Don't be shellfish...Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+

Yesterday, we went over the top 20 shortstops for 2013 fantasy baseball and today we (hint:  it’s in the title) go over the top 20 3rd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.  We should call all the 2013 fantasy baseball rankings where in the world is Marco Scutaro and Martin Prado?  Marco…Prado!  It’s like the Italian guy who went to Asia and brought back knockoff designer handbags.  Now, this is not that we like them, and by “we” I mean me, but due to their flexibility on the chart of 2013 fantasy baseball position eligibility, we can compare and contrast where they are to get an idea of how shallow or deep positions are.  Prado was 16th for the 2nd basemen, 12th for shortstops and 19th for 3rd basemen.  Then Scutaro was 21st for 2nd basemen, 22nd for shortstops and 24th here.  Quickly we could surmise, shortstops are light on top, but bigger in the middle and at the end.  3rd basemen are heavy on top and in the middle while light on the end.  2nd basemen are heavy on top, but light in the middle and at the end.  Or shortstops are big-booty’d women, 2nd basemen are Playmates and 3rd basemen are the zaftig, voluptuous, BBW or simply Billy Butler.  So, that all sounded much better in my head.  As always, my projections and tiers are noted.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball:

1. Miguel Cabrera – Cabrera’s projections were at the top 10 for 2013 fantasy baseball.

2. Evan Longoria – Longoria’s projections were at the top 20 for 2013 fantasy baseball.

3. Adrian Beltre – Beltre’s projections were at the top 20 for 2013 fantasy baseball.

4. Ryan Zimmerman – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Sandoval.  I call this tier, “They’ve all burned me before but I’m not bitter, thanks to my shrink.”  My shrink, Dr. Fefferschtepper, says I have to learn to calm myself.  I have to learn to forgive.  I need to stop thinking that every time a player fails to leave up to expectations that it’s some kind of personal affront to me.  I have to learn that when a player does live up to expectations after INEXPLICABLY not doing anything the first three months of the season and then going on a barrage of production over the final three months to save their entire season right after I drop them that it’s not meant personally.  That Ryan Zimmerman didn’t mean to hit only 5 homers through the end of June, then ten homers in July.  Well, you could’ve fooled me, but I’ll go on that touchy-feely perception of events and pretend Zimmerman isn’t a total jackass sent directly from Planet Screw-Up-Grey with one mission in mind.  See, how well I’ve healed?  2013 Projections:  88/27/108/.293/6

5. David Wright – It was a uncharacteristically warm January day in 2011 when I said David Wright just hit 29 homers in 2010 and now he was ready to take an even bigger step for next season.  Well, that worked out great!  He’s now hit 35 homers over the last two seasons combined or in just over 1100 plate appearances.  But I’m no longer bitter about that.  Nor am I bitter that I told everyone to sell him last May to then get grief about it for the next 4 months, even though his production did steadily decline in the final four months.  Not bitter at all.  I sound healthy!  2013 Projections:  88/24/102/.286/15

6. Pablo Sandoval – Coming off a 2009 where he hit 25 homers, it was reasonable to think he’d repeat in 2010.  He then hit 13 homers.  Coming off a 23-homer 2011, it was reasonable to think he’d– He hit 12 homers last year!  So he does well one year, then disappoints the next, and vice versa.  I got the pattern.  So he’s coming off a 12-homer season, which would be disappointing, but then he hit about that many homers in the postseason, so it doesn’t seem like his 2012 was as disappointing as it was.  So does that mean he will or won’t disappoint?  Or will he just break another hamate bone?  Or will he break his front teeth on a ham bone?  Please, Ben Zobrist’s wife, write a song to God and ask these questions for me.  2013 Projections:  84/25/90/.289/3

7. Aramis Ramirez – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Lawrie.  I call this tier, “I’m worried about this tier.  Perhaps irrationally so.  Who’s irrational?  Me?”  Aramis is going to be 35 years old in June.  I don’t tell you this so you can set your iCal reminder to send him an e-card.  At some point, the wheels are gonna come off.  Now it will either be a slow, steady decline where we get 25 homers this year, 22 homers next year and then we’re praying for 20 homers the following year but only get 12.  Or maybe the wheels come off this year and then he struggles to get the wheels back on for a few years until he retires.  Or maybe he’s going to get better at the age of 35 like Barry Bonds, Rafael Palmeiro and Mark McGwire.  Emoticon with a needle sticking into its butt.  2013 Projections:  72/24/87/.277/3

8. Brett Lawrie – Obviously, Lawrie said something nasty to Dwayne Murphy and Murph didn’t share with him the special homer sauce that he gave to Bautista and Encarnacion.  If I were Dwayne Murphy and Dwayne Murphy were still the Blue Jays hitting coach, I’d tell Lawrie to stop hitting every pitch into the GEE DEE ground.  Super-friendly hops aside, ground balls are not how you hit home runs.  His 50.2% GB rate was up there with such homer stalwarts as Ichiro, Daniel Murphy and Jemile Weeks.  Emphasis on “warts.”  He needs to drop that rate to around 45% and raise his fly ball rate (which was 29.8%) to around 34%.  All doable things.  If he does that, he’ll hit 15 homers even with a terrible 9 % HR/FB rate as it was last year.  If he raises that just a tad, he hits 20 homers.   The steals are another whole set of question marks.  He has speed, but 13 steals and 8 times caught as it was last year isn’t gonna cut the cheese.  Isn’t gonna butter the biscuits and definitely isn’t gonna mustard up the frankfurter.  Last year was a lost year.  He could easily turn things around a’la Heyward from 2011 to 2012, but there’s no guarantees here.  2013 Projections:  74/17/83/.278/14

9. Todd Frazier – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Machado.  I call this tier, “I irrationally like these guys.  But, just so we’re clear, I’m so not irrational.  Right?”  I already went over my Todd Frazier 2013 fantasy.  I wrote it while watching a Three’s Company rerun and trying to figure out if it was still okay to be attracted to Suzanne Somers even though she’s now 66 years old.  2013 Projections:  72/29/89/.268/5

10. Mike Moustakas – People seem oddly down on Moustakas this year, in the non-sexual way.  Last year, his line was 69/20/73/.242/5.  Throw the average out.  He’s more a .260 hitter.  He hits a ton of fly balls, which isn’t great for his average, but he could hit 30 homers with better contact and an uptick in his HR/FB rate.  At 24 years old, I could see Moustakas easily taking another step forward.  2013 Projections:  75/25/92/.259/3

11. Will Middlebrooks – I already went over my Will Middlebooks 2013 fantasy.  I wrote it slathered in Marshmallow Fluff.  2013 Projections:  68/22/82/.278/8

12. Manny Machado – I gots some love for this tier, huh?  Here’s my Manny Machado 2013 fantasy.  2013 Projections:  72/19/81/.274/12

13. Pedro Alvarez – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Prado.  I call this tier, “I’m missing you (Tiers of a Clown).”  I might do a post about this, but let’s talk quickly about cusp hitters.  I look at players that start the tiers between favored tiers and unfavorable tiers as cusp hitters.  They were almost in a more favorable tier, but ended up starting off the less favorable tier.  Some cusp hitters over the last few rankings posts are Asdrubal, Infante, Utley, Jed Lowrie and Ryan Howard.  Cusp hitters are not as unfavorable as other guys in the tier.  Cusp sayin’.  Alvarez is as terrible as Mark Reynolds and Adam Dunn for Ks and, ergo, henceforth, vis-a-vis batting average.  I hear what you’re saying, “Grey, you’re handsome as always today, but what I don’t understand is you’ve liked Reynolds and Dunn in the past, even with their average, but you’re down on Alvarez?  That seems like a double standard.  Is Alvarez not donkey-ish enough for you?”  I liked, neigh, loved Mini Donkey when I thought he could steal 15 bases.  Big Donkey had my admiration, bray, support, when I trusted him to hit .240 and 40 homers.  Alvarez has no speed, and doesn’t look like a 40 homer hitter.  2013 Projections:  60/27/81/.245/1

14. David Freese – He probably doesn’t deserve to be in this tier.  There’s no reason to worry about Freese.  Or just no Freason, if portmanteaus tease your buddy like your right leg.  Except his past injury history.  Last year, he was more or less fine, playing in 144 games, which is excellent for a Cardinals team that is carrying on La Russa’s tradition of making sure even the 12th man off the bench gets 50 ABs.  If Freese gets another 500 ABs, he’ll have basically the exact same season as he just had minus a couple homers due to an inflated HR/FB rate in 2012.   2013 Projections:  74/18/90/.297/3

15. Hanley Ramirez – Hanley’s projections were at the top 20 shortstops for 2013 fantasy baseball.

16. Trevor Plouffe – Let’s say that Plouffe had a good year in 2012.  I’m not saying that, but let’s say it.  His line was 56/24/55/.235/1.  An off year by Ryan Ludwick just called and pfft’d.  When Ryan Ludwick’s off year is pfft’ing that’s an issue.  “I don’t know why this is about me,” said Ryan Ludwick’s Off Year.  There was a reason why Plouffe came out of nowhere last year.  In four years at Triple-A — yes, I said four — he put up around a .260 average.  The Twins didn’t exactly have Mike Schmidt diddling himself at 3rd during this time.  Plouffe just looked like a Quad-A guy with some power.  He still looks like that.  Sorry, I’m not trying to blow up his spot.  He can do that himself.  Plouffe goes the dynamite!  2013 Projections:  65/22/72/.244/2

17. Chase Headley – Headley disappointed me because of what he did do rather than didn’t do.  Bluntly, how do you go from four homers in 2011 to 31?  As an experiment, did Petco move in their fences last year for just Headley, and, after it was a success, decide to move in the fences for everyone this year?  Were the fences on a dolly?  Were the fences on the backs of cloned sheep named Dolly?  I don’t know, guys and four girls, but this sudden boost in power has me tentative.  His HR/FB% has me more tentative.  His 31% FB rate has me tentativer.  His increasing ground ball rate has me really tentatively tentativer.  His three “Lucky” homers and 11 “Just Enough” homers, which was fourth most in the majors, has me the most tentativest.  The fences moving in at Petco could remove some of Headley’s lost power, but won’t completely fix all my tentativiousness.  UPDATE: You win some, you lose thumb.  He’s out a month with a fractured thumb.  2013 Projections:  60/15/78/.271/9

18. Kyle Seager – Already went over Seager’s projections in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

19. Martin Prado – Already went over Prado’s projections in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

20. Mark Reynolds – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Polanco.  I call this tier, “Your slightly older brother’s 3rd basemen.”  Already went over Reynolds’s projections in the top 20 1st basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

21. Kevin Youkilis – Already went over Youkilis’s projections in the top 20 1st basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

22. Michael Young – Already went over Young’s projections in the top 20 1st basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

23. Alex Rodriguez – When it was announced A-Rod had “granny hip,” I went over my Alex Rodriguez 2013 fantasy.  2013 Projections:  40/13/44/.263/6 in 300 ABs

24. Marco Scutaro – Already went over Scutaro’s projections in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball.

25. Placido Polanco – I was thinking I’ve never seen such a terrible tier of players before, then Crapolanco has to go and up the ante.  Or maybe that’s down the ante.  Maybe I’m just anti-Polanco.  2013 Projections:  74/5/52/.268/4

26. Jedd Gyorko – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Stewart.  I call this tier, “Upside, but more question marks than the Riddler’s leotards.” I already went over my Jedd Gyorko 2013 fantasy.  Go read it, Gyorko!  2013 Projections:  60/18/70/.265/4 (assuming an everyday job)

27. Chris Johnson – Here’s what I said when the Diamondbacks signed Eric Chavez, “D’Backs signed him to platoon with Chris Johnson.  That’s the Chris Johnson who doesn’t need a platoon partner.  Yay.”  I was shining up a Chris Johnson sleeper post prior to the Chavez signing.  Then Johnson is sent to the Braves with Upton and I start to feel a giddiness coming up from deep in my nethers.  I say, nethers, you got something good for me.  Nethers, “No, Juan Francisco is Johnson’s new platoon partner.”  He would’ve been up near the 15th ranked guy if it wasn’t for Francisco, so I like him as a flyer.  In 44 games with the D’Backs, he had 7 homers, and he hit 4 homers and .245 vs. lefties last year, but 11 homers and .295 vs. righties, which makes him puzzling as a platoon partner with Juan-Fran.  2013 Projections:  44/13/48/.274/4

28. Juan Francisco – I probably would’ve wrote a sleeper post about Juan Francisco, too.  Yes, I left my heart in Juan Francisco.  His major drawback is the aforementioned Chris Johnson platoon.  If he weren’t platooned, I’d give him the line of 60/25/78/.248/3.  In a platoon… 2013 Projections:  51/16/54/.251/2

29. Lonnie Chisenhall – He’s all ready for the breakout, or so everyone thought two years ago, then bupkis.  Chisenhall should be the starting 3rd baseman, but Aviles is lurking there to step in and prospblock at any point.  Also, Jonny Gomes’s brother, Yan, might step in to steal some 3rd base ABs.  Chisenhall is hideous vs. lefties.  In his career vs. the ones that can’t use the regular scissors, he’s hitting .227 in 88 ABs.  If the Indians go to a Lonnie/Yannie platoon, it’ll kill both of their values.   2013 Projections: 59/16/79/.253/3

30. Josh Donaldson – He couldn’t even stick with the A’s last year, hitting .153 through his first 28 games.  From April to June, he had one walk.  He couldn’t hit the ball even if he was swinging with his dad Sam Donaldson’s eyebrows.  When he returned, he looked like a new man, hitting .290 with 8 homers in 176 2nd half ABs.  His September (4 homers, .257 in 101 ABs) looks repeatable.  Unfortunately, I’m not convinced his April through June aren’t repeatable, as well.  2013 Projections:  58/16/68/.258/4

31. Ian Stewart – I didn’t nickname Stewart Mini Mini Donkey without serious donkey-introspection.  I touched my inner donkey and sprayed donkey juice all over Stewart, which is illegal in 49 of 50 states — thanks, Vermont, for hearing me out!  Like Reynolds and Dunn (when they were younger), Stewart could hit bombs, steal some bases and hit for a terrible average.  Now Stewart looks like he might be lucky to get ten homers, a .220 average and a full season of at-bats.  2013 Projections:  42/17/54/.239/4

After the top 29 3rd basemen, there’s a bunch of names (Matt Dominguez, anyone?), but here’s two that stand out:

Josh Vitters – When he was called up last year, I said, “He comes with high expectations simply because Cubs fans are like a 104-year-old virgin who would just love to touch the playoffs’ boobies.  He has solid power and this year he’s finally taking a free pass in the minors (not dramatically, but he’s been better — 30 BBs in 439 PAs).  The Cubs have no reason not to let him play 3rd for the final two months and have said that.”  And that’s me quoting me!  Oh, and the Cubs did play him, and he looked like hot poop left on your dashboard in the sun overnight.  (The car is in Alaska where there’s sun at night in the summer, and it’s a common custom to leave poop on your car dashboard in Alaska.  Google it if you don’t believe me, but you would hurt my feelings if you didn’t just take my word for it.)  2013 Projections:  38/12/47/.249/3

From Around The Web

  1. Steve says:
    (link)

    We need Alaskan native p0rk burn to fact check that poop business for us.

    Also, the dynamite going Plouffe reminded me to go check out the glossary again, more particularly the vocalizations of many of the terms by Awesomus Minimus.

    Go check ‘em out, ya’ll. They’re adorable.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Steve: No, you don’t, Steve… You trust me on that one, true as the driven snow… Yeah, we gotta get Minimus to provide some more…

  2. Worm Turner says:
    (link)

    Surprised to Zim so high seeing as he had shoulder surgery, anyone know if he’s expected to be back by April?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Worm Turner: He was fine as early as December… Wasn’t major surgery…

  3. DrEasy says:
    (link)

    Happy belated birthday, Grey! A daiquiri was sent your way via my gf’s Paypal, and she decided to add another daiquiri once she saw your mustache.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @DrEasy: Thanks, Doc! I bet she did…

  4. 2 Giant rings says:
    (link)

    I like Sandoval as the value pick at 3rd base this year. He may outproduce Longoria. Two Hand surgeries sapped his power the last two seasons. He has no hamate bones left to break. At age 26 and coming off a strong post season , I’m hopeful 2013 is his career year to date. 34/.320

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @2 Giant rings: 34 homers from him? That would be very valuable, seems way outside the upper reaches of his ability… Unless he goes to Toronto to work with Dwayne Murphy…

      • jimbo says:
        (link)

        @Grey:
        If you take his best hr rate (2011) with his best plate appearance total (2009) that prorates to 31.2. Weak analysis, but i think he is capable of more than people think because of the health issues.

        Add a dash of luck/improvement and he’s got a shoot at 34. I’ve owned him all or part of the last two years and have a sense of his season within a season. The wrist issues held him back, and he was a different player when healthy.

        I’m taking the over on him as long as he doesn’t look too blimplike in ST.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Yeah, he’s capable, but he’s gotta do it, that’s the catch…

  5. costaricanchata says:
    (link)

    you’ve referenced the “Scooter” issue , previously .
    maybe kiwi Steve can help you “work” on that , the same way that he’s helped you forgive hosmer .
    just a thought .

    anywho , the Scooter thing reminds me of : “sheldon cooper is a smelly pooper” .
    is there any way that you can work ‘smelly pooper’ into your glossary ?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @costaricanchata: O, you watch Big Bang Theory? Never would’ve took you for a viewer of that…

      • Steve says:
        (link)

        @Grey: What’s this Scooter thing you need help with?

        Big Bang Theory? Sorry – I just don’t get that show I’m afraid. One of the least funny ‘comedies’ on TV IMHO.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I saw half of one episode once, I’m not sure I get it either… Then again I watched 20 hours of 30 for 30’s this weekend so I veer towards that that pretends to be real… Loved the Iverson on, btw… I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t know he served time…

  6. Commish Cauda says:
    (link)

    Which 1B would you rather have for the next 5 years?

    Goldy, Ike Davis, Rizzo or Trumbo?

    • Commish Cauda says:
      (link)

      @Commish Cauda:

      Might as well add Yonder Alonzo and Brandon Belt to the list too. Thanks.

  7. Medlenin says:
    (link)

    In a keeper league, Trumbo or Espinosa, each would have an additional potential year to be kept beyond next year.

    10 team: C, 1B, 2B, SS, 3B, MI, IF, LF, CF, RF, OF, UTIL – R, HR, RBI, SB, AVG, OPS.

    Have Heyward, Medlen and Desmond as other keepers. Picks 1, 5, 13 in rounds 1 and 2, no third round because of trades.

  8. AA says:
    (link)

    If I have a 1B, 2B, 3B, OF, and Matt Cain what positions should I concentrate on when I make my first two picks at #12 and #13?

    • AA says:
      (link)

      I should note that its a 5 player keeper league…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @AA: What does your league and team look like? 5 OFs? 12 team? You have Uggla at 2nd?

      • AA says:
        (link)

        Its a 12 team league with R, RBI, HR, S, Avg, and OPS on offense and the typical pitching categories including CG’s. We start a LF, CF, RF, and Utility position along with one at each of the infield positions. My keepers are Pujols, Cano, Miggy, Trout, and Cain…slightly better then Uggla!!! My team is solid and its a competitive league. I drafted Cano and Miggy 4 years ago. I traded for Pujols around the All Star break last year. I picked up Trout from waivers..thanks to you Grey, and I drafted Cain last year. I won the league and therefore have the 12th and 13th picks. Obviously I’m not taking a catcher or shortstop so that leaves OF or SP…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Slightly Better Than Uggla would be a good pop-rock band name…

  9. Laguna Bob says:
    (link)

    @Grey…..would love to get your opinion on my early keeper quandry. Im in a 10 team league, standard 5×5 roto, standard MI/CM/5OF/9P roster. We can keep up to 10 players. Not worrying about years, contract $$ amounts, my keeper list looks like the following:
    – Pujols, Cano, Reyes, Pedroia, Rizzo, Ellsbury, Bulter (qualifies at 1b and OF in our league, very odd but DHs qualifiy at OF in our league), Bourn, Cespedes Cl Lee, Bumgarner, Greinke, Medlen

    I’m going to package Greinke, Medlen and then 2 of the following (Pedroia, Butler, Bourn) to acquire Strasburg. My question to you, out of Pedroia, Butler and Bourn, which 1 should I be aiming to keep? All are on very similar contracts, so pretty much, with my roster make up, which one would you rather own for the next 3 years?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Keep Pedroia… You’re giving a lot for Strasburg…

  10. Big Magoo

    Big Magoo says:
    (link)

    Looks like you might give Zim another chance this year, eh? I definitely agree to try and grab a 2B early and wait on SS this year. I think there are some decent options at third in the middle rounds though. Btw, I know that you love Rutledge this year, but did you see that he had 9 walks in almost a half season? He makes Howie Kendrick look like Barry Bonds in terms of plate discipline.

      • Big Magoo

        Big Magoo says:
        (link)

        @Grey: @Grey: Oops, forgot that you did a sleeper post on him. The third commenter basically voiced the same concerns that I have about him. As far as the hot corner goes, there’s a lot of risk at the top it seems – age (Beltre, Aramis), injuries (Longo, Wright, Zimm, Sandoval), track record (Headley, Lawrie). If I miss out on Miggy, I might just wait to see who falls or grab a couple of guys in the Frazier tier.

  11. Big AL says:
    (link)

    Grey come out of the closet. Grey it’s planet BITTER calling (Hosmer). It’s time to do the 3B rankings.(Zimmerman). Everything will be fine .(Hosmer) Remember don’t look under the bed.(Zimmerman).All your 3B rankings will be right on the money this year Grey.(Hosmer) Except for everyone pass Miggy.(Zimmerman) We’re a little worried about your fascination for young 3B men.(Hosmer) And don’t worry about fantasying about Suzanne Sommers.We all use her Thigh Masters while having sex here on the planet BITTER.(Zimmerman).So come to the light Grey (Hosmer) It’s all going to be all right this year.(Hosmer,Zimmerman,Wright,Sandoval) Yeah it’s a nice bitter day,on planet BITTER.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That was sour… Emoticon…

  12. B.O.B says:
    (link)

    Great job with the rankings as always, but your low projections for Headley has made me reconsider him as a keeper. The terms “lucky” and “just enough” dont make me feel all warm and fuzzy…at least not in this context.

    10 team – standard keeper league , which 3 should I keep based on round that they can be kept?
    Billy Butler – 12th
    Asdrubal Cabrera – 15th
    Kris Medlen – 19th
    Chase Headley – 18th
    Bryce Harper – 16th

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Headley, Harper, Butler…

  13. OaktownSteve says:
    (link)

    In the last two years Aramis Ramirez has played exactly 149 games. He had 626 then 630 PAs, 565 and 570 ABs, 26 and 27 HRs, .308 and .310 BABIP, .306 and .300 Avg, 6.9 and 7.0 BB%. He saw a slight uptick in runs and RBIs due to a better line up with the Brewers and he cut out some of the pop ups and he stole a few bags last year. But really he’s put up almost identical years. There doesn’t seem to be any sign of him slowing up. He’s been really consistent for the bulk of his career. I think there’s no way he goes in the toilet unless he has a major injury.

    Wright, Beltre, Longoria, Hanley going 2nd round and Zimm, Headley, Sandoval and Lawrie all in front of him and his numbers are really competetive if not better than all of them. Hard to think of a more underrated guy in fake baseball.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @OaktownSteve: Yeah, I hear ya… I owned him last year on the same team as Zimmerman, and Aramis not only outperformed him (for my team), but caused so few headaches with steady production that I have a mild crush on him… He was the true essence of set it and forget it…

  14. Mr. Gray… Top 3 is perfect… This is a tough group to post up… Again, another Razzball – Good Job!!!

    I don’t care for fatso players, but, Panda intrigues me for Yahoo style play – if he has really sunk so low – seems a general tout trend too… His injuries can afford you the opportunity to fill in for him to pump your numbers for need – power or average – when he is missing..

    Mr. Miyagi loves his type… He’ll be poking me in the ribs during draft to take him until he’s gone… If he still is there come the 6th or 7th round… It could get painful… That little Mr. Miyagi pokes hard…

    A bunch of the younger guys are quite interesting … I never had your expectations for Alvarez … So, my undies were never twisted and I’m not bitter about him now…. But, he does power streak well… Worthy of keeping an eye on for a plug-in or 2…

    Frazier is still drawing me in… And I’m older, so, speaking of Suzanne Somers and kicking the can down the road a bit to that purchased “Look”…

    It brings me to Tentativest???…. Is being a “tentativest” anything like being a metrosexual??? I will assume for the purpose of discussion, it is here…

    So, I’ve got a couple questions for you (Really more.. But, I realize my posts have a degree of turgidity about them in this Twitter world we find ourselves in… Therefore, I will limit them for briefness sake.. I could go on all day about this – assuming the same from you too) …

    What male makeup product line are you currently using (Has to be organic and hypoallergenic for me)???

    Do you botox???

    As nail length is increasing for fashionable men, have you found it bothers you – given the amount of time you spend on the keyboard??? ((I wonder (bringing it back to baseball), how fashionable ballplayers will be dealing with this issue on the field – artificial nails???))

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @t moore: Don’t hate the fat player, hate the society that gives him such tasty bedtime snacks… Alvarez could be the kind of player that hits .220 and kills your team… My medicine cabinets are filled with nothing but andro and over the counter supplements… I do not botox MY FACE… My nails are long like the old Asian man in Guiness Book of World Records, but I have a team of monkeys typing for me, so it works…

  15. Grease Lightning says:
    (link)

    Thanks as always for the rankings. It seems that 3b is pretty deep this season. Do you think you will be drafting guys like Beltre early on when you could get Middlebrooks 100+ picks later with a relatively negligible difference in their projected statistics?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d draft Beltre if he’s there where I have him overall… I’d happily take Middlebrooks for my corner infielder slot too… I wouldn’t pass Beltre thinking I’d get the same from Middlebrooks. You could get the same, but Middlebrooks has much more risk attached…

      • OaktownSteve says:
        (link)

        @Grey: @Grey:

        Reminds me of an old joke. Editor says to writer, “you know how they say put an infinite number of monkeys at an infinite number of typewriters and eventually one of them will write Hamlet? Your book I figure one monkey, a day and half.”

        Another quick one. This guy Artie Lang (don’t know much about him, guess he was on Stern?) was on the field before a Yankee game making a bunch of blue comments and John Sterling, who has no idea who this Lang character is was amused by him and jokingly says, “Who let you down here?”

        Lang shoots back, “I won a Suzyn Waldman look alike contest.”

        And without missing a beat Sterling goes, “There is a strong resemblence.”

        • OaktownSteve says:
          (link)

          @OaktownSteve:

          meant for above Re: typing monkeys

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Ha and HA! I wonder how Suzyn dealt with the Clemens trial…

          • OaktownSteve says:
            (link)

            @Grey:

            Tears obviously. I feel like the only person in America who enjoys the John and Suzyn pair. I wonder how they manage to stay employed.

            If I were to answer my own question I’d have to say “old people listen to the radio.”

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              I like the radio, but only when in the car and when I don’t have to listen to terrestrial radio… Not sure where I fit in…

              • OaktownSteve says:
                (link)

                @Grey:

                This could be me: standing in my back yard in September burning my garbage, holding a transistor radio with a white ear piece rather than headphones, occassionally I’d duck in the garage for a shot of Wild Turkey and I’d mutter stuff to myself like “goddammit the Clevelands are murderin’ us.” I would definitely be smoking.

                So I also don’t know where I fit in.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Corn cob pipe or chewing tobacco? Should be able to place you with that info…

                  • OaktownSteve says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey:

                    Winstons

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      The picture is now clear!

  16. Simon says:
    (link)

    3OF league, 5×5. I can keep four who do I keep?
    Rizzo, Billy Butler, Jarrod Parker, Morrow, Motte, Rios ,Allen Craig, Alcides Escobar, Austin Jackson.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Rizzo, Butler, Morrow, Jackson… Can see going different ways if the league is shallow… I’m not sure how deep yours is…

  17. 2 Giant rings says:
    (link)

    20 team 5×5. I have the 20th pick and the #1 priority on waivers. I can trade up to the 12th pick. I’d do it for sure if I could get Fielder at 12 but I’m guessing he’d be gone. More likely I’d get J. Upton at 12. Would you stick with pick 20/21 or trade up?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Trade up…

  18. TheNewGuy says:
    (link)

    Yup had Zimm too and nearly cut him like you did. Luckily had deep benches so let him ride the pine until he finally found his mojo. Happens to me though, we all have our guys we hate as they stunk it up for us. I had Hamels for him ugly 09, and Lester for his shizztastic 12, not to mention our last year favourite Lawrie last year. All leave a bitter taste in your mouth, not gonna be drafting those guys anytime soon thats for sure.

    Anyway good work and funny as always! Agree with a lot of these rankings too. 3rd sackers seem fairly deep this year.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Thanks! Yeah, it’s better than it’s been, until five of the top six guys crap the bed and we’re screaming bloody murder…

  19. slew says:
    (link)

    I’m guessing you will have to revise your rankings for the Top 20 Outfielders now that Delmon
    Young has signed with the Phillies.
    Will Darinn Ruf’s playing time suffer because of this?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha… I don’t think Ruf was a legitimate contender anyway…

  20. Steve says:
    (link)

    Dodgers do a deal with Time Warner Cable that’s worth $7-8billion to the team.

    This is all gearing up for a massive calamity isn’t it?

    • Jack Full of Hate says:
      (link)

      @Steve: as a past of the LA market and historically a fan, its crazy because time warner and direct tv don’t like each other very much. the new deals are crazy. I’m actually prepared to play fantasy baseball this year without actually watching a baseball game.

        • Jack Full of Hate says:
          (link)

          @Steve: I have slowly watched less and less over the years, i don’t actually care for it as much as I did when I was a kid. I think the evolution of the game is not great and teams are all about protecting their product and not just going out there and kicking some ass. but to romanticize something because of childish love is a lie I won’t tell myself, thats why i like fantasy because its my team, my way about a game that means something to me on a childish level, a fanatsy you might say.

          • Steve says:
            (link)

            @Jack Full of Hate: I’d like to watch more, but it’s a time/opportunity thing. “Everyone be quiet while Dad lies on the sofa for 3 hours to watch baseball.”

              • Steve says:
                (link)

                @Grey: I don’t know if I can handle that much awesomeness.

                Who’s the geezer with the shirt? Someone I should know – or a random?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Pauly Shore…

                  • Steve says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: Crikey. The big time!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Hahahaha… I told her to get celebrities in the shirt and she got Pauly Shore… Oh, well…

              • Steve says:
                (link)

                @Grey: He’s not wearing Blue-Blockers is he?

              • Jack Full of Hate says:
                (link)

                @Grey: I guess Pauly shore is not dead, thats awesome, now we just need to get Keitel in the shirt and we have made it. are you open to any public figure promoting Razzball?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  I’ll take any public figure, for sure… I mean, I took Pauly Shore, right?

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: hey it could have been Dave Coulier

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      True… Then Alanis would’ve got jealous…

                  • Steve says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: Awwww, sorry man. I didn’t mean to come off all disparaging. Pauly’s not one of my faves, but a public figure holding your goods is always cool.
                    Wait, that didn’t come out quite right…

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      I didn’t take like that at all… It is after all Pauly Shore…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Somebody’s gotta pay for that pitching staff…

  21. Jack Full of Hate says:
    (link)

    not trying to be hateful but realistic here, after the coverage of this seasons infielders I have to say its crap, like I ate too much indian food and I’m asking god over and over “why?” In all my years this is basically a few slabs of grade a beef surrounded by tird sandwiches. Am I suppose to be excited about Chase Headley and Jason Kipnis? what gives, I know it seems like all the talent is in the outfield but this is bordering on ridiculous. I guess in some ways it makes sense, when was the last time we had a world series champ that actually had a good team and not a hot team?…probably boston. I think what people are going to take away from this season is platooning, because if you don’t know how yet, you better figure it out, it’s a new reality for fantasy whether we like it or not…go Garrett ” only vs. righties” Jones

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Oops, sorry, didn’t see your comment at first… Yeah, the infield is pretty poor, but in reality most of us won’t deal with 60% of these players… I mean, the 15th ranked SS is around the 190th pick… Most drafts only go to 280 or so players… At least half of these players are for deeper leagues… Garrett Jones might be drafted in 5 of 60 12-team leagues…

      • Jack Full of Hate says:
        (link)

        @Grey: 1st seems like a lot of gambling after the first few, too many old fading guys and a lot of young guys with question marks, 2nd is dead after the top 5, yes there are a few serviceable guys after but, again they are young and we don’t know what to expect, short is what I like to call a clusterfu%$, thank you clint ala heartbreak ridge, and 3rd is decent, but again filled with guys that you aern’t sure who or what they will be, take Panda for example, between injuries and too, too many trips to the buffett you will never know whats in store for you, and seriously the Giants as a whole played out of their skulls last year, so who are they really. I think my strategy might be to have a kick ass outfield and lots of platooning in the infield, unless I get a good draft order spot. And considering that lots of these guys suck then pitchers should be easy when some dork will pass on the good bat for an arm they could have gotten two rounds later.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          1st is crazy deep if some of the old guys perform… More likely, maybe we’ll see one Zombino year where someone like Howard shows glimmers… 2nd is terrible, agreed… SS isn’t bad for some upside in the middle… 3B is a’ight, but I’m sure a few of the top ten guys will fail, they always do… I always like to have a crazy good OF and piecemeal a middle infield…

          • Jack Full of Hate says:
            (link)

            @Grey: 1st definitely has some interesting characters, who knows maybe the yanks actually get value for tex, but it feels like a passing of the torch year for a lot of these guys. i want my anchor damnit!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Yeah, definitely passing of the torch type position… I’m pretty surprised Tex has been so bad the last two years in that park and lineup, but there he is being pretty meh…

              • Jack Full of Hate says:
                (link)

                @Grey: but really gray, how great is that line up now?

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  @Jack Full of Hate: Well, not so much now, but for the last two years he should’ve done something… Probably most surprised at his decline…

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: true, but not that impressive the last few years. this year it looks old and ugly, like axel foleys blue nova.

                    I thought Konerko was retiring?

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Like Axel Foley’s blue NOva in Beverly Hills Cop III. Yeah, Paulie prolly should…

  22. fri-guy says:
    (link)

    I’m not one to hate on Zimmerman. I traded Tommy Hanson for him mid-season last year to a guy that also had Fat Panda and he made third base come alive in ways that Longoria hasn’t since 2010. One cortisone shot after another, he won my heart.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yeah, cortisone shots should have him do commercials for them…

      • Jack Full of Hate says:
        (link)

        @Grey: what no love/disapproval for my above comment

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Oh, and Billy Beane is making platooning the new OBP and he might be on to something again…

  23. Jon says:
    (link)

    Would you rather have Harvey over Medlen, Lester or Anderson? Keeper league so long-term plays in, too.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Over Anderson…

  24. attgig says:
    (link)

    ” Emoticon with a needle sticking into its butt. ”

    _______
    ( Y ) ---|_______|---|

    big syringe for the smallish butt….

    • attgig says:
      (link)

      @attgig:

      damnit, the spaces didn’t keep.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha… Nice…

  25. james d says:
    (link)

    12 team h2h

    which side you prefer?

    kemp r2 keepable 1year and strasburg r9 1year
    for
    trout r11 2 years and medlen r9 2years

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Trout

  26. Snake Hips says:
    (link)

    I sure hope Lawrie pulls it together this year… I think I’m keeping him this year with a 23rd round penalty. But I dunno, I’ll ask you how you feel about it closer to my draft haha.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Gotcha… Yeah, at 23rd round it’s not bad at all… Obviously depends on if you have to lose someone else for him…

  27. Jack Full of Hate says:
    (link)

    I had a little brain storm with sky and we came up with a team image generator idea. you take your biggest fantasy crush, like Stanton for you last year, and through the generator it makes your image look like a classic tiger beat magazine cover….I have always felt razzball was the tiger beat of fantasy baseball with all these man crushes going on.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I love it… Find someone to implement it…

      • Jack Full of Hate says:
        (link)

        @Grey: thats the hard part, I’m a moron when it comes to tech and every one I know is not good with tech. the hard part of good ideas in a computer world.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          It’s why things are as they are… It takes a certain type of brain to computer program and a different type of brain to come up with team image generators… Those brains don’t always overlap… I definitely have a latter type brain… Imagine if we program that team image generator and you keep clicking it and the image that kept showing was a donkey’s body with Charlie Manuel’s head… What would that say?

          • Jack Full of Hate says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Centaur Manuel….huh, that sounds like espanol. I think i found one of my team names, i like it. for the love of nonsense we present to you: CENTAUR MANUEL

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Ha! Sir, that donkey is hung like a Manuel.

              • Jack Full of Hate says:
                (link)

                @Grey: I think talking about manuel junk went a little too far for me…on a brighter note i am now following razzball on twitter, I figure why not, being a technophobe makes me seem older than I am.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Ha! Yeah, you’re not gonna get much from our Twitter other than our links, but welcome to the world of Twitter… I don’t like it…

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: its a good way to promote the website and thats whats most important

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      Yeah, that’s about it…

                  • Steve says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: You should choose your follows carefully and use it as a news source.

                    Oh, and to follow porn stars.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
                      (link)

                      But of course!

  28. OneHung Lo says:
    (link)

    12 Team (5 x 5) Keep 5 year to year. Would like some input, team is:
    Keeping: Braun, Cano
    Debating On: Jay Bruce, Tulo, Grienke, Cain, Butler
    Rest of Roster:
    CJ Wilson
    Aramis Ramirez
    Beckett
    Montero
    Alex Rios
    Matt Garza
    Venters
    Kendrys Morales
    Clippard
    Fowler
    Minor
    Sergio Santos
    Lucroy

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Bruce, Tulo, Greinke…

  29. Jim says:
    (link)

    Any thoughts on Chris Nelson? I have him ranked 21st w possible upside…?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      He’s a utility man who will probably lose the starting job by the All-Star break…

  30. Dakota says:
    (link)

    Hey Grey,

    I have both Frazier and Machado on my squad. It’s a 12 team keeper league (roto scoring). Which one would you keep?

    • Dakota says:
      (link)

      @Dakota:

      Forgot to mention: I can draft either player in the final round (25th).

  31. Eric says:
    (link)

    In a dynasty league, how does your rankings differ when it comes to drafting Lawrie/Middlebrooks/Machado?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      To Machado, Lawrie…

      • Eric says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Ty sir

Comments are closed.