LOGIN

What’s quirkier than a relief pitcher? I’ll tell you what: a stubborn 3-legged beagle. Success as a set-up reliever is so overlooked in real life baseball as well as fake life baseball. These guys are weird; they have crazy superstitions, wear bass-ackwards numbers, and have their own theme music. I want a song for every time I’m introduced that makes no sense. I get that numbers dictate who throws where (success rate vs. batter, lefty/righty and workload), but these are the guys that the managers trust to “save” the game for their team in the 6-8th innings. There is no set rule for drafting MRs (umm… last?). The best advice I can give is to pay attention to trends with managers (La Russa, Torre, Black and Gardenhire are very models of modern major middle reliever Generals). Now, will failing to win Holds ruin your fantasy season if your league uses it? Probably not, but don’t go all Ray Guy — these guys still contribute vital fantasy numbers, decent ratios and K’s. I love Ks, kids scream for them, Al Gore says he invented them. Here is a list of middle men for your fantasy baseball team who will be a decent source for holds and other peripherals. Included, you’ll find a theme song for each guy (what they actually warm up to or what I think they should).

(This week, American league. Next Thursday, NL.)

Matt Guerrier – Last year’s leader in Holds and co-winner of the Arthur Rhodes trophy. Appearances were way up last year; bullpen is way deeper this year. Two to three guys from Minnesota could be top 10 in Holds this year. See next middle man. “Leader of the Pack” Shangri-Las

Jon Rauch – Minnesota –> best bullpen in the league for my money. Rauch is also very tall and a good sleeper for rebounds. “Tall Drink of Water” Barbara Mandrell

Pat Neshek – See previous 2 entries. Love this guy, funky delivery — great against lefties. Year back from TJ surgery. Previous Gardenhire favorite. “Living on a Prayer” Bon Jovi

Jose Mijares – The lefty that gets lost in the group of RH monsters. Completes this dominant setup in front Nathan. “Macarena” Los Del Rio

Jim Johnson – Getting some love as a sleeper for saves; young rotation could let him see a lot of leads. Needs to work on location to be effective. “Closer” Nine Inch Nails

Michael Wuertz – Helped a ton of fantasy teams last year that didn’t count Holds. Awesome ratios and source of K’s. “Safety Dance” Men without Hats

Brad Zeigler – Had a closer’s gig, got injured, Bailey steps in and called him Wally Pipp. Funky delivery — absolutely filthy when healthy. “Walk this Way” Run DMC

Daniel Bard – Flame thrower. Great for K’s. Will be Francona’s RH “big dig” to Papelbon. Great dynasty guy for future. “Next in Line” Children of Bodom

Hideki Okajima – Guy doesn’t even need to look where he is throwing — he is that good. The Zakim bridge for Boston bullpen. Anything would be better than his current theme song.  Look it up.

Brandon League – Finally out of the AL Beast. Seattle is going to win 90 plus. Has nasty pitches, and how can you not like a guy who has both arms “sleeved” up?  “Bulls on Parade” Rage Against the Machine

Mark Lowe – Seattle pen is shaping up as long as Aardsma can repeat. Great ratios, high K promise. He teams with League (above) to form — you guessed it “Sweet n Lowe.” “Ah Sugar” The Archies

Matt Thornton – Filthy lefty with great control. Will be an Ozzie fav out of the pen or on his new Twitter account. “Panama” Van Halen

J.J. Putz – Former closer. May get a chance if Jenks falls off the wagon, again. Elbow issues hopefully behind him. “Thunderstruck” AC/DC

Bobby Seay – Lefty specialist. Tons of one and done appearances. Detroit has sleeper potential type bullpen with Seay, the Guitar Hero, and the son of Journey front man, Steve Perry. “Hypnotize” Notorious B.I.G

Jason Bulger – Equally effective against R/L. Anaheim closer situation may be in flux by May. Could give a Guerrier from ‘09 performance. “Californua Love” Tupac

JP Howell – Thurston’s love child. Very steady last year. Now has a semi-proven closer. Could sure up TB pen. Theme from “Gilligan’s Island”

Dan Wheeler – RH compliment to Howell; will set up Soriano nicely. A veteran presence that is used to pitching with game on the line. “Stiff Upper Lip” AC/DC

Damaso Marte – Lefty in front of the GOAT. Will be Girardi’s “Coke” substitute (and I’m not talking about the white pony). “Mambo Number 5” Lou Bega

David Robertson – Last year’s leader in K/9. Unheralded and shined in playoffs. Will lose some gleam from the Hughes/Joba loser. “Sweet Home Alabama” Skynyrd

Juan Cruz – Great hype entering last year in this role. Injury slowed him; great K potential. Forms a formidable RP core in KC with Rosa in front of Soria. “Eres Tu” Calderon

Others to consider: Scott Downs, Jason Frasor, Kevin Gregg TOR. Darren O’Day, Chris Ray TEX. Chan Ho Park NYY. Jensen Lewis, Rafael Perez, Jess Todd CLE. Fernando Rodney, Kevin Jepsen ANA