Comments on: The Fine Art of Choosing A Team Name

By: The Dude

The Dude — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 21:57:58 +0000

Since I had won my dynasty league 4 out of the past 7 seasons, last year I named my team: Wire Use Sofa Kingdom

It may take a while to get it…just think of it as a question. FYI, I made it 5 for 8 and hoped someone with half a brain would get my team name in the RCL league. Either it’s not as good as I think it is, or it’s true…lol

By: Clint

Clint — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 09:53:02 +0000

I’m a fan of puns on statistical categories myself. “Ghost Ride the WHIP” was my old favorite to use in H2H leagues where I punted pitching ratios in favor of stacking W’s and K’s.

“Covert OPS” and “Occam’s RZR” are getting some use this season.

By: Ron

Ron — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 23:17:55 +0000

Do you recall Phillip Wellman, the Atlanta Braves’ minor league coach that displayed the SINGLE GREATEST BLOW UP ever? If you recall, prior to wrapping up his perfectly scripted display to show up the umpiring crew, he did a military crawl to the mound, grabbed the rosin bag pulled the imaginary grenade pin out with his teeth and chucked it beautifully to within a couple feet of the homeplate umpire. My team name will forever be…..the “Rosin Bag Grenadiers”.

By: Grey

Grey — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 16:29:25 +0000

@jamesllegade: Shame about the outcome, I like The Turd Flingers.

By: jamesllegade

jamesllegade — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 11:36:50 +0000

And the final

Gas House Gorillas

http://ussmariner.com/2006/03/12/bugs-bunny-greatest-banned-player-ever/

By: jamesllegade

jamesllegade — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 01:57:53 +0000

I myself go with themes. I have been mining the Monkey Theme for quite a while;

The Primate 9 (a homage to a local band called “the Primate 5″ which, oddly enough, was a three piece)
The Chimpions (after i won the league)
SILVERBACK (after i won a 2nd straight)
The Ape-Ocalypse (a third)
Turd Flinger (Finally lost)

By: Grey

Grey — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 20:43:57 +0000

@hasenmensch: Represent, Philly Phans! @BigFatHippo: Hehe @p0rk burn: Well, look who it is. Back to reclaim your RCL title, I suppose. @Byrone: I don't know what "The Ha Noi Nguyeners" means but it's funny and I think racist. @Scandalous Bob: That's an awesome backstory! @wizo: I've heard a lot of (lame) variations on the Pujols theme, but Porno for Pujols isn't bad.

By: Baron Von Vulturewins

Baron Von Vulturewins — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 20:41:54 +0000

@Cotton: First off, if your real God-given first name is Cotton, I am very jealous. (More jealous than I am of Grey and Rudy Gamble.)

Second, The Baron Ucklers is pretty great. I just might have to steal that. You, sir, clearly have a facility with puns, a skill I greatly admire.

Given that, it seems a shame to call your teams the Cotton Club, as appropriate as that might be. May I suggest:

Cotton the Crossfires (or the Cotton Crossfires)
Cotton the Act

or my favorite

The Cotton Himmels

By: Grey

Grey — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 20:39:11 +0000

@Cotton: Good to have you commenting! (And the rest of youse.) I don't play on my name for a team, probably so I can distance myself if need be. For instance, The Greyboy All-Stars might have owned Ben Grieve in 2001 hoping for a huge bounceback, but I would never!

By: Cotton

Cotton — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 20:08:06 +0000

This article finally transformed me from lurker to poster. Due to my first name, I use The Cotton Club often. But during a draft I’m The Loco Motives to throw my opponents off the scent.

In Fantasy FB (no basketball for me, but football and baseball rule!), I tried to convince my friend Warren to call his team The Warren Terror, but, sadly, he used some indiscernible acronym (and finished in last place).

Grey: Ever heard of The Greyboy All-Stars? If you lived in Seattle, like me, The Greysies would resonate.
Baron: as a shamed king once said “I’m a lover not a fighter.” Still, The Baron Ucklers has a ring to it.

By: Scandalous Bob

Scandalous Bob — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 03:56:29 +0000

A few years ago I spent some time in Eastern Europe and picked up some Russian. The Russian word for grandma or old lady is “babushka”. We called them “bobs” for short. One day I saw an old lady wearing a short skirt and said to a friend, “That’s a scandalous bob!” My first thought was that it would make a great band name, (which I actually used in a band a few summers ago). Later, “Scandalous Bobs” became my standard fantasy baseball team name. I haven’t finished lower than 3rd in any league where I’ve used that name. Most guys in my leagues just assume my name is Bob. But only I know the truth. And it still makes me laugh.

By: wizo

wizo — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 03:30:30 +0000

last year one of my leagues used over 200 player/band combos

few examples:
Rage Against the Fermin
Nen Inch Nails
Ríos Speedwagon
Hunter Pence None the Richer
Atkins in Chains
Aviles Lavigne
Sciocsia Distortion
Porno for Pujols
Gload the Wet Sprocket
Villone Thugs N’ Harmony
Veruca Saltalamaccia
Goo Goo Qualls
right said freddy sanchez
Uggla Kid Joe
Helton John

By: ChrisKamanFanClubPresident

ChrisKamanFanClubPresident — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 02:46:16 +0000

What do you do when someone steals your fantasy team name for another league he is in. Should you share in the winnings, take a nominal fee, or shun him completely for trying to pawn it off as his own stroke of genius?

Also enjoyed a fantasy basketball name from 1999…The Lew Alcindor LP

By: hasenmensch

hasenmensch — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 02:25:28 +0000

Not sure where I saw this name first (it wasn’t for one of my teams but I ran across it on some website): What Would DeJesus Do. Good for a current team with David or an old-school one with Ivan. (If I were Grey, here I would say something like “Represent, Philly Phans!” But I am not Grey nor can I do justice to his trademarked brand of self-consciously detached irony.)

By: Martin

Martin — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 22:51:24 +0000

Im sorry but my favorite of all time is the team name Chris Kaman His Pants from a fantasy basketball league (no where as fun as baseball). It took my 2 months to finally realize the name.

By: p0rk burn

p0rk burn — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 20:02:26 +0000

Nice work BVV. You made me laugh a couple of times, good thing the boss just took off.

By: BigFatHippo

BigFatHippo — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 20:02:22 +0000

@sneauxman: I know her!

By: sneauxman

sneauxman — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:59:30 +0000

The best I saw last year was Foul Pole Dancers.

By: PWNightmare

PWNightmare — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:40:13 +0000

“now” know it

By: PWNightmare

PWNightmare — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:39:41 +0000

Hey, the whole reason I got into the rotisserie thing was because it combined my love of baseball & Dungeons & Dragons! Ahh, the late 80′s/Early 90′s… a time before fantasy baseball as we know know it.

By: Byrone

Byrone — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 18:46:34 +0000

Forgot to add my old stand-by: “The Ha Noi Nguyeners”

By: Byrone

Byrone — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 18:41:28 +0000

Having both upton brothers locked down in a keeper league: “Upton Oh Good”

By: Baron Von Vulturewins

Baron Von Vulturewins — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 18:22:11 +0000

@Tim: Rod Smart is among my favorite fifty sports people of all time. The phrase "He Hate Me" is the best thing to come out of that league. I still say the XFL would have succeeded if it had just been a bit more crazy. No fair catch? Pshaw! How about one guy on offense is soaked in kerosene, and every defensive player carries a Zippo? Or dudes on horses. Or motorbikes. More Thunderdome, is what I'm saying. @101 M.P.H.: They're hard to stash away given they're in a climate-controlled bulletproof trophy case with dedicated halogen lighting. @johnson: re: Bobbitt and the Cutt-Off Men -- (sound of slow clapping, building to standing ovation).

By: josh q public

josh q public — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 18:21:07 +0000

i always like the splendid sphincter

By: johnson

johnson — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:57:11 +0000

fantasy names should be something funny, clever, or force someone into a mental image they can’t shake for a week. here’s a few of mine from the past-
Gary Carter’s Perm- in reverence to the best coif of the 80′s
Ass Gerbils- in honor of Richard Gere
Cocaine n Guns- just a couple of hobbies of mine
Jose Cruzers- a true badass
Joan Rivers’ Vagina- cavernous
The Gay Centaurs- ?
Felix Hair Pies- too easy
and my RCL name- Bobbitt and the Cutt-Off Men- also the name of my softball team

By: Hank

Hank — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:55:42 +0000

@Grey: Oh, you are dastardly.

By: sjglauber

sjglauber — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:49:44 +0000

Big fan of the puns:

Ugeth’s As Good As Mine
Cock Ortiz
Learn Teixiera
Jacoby Photoshop
Peach Snaplebon

can’t remember any more

By: Grey

Grey — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:45:49 +0000

@Hank: Thanks! (That was my plan all along. Muahahahaha...)

By: Hank

Hank — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:41:48 +0000

@Grey: You now have 5 thumbs up.

By: 101 M.P.H.

101 M.P.H. — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 17:38:49 +0000

@Baron Von Vulturewins: For the love of God, please tell me you were able to stash the Yahoo bobbleheads away before your significant other could discover them....