Kendrys Morales was so busy running to the DMV to change his name that he will not be ready for the start of the season. This will give Mark Trumbo an opportunity to get some April at-bats. You say ho-hum, I say ho-hmm. Did you see what I did there? DID YOU!? Yeah, I’m not sure either. Trumbo hit 36 home runs in 139 Triple-A games last year. Sure, that was in the PCL which is like hitting on the moon with an aluminum bat. Still, 36 homers is nothing to sneeze at unless you’re allergic to power, upside rookies. In most mixed leagues, Trumbo’s not worth stashing. But in deeper leagues, I’d absolutely take a flyer that Kendrys has a few more setbacks. I mean, it’s already taken him way too long to recover. Who knows? Maybe Trumbo will Pipp Kendry and mash his way into a regular job. BTW, with the switch from Kendry to Kendrys, it seems like the “s” that Alexis Rios dropped when he switched to Alex has finally appeared. Be interesting to see where the “i” shows up at. I’m guessing there’s going to be a new San Fran outfielder, Cody Rossi. Anyway, here’s what else is going on in fantasy baseball:
Scott Downs – Broke his toe. Downs goes… Um, Downs.
Scott Hairston – Sticking with the newly established Scott theme, Beltran is going to start the year on the disabled list. It’s not official. I’m Cust kayin’ here. Right now, I’d put Beltran’s over/under for games played at 100. So who do the Mets go to, Scott Hairston, Lucas Duda or Willie Harris? Is this even a question? In NL-Only leagues, I’d take a flyer on Hairston for a cheap 10/10 season.
Nyjer Morgan – Riggleman is proving himself to be an enemy of fantasy baseballers (<–my mom’s term!). In center field, he’s leaning towards starting Rick Ankiel with Roger Bernadina backing him up and Nyjer headed to the minors. That arrangement is the new blech. At least Nyjer has steals and Bernandina has 15/20 upside. Ankiel is a high-teen power, terrible average guy. He’s useless in just about all leagues. Nyjer has no one to throw a ball at here but himself since he’s currently not hitting well in spring training.
Brian Roberts – Says his back feels great. I say wait two weeks until his back no longer feels great.
Billy Butler – Did I say pitchers…I meant platters.
Kevin Millwood – You know the gag in Hall Pass where an unattractive girl surrounds herself with lesser attractive girls to make herself look better? Okay, now picture that when you hear the news that the Yankees went to watch Kevin Millwood pitch then went back and watched Bartolo Colon.
Will Rhymes – Will start the season at 2nd base for the always-injured Carlos Guillen. Rhymes had 22 steals in the minors last year in 95 games and zero in 54 major league games. It’s rhyming and stealing! Not rhyming and sitting on first! In AL-Only leagues, I’d take a flyer on Rhymes for some SAGNOF.
Andrew Bailey – Dr. Freeze put Bailey on ice until his forearm feels better. I.e., no one has any idea when Bailey will be healthy. I’m guessing he’ll save some games from mid-April to mid-May then hit the DL.
Jake Peavy – Sent a text message to the Chicago Tribune that he’ll be able to resume pitching again on Thursday. He then challenged the beat writer to a game of Words With Friends.
Danny Espinosa – Should be fine after sustaining a bruised foot, which isn’t half as delicious as a braised foot.
Jason Heyward – Turns out his back is sore because he has less cartilage between discs than the average person. See, nothing about Heyward is average! Yeah, that sounds bad but don’t think it’s going to be a real problem for a few years. Not sure why they couldn’t harvest some cartilage from someone else. Jeff Francoeur, “It’s so great to see some of my old friends in Spring Training…. Yeah, of course I’m open for a deep tissue massage.” Then the Braves trainer cackles maniacally.