The Nats will probably bring Stephen Strasburg into Washington in the bubble car with the albino John Lannan charged with throwing rose petals at his feet.  This was recently overheard in the Nats bathroom sometime in the near future, “Um, John, do you think you can stop with the petals?”  “Stephen, it’s my duty.”  “Yeah, well, this is my doodie and I’m going to be about 20 minutes.”  “Fair enough, sire!”  I went over Strasburg for fantasy already.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Alex Trebek, “Nelson Cruz, Josh Hamilton and Ian Kinsler.”  What’s the deal with all of these Rangers having all the upside in the world but not being able to stay healthy?  Alex, “Um, okay, we would’ve also accepted, ‘Who are some Ranger players?’  Oh, and nice mustache.”   Nelson Cruz has hit the DL five times in his short career.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Clayton Kershaw went 4 and two-thirds innings, giving up three earned and 11 baserunners.  Six of those ducks on the pond were walks.  That’s 1-2-3-4-5-6 walks.  Versus the Pirates.  A team that had a .318 OBP last year.  Sure, this year they’re starting with Robot Jones, “I must kill the Queen,” but c’mon.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?