As a great man once said, “If you win your fantasy league, you will get the girl.” No, that wasn’t Bill Clinton talking at a nerd convention, but let’s pretend it was. Who wouldn’t want him as your wingman? Today, I’m here to help you get the girl in OPS leagues. Is the girl Tim Lincecum? No, that will be in a future article when I finally acknowledge the presence of pitchers. But until then, consider me a denier ever since I created the 5 x 0 fantasy baseball league. Now, I’m not a fan of outright punting positions in most cases, but there are times when I’m content waiting on a position if I don’t get one of the players I want early on (or middle on?). My online acquaintances, today I am here to detail some of the players at each position that I’m likely to grab in OPS leagues if I decide to wait on that position.

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With these top 20 3rd basemen for 2009 fantasy baseball, we finish off the twenty lists for the infield.  From weakest to strongest, the top 20s go top 20 catchers, top 20 shortstops, top 20 2nd basemen, top 20 third basemen then top 20 1st basemen.  The outfielders will be coming up next, and I’m sure they’ll be deeper than all of these lists, but that’s just by virtue of the sheer number of them.  If you want some overall perspective, look at our 2009 Fantasy Baseball Player Rater.  In addition, there’s a list of every player who has multiple position eligibility.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2009 fantasy baseball:

1.

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The other day we went over the top 20 catchers for 2009 and today we look at the top 20 1st basemen for 2009 fantasy baseball. This was after going over our top 10 for 2009 fantasy baseball and top 20 for 2009 fantasy baseball.  All this can be found in the 2009 fantasy baseball rankings page.  This top 20 list could probably go to 40 and still have worthwhile names on it, so after we go through all the top 20 lists for every position, maybe I’ll add some more.  Is this the 28th day of Christmas or some shizz?  No, I’m just real giving like Bono and Chris Tucker on an Africa trip.  As with the catchers, the first basemen are broken up into tiers.  Also, there’s some guys below other guys that I want more.

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In our series of 2009 fantasy sleepers, I take a detour down my own personal Heartbreak Hill.  Anyone who has read this site for a few knows I had a huge crush on Alex Gordon going into the 2008 season, so it’s with great regret I must confess, “Gordon, I can’t quit you.”  That’s right, I’m pegging Gordon as a fantasy sleeper for the 2009 season.  Real shame I’m a moron, huh?  I wanted to ignore Gordon in 2009, but I just couldn’t.  When Katy Perry sang, “You’re yes then you’re no… You’re in then you’re out… You’re up then you’re down… We fight, we break up… We kiss, we make up…”  She was prolly talking about me and Alex Gordon.  I’m Josh Hamilton and Gordon’s my crack cocaine.  You reap what you sow and Gordon has dibbled his way into my heart.  Whoever started the Brian Shouse Fan Club, I hereby hire you to do a similar site for Alex Gordon.   I will pay you in adulation and expired cigarette coupons.  So what can we expect from Gordon for 2009 and why is he a fantasy sleeper?

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Okay, the Final Jeopardy answer is 107/40/118/.302/8.  Do do do do do do do do… doot do do do do do do… What is Bill James predicting Chris Davis will do in 2009? That’s correct! “What is Bill James smoking?” would have also been accepted.  Those numbers look a lot like MVP numbers.  I’ll shave my ‘stache if Chris Davis wins the MVP in 2009.  That’s right, I said it!  Marcel Projections have Chris Davis in 2009 at 54/16/55/.288/3.  Our 2009 Fantasy Baseball Projections, which is using only the Marcel Projections as of right now, has Chris Davis at -3.23 in 313th place.  Between Akinori Otsuka and Tom Gordon, one guy who didn’t pitch last year and another guy who hasn’t pitched well since Stephen King wrote a book about him.  And I think Stephen King gave up writing books to write for EW ten years ago.  There’s got to be some in between with these projections, doesn’t there?

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Colby Rasmus goes by the nickname Razz or Razzle-Dazzle, which should make him a favorite here at Razzball, but there’s something pricky about him that I don’t like.  Might be the name, Colby.  It sounds like a total douche name, like a character’s name in a Bret Easton Ellis novel.  (Speaking of douche, I have two things to say.  First, I went to the original Dollar Store the other day.  No, not some weird field trip.  Like, “Hey, honey, you wanna go check out the very first Dollar Store?

Please, blog, may I have some more?