Here’s one way baseball could take cues from fantasy baseball. Yesterday, the Marlins announced that they’d be going to a closer-by-committee, which puts Steve Cishek in line for saves. If they had a fantasy baseballer (<–my mom’s term!) running their club, things would’ve been different down in South Florida.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Another week, another couple of awful performances from John Axford, who book-cased two perfect saves with blown saves against the Royals and Blue Jays. Coming into the season, Axford was one of the stronger closer options in the game, and was drafted behind only Craig Kimbrel, Mariano Rivera, Jonathan Papelbon, and Brian Wilson on average in preseason drafts.Please, blog, may I have some more?
We went over Danny Hultzen in our last fantasy baseball podcast, but that was a bunch of jibber-jabbering, you want the facts! Well, actually, there were some facts in there. Rudy, for instance, stated he thought Hultzen would be up by June 26th. Okay, that’s more of an opinion. Okay, facts. 1) When Hultzen was drafted last year, he was one of the top pitchers in the country and seemed most “major league ready.” 2) “Major league ready” is scout-speak for safe. 3) Fat Jonah Hill fired all the scouts. 4) He throws over 100 MPH. 5) I bet you didn’t know Fat Jonah Hill threw that fast. 6) Hultzen, on the other hand, throws his fastball 91-95 MPH. 7) His ceiling is slightly lower than the top arms in the minors. G) He walked a bunch of batters when he first arrived at a high level of competition, this might translate to the majors.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oakland Athletics: After surrendering 3 baserunners and 3 runs in a blown save Friday, Brian Fuentes is out of the 9th in Oakland. He no longer misses bats; he owns a solid 9.38 career K/9 with a 11.3% swinging strike rate, but his 2012 numbers check in at a much less impressive 6.45 K/9, supported by a diminished 7.0% swinging strike rate.Please, blog, may I have some more?
New York Yankees: On Friday, Jon Heyman reported that Rafael Soriano will remain the closer, even after David Robertson returns from his oblique injury in a week or two. I was a little harsh in my assessment of Soriano two weeks ago, as his May K/BB was a solid 3.67, vastly superior to his awful 1.17 ratio in April.Please, blog, may I have some more?
On Wednesday, Jon Lester gave a line of 6 2/3 IP, 4 ER, 10 baserunners, 7 Ks and I said he found the sweet spot between yawn and ho-hum. Some runs, bunch of hits and not at all dominating. It was just another run-of-the-mill start for Lester. Larry Johnson’s Grandmama could throw that line. Perhapizzle, I say, speaking like a hip-hop Yoda. “There is no try, there is only do-izzle and do not-fizzle.” Yo, Yoda, why you wear your Jedi robe so low? “Easy access, I like.” Maybe there was something else to that Lester start. Maybe, Columbo, things aren’t how they seem. Maybe I’m holding a container of Colombo yogurt and talking to it. Don’t judge me, but let’s judge Lester. That start was also his highest K-rate in one game this year, and he issued no walks. Some people are talking about how he’s got a new approach. He’s peacocking without the flair of Ks. He’s about the pitch-to-contact approach that Charley Lau would’ve enjoyed. Yeah, let’s take what makes us great and instead pitch so people can hit the ball against The Green Monster. You don’t need to hit every branch coming down the Rocket Scientist tree to think that makes no sense. If you have strikeout stuff, you strike people out. On Wednesday, he did that. I think that was a corner turned. June is always his best month, but he usually stays hot in the summer because he likes to keep things appropriate. I wouldn’t trade a top bat for him, but I think his owners are concerned and I’d definitely buy him for the right price. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Andrelton Simmons – Speaking of Star Wars, this guy’s first name sounds like a planet in one of those made up galaxies that Lucas sold at auction for $150,000. “Now up for bid, an imaginary planet in the Arkanis sector of the Outer Rim Territories. Do I hear one hundred thousand? We have a bid from the forty-something year old man with acne. No, not you, sir, the man next to you.” Simmons had 26 steals last year in High-A and 10 steals this year in Double-A through 43 games. He doesn’t look like he has burner speed, but in shallower leagues and very deep leagues I’d take a chance on him. I say those two types of leagues because in one options are so abundant that it’s good to take a flyer on someone for a week. If they take off, great! If they don’t, there’s other options and what did you miss? A week of EverCab? Big whoop. In very deep leagues, you take him because your other options are Daniel Descalso.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Seattle Mariners: After surrendering 6 ER and 13 baserunners in 4 appearances, Brandon League is out as the closer in Seattle. His 13/12 K/BB is not going to cut it, and his 7.6% swinging strike rate and career-worst 45.8% zone percentage don’t offer much hope moving forward.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Well, not much has changed for closers since last month when we did a run down of all of them. Kimbrel got a save, Axford got a save, and everyone else sucks. Holly Robinson Peete closers are a mess! I don’t think there’s ever been so many Brain Freezes before. I almost feel like adding an extra category below the Brain Freezes called, “The Legend of Gloom.” Wha’ happened? Did someone poison the bullpen water? Has Mariano Rivera made it so when he retires there won’t be any more closers? There will only be starters and “Those Other Guys.” To recap this month in closing quickly: Valverde has been less than stellar, Putz and Street just don’t close games, Motte hasn’t been good, Brian Wilson became Casilla who Bochy pulled after one batter during one game, Joel Hanrahananananan gave fantasy owners the question, “Who’s Juan Cruz?”, Sergio Santos may start throwing at some point in the next few weeks, the Red Sox gave the job to someone who has an over 10 ERA, Frank-Frank hasn’t had a blank-blank inning in forever, Kyle Farnsworth left stage right and Rodney, who couldn’t get saves last year, entered stage “I can’t believe Rodney’s closing games,” Guerra’s been about as bad as expected, Walden blew one save and lost the job, What the H.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Who really doesn’t love a song that isn’t closely related to baseball being the lead in? I mean I could have made the title Africa, same band, but further from the premise. So we are onto an update of those every crazy relievers that garner some attention but are like the guys buried in the lower left corner on Hollywood Squares.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Joakim Soria went from being a $12 Salad to a Donkeycorn to a Brain Freeze back to a Donkeycorn to off the list completely in 12 short months. And if this is the first post you’ve ever read at Razzball, I probably lost you by the eighth word. Later! In Soria’s wake is Broxton and Holland, who together can be called Hamsterdam. In other “Saves give me serious agita” news is Ryan Madson. He went from a donkeycorn to off the list. Donkeycorns are dropping like flies! Then there’s Drew Storen. He was touch ‘n go there for a day or two… Okay, for about a week or two, but it seems like he could be okay. Yet, he’s starting the year on the DL. Terrific. Since our last Closer Look, Beane told us Balfour got the closer job in Oakland and Chris Perez got the job back from Pestano, which has the Italian American Anti-Defamation League up in arms, but that’s the norm for them since they talk with their hands. Finally, Carlos Marmol had some nerve issues with his hand that many Razzball commenters opined was from too much internet porn surfing. Sounds like someone is empathizing. Anyway, here’s all the closers for 2012 fantasy baseball:
You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?Please, blog, may I have some more?