that. A lot.

    Check this pennant I got for decorating the baby’s room: http://www.hakes.com/images.asp?ItemNo=49402&ImageNo=001
    (I may not be prepared after all…)

    Elsewhere, go All Blacks!

  36. Steve says:
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    @royce!: I’m sure you have it all under control.

  37. Steve says:
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    @royce!: And there is some seriously cool stuff at that site. Wow.

  38. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Ha!

    @Steve: I thought girls hate their mothers when their teens not vice versa…

    @genghis chone: Will depend on his health in in the spring, but around the 2nd to 3rd round seems about right right now.

  39. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I think it’s anyone who gets in their way.

  40. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I actually just google image searched that…I bought the pennant on ebay for a lot less money. But nice catch, ’cause that site does have some insane stuff.

  41. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Yeah, but in the past designing the World Series program was like being asked to have a show at the MOMA. Not exactly our best and brightest are still designing World Series programs.

  42. Steve says:
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    @Grey: What was the deal with Moneyball? Why you no likee?

  43. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: I liked it, didn’t love it like most of the reviews. It was a bit boring, no mention of any of their pitching which was actually the reason for their success (which is a problem with the book too), Royce Clayton’s part as Tejada wasn’t big enough, don’t love Jonah Hill… I like Pitt a lot, liked his relationship with his daughter, thought the ending worked, thought the beginning worked, loved the old timey scouts…

  44. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Ah, gotcha. Yeah – I have read elsewhere about the lack of attention paid to the pitching.

    I’m assuming that Lewis deliberately left it out of the book, rather than simply being unaware of it, and thus it didn’t get any play in the movie.

    Looking forward to seeing it, though it doesn’t come out here til February!

  45. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: I remember it being mentioned in passing in the book. It makes the case for Beane being a superhero less convincing when you throw in Hudson, Mulder and Zito…

  46. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I suppose he could take some credit for drafting those guys (emoticon)

  47. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Grey: Alderson drafted Hudson, but, yeah, you’re right. I think the bigger issue is the whole Moneyball thing is about market inefficiencies, but it’s only worked when coupled with great pitchers that took the ball 100 times a year.

  48. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Hard to argue with that.

  49. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: So who you rooting for in the Series?

  50. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: And don’t say the All Blacks.

  51. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Well, of course The ABs pretty much have all my attention right now, but I do have a slight soft spot for the Cards (really only on the strength of this http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/75418.October_1964), so I guess I’m going for them.

    But won’t be in despair if it goes the other way.

    Doesn’t look to be much (starting) pitching on either side – or am I being unfair?

  52. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Considering the lead at ESPN was something like the two aces are taking the mound and it’s C.J. Wilson and Carpenter, I’d say you’re being fair.

  53. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Really? If that’s true, it’s another reason why things used to be better. I’m sounding like an old man here.

    Interesting scientific note about nostalgia. Turns out that good memories last longer than bad, so, assuming someone has a mix of experiences, they will tend to think that the distant past is always better than the recent past or current day. Of course, in the case of WS program design, its not just our minds playing tricks on us. From the article accompanying that slideshow, it seems that it all went downhill when MLB took over, instead of allowing the teams to take care of it themselves. Though that might just be a coincidence.

  54. royce! says:
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    @Grey: You’re being too hard on Wilson- he was pretty great this year. Plus he’s straight edge, so had he been on the Red Sox, they probably would have made it into the playoffs. At least their bar tabs at the game would’ve been cheaper.

  55. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Or I could’ve said our best artists are showing their work in bathrooms rather than WS programs. I had heard that before about memories, sounds like a Gladwell or Freakonomics thing. Norman Rockwell used to design the programs, now they have Norman Thisjobisbetterthanmylastonewell. Not sure if that’s his actual last name.

  56. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Wilson was great this year, but to think he’s a game one starter, I don’t know. Maybe I’m being a fussbudget.

  57. royce! says:
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    @Grey: 20th in XFIP, 22nd in FIP, 7th in WAR for all of MLB. So he’s surely not going to get the CY, but he’s been top 10 in the AL for all those stats, which beats a lot of aces, like Lester.

    He always seems like someone who could implode at any minute, though.

    Buck just said that he hasn’t looked like an ace yet.

  58. Steve says:
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    @Grey: What royce! is (perhaps most crucially) omitting to mention is that CJ helped him win the RCL Original Recipe league.

  59. royce! says:
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    Can you tell I’m rooting for the Rangers? More out of distaste for the Cardinals (was a Mets fan in 2006, and always a Padres fan, whom they have whupped in the playoffs).

  60. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: That made me think of someone probably started a website f***joebuck.com — without the asterisks. And sure enough someone did. That might be the worst contribution firejoemorgan ever gave us. All these terrible imitations.

    @Steve: In his first year he won? Geez!

  61. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Yeah, and the perception that he wasn’t great probably helped me too, because no one would trade for him, which caused me to keep him around. Probably wouldn’t draft him as high as he’ll go next year…have to wait and see if he cracks the top 100.

    Also, I traded for Carpenter in my other league and he kinda sucked.

  62. royce! says:
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    Ten starts against OAK and SEA combined probably did Wilson a lot of good, though.

  63. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Yeah. Don;t tell him, but he’s not being invited back next year.

    Seriously though, CJ did have a pretty good year, and as he once basically called ‘typical ballplayers’ out as redneck fools, he seems like a guy worth taking more than a passing interest in.

  64. royce! says:
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    Plus another 6 v. LAA. With that schedule, it’d seem that all of the Rangers starters would seem like aces.

  65. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: He also loved Lost.

  66. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Yeah, it’s a good point, their ballpark is terrible for pitching but their division makes up for it.

  67. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Is that a point in his favour? I’m not sure.

    What I am sure about is that if I looked like him and pitched in the major leagues, I wouldn’t be adhering so strictly to this straight edge thing.

  68. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: I think it’s a point in his favor. He’s a nerd, that’s always a point for a professional athlete.

  69. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Fair enough, I just never really got into it.

    And agreed on the nerd thing.

  70. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I think that his version is only no drugs or alcohol. At least I hope so, for his sake.

  71. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Speaking of nerdy things, the song the daughter sings in Moneyball is so wonderfully cheesy.

  72. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I’m with you there. I watched 1.5 seasons and stopped when I found myself screaming at the television: “that’s not how you tell a story! you have to limit possibilities! what the f**k was that smoke? where did the bear come from?!!!”

  73. royce! says:
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    @Grey: The Show song or the one at the end about being a loser?

  74. Steve says:
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    @royce!: A clear head for the pursuit – good thinking.

    @Grey: Cheese in the right dosage is good stuff.

    BTW I follow CJ on Twitter – he seems a decent guy. Certainly get more out of him than just #yahbuddy every 6 hours. Brandon McCarthy is quite a good follow too. Seems a pretty thoughtful guy – as much as you can tell from 140 characters anyways.

  75. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: @Steve: I feel like I don’t even know you two. Lost was great, if a bit out there at times.

    @royce!: The Show (Old Navy song).

  76. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Honestly, I don’t look at what anyone says on Twitter unless it’s directed at me. It’s just too noisy for me.

  77. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: @Steve: Speaking of swimsuit models, wanna see something ridiculous? My friend (who’s a girl) is roomies with this girl Dpipapnpnpap Dpaphplpgprpepnp. Remove P’s.

  78. royce! says:
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    @Grey: I know, I feel like I need to watch it again, because most of my friends are huge fans. I think I just got stuck in the second season and it probably got better later.

  79. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Eh – I was all fired up for the finale at the end of season 1, but then there were all those loose ends, and the reasons for those ends being loose just seemed to get more and more ridiculous.

  80. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!:@Steve: I watched the whole series in a matter of 6 weeks and it was the best way to go. 2nd season wasn’t good, but when you don’t have to wait a whole summer for it to start again it’s not as bad.

  81. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Interesting name…must be eastern european. Ohhhhhhh. That is ridiculous. Not quite my type, though.

  82. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Hpoplpyp sphpiptp.

  83. royce! says:
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    @Grey: You start Breaking Bad yet?

  84. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I don’t follow that many people, mainly sports journalists and the occasional hot girl.

  85. Steve says:
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    @Grey: And you of course.

  86. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: I haven’t started it yet.. Well, that’s not true. I started it last year, watched the first season then baseball season happened. I need to start again to fully appreciate it.

    @Steve: Cprpapzpy fpupcpkpipnpg hpoptp. She only drinks kale smoothies. I wish I was a kale smoothie.

  87. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Sounds like you have a lot in common!

  88. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Peas in a pod!

  89. royce! says:
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    Just looked up that F*** Joe Buck. No idea if the content is any good, because the design is freaking terrible. Brown text on a blue background?!

  90. royce! says:
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    Jinxed CJ by talking about how ace he is. My bad.

  91. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: The writing isn’t good either from what I gather from the post titles.

    @royce!: Freese is all over everything in the postseason. Crazy that Napoli might actually be drafted next year in leagues without me begging.

  92. royce! says:
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    @Grey: That’s good, so you can save your energy for convincing people to not drop him for a hot schmotato. Or trade him for a basket of schmotater tots.

    Napoli!

  93. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: And just like that! I have the magic touch, Napoli’s mom owes me.

  94. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Oh my God, the infrared camera just blew McCarver’s mind.

  95. Steve says:
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    @Grey: I’d have thought Napoli’s mother has given all of us more than enough already.

  96. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Looks like you found something to do in the off-season.

  97. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: I want specific Napoli mom consideration. It’s been more in the general sense so far.

  98. royce! says:
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    @Grey: He’s all, “I’m kind of a nerd,” because he saw the remake of the Thing. He sounds like a teenage girl, “hee hee, I’m such a nerd!”

  99. Steve says:
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    @Grey: The MILF Hunter!

  100. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I probably should’ve known not to google that.

  101. black_toshiba says:
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    Is Julio Teheran going to be classified as a rookie next year?

  102. Steve says:
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    @royce!: I promise, my character is not nearly as questionable as you’re thinking it is right now.

  103. royce! says:
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    @Grey: @Steve: You guys both have ipads? If so, are you into them? I’m still on the fence. I’m a late adopter (just got a car with a CD player).

  104. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Yeah – I’ve (I mean we’ve – the kids use it more than me) got an iPad 2.

    Really like it. Great for just sitting on the couch and browsing. Can also use it to control my Apple TV for streaming videos, music etc.

  105. Steve says:
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    @royce!: I should also say that I don’t feel like it’s going to cause me to throw out the trusty old MacBook, but it is pretty neat.

  106. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I’m thinking the Bill Bryson recommendations balance this one out. Read A Walk in the Woods and At Home, and now I’m in the middle of A Short History of Nearly Everything. Nothing in the latter blew my mind as much as the thought that a person has around 650,000 hours of life. It has made me reconsider a lot of things. Such as, “I only have 300,000 hours left. I should probably be on razzball.”

  107. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Gotta use the time wisely.

  108. Steve says:
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    Cricket has been using the infra-red cameras for a couple of years now.

  109. royce! says:
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    Here’s something that makes the WS relevant to the casual Padres fan– we traded Freese for Jim Edmonds. Towers made some great moves, so I suppose not all of them could work out.

  110. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Maybe we should just breed Predators to be umpires.

  111. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Might cut down on the arguing.

  112. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: I like it, Grey Albright, MILF Hunter! I was talking to a mother at a high school football game in Texas (Rudy thought it would be fun to reenact Friday Night Lights) and she reminded me a little of Mrs. Napoli. Hey-oh! Buck actually said that the cameras they were using were from their cricket coverage.

    @royce!: Ha!

  113. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Ha!

  114. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Did you play football in slow motion while listening to Explosions in the Sky?

  115. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: No, I wondered why I was watching high school football and thought about how young they look compared to TV high school kids.

  116. black_toshiba says:
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    Thanks Royce

  117. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Not so many Minka Kellys, eh? Probably best not.

    I’ve been to one high school football game- I was in junior high and for some reason we dropped acid and went to the local HS football game. We got bored and went back to my parents’ house where we watched our two kittens battle for what seemed like 6 hours. So the lesson is, kitten battle > HS football. Would’ve been even better with Explosions in the Sky or maybe Godspeed You Black Emperor playing. Or Mastadon!

  118. royce! says:
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    @black_toshiba: Welcome. Its 50 IP for pitchers (unless they were on the 25 man roster for 45 days or more or something like that but I don’t think he was).

  119. Steve says:
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    @royce!: I’ve led a very sheltered life.

  120. royce! says:
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    @Steve: You also haven’t watched much HS football?

  121. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Kitten battle > everything.

  122. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Or was it the kitten fights?

  123. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Come to think of it, may have been all three.

  124. royce! says:
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    @Steve: You’re missing out, man! (not on the LSD- I’m convinced that adult brains are ill-equipped for it. Or the HS football.)

  125. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: I’ve never done LSD, but my friends were doing it one random night many years ago and it happened to be the night of OJ Simpson’s Bronco chase. They were freaked, to say the least.

  126. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Wow, I would’ve been flipping my shizz about the apocalypse coming. The final horseman!:

    And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.

  127. royce! says:
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    @royce!: and with ill-fitting gloves.

  128. royce! says:
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    On to Just Desserts!

  129. royce! says:
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    Beef wellington is French?!

  130. Steve says:
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    @royce!: You’re not on acid right now, are you?

  131. chata says:
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    @Grey:

    did you and rudy come to a decision about blog-talk ?
    if so , what ??

  132. royce! says:
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    @Steve: Nope, pork, pears, and white wine, thank you very much.

  133. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Mmmmmm.

  134. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: I’m not watching Just Desserts until tomorrow so don’t ruin anything but I’m not enjoying this year as much as last year’s. The only drama is coming from someone I don’t think much of… I mean, sure, he can make the Wynn Hotel with chocolate but make something that looks tasty!

    @chata: I have a phone call with a radio producer tomorrow in the AM.

  135. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Fair enough. You been to Lukshon?

  136. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Mmmmmm.

  137. chata says:
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    @Grey:

    that’s great news …. for all of us .

    are you guys watching ‘sweet genius’ ?

    personally , i’ve found that the prettier the pastry , the less taste .
    (don’t read too much into this ^) .

  138. royce! says:
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    @Steve: I know, huh? But for that sort of $, I need to get an expert’s advice. Grey apparently is the only expert I know.

  139. Steve says:
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    @royce!: Looks kinda like a place I went when I was in Sydney a couple of weeks ago. If it’s as good as that, it’s awesome.

  140. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: I wanted to say yes until I looked Lukshon up and I don’t think so. Also, I think I’d remember if I had. Why do you ask?

    @chata: I’m watching Sweet Genius and it’s off the scales for unintentional comedy. The judge reminds me of Dr. Evil.

    @royce!: Pretty crazy. You have to pitch really well to be in all of those and just barely lose, otherwise they’d stop sending you out there.

  141. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Re: Lukshon- I was wondering because I have been to Father’s Office a few times and enjoyed it and its the same dude, so I was thinking of eating there when in LA.

    Re: CJ- yep. Not the best record to set, though, especially when you don’t have beer to help you forget.

  142. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Didn’t realize it was the Father’s Office guy. That’s where I heard of it before. I like the Father’s Office but the crowd is douchey (like that’s hard to find in LA) and I don’t like the no substitute policy, makes me think the chef is a douche too. Overall, just not crazy about the vibe. Enjoy Umami’s burgers better too.

  143. chata says:
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    @Grey:

    yeah , your Dr. Evil dude’s humor is aided by his accent .
    and he obviously knows what he saying , though the chefs may not .
    of course , now that i’m no longer in the casino biz , i can find
    much humor in a good accent .
    like the episode where morimoto’s right-hand man became the genius .
    very funny …. plus he was quite animated .

    your phone call bring you any positive vibes ?
    if this all comes about , you’re going to have to do a ‘returning vets’
    show …. which means you’re going to have to start dating “ice cream”
    girl again …. still have her number ??
    though , i’m sure you have sampled many flavors of ice cream , since .

  144. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @chata: Ha! Yeah, the Morimoto one was great. I’m not sure either of them understood the other. I’m sure I can get ice cream girl on the line, but not sure what she would add to the show except maybe to tell me how I was wrong about everything. Snap! No, that’s not true. Getting on the phone again on Monday with Rudy and this radio show producer. So far, so good.

  145. royce! says:
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    @Grey: I hear ya. My wife and I went there a few times when she worked at William Morris. So she was acclimated to douchery, and I just didn’t know that it was possible to avoid it in that part of town.

  146. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: It’s hard to avoid it with the crowds, so I’ve come to expect that. I think my bigger issue is when I feel like the owner is a douche and I’m giving them money. I like how he makes a hamburger, and I probably wouldn’t change a thing to it, but I don’t like that it’s not even an option.

  147. royce! says:
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    @Grey: It’s definitely hard to want to patronize a place when you know or have heard the owner is an ass. I recently discovered that one of the better bars down here is owned by a complete dickwad (the people who told me this also said, “but he is really good at business,” like that would make me want to give him more money). I think from now on I’m going to stop people before they tell me these sorts of things.

    Anyhow, a good friend waits tables at Umami in Santa Monica, so I doubt I’ll be going back to Father’s Office again.

  148. royce! says:
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    @Grey: Which Umami do you go to? If the Santa Monica one, and you go there often, I bet you would be able to identify my friend were I to provide a few choice descriptors.

  149. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Nah… I go to the original on La Brea or the one by the Arclight. Never been to the SM one.

  150. Steve says:
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    @royce!: @Grey: You guys are making me hungry.

  151. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: The way this hamburger place Umami is spreading, it’ll be in NZ by lunch time.

  152. royce! says:
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    Berkman’s swing looks like my 69 year old father-in-law’s golf swing. Has it always looked like that?

  153. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Yup, that’s how he swings. Maybe it used to be more like a 40 year old golfer.

  154. Steve says:
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    @royce!: @Grey: I do like the way Berkman puts the bat down after he hits a home run – gently and with great care.

  155. royce! says:
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    I am confident that this will unleash a shizz-load of runs, but I am just loving how low scoring this WS has been so far. Not because I’m a purist “pitcher’s duel” sort of guy, but because I read so much about how this WS could break the record for most runs scored. Baseball: EMBRACE THE CHAOS!

  156. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Understated panache.

    @royce!: Was the story being reported about this series? Guess I could see it, hadn’t read that though.

  157. chata says:
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    @Grey:

    rzep … on my roster the past 2 years .
    never pitched this good for me .
    had him as a starter , though .

  158. chata says:
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    as far as world series sponsors go … Jennie-O turkey burgers ?
    no thanks .

    at a buck and change/lb , if i want turkey , i buy a turkey .

    actually just bought a turkey two days ago .
    my wife always laughs at me and tells other people that it’s
    my “practice” turkey .
    seems that , as long as anyone can remember , come october ,
    like clock-work , i get the urge for a turkey dinner .

    maybe i should have her re-name it my “mock” thanksgiving turkey ,
    but i wouldn’t want someone to mistake it for tofu .

  159. chata says:
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    chicken shizz !!

    you gotta send kinsler home , there .

  160. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @chata: That would be tofurkey.

  161. royce! says:
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    @Grey: I mean, I would have predicted exactly the same thing if I were in the prediction biz. I just enjoy how baseball can prove even the best analysts wrong.

  162. royce! says:
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    @Grey: or fauxfurkey. Hmm…just realized that might have been what they were thinking of when they named it that.

  163. black_toshiba says:
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    What type of numbers are you expecting from Kendry Morales this upcoming year? (If Kendry Morales comes back this year)
    You think a 25HR 80RBI & .265AVG is in reach?
    Thanks

  164. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @royce!: Yeah, makes sense, just hadn’t read it. That was the best episode of Just Desserts so far. I think it should be mandatory that every restaurant have a dessert that looks like an entree.

  165. royce! says:
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    @Grey: I’m not usually into dessert, so almost all of those looked amazing. Especially the beef wellington and the cuban sandwich. Despite how unappetizing the paella looked, I thought they’d keep him around just for the sake of entertainment.

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