Much like a newly married female, the Blue Jays have dropped BJ from the active roster. Imagine this scenario. You walk into your fro-yo distribution job, say what’s up to your TCBY manager who’s twelve years younger than you, open up the jimmies container and proceed to flip them, one at a time, at your manager’s head.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Kelvim Escobar was sent to the bullpen. His value goes from potentially good to potentially nothing. Scioscia said Escobar will be pitching out of the bullpen for the rest of the season. Scioscia also said Brandon Wood would start at shortstop two years ago and said Arredondo, the guy now in the minors, would be the closer and he said Rex Hudler’s got the best herb, when he wants to get wiggy with Figgy.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Indians have been more of a trainwreck than Jeff Conaway and Tom Sizemore doing a community theater production of The Taking of Pelham 123. Now Grady Sizemore hits the DL with elbow inflammation. For whatever reason, this season he’s shown himself to be a bit of a flight risk.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Matt Wieters was finally called up by the Orioles. We know what you’re all thinking – how could they give up on Gregg Zaun so quickly? Don’t the Orioles brass have the intestinal fortitude to withstand the hype surrounding this ‘phenom’ when they’ve got the ultimate journeyman?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Let’s just assume Joe Mauer hits 25 HRs, though no one south of the Arctic Circle has him projected for more than 18. And even some less optimistic Eskimos have him down for only 20. Let’s also assume after curing the swine (<–which is prosciutto, I believe), he hits .330.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Travis Hafner pronk’d you like only he can. Here’s you in the 17th round of your draft, “Well, Swisher’s staring at me like he wants my Jolly Ranchers, but his playing time is an issue. Oh, wait, I know! I’ll grab Hafner because he’s going to bounce back to in medias res HGH levels of production.” First off, it’s impressive you used in medias res in a sentence to yourself even if it was used wrong.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Chien-Ming Wang – the two-time 19 game winner – is pitching historically bad. How bad? Some TV highlight show quoted some statistical service that the 15 earned runs he’s given up in the past 2 starts are the most ever for a Yankee pitcher’s first two starts of the year.Please, blog, may I have some more?
With apologies to the great baseball writers that are from KC and/or write about the Royals (Bill James, Rob Neyer, Joe Posanaski), we decided to honor the Royals’ acting like a real sports team for the past 15 years by converting their roster into the best combination of sports and acting there is: professional wrestling.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Someone who’s friends with Dr. James Andrews just sent him this email, “Yo, Grisly Andrews, quick question. Am I holding onto Hudson or should I pick up Campillo? Also, love to have you over again for dinner, but Mary says you can’t reconfigure a chicken from the bones and scraps.Please, blog, may I have some more?