Chris Davis is so easy to strike out that pitchers should let him get a 4th or 5th strike like you’d give the small-for-his-age kid in little league. “Good cut, Chris!” Then the parent who needs anger management screams, “It’s on a freakin’ tee! Hit the damn ball!” Davis is also so easy to strike out the Rangers felt like they needed to go out and get someone who is marginally better. Enter Jorge Cantu. Or as I like to call him, the guy I told you to sell back at the end of April when his value was at its highest. Cantu gets a boost in value because he’s now going to be hitting in a lineup with Giant Machine and Hulk Machine, while calling Coors South home. I’d grab Cantu off waivers if I was hurting at my corner infidel spot. Meanwhile, Chris Davis heads to the minors to try and reclaim that glory that had Bill James projecting him for, like, 40 homers and 10 steals. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Ian Kinsler – Back to the DL with a strained groin and could be out until the end of August. Who had July 29th in the ‘Kinsler goes back on DL’ pool? Kinsler’s officially dropping way down in 2011 drafts. He might be the fourth Ranger drafted next year. I smell a sleeper post about him from January Grey. January Grey, “Leave me alone, I’m watching Jersey Shore.”
Brett Wallace – It’s ironic he’s only a 1st base prospect because he’s getting passed around the majors like a trollop who’s been a lot farther than 1st base. For those keeping score, he’s gone from STL to OAK in the Matt Holliday deal, OAK to TOR for OF prospect Michael Taylor (whom Toronto got in the Halladay deal), and now from TOR to HOU for OF prospect Anthony Gose. The book on Walllace is he’s a great hitter with a bad glove (hence the move from 3B to 1B). Now it’s one thing when STL trades a 1B (when they have Pujols) or when Oakland trades a 1B (Billy Beane likes to keep busy) but when the Lyle Overbay-playing Blue Jays trade a 1B prospect one has to wonder. Is something wrong here 0r is the Jays GM, Alex the Greek just opa’ing prospects into the fireplace? Either way, Lance Berkman looks like he’s about to embark on the Casino Bus. If Wallace gets called up, he’s immediately mixed league material. He hit 18 homers in 385 minor league ABs this year. Though it was in the PCL. BTW, this is the longest blurb ever for a roundup. I don’t even remember who I was talking about. Oh, Brett Wallace! Yeah, he can hit, grab him now in NL-Only leagues, deep mixed leagues and keepers, just in case he’s called up.
Matt Capps – Traded to the Twins for Wilson Ramos, a top catching prospect, and Joe Testa, who throws straight gas, but is still very young. Look at the Nats making moves! Too bad Bowden wasn’t still around, he would’ve never stood for that. As much as I’d prefer to talk about how the Nats can be a serious contender in two years, this is after all a fantasy blog. If you’re really desperate for saves, I’d hold Rauch just in case he sees some chances or if you need rebounds (he’s tall!), but the Minnesota papers are reporting Capps will close. I tend to believe the Minnesotans, salt of the earth people yadda2. Also, if Capps doesn’t close, then it looks even worse that the Twins traded those prospects away. Gotta keep up appearances, ya know?
Miguel Tejada – Traded to the Padres to play….where? He could play shortstop with the range of Cal Ripken but that dude’s 50 years old. He could play 3B and move Headley back to the OF, but is Tejada really a better bat than the Padres worst corner OF? Maybe, and that’s just sad.
Josh Bell – Will replace Tejada at 3rd base for the Suckie O’s. Bell’s AL-Only ownable, which is saying very little since Daric Barton is AL-Only material. Bell needs to get hot before picking up in mixed leagues, or, if you speak street, he needs to be fire on Crunk Juice.
Michael Wuertz – Now Bailey’s headed to the DL. Wuertz has shown himself to be pretty adept at blowing save opportunities, so he’s no sure thing, but Breslow is? As German prostitutes like to say, I grabbed Wuertz. (BTW, whenever I think of a German prostitute, I picture a woman that could have easily been a female wrestler if she just got a few breaks.)
Neil Walker – 1-for-4 with his 5th homer and 2nd in three games. I’ve knocked him a bunch, but when you’re looking at a Pu-Pu Platter of middle infielders, Walker’s at least hitting.
Matt Diaz – First time I was able to get Diaz into my lineup because it was a short schedule day and he homered. That’s how you roll the Dye-as!
Miguel Montero – 4 for his last 8 with a homer yesterday. Instead of just letting their catcher scabs be, I’ve noticed people are dropping Montero. He could have a solid final two months.
Ian Desmond – 2-for-3 with his 7th homer. Please make note of this next year when you’re drafting. A 10/10 guy looks good when you’re drafting him, but when you’re actually waiting for him to get to 10/10 it’s mind numbingly boring.
Scott Olsen – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 1 K. He’ll be in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell. And that’s a promise or my name isn’t Grey “El Toro” Albright.
Drew Storen – Clippard’s been a hot mess for a while now, so I’d grab Storen for saves. If you’re really hurting for saves, I’d grab Clippard too. If you’re really, really hurting for saves, I’d grab Sean Burnett. (And I did grab Clippard and Burnett in some leagues — My name is Grey “El Toro” Albright and I am a save vulture. Please forgive me if I have told you to pick up a guy that has shat on your ratios. I am powerless to my vulturing. Anyone got some coffee and cigarettes?)
Ramon Castro – Hit 2 homers yesterday. Appropriate of nothing, doesn’t his goatee look like a sideways yin and yang symbol? Maybe it’s me.
Carlos Quentin – 2-for-4 with his 20th home run. Sweet, now stay healthy for two months and hit.
Raul Ibanez – Hit his 2nd homer in the last week and he just missed his third with a WTF (Warning Track Fly). Also, hitting near .450 in the last week.
David Price – 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 9 Ks as he recorded his 14th win. That sound you hear is the BBWAA preparing their AL Cy Young vote for Price. Voter, “A team win is the most important thing. And if a guy pitches with moxie. That’s important too.”
Anibal Sanchez – 9 IP, 0 ER, 2 baserunners (1 Hit), 8 Ks. And he’s got a no-hitter on his resume too from 2006. Pretty impressive given his career WHIP is 1.45. Kind of feast or famine – fitting for a guy whose name anagrams to He’s Za Cannibal.