I didn’t understand the title at first when Rudy gave it to me.  Our conversation went like this, “I don’t get it.”  Him, “What do truckers need?”  Me, “Caffeine and horns?”  Him, “Hats with back-of-the-head ventilation.”  After a beat, him again, “Speed!  They need speed!”  Personally, I think all of these trucker requirements are right.  The conversation continued with me asking, “And EYJ is a play on KY Jelly?”  Him, “It’s a Se7en reference.  Please leave me alone.”  The 30 for 30 we’re all waiting for:  Michael Madsen narrates, “Back in the 1980’s, Keith Hernandez, Willie Stargell and Dave Parker used to sniff more devil’s dandruff than Tony Montana at the height of his infamy, and these weren’t even the fast guys.  At some point in the 1990’s, cocaine looked less cool when players started crashing and burning.”  Cut to:  a reenactment of Dwight Gooden trying to sell something to a drug dealer.  Actor playing Doc Gooden, “This is the original Doc Gooden rookie card!  It’s my high school driver’s license!”  Now, speed’s crashed like Alex P. Keaton after a brutal exam.  Enter, Mallex Smith, Cameron Maybin and Eric Young Jr.  Maybin is the most polished; let’s call him Maybinski.  He can provide top 30 OF-type numbers, but will likely get injured.  EYJ is the schmotato-y one, and will likely lose his job within a month.  Finally, Mallex is the most upsidey and interesting one to me.  He could have a Billy Hamilton-type six weeks and never look back, except when looking back at greenies, Ron LeFlore and the go-go 80’s that never sucked, but they sure did blow.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

On this lovely Thursday afternoon, I’m going to approach this post as sort of a potpourri of minor league topics. It’s callup season, which is the most joyous, stressful, and busy times of the year for us Prospectors. Everyone wants to know who’s the next big callup, and when to stash them. It’s a tricky game to master, because there might not be a task more impossible to perfect, than getting in these teams heads. So we’ll go over my top 10 callups for June and beyond, and cross my fingers that I’m more than 50% correct. We’ll also talk some prospects making noise this week, and maybe drop a couple jewels on the draft and impending July 2nd signings. There’s so much to talk about! There’s so much to take my mind off of my many mediocre teams, and general inadequacies in RCL gameplay when matched against luminaries like Grey, Cram It, Nick The Dick, and Matt Truss. Hey, at least J-FOH isn’t beating my ass this year! These are the times I’m glad dynasty exists, I can crawl back into my hole, and dig in on some prospecting. Just me, my gold pan, and a world of infinite possibilities. It’s a mixed bag of minor league magic. It’s the latest edition of the minor league update.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We should’ve taken it as a sign of superhuman abilities, when Bo Bichette’s body digested his burst appendix last season. That’s so insane Chuck Norris is impressed. Matt Wieters facts never made a claim that lofty. That’s some X-Men mutant baseball machine stuff. The craziest part is he unknowingly played through it for a week, and raked!!! I know, I know a story this good, it’s really a lot to digest… Thank you, I’ll be here all week, literally. As exciting as it might seem to get a lesson in freaky anatomy happenings from me, that’s not why I bring up Bichette. Though it might be in line with his recent production. Freakish!! As I write this he just finished off a 4 for 5 night, with a double, a triple, and 2 runs scored. The game actually started as a 4 for 4 night, and was a diving grab away from being a 5 for 5 night. This isn’t an isolated incident either, but you knew that if you were paying attention.

After slashing .427/.451/.732 in 91 plate appearances during his stint in the Gulf Coast League in 2016. Bichette has continued that dominance in his first run at full season ball. He currently leads the Midwest League in batting average, OBP, Slugging, and has an OCD like 7 homers and 7 steals. He’s riding a 13 game hitting streak, and needs to be owned in all dynasty formats of all types. He’s outperforming teammate Vladimir Guerrero Jr., who by the way, is performing pretty well. Bichette is of course a year older, so any comps should be taken with a grain of salt. All this to say, Bichette, who didn’t make my Top 100 in February might be in my Top 50 now. Things change fast in the minors…… Here’s what else I saw in the MiLB.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ralph and Halp are coming at you hot off the press this morning, or more accurately, hot off the VoIP (Voice over Internet Protocol). This is our farm-to-table, grass fed, free range edition of the Prospect Podcast. We started the recording at 8:45 AM and it’s hopefully going to drop at 11 AM (if I can finish this write-up in time). The podcast gets off to a rolling start when we debate just how early is too early to teach your child that beautiful Cody Bellinger uppercut, rather than hammering home that boring “keep your elbow up” batting stance that I’m sure every single kid to ever play Little League is completely sick and tired of hearing about. We then transition into tons of prospect talk, starting with Gleyber Torres, Rafael Devers, Dinelson Lamet, and Tom Murphy, before moving on to some players who are absolutely killing the game right now, including Ronald Acuna, Kyle Tucker, Corey Ray, Jack Flaherty, Dustin Fowler, Brendan Rodgers, Scott Kingery, and many more. It’s the latest edition of the Razzball Fantasy Baseball Prospect Podcast.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

This isn’t about what Amed Rosario can do when he’s promoted.  I mean, that will be in here, but we’re getting to the point in the season where Super Twos are super-done with the minors.  So, what the flying Mr. Met middle finger is a Super Two?  I love baseball, but we need to move past the language that sounds like it needs to be explained by an attorney.  I don’t know football, but do they have situations where players can’t play until a certain date due to salary arbitration and is that date different for every player?  Of course not, football fans can barely figure out offsides — Grey’s dragging people!  Novel concept:  baseball says all rookies can come up on June 1st and that’s it!  Nothing else!  Lose Super Two!  Super Two sounds like a toddler that is big for his or her size or a large turd, which may be one in the same depending on your POV.  As for Amed Rosario, Prospector Ralph just gave you his Amed Rosario fantasy.  To pull some quotes from there, “Crabs, haters, and countrymen…on a limb here…is the peculiar case of Amed Rosario.”  What is he smoking?  Hmm, maybe it was my pulling of quotes.  In summation, he’s hitting .350 with five homers and 11 steals through 51 games in Triple-A, and he’s more than ready to play every day for the Mets, so promote him and stop being a super pooper too!  Ouch.  I need a nap after that one.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It only took a little over 24 hours for the Luis Robert sweepstakes to come to a close. As news broke yesterday afternoon that the Chicago White Sox had struck a deal in the $25 million to $30 million dollar range with the 19 year old Cuban phenom. This is a significant development on a few fronts; for real life baseball, this will be the last deal signed under the old rules, where teams weren’t capped on international free agents under the age of 23. It’s also significant because, the White Sox, might just have in their possession, 2 to 3 of the top ceiling prospects in the minors at the moment. Those of course being Yoan Moncada, Michael Kopech, and now Luis Robert. The other element to this story is Moncada and Robert will forever be linked to each other, not just by nationally, or organization, but also by dollars and the expectations attached to those presidential flashcards. As for Luis Robert the player, much like Moncada, he’s as high end in terms of talent as they come. Many have graded Robert’s hit tool a touch below Moncada’s at a 55, with some concern about his swing and miss. Where Robert edges out Moncada is in his 70 grade speed mark, and 60 grade fielding. Some scouts see Robert’s power ceiling being higher, but even those scouts mark it as a splitting hairs difference. So we’re talking about a true 5 tool talent, with some additional polish to his fielding. Though it tends to be overlooked in fantasy it’s actually a major positive for his owners, as it might accelerate his ETA two years from now. There’s little doubt in my mind he’s the clearcut top overall choice in 2017-18 First Year Player Drafts, and it’s really not close at the moment. Here’s who else is making noise in the MiLB…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s that time of year again when Ralph and Halp enter the Grey area and talk about Major Leaguers on the Prospect Podcast. It somehow felt more subversive when Ralph wasn’t writing the Top 100 Pitcher Ranks and I wasn’t co-hosting the Baseball Podcast, but them’s the breaks of going mainstream I guess. We start by discussing the value of slow starters such as Alex Bregman and Byron Buxton, before moving on to the power hitting breakouts of Aaron Judge, Cody Bellinger, Eric Thames, and Yonder Alonso. On the pitching side, we debate just how good Michael Fulmer is, and if Marcus Stroman can be anything more than a solid fantasy starter. It’s the latest edition of the Razzball Prospect Podcast.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Francisco Rodriguez was removed from the closer job, because he was being sued by a dumpster fire for trademark infringement.  A portion of the deposition transcript follows:

“Is it true that you were passing an alleyway behind a Subway sandwich shop in late-March when you remarked to your friend, Nicholas Castellanos, that you thought it would be cool to also be a dumpster fire?”

“Leading the witness.”

“I’ll rephrase.  What did you say to Nicholas Castellanos when you saw a dumpster fire?”

“I could be that.”

That dumpster fire?”

“Yes!  It was aglow like E.T.’s finger!  I am the Icarus of refuse!”  So, Francisco Rodriguez is out, and Justin Wilson is in as the Tigers’ closer.  I’d guess the Tigers will try to go back to K-Rod at some point, but I’d also think it won’t turn out any better, and Wilson will end up being a solid closer, maybe even a Donkeycorn.  I’d grab Wilson in all leagues.  Then, there’s the case of Mark Melancon, who was DL’d due to an injury near his forearm.  “But I just learned it’s not a Hard C!”  That’s a Giants fan.  This might be me overreacting, but an injury near a forearm for a closer sounds like trouble.  There’s been some disagreement about who will take over, and I grabbed Hunter Strickland and Derek Law where I could, but I’m also like Pookie for SAGNOF, fiending for saves.  *smacks veins*  Give me more setup men!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

They said our chemistry would never be the same. They said Halp couldn’t do two podcasts a week. They said Ralph couldn’t handle a third article, along with this podcast, a Youtube show, a full time job, a wife, three kids, etc … Who said this? Probably no one. But you have to find something to motivate you, ya know? Ralph starts off the podcast by talking about his road trip to Yankee Stadium last weekend. We then move onto some of the hot performers over the last week, including Rhys Hoskins, Dustin Fowler, Clint Frazier, Rafael Devers, Kolby Allard, and Walker Buehler. Finally, we save the best for last, and close the show by talking about Yoan Moncada and Aaron Judge. It’s the latest edition of the Razzball Prospect Podcast:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

During the winter I made a somewhat bold statement, that I’m not sure many agreed with it at the time. I stated that, I’d rather have Rhys Hoskins long term than Tommy Joseph. There was a great deal of skepticism regarding Hoskins 2016, mostly because it took place in the comfy confines of FirstEnergy (not a typo) Stadium. And really, who can blame them? The ballpark is so bananas, it tricked people into thinking Darin Ruf, and Dylan Cozens were actually good. That said, there was a lot to like about Hoskins profile,  FirstEnergy (not a typo) Stadium not withstanding. Throughout his professional career he’s hit for power (.233 ISO), average (.291), gotten on base (.375), and walked at a high rate (10.4%). He’s also done all this while striking out at a sub-20% clip. Tell me that doesn’t scream MLB worthy? In the offseason I was by far the high man on Hoskins, ranking him 57th in my top 100. Fast forward two and half months, and Hoskins is the new danger, hitting a robust .350/.447/.675 with 8 homers, and 15 RBIs in just 24 games. Meanwhile Tommy J struggles in Philly, and the calls for Hoskins in Philly get louder. Sure he’s a righthanded throwing first baseman, but Paul Goldschmidt scoffs at you scoffs at your concerns. I put my money where my mouth is on Hoskins, and dealt Nick Gordon, and T.J. Friedl in the Basbeall Prospectus expert league, The Devil Rejects, back in November, and am quite happy with how my gamble looks to paying off. This prospector’s word of advice, go get Hoskins. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this week in the minors.

Please, blog, may I have some more?