‘How could anything get past Grey Albright!’ you say in an incredulous tone. It’s true, it is very hard to sneak out from under Grey’s all-seeing ways. He is the fantasy baseball equivalent of the Eye of Sauron, though slightly less malicious. But we here at Deep League Thoughts (like how I tied my previous title into it’s own thinktank like it’s not just one lunatic behind these posts? Genius. Sheer, evil genius.) believe that sometimes all a guy needs is a chance for 500 ABs and Wilson Betemit could be an example of that.
Yes, I know, you just threw up in your mouth a little seeing Betemitas the title of this post. It’s ok, go rinse your mouth out, have a few saltine crackers and drink some 7-Up to calm your stomach. Feeling better? Now Mr. Wilson was supposed to be the next big thing at SS for the Braves in 1996, back when both he and I were pimply-faced teenagers. Now as a pimply-faced adult, I look back at Betemit’s career to see what went so wrong and truthfully it’s not easy to tell. His skill set is the same now as it was back then. He’s bad at defense, can’t hit lefties and strikes out a lot. He seemed relegated to the role of futility player no matter where he went. But over the last couple of years, Wilson has been able to put together quite a few at-bats, amassing 674 ABs between the Royals and the Tigers. Over that span, he’s managed to hit 21 HRs and 89 RBIs all while being a part-timer. Looking all the way back to the one season – 2006 between two teams – where he garnered at least 400 at-bats, he had 18 HRs with a palatable .263 batting average and a .469 SLG%. Now he’s in Baltimore, a place where strike-out artisans such as Mark Reynolds and Chris Davis have come to fan. ‘But wait’ you say, ‘don’t those two play Betemit’s two main positions now at 1st and 3rd?’. Very astute of you. But you know what other role Betemit can play? Designated Hitter.
Yes, at the moment, there is not any clear DH seemingly available to Baltimore right now. Maybe Nick Markakis takes that role for a bit when he returns, but their OF is thin. I have a hard time seeing that happening for long if at all. Let’s not forget Chris Davis is being given a chance at 1st and has proven nothing. If he doesn’t pan out, Reynolds can move to first and they can put Betemit back at 3rd. I’m not one to make bold predictions but if Baltimore’s lineup shakes out the way it is seeming like it could, I don’t see why Betemit isn’t somewhere in the 4~6 spot of that order, getting 450 ABs and hitting 20 HRs while driving in 80 RBI with a .260 average. Don’t like that? Well, go draft Martin Prado then while I hurl. Now hand me those saltines, please.
Ed Wade’s Toupee has made it clear that he’s trying to move Hunter Pence in a trade. Why would the Astros want to hold onto their best player? He just gives his fans false hope. False hope is worst than no hope. See every movie John Singleton’s done since Boyz n the Hood for examples of what hope can do to you. Awesome, the guy who did Boyz n the Hood is gonna remake Shaft. No, not awesome. Terrible. Thanks a lot, false hope! Speculation has Pence going to Atlanta, Philly or the Red Sox. Speculation has me excited to own Pence. Shoot, speculation sounds like salvation for Pence. If Pence were a car, I’d put on him a bumper sticker, “Anywhere but Houston.” His RBIs haven’t suffered as much as you might think considering where he is, but it can only get better. And his runs, his lineup protection, potentially his ballpark. I like it. It’s a win-win-maybe win scenario. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Kosuke Fukudome – The Indians acquired the Japanese OF to help fill the void left by Korean OF Shin-Soo Choo. Hopefully Fukudome doesn’t get hurt or else they may bring in a Taiwanese Little Leaguer.
Tyler Colvin – Was recalled. Still plenty of time to reach the 40 homer prediction of Matthew Berry. Go big or go home!
Drew Storen – Rumors are saying that the Nats weren’t willing to trade Drew Storen for Denard Span. And they shouldn’t. It’s not that important to save money on monogrammed bathrobes.
Ryan Zimmerman – 4-for-5. It should be a day of celebration for Zimmerman’s owners so it’s too bad I’m about to point out he has 5 homers and 20 RBIs on the year. As Mattingly would say as Morganna ran toward him, “What a bust.” Speaking of which, in the 80′s we had casual female nudity in movies and random hot girls running on the baseball field. Then in the 90′s we got no nudity and no one running on the field. Now, you get male nudity (don’t even start me about Friends With Benefits — why are you showing Justin Timberlake and not Mila Kunis? Am I not the target audience? Actually, don’t answer that.) and drunk idiot guys running on the field. Where did our country go wrong? Can’t we get back to random naked girls in movies and goofy Loni Anderson-type girls running on the field? Oh, and don’t look up recent photos of Loni Anderson on Google. Her plastic surgery makes Lisa Rinna’s lips look real.
Wade Davis – 6 IP, 5 ER vs. the A’s and the conshellation prize. All five runs were given up in the first inning then he settled down, but still the last time Tampa got hammered from Oakland this bad was when MC Hammer played last month at a Tampa farmers’ market.
Desmond Jennings – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs with his first homer and fourth steal in only six games while batting .500. After the game, he declared himself the new King of Slam & Legses, only when he said legses it didn’t sound weird because he’s perfect.
Brandon Allen – 1-for-2 with his 3rd home run and his first steal. My man’s playing with reckless a-Brandon! That’s 3 homers in 26 at-bats. That’s, a’la Larry David, prettaaaaaay prettaaaaaay good.
Jesus Guzman – 2-for-2 with his 4th homer and 2nd steal. I’ve been wanting to get on board with this guy for over a week now, but he’s been sitting every third game and not hitting righties well, i.e., what most pitchers are. If you can platoon him in deeper leagues, it’s worth a flyer.
Kyle Blanks – Now 2 for his first 20 with 11 Ks. At this point, the only way he’s going to be productive is if someone figures out a way to harness his windmill swing for electricity.
Edwin Encarnacion – 3-for-4 with his 8th home run. Last time he hit a home run, it was at the tail end of a 14-for-31 streak. This could be the start of another such run. And, yeah, ‘another such’ sounds lame. I’m aware.
J.J. Hardy – 3-for-5 with his 17th and 18th homers which is one homer behind Tulowitzki, who leads all major league shortstops. Orioles fans are now saying Cal Ripken who? Though they probably mean, “Are you talking about junior or senior?”
Mark Trumbo – 3-for-5 with 5 RBIs and only a single short of the cycle. He’s nothing special on AVG/OBP but 19 HRs and 53 RBIs in the AL West (see Smoak, Moreland, and Barton) should keep Trumbo off any blacklists.
Erick Aybar – 3-for-4 with his 21st steal. In the past two months, he’s hitting .255 with 7 steals. Cust kayin’.
Billy Butler – 1-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 10th homer or his third homer in as many games. Butler’s cups really runneth over.
Homer Bailey – 4 IP, 9 ER. It’s to the point where I wouldn’t own Bailey until he threw two months straight of quality starts.
Francisco Rodriguez – Since he waived his games-finished clause that would pay him $17.5 million, he hasn’t finished any games. K-Rod backwards is dork. Father-in-laws everywhere rejoice.
Lucas Duda – 2-for-4, 3 RBIs and he’s going to make an appearance in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell as I throw it to Lucas.
Daniel Murphy – 1-for-3 with 3 runs and a steal as he stays blisteringly hot. To point out the painful and obvious, he’s been better than Ryan Zimmerman. Fantasy baseball, making prematurely bald men bald faster.
Emilio Bonifacio – 2-for-4 with his 24th steal. His hitting streak is now up to 26 games. That makes sense in opposite world where I look like Paul Walker with a mustache and girls still like mustaches.
Mike Stanton – 1-for-3 as he hit his 24th homer. Actually, that’s not entirely true. He started to swing and the ball flinched 375 feet the other way.
Wilson Betemit – 1-for-3 with a home run. Has now hit in every game he’s started since his trade to the Tigers, which is a really nice way to say he’s hitting around .270 over the last week.
Brad Penny – 3 1/3 IP, 7 ER. The Tigers pitching box score sounds like a porn marquee — Penny, Furbush, Ruffin, Purcey and Coke. All to star in Motor City Mamas.
Stephen Drew to postpone all ballroom dancing classes for six to nine months with a fractured ankle. His wife Nancy isn’t gonna be happy. More time for mystery solving! If you haven’t seen the video of Stephen Drew, I’d wait for it on the big screen in Faces of Death: The Drew Edition, which will also feature J.D. throwing out his back, knee, shoulder, back again and ‘pulling up short.’ We probably won’t see Stephen again this year, so it’s fine to drop him. In his place, Cody Ransom, Quad-A/futility infielder. He has 25 homers in Triple-A this year, and 9 homers in about ten years of on again/off again major league service. You can probably do better. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Wilson Betemit – Castaway Wilson got volleyed to the Tigers yesterday. Betemit has never received any modicum of respect in his major league career, if I’m using the word modicum correctly. For the longest time, the Royals would drop the boom with prospect after prospect and Betemit would be MOS — ‘Mit Out Starting job — but now Betemit will take over 3rd base. Brandon Inge must feel Blind Sided by this. Maybe he should call Sandra Bullock or Big Mike to campaign for him. Every bone in your body tells you you shouldn’t own Betemit, but why are you listening to bones? Is that some voodoo shizz? If you’re struggling with your corner infidel in deep mixed leagues, Betemit could provide some pop and average. Of course, don’t drop anyone too worthwhile for him. Still no respect!
Casper Wells – This was what Leyland said when he sent Wells down, “It’s a crying shame. He doesn’t deserve to go down. This one hurts because the kid has done a hell of a job.” Apparently, the only thing harder than giving up Casper is giving up tobacco. If only there was a Casper Wells patch!
Duane Below – 5 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 2 Ks. He’s a pretty mediocre AL-Only option with a bleh K-rate in the minors. Plus, Duane Below sounds like a What’s Happening episode where Raj and Rerun lost their friend’s hair pick. Hey HEY….sob….hey.
Carlos Gomez – Broke his collar bone and will be out for a while. Maybe Lastings Milledge can work “poppin’ collars like Carlos Gomez” into a song.
Dan Haren – 4 1/3 IP, 7 ER. I thought we had a deal that someone was going to sneak into Haren’s room and turn the calender back to June?
Clayton Kershaw – 8 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 12 Ks. He looked better than Lincecum, in both a straight and gay way.
Andre Ethier – Has 9 homers, zero steals and a .299 average. Johnny Damon would be embarrassed by that line.
Dustin Ackley – 2-for-4 with his 4th homer in 26 games since he’s been called up. He’s almost surely going to be overrated next year. Damn you, half empty glass.
Chris Narveson – 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks. Next, he gets the Cubs, then the Astros twice. That’s a yes, please and thank you.
Jason Vargas – 3 IP, 5 ER. How very JV of him. Two straight bad starts, two reasons he should no longer be on your team.
Adam Dunn – Out with knee problems. Ironically, this year his fantasy owners were forced to take a knee.
John Danks – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks. Solid start in his return from the Disabled List. Or as Ozzie calls it, the Puta List.
Brad Lidge – Due back from rehab on Friday. I’d make sure he comes with return postage for when he gets hurt again. He won’t be the closer immediately, but the Phils merry-go-round closerousel could pick up in August.
Antonio Bastardo – Charlie Manuel hinted that Bastardo could remain the closer. I hope Madson enjoyed screwing Charlie Manuel’s daughter (I imagine she looks like Cletus from The Simpsons with boobs) because for some reason he’s in the dog house again. Or maybe Manuel was saying Madson would be the closer, but calling him a bastardo.
Vance Worley – 8 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks. He’d be cooler if his name was Van Swirley. Last time Worley pitched well, I said he shouldn’t be pitching this well, but you should pick him up until he stops pitching this well. Well, well, well…
Jimmy Rollins – 3-for-5, 4 runs, 3 RBIs and 2 homers. The Cubs were mowed down by Philly — back again! — with a little east coast swing by the J, the I, the M, the M, the Y, y’all!
Michael Martinez – 2-for-5 with 2 steals. Probably won’t hit over .240 but he has some speed and is playing while Polanco receives an epidural. Betcha Polanco wishes he chose natural childbirth.
Ryan Dempster – 3 IP, 6 ER as Dempster goes back to the dumpster.
Edwin Encarnacion – 3-for-5, 4 runs, a home run and two steals. Encarnacion goes through stretches where he gets crazy hot. Right now, hitting near .450 in the last week with three steals and a homer and 17 for his last 40. He’s a hot schmotato, ya’ll.
Travis Snider – 2-for-4, 5 RBIs and a home run. Really shouldn’t be on waivers in any leagues at this point.
Jayson Werth – 3-for-5, and his 11th home run. According to RCL updater, VinWins, Duffy’s Irish Pub in Washington, D.C. is matching beer prices to Jayson Werth’s average. 3 hits yesterday raised the price to $2.18. For where I live (Los Angeles), a bar could match Ruth’s lifetime slugging percentage and be a good deal.
Lonnie Chisenhall – 2-for-4 and a home run. Or as someone on Sportscenter probably said, Lonnie went gonnie.
Freddy Garcia – 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 7 Ks. When I see Garcia’s season ERA at 3.21, I get as incredulous as De Niro when Spider talks back to Pesci.
Eduardo Nunez – 1-for-3 with 2 steals. Now has 13 steals on the year (and 13 errors and 13 strikeouts and 13 times he’s name dropped Jeter to try and get laid).
Joe Nathan – 1 IP, 1 ER. Still recorded the save, but it’s worth noting he gave up a run. And noted.
Johnny Cueto – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks. Now has a season ERA of 1.98 as he went against Jeff Karstens (7 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 1 K) and his 2.28 ERA. To think we paid 20-something dollars for Gallardo in March… Cust frustrated.
Chase D’Arnaud – Now has 7 errors in 21 games played. More like Chase D’Ball.
Jacoby Ellsbury – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs with his 14th and 15th home runs. Member when I said in April Ellsbury and Gardner were the same player? I kill myself sometimes. Literally, I’m sticking my head in the oven.
Ricky Nolasco – 1 1/3 IP, 9 ER vs. the Padres. San Diego bats haven’t been used this much since Cinco de Mayo. Not sure if candy came out of Nolasco.
Will Venable – 2-for-4 with his 3rd homer as every hitter on the Padres got into the action. San Diego’s offense yesterday was like Ralphie beating up Farkus. Months of futility boiling up into an uncontrollable rage. I just picture Jason Bartlett kicking and screaming, “Fickin’, shmikin…”
Wilson Betemit – When Wilson Betemit was 15, the Atlanta Braves signed him to a contract. He hit .212/.270/.283 in his first year at rookie ball and .220/.301/.399 his second year. He was just 16.
The following year he got his act together as an enterprising 17-year-old posting an admirable .320/.383/.463 line. He snuck into the top 100 prospects before the following season and would remain on that list until the end of 2003. At one point, he was the 8th best prospect in all the land.
He debuted in the majors with the Braves in 2001 at age 19 and didn’t get enough at bats to do anything. However, he wouldn’t return to the bigs until 2004, as a seasoned veteran (he was 22). He didn’t fair all that well, but the next year he saw 274 plate appearances in the majors and went .305/.359/.435. That would be the best stretch of his career.
Since then, he was traded for Willy Aybar, Danys Baez and cash in one deal, Scott Proctor in another and (along with Jeff Marquez and Jhonny Nunez) for Nick Swisher and Kanekoa Texeira.
Finally, in 2010 – a shocking 14 years after he signed his first contract – he would seemingly find a home with the Kansas City Royals. He appeared in 84 games for the Royals and went .297/.378/.511.
At 29, this season, Betemit has gone .297/.358/.419. If you combine the last two years, you get 496 plate appearances and a .300/.375/.484 line with a 162-game average of 20 HRs.
This isn’t the most objective piece as I have about a bazillion Betemit rookie cards (and boy was he skinny). But, in my opinion, the only thing stopping Betemit from being a top 10 third baseman is playing time (and Mike Moustakas). A final Betemit line will look a lot like .290/.350/.440 with 13-15 HRs. What a long strange trip it’s been.
Jeremy Guthrie – In 2002, the Cleveland Indians made Guthrie the 22nd pick of the draft. He’d dominate AA and earn a quick promotion to AAA, where things didn’t go so well. He started the next season in AA hoping to rekindle the previous year’s promise. It didn’t work, nor did his promotion to AAA. In 2005, he spent the entire year at AAA and did nothing (5.08 ERA and 1.47 WHIP). Still he had a not completely miserable 2.04 K/BB ratio.
Finally, in 2006, at 27 years old, Guthrie would show promise at AAA: 3.14 ERA and 1.23 WHIP. However, he had little success with the major league club in very few innings and the Orioles plucked him off waivers. This might have been one of the smartest things that club has done in a decade.
In 2007, Guthrie showed all the promise of a late first rounder. He had a 2.07 K/BB rate, a 3.70 ERA, and 6.31 K/9 rate. While he has averaged 12 loses per year in his four full seasons with the Orioles, he also has a 2.20 K/BB rate, 4.06 ERA and 5.5 K/9 rate.
He has actually improved on those numbers, so far, in 2011, posting a 5.85 K/9 rate and 3.71 K/BB rate. For the first time in his career Guthrie is walking less than two batters per nine innings – significantly less.
What is most surprising is that batters are making more and better contact on strikes. His line drive rate is up and his ground ball rate is down. However, his BABIP is about where it has been for his career.
I’d be mildly surprised if Guthrie, all of a sudden, stopped walking guys. However, it isn’t a total mirage. By the end of the year, Guthrie will pitch 200+ innings with an ERA in the 3.80 – 4.00 range, 140 Ks and a very nice 1.25 WHIP. Can anyone say Tim Hudson? He’d look real good in an Indians uniform right about now.
Phil Humber – I’m not sure what Earl Weaver would say about a 6-man rotation, however it’s not as if one White Sox pitcher is discernibly better than another.
In fact, Humber might have one of the better pedigrees on the entire staff. He was the 3rd overall pick by the New York Mets in 2004. After the draft, Humber was immediately ranked the #50 prospect in all of baseball.
Unfortunately, he injured his elbow in his first start in AA in 2005 and was out of baseball recuperating for 377 days.
In 2008, he was traded to the Minnesota Twins as part of the Johan Santana deal. He didn’t show much promise for the Twins in AAA, walking over three batters per nine in his two seasons and allowing a ton of hits. Still, he did post a 7 and 6.5 K/9-rate, so there was some promise. However, not enough for the Twins to keep him around as he was granted his free agency
The Royals signed him in 2009 and on August 5, 2010 he earned a promotion. Twenty days later, Humber got his first major league win.
While he pitched reasonably well for the Royals, it was only 21.2 innings and he was placed on waivers. The Athletics took a run at him before, ultimately, the White Sox plucked him off the wire.
This year, Humber has pitched 67.2 innings for the Sox, posting a 3.06 ERA, 4.08 xFIP, 5.05 K/9 and 1.86 BB/9. Any way you slice it, he’s been good in a real world sense.
Humber is getting a decent swinging strike percentage (8.3%) and a pretty low contact rate (82.2%). In addition, batters don’t seem to be making great contact against him (16.1% line drive rate). Still, that .224 BABIP is not going to continue.
I really like the Humber story. I’m very happy for him. Not only did he overcome the surgery and journeyman waiver process, but he was also struck in the face by a line drive. I just can’t really advocate his fantasy ownership. At some point, he won’t be a full time starter, and, even if he continues to start, we’re looking at a 4.50 ERA at best, 5.4 K/9 and maybe 165 total innings.
AL-only seems like the only place for him. Still, if he could end up on a National League squad at some point, things could get more interesting.
Not that there’s anything wrong about being from NJ. Both Rudy and I are proud to be from NJ, though not in NJ. NJ ex-pats are great. We spread our love of high-haired women and capicola around the country. As for Jay Bruce, he’s sucking on the ol’ suckhole. You can say that again, but please don’t just say it again cause that’s lame; I really don’t like when people do that. Okay, random italicized voice. Though I have cut back to three cups of coffee a day, so that’s helped with my patience. Can I continue? Yup. We’re all on the same page that it’s only two weeks into the season, right? If Bruce had 12 homers in April and went into a two week slump, you’d care? Well, probably a little, but c’mon. It’s insane the amount of people in comments and our fantasy baseball forums ready to jump ship on Bruce. There’s no projection changes on him. He’s a hair away from what you’re going to get from Nelson Cruz. If you can trade a sucker owner seventy cents on the dollar for Bruce, you do that all day and twice on Muesday. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
BUY
David Murphy – Probably the number one hitter pick-up this week. How’s dem apples? Delicious! Murphy is worth a grab in all leagues while Hamilton tries to find someone to blame for his fragile body and awkward headfirst slide. Isn’t the first step accepting personal responsibility for your own shortcomings?
Sam Fuld – The other shoe is gonna drop any day now and Fuld will go back to hunting wabbits and being unownable.
Johnny Damon – I know, exciting! Next I’m gonna tell you to eat your vegetables and wear aqua socks in the locker room to avoid Athlete’s foot. The entire Rays offense started the season a week and a half late, Damon included. He’s far from a huge upside play, but he should be owned in more than 20% of leagues.
Daniel Murphy – Middle infidel options this week are boring with a dash of yawnstipating. The Mets seemed to figure out Emaus is sick as in unhealthy, not sick as in sick.
Maicer Izturis – Hey, hey, how ya doing? Maicer, what goes on, Maicer? Tomorrow, it’s Saturday, Saturday, it’s a Saturday. And it’s time for some bleh stats from Maicer.
Jamey Carroll – Um… Let’s see what positive I can say. He has a hot girl name? Yeah, I got nothing. He’s playing. That’s it.
Jed Lowrie – People seem to love good ol’ Jed. Well, move to Beverly Hills! He’s a pretty light hitting MI. Not much more than Polanco even with everyday ABs. He is hitting and playing right now though.
Jon Herrera – Won’t continue to be as valuable as he’s been this week, but he does have speed. SAGNOF!
David Freese – Lost Zimmerman? Turn your FML into YML (Yay My Life)! For a limited time only, Freese will adequately fill in with the outside chance of staying productive for the whole year.
Wilson Betemit – He’s an Own While Hitting, which needs a snappier name and it might find its way into the glossary.
Brian Fuentes – How is he owned in less than 40% of ESPN leagues? Did Andrew Bailey sign up for 60% of ESPN leagues?
Sean Burnett – Riggleman, who is not related to the Jigga man, says Storen will share chances, but Burnett is actually, ya know, getting saves.
Kyle Farnsworth – For those sitting in the back of the room, chewing on gum and passing notes, Farnsworth is the Rays closer.
Matt Thornton/Chris Sale/Sergio Santos – Mergio Thornsale is getting saves for the Pale Hose and they’re runny.
Chris Narveson – Was in last week’s Buy/Sell, is in this week’s, will he wear the Three Wolf Moon shirt and go for the Pat Riley-patented three-peat next week?
Zach Britton – You got your tickets for Wootstock, you eat Jujubes like they’re your acne medicine and Britton has been on your team since he was a junior in high school. Fair enough. For those non-mavericks reading along, you can add him, just watch out for certain match-ups.
Wilson Ramos – There was a pop group in Venezuela who translated all of Wilson Phillips’ music into Spanish. Their name was Wilson Ramos. A singer in Wilson Ramos was the daughter of the lead singer from the Mamis Y Papis. That is all completely true. The Nats have a lot of nothing with “At One Time My Nickname Pudge Was Literal Because of Steroids” Rodriguez. Ramos has a 12-homer bat. NL-Only or two catcher leagues take notice.
SELL
Vernon Wells – In my rankings, I said, “I wouldn’t draft Wells with your team. Ain’t worth the headache.” Take an aspirin and lose Wells.
Austin Jackson – I call this Sell column, “I told you I didn’t like these guys three months ago, except for Alvarez.” Jackson doesn’t have the crazy speed like some SAGNOF’ers, isn’t a good average guy despite last year and has little power. I.e., bleh, blech, belch.
Chone Figgins – I hate to dump him outright, so I’m not suggesting that. See if you can sell him to anyone for anything. Well, anything but Jamey Carroll.
Pedro Alvarez – I’m concerned, friends. He might hit .220 this year. I’m not telling you to drop him, but I’d see if I could sell him to someone who thinks they’re buying low. BTW, The other day I fielded a Pedro Alvarez question in person. So I met a girl who plays fantasy baseball. Of course, I thought this was terrific. Then I went out on a date with her and it felt like I was dating Random Razzball Commenter. “Do you like sushi?” “Um, yeah, yeah…So when I DL Hamilton, would you pick up David Murphy?” “Sure, wanna order edamame?” “That’s fine…” She looks at her cellphone, “Hey, Ben Francisco’s available too. And what do I do with Pedro Alvarez?” I want to thank all of you for ruining what should have been a great date.
