Russell Branyan

Grey

MmmFlop

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 126 Comments

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Tommy Hanson‘s line yesterday was one and two-thirds innings and eight earned runs.  Yes, you’ve been Pwnson’d.  Hanson said he felt dizzy during the game, I’m sure his owners can sympathize.  Hanson has an ERA of 4.18 on the year and back to back bad starts.  Try and put a pine tree air freshener on that and it still stinks.  Going into this year, I steered clear of Hanson.  I was legitimately worried about his innings pitched jump from ’08 to ’09.  So sell fast right now?  Not so fast, Paulo.  I’m going under the assumption that you don’t own him because you listened to me in the preseason.  Hanson has a tremendous K-rate and his walks have been fine.  Even yesterday it was an ill-timed homer to Votto that did him in.  Do I think Hanson could still be a risk because of his innings last year?  Yup, you betcha.  But I’d buy him for 50 cents on the dollar.  It depends how cheap you can swindle his dramatized owner.  It takes alligator blood to check raise to the bed wetter.  Anyway, here’s what else saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Brooks Conrad – If you didn’t see the end of the Braves game, you should try to catch the Brooks Conrad homer.  Unlike Nix.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Hey Ya! Andre’s Out, Cast?

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 142 Comments

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No, there’s probably no cast in Andre’s future.  I’m not even sure they make casts small enough for the pinkie finger.  That was Pingping‘s downfall, that and the chain smoking.  After Andre Ethier broke a bone in his pinkie, he said something was seriously wrong.  Seriously?  You got a boo-boo on your pinkie!  What, you can’t make shadow animals now?  When he found out what it was, he said that it’s the leverage point of his swing and it would prevent him from holding the bat the way he normally does.  Who’s leverage point is their freakin’ pinkie?!  This is like the pea under the princess’s mattress.  His biggest concern is probably how he can stick his pinkie out while drinking tea.  Ethier could be out for a few weeks or he can play through it.  So he’s damned if he does or a half dozen of the other… Or however that cliché goes.  If it is his leverage point, you don’t want him playing through it.  If he doesn’t play through it, he could be out at least a few weeks.  And here I thought the only time Ethier and the word pinkie would be associated would be from this picture.  Draw your own conclusions, but I’m guessing he’s in Key West.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Chad Billingsley – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks.  What every pitcher needs, a trip to Petco.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Javy Nagila

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 154 Comments

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Javier Vazquez went seven innings, giving up 2 ER with 7 baserunners and recording 7 Ks as he lowered his ERA to 8.10.  Though, he could’ve gave up 6 runs in 7 innings and would’ve lowered his ERA.  Do I think Javy released his inner leprechaun and found the pot on the other side of his crappy pitching?  Yes and no.  There was no way Vazquez was going to pitch a 9.78 ERA all year.  I mean, c’mon, that was obscene.  He had given up more runs than innings.  He was getting Pwnson’d every time out.  The rest of the way he should be around a 4 to 4.50 ERA guy.  There’s room to own that, but don’t expect last year this year, clear?  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Phil Hughes – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks and now has a 1.38 ERA on the year.  I really wanted to own Hughes this year.  Alas, it didn’t happen.  Alas II, I did draft Joba.  Alas III, I dropped Joba before he got any saves.  Alas IV, there’s no Alas IV.  Dur.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Show Your Huevos, It’s Holland’s Days

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 337 Comments

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Derek Holland is not officially a rookie, but that doesn’t mean he might not roofie you.  Pitching in and out of the rotation last year, he had some real ulcer-inducing starts.   I know, I have the internal scars to prove it.  Oh, Mylanta!  Though his xFIP was better than his actual ERA.  I know, too bad your league isn’t all fussy with an xFIP category.  Holland’s a plus-plus strikeout guy.  In the hitter-friendly PCL, he had a 37:7 K:BB rate and a 0.93 ERA.  He’s homer-prone and in Arlington that is a recipe for turd nuggets.  I’m much more aggressive about grabbing young hitters than young pitchers.  Hitters give you an 0-for-34 and you punt.  A pitcher gives you a 2 IP, 7 ER start and that causes you to punch a random stranger and then next thing you know some guy named Bubba is fitting you for a teardrop tattoo.  See how quickly that spiral spun downward?  Ask Lawrence Taylor, he’ll tell you.  So I didn’t grab Holland anywhere, but I would in the right circumstances, as long as you monitor where you start him.  His first two outings are set for the A’s and Angels.  That’s a “Yes, please” and “Don’t mind if I do.”  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Johnny Cueto – 9 IP, 1 hit shutout with 8 Ks as he dropped his ERA to 4.07 on the season.  And there’s why I liked him so much in the preseason.  If he’s out there in your league, own him, in the non-biblical sense.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Frasor Rescued From Dying Chambers Of Middle Relief

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 106 Comments

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The Jays have all but conceded the closer role to Jason Frasor.  They must love Frasor’s witticisms!  See if you can trade Kevin Gregg for Nadir Bupkus.  Otherwise, I’d drop him as soon as it’s official, which it may be by the time you read this.  Gregg’s not worth the stack of napkins you’re using until you buy more toilet paper.  I moved Frasor up my Closer Look from the other day.  His days of brain freezing could be behind him quickly; he can easily be a donkeycorn by May.  Gregg isn’t much of a challenge to Frasor and Gaston seems content with Downs in middle relief.  Anyway, here’s what else happened over the weekend in fantasy baseball:

Jon Rauch – The Twins are going with the dreaded closer-by-committee.  (Rauch moved down that same Closer Look.)  Matt Guerrier will see some save chances, Jose Mijares could see some situational saves, but I think Rauch will see the majority.  I own Rauch and Guerrier in different leagues.  If there’s one bullpen that can pull through losing their closer, it’s the Twins.  In years past, I’d say they definitely would ride it out, meaning no trade.  But they’re opening a new park and I think they want their fans to think they’re out there trying their best, so I think they acquire a closer, namely Heath Bell.  When will they acquire him or someone?  Either very soon, or June assuming they’re still in the race.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Figgy To Steal 2nd Base Against His Own Team?

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 88 Comments

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We all know Chone Figgins loves stealing 2nd base, but he might be starting early this year. After a brisk calisthenic session, Don Wakamatsu decided to try Figgy at 2nd base with Jose Lopez shifting to 3rd base.  The Mariners haven’t had this amount of speed at 2nd base since they faced David Eckstein and Ichiro moved up 50 steps.  Suddenly, Figgins’s Sparky Anklebiter power and top tier speed looks much better.  It would catapult him to the top 7 of the top 20 2nd basemen for 2010.  I’d rank him right after Cano and in a promising tier.  Going for steals at 2nd base wouldn’t hurt nearly as much at 3rd base.  But he’s not there yet and, frankly, I don’t think the move to 2nd is going to happen, barring an injury to Jose Lopez.  When you have players comfortable at their position, you don’t mess with it for s’s and g’s.  But since we’re going down this road, it helps Jose Lopez’s value too.  Not as much though.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 1st Basemen for 2010 Fantasy Baseball

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 60 Comments

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The top 10 and 20 for 2010 fantasy baseball are in the bag, along with the top 20 catchers.  Today, Razzballers, we look at the top 20 1st basemen for 2010 fantasy baseball.  All this shizz can be found under the 2010 Fantasy Baseball rankings.  This top 20 list of 1st basemen is the opposite of the catchers, it is bursting at the seams like you at a Hometown Buffet.  Speaking of gorging yourself, as I mentioned elsewhere, I want a top 1st baseman on my team in 2010.  Sure, the list is deep, but 10 of these guys will probably be gone by the 4th round.  Do you really want to go to battle with, say, Derrek Lee when someone else has, say, Ryan Howard?  I don’t.  I want to be one of the teams with a top 1st baseman.  This list will get additional 1st basemen added to it in the way of sleeper posts like I added Kendry Morales last year.  As with the other rankings, the first basemen are broken up into tiers with my projections included.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 1st basemen for 2010 fantasy baseball:

1.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 3rd Basemen, 2009 Fantasy Baseball

| 2009 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 95 Comments

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Catchers, 1st basemen, 2nd basemen and shortstops for 2009 have been accounted for.  Up now, the top 20 3rd basemen for 2009 fantasy baseball.   Lots of surprises in the top 20 for 3rd basemen.  On top, Mini-Donkey, Figgy, Longoria and Kung Fu Panda, which sounds like an anime cartoon that has a 75% chance of giving you a seizure.  (BTW, anyone ever watch anime?  It’s about giant robots that want to be loved.  That shizz is depressing.)  Then when you get to around the halfway mark-o, the drop off is precipitous.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Kneecap ‘N Crunch

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 58 Comments

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Chad Qualls is probably done for the season.  The closer shituation isn’t going to be pretty in Arizona, unfortunately.  We’re looking at a closerousel.  I’d list the candidates in this order:  Juan Gutierrez, Clay Zavada, Esmerling Vasquez, Daniel Schlereth and Blaine Boyer.  Reading those names again, I vomited into a trash bin and the ghost of Hoyt Wilhelm materialized and said in a British accent, “Be careful, Grey.  Gutierrez is iffy at best and Zavada can’t see past his mustache when he pitches from the stretch.”  Because times are lean for saves in a few of my leagues, I’ll cop to grabbing the first two guys.  Careful about going with any of them if you don’t need saves.  But really, who doesn’t need saves?  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Krispie Young – In America, everyone gets a 2nd chance — John Travolta, Michael Vick and the police officer from The Village People.  Maybe people get 2nd chances in Kathmandu.  I don’t know.  I’ve never heard anyone say, “Everyone gets a 2nd chance in Kathmandu.”  Krispie returns to the majors and should be play nearly every day.  What can we expect?  Nothing.  How’s that optimism?  But what can he do?  Well, he’s been hot in his recent Triple-A stint and he had a decent 2nd half last year.  Absolute ceiling of expectations would be 4 homers and 4 steals in September.  It’s not going to save your team, but it could help.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Doc

J.P. Ricciardi Takes A Salary Dump

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 159 Comments

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Our fearless leader has been crippled by some Kryptonic supermarket macaroni salad so I will be your tour guide through the daily baseball comings and goings.

So J.P. Ricciardi waved goodbye to Alex Rios and freed up some money so he can buy some tickets to Moneyball The Movie and to get one of them new-fangled Adam Dunn verification machines for his phone.  Rios hasn’t been great outside of Toronto this year, but The Cell isn’t exactly Petco Central.  He actually has picked it up a bit going 6-14 with 2 home runs in his last 4 games.

Please, blog, may I have some more?