Fantasy Baseball Advice

It’s trade deadline time, a full baseball weekend, and Grey is at a crawfish festival asking ladies whether he has any chum in his moustache.  Anyway, the Indians spoiled the Yanks and Sawx plans by nabbing Ubaldo for a bunch of prospects including their top two pitching prospects (Drew Pomeranz and Alex White).  Moving to the AL Central is definitely better for Ubaldo’s stock than the AL East and you’d think moving a mile closer to sea level for home games would help in the long run.  I expect a good finish this year for him as ALers adjust to his stuff.

As for Pence, what a shocker that Philadelphia and Houston made a trade!  Ruben Amaro Jr. is like the jerk in a fantasy baseball keeper league who keeps tapping the same goober (Ed Wade) for advantageous trades.  The Phillies got Brad Lidge and Roy Oswalt the past two years and the Astros have Brett Wallace, JA Happ, and (had) Michael Bourn to show for it.  Time will tell whether the prospects in this trade are worth it but the change in scenery should definitely help Pence.  He hit 5th on Sunday which should give him some solid RBI opportunities behind Utley and Howard.  Plus, he can look forward to many Pence-sylvania puns!

In other news…

Erik Bedard - The Red Sox nixed a trade with Oakland for Rich Harden because of injury concerns and then ok’d a trade to Seattle for Erik Bedard.  When pressed on why they signed off on Bedard but not Harden, Red Sox doctors pointed out that Bedard’s right arm looked a lot healthier than Harden’s.  We’re disappointed they didn’t pull off both trades.  They could put Erich Bedarden as the probable starter and then start the healthy one.  Suffice it to say, going from Seattle to Boston should only help Bedard’s Wins, hurt his ERA/WHIP, and maim non-New Englanders’ eardrums during unsuccessful home starts (You sahck cahk Bedahd!).

Michael  Bourn - Traded to Atlanta for Jordan Schafer and the Atlanta B-prospect orchestra.  This was all news to him when he woke up today in the wrong part of Atlanta, not knowing how he got there.  Luckily he outran all his attackers until he was able to surmise his past role as a SAGNOF operative.

Rafael Furcal - Traded to the Cardinals.  McCourt offered to send a $10,000 check as well if the Cards could just wire him $5,000.  No real change in value for Furcal.  He’s barely startable when healthy and barely healthy when he starts.

Dee Gordon - With Furcal traded, the Dee Gordon era has arrived in LA.  Dodger fans, SAGNOF fans, and What’s Happening fans, rejoice!

Doug Fister - The Mariners traded Fister to a team (Tigers) where he might have a chance at the occasional win.  Fister has 3 wins and 12 losses (only 2nd in the AL to Jeremy Guthrie’s 13 losses) despite a 3.33 / 1.17 ERA/WHIP.  Fister’s lack of K’s (5.5 Ks) makes him only spot start worthy in shallow mixed leagues.  I just wish Seattle would’ve added catcher Adam Moore to the deal to preserve possibly the best pitcher-catcher battery of all-time (Fister-Moore).

Chris Davis - He’ll finally get his 3rd chance to prove he’s a major league hitter after getting traded with Tommy Hunter to Baltimore for Koji Uehara.  If he’s your best option at cornerman, my condolences.   I can see Chris Davis and Mark Reynolds becoming great friends, swapping tips on how to walk back to the dugout after striking out.

Brandon Allen - Man, just when Arizona started playing him, they trade him to the A’s for Brad Ziegler.  Allen is getting sent to AAA for now but I wouldn’t be surprised if he gets called up soon.

Paul Goldschmidt - With Allen out of town, the Diamondbacks plan to call him up to take over at 1B.  He’s shown great power and I’d give him a flier as a corner power option.  I predict he’ll surpass Jason Schmidt (7) and end up with the 2nd most career HRs for someone with Schmidt in their last name.

Mike Adams – Traded to the Rangers for two pitching prospects where he apologized to all owners who held onto him in mixed leagues hoping he’d inherit the Padres closer job when Heath Bell was traded.  He’s still worth owning as a middle reliever – especially as a handcuff if you own Feliz.

Ryan Ludwick - Traded to the Pirates.  His value moves from yaaawwwn to yawn.  Once Tabata comes back, this is going to mean a big drop in playing time for Garrett Jones.

Derrek Lee – Also traded to the Pirates.  He’s been hitting of late and is serviceable when on a hitting streak.   In related news, if your beer league softball team needs a 1B, Lyle Overbay is available.

Orlando Cabrera - Traded to the Giants as Sabean is looking for the right mix of Tejada’s over-the-hillness and Brandon Crawford’s weak bat.

Lance Berkman – Returned after a few days off to hit a 3-run HR on Sunday.  That’s 28 HRs in 308 ABs.  See Colby, that’s what happens when you listen to the Cardinals coaches.  Although, it should be said, that McGwire’s success with Berkman is largely because Lance pictures a Big Mac in place of McGwire’s face when getting batting tips.  If only the Astros had hired Mayor McCheese as batting coach…

Justin Verlander – Took a no-hitter into the 8th inning for the 3rd time this year, outdueling AL Cy Young front-runner Jered Weaver in a 3-2 win.  He’s now 15-5 with a 2.24 ERA, 0.87 WHIP, and 178 Ks in 181 IP.  Almost every award prediction I made this preseason looks awful except Verlander for Cy Young.  If only I drafted him on one of our teams.

Jered Weaver – Lost the duel against Verlander to ‘fall’ to 14-5 with a 1.88 ERA and 0.94 WHIP.  Worse yet, he got ejected for throwing one high and tight on pitch after Carlos Guillen took a few minutes to admire his HR.  While I can see why Weaver was mad, he needs to realize that might’ve been one of the only notable accomplishments for Guillen in like 4 years.  Let the man have his moment.

Domonic Brown – Sent down to AAA as the Phillies decided John Mayberry at least lets them put out an MVP outfield (Mayberry, Victorino, Pence).

Joe Saunders - Oh the joys of pitching in the NL West.  He’s followed up a complete game victory @SD with a 7.2 IP, 2 ER win against LA.  He’s got another start coming up against the Dodgers which makes him a pretty solid streaming candidate.

Jeremy Hellickson – The H-E-double hockey st-ickson is bringing the Devil back into the Rays.  He got his 10th win of the year albeit against the Mariners and with only 2 Ks in 7 IP.  At 10-7, Hellickson and Pineda are battling for top non-Roofie this year.

Brett Wallace / Chris Johnson – The ineffective corners of Houston were sent down to AAA.  This will finally give some playing time to top prospects…..oops, those are their top prospects.  That’s the bad karma you get when you play in the park formerly known as Enron Field.  Unlike Ed Wade, at least the Enron executives got to feel like the ‘Smartest Men in the Room’ for a little while.

Jason Bourgeois – Slam and legs with an extra side of legs for the upper class Astro.  With Michael Bourn and Hunter Pence gone, Bourgeois should get plenty of time to hit at the top of the lineup and steal bases.  Given the current state of the Astros lineup (Bourgeois hit 3rd on Sunday!), he better steal during his first 3 ABs because there may not be a 4th AB.

Emilio Bonifacio - His hitting streak was snapped at 26 games but he did hit a HR on Sunday.  Mr. Dimaggio, you dodged a bullet.  Mr. Bonds, hope you’re ready for some Boneface.

Johnny Cueto – Threw a 3-hit shutout against the new look Giants offense.  Why can’t Volquez take a sip of whatever Cueto is drinking (1.72 ERA / 0.98 WHIP)?

Coco Crisp – 3 SBs to tie his career high from last year at 32 SBs.  No wonder why Ice-T loves him so much.

Juan Nicasio - 7 IP, 1 ER and 10 Ks at San Diego – his first good road start this whole year.  I’d say he’s a great bet for K’s but he has only K’d more than 6 in one other start…..@COL against the Padres (9 Ks).  The R0ckies should rest him for a few weeks and then start him every game in their next series with San Diego.  Also, not for nothing, if his parents had gringo’d his name to John, he could have had the best 80′s keyboardist name of all time (Johnny Casio).

Roger Bernadina – In the midst of an 0-for-17 slump (or 8-for-50 if you want to go back further), the Nats sent him down to AAA.  For the love of SAGNOF, WTF?!  Ankiel owners should benefit the most from this although, if anyone owns Ankiel in a shallow mixed league, they probably checked out 3 months ago.  On Sunday, the Nats decided to start Brian Bixler in CF.  This is the Brian Bixler whose awful bat (.177/.237/.227 in 203 ABs) wasn’t good enough for Pittsburgh’s SS position (when they sucked).  This was the equivalent of Bixler taking a bat and hitting Bernadina in the balls – assuming Bixler would actually make contact.

Brandon McCarthy - Two straight wins for McCarthy after dispatching the Twins yesterday with a 9 K effort.  He’s doing his part to rid the McCarthy name of its embarrassing affiliation with Communist witch-hunts, vaccination witch-hunts, and falling for redheads from the wrong side of the tracks.  If you leave Brandon, don’t leave now!

Dustin Moseley - The NL Doug Fister (3-10 despite a 3.30 ERA) went on the 15 day DL with a bad shoulder on his non-pitching arm.  That’s weak.  Jim Abbott pitched just fine with a bad arm on his non-pitching shoulder.

Orlando Cabrera taxied into Cleveland yesterday.  Does Cleveland’s middle infield of Orlando and Asdrubal remind anyone else of an embarrassing moment at Epcot that I blamed on a 5-year-old?  Probably just me.  Hopefully not too many mixed leaguers are doing handstands over this news.  Orlando Cabrera is good for 7-10 homers and 7-10 steals and by “good” I mean bad and not bad as in good.  Too bad Cabrera’s first name doesn’t start with an S, then he can be S-Cab.  Anyway, here’s some other fantasy baseball news:

Scott Podsednik – Signed with the Blue Jays.  Don’t the Jays already have Podsednik but call him Rajai Davis?  Perplexing news to say the least, though saying the least wouldn’t have me saying anything.  Maybe the Jays signed Podsednik because his wife keeps morale up around the clubhouse.  Wokka, wokka, wokka.  Right now, Podsednik will work as a fourth outfielder and will probably see around 400 ABs.  I’m not too concerned about Davis, Snider or Juan Rivera’s playing times.  They all need a rest once in a while and Rivera can’t stay healthy.

Joe Nathan – Threw off the mound yesterday.  He’s sure trying to make me look bad for saying he won’t be ready for the start of the season, that Nathan’s a hot dog.  I’d still be tentative about drafting Nathan and would grab Capps real late as the handcuff.

Kendry Morales – Said that he might not be ready to go on Opening Day because of the rehabilitation for his limp-off homer.  Only thing less surprising than this would be if Morneau announces he has lingering concussion symptoms.  Since pulling a Kotchman started on the Angels, it’s only appropriate that Kendry carries on the tradition.  Seriously, Al Green mended a broken heart quicker than Morales and his stupid leg.  Put on a cast, grab a wire hanger for itching and be done with it.  I didn’t want to draft Morales before, as my top 20 1st basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball shows, this news doesn’t help matters.

Russell Branyan – Signed with the Diamondbacks.  I.e., Brandon Allen can’t get a break and this sure doesn’t help Juan Miranda’s value.  I’ll never understand why a team going nowhere would sign a go-nowhere vet rather than give their youngsters a chance.  Guess that’s why they’re going nowhere.  As for Branyan, if you can platoon him in NL-Only leagues vs. righties, he could get you 20+ homers in 400 ABs.

Joel Hanrahan – Was announced Hanrahanananan would be the closer for the Black & Yellow, Black & Yellow, Black & Yellow over Evan Meek.  Hanrahanananan should be a solid donkeycorn by the time May rolls around.  You can continue to draft Meek, but you might look a little desperate.

You know that slo-mo video of Homer Simpson taking a cannonball off his belly?  This looked more painful. When Carlos Santana, the future of the Indians franchise, went down in this collision, his knee said, “I wish I were Joe Theismann’s knee.”  To stay in the world of The Simpsons, you can see the exact moment when Cleveland’s heart breaks.  Carlos Santana’s collision was like The Decision, Part II.  Only more ghoulish.  I’d be shocked if Santana’s back this year.  Hopefully, he’ll be fine for next year.  On the bright side, Cleveland, you’re still not Detroit.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Shelley Duncan – 4-for-5, 1 Run, 2 RBIs.  Surprised there weren’t any other injuries reported from Shelley Duncan high fives.  He’s always so intense.  Here’s him taking questions after the game.

Adrian Beltre – 2-for-3, 2 homers and 5 RBIs.  Ever wonder how Stonehenge was built?  Beltre did it in a contract year.

Kevin Youkilis – Day-to-day with a jammed thumb.  My grandmother used to make a delicious thumb jam.  I miss you, Minky!

John Lackey – 5 1/3 IP, 6 ER, 14 baserunners, 7 Ks.  I dropped him about two starts ago.  He then went out and threw a shutout, then a quality start.  That gave someone confidence to pick him in my league and start him vs. the Indians.  Muahahahahahaha…

Trevor Cahill – 9 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks.  His K:BB 73:41 in 125 2/3 IP isn’t good.  His xFIP is almost a run and a half worse than his ERA.  Yet, his 0.99 WHIP and 2.72 ERA make me wish he were beguiling me while I owned him.

Jeremy Hellickson – 7 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks.  I don’t know what the line looks like to you, but I watched 95% of this start.  Looked dominating through three and worked around a cheap walk and hit in the fourth, remaining composed.  With ease, he was hitting 92 and 93 with his fastball and controlling his off-speed pitches well.  He was also sent down right after the game.  If you’re out of it in keepers, I’d grab him right now and hold on.

B.J. Upton – 3-for-4 with 3 steals.  Well, if it ain’t the Bossman clocking in four months late.

Matt Joyce – 2-for-4 with 3 homers in the last week.  He’s not going to win any batting titles, but he does have pop and he’s playing every day.

Dan Wheeler – Got the save since Rafael Soriano had worked three days in a row.  Gives you a hint of where Qualls is in the pecking order.  See, the guy in the Buddy Holly glasses isn’t as dopey as he looks.

Carlos Pena – Was walking on crutches today.  No, it’s not a new dance craze, he has a sore foot.

Justin Morneau – Tried to hit in the cages but couldn’t do it.  It’s being speculated that he’s weeks away.  Just-Morn, indeed.

Matt Kemp – 5-for-5, 3 RBIs and his 18th homer.  Kemp collected more hits yesterday than he had collectively in the last 8 days.  He hasn’t had a crazy hot streak all year.  Now would work for me.  Get to it!

Travis Wood -7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 4 Ks.  You didn’t need to be Ms. Cleo to know this was going to be a nice start for him vs. the Pirates.  I’d definitely own him going forward, just be ready to jump ship.

Orlando Cabrera – Left the game with a strained oblique and is headed to the DL.  Can’t wait until fifty years from now a player has a groundbreaking surgery to fix obliques and then it’s named after him.  Say the Ken Griffey Jr. Jr. Jr. Surgery.

Joey Votto – Sat out yesterday with a sore wrist.  Get well soon, Joey!

Joel Hanrahan – Entered a losing game in the 8th.  Take whatever you want from that.   Still think him and Meek are both vying.  Vie, baby, vie!

Rick Ankiel – 2-for-4 as he started vs. a lefty.  Cox may be playing Ankiel more than Melky because he’s a better fielder.  Doesn’t make Ankiel mixed league material yet, but it’s worth monitoring.

Randy Wells – 4 IP, 6 ER, 10 baserunners, 5 Ks.  I don’t believe he even wanted to pitch well for the last month.  He just wanted to build confidence up in me so he could do this to me.  Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, and why do you keep fooling me?  Are you mad at me or something?  It’s not cool.

Ryan Braun – 5-for-7, 3 Runs, 2 RBIs.  Prince Fielder; 5-for-7, 2 Runs, 5 RBIs.  McGehee; 2-for-5 with a homer.  Hart; 4-for-7.  Alcides; 3-for-5. Edmonds; 2-for-3… Even Counsell went 2-for-2.  Honestly, I’m not even sure how this game is over.  There doesn’t seem like there were enough outs made.  Did the Cubs forfeit?

Jake Westbrook – 6 IP, 2 ER, 5 baserunners, 7 Ks.  Yes, this looks like a positive sign moving forward, but it was against the Astros.  I’d still be cautious outside of NL-Only leagues.

Sean Burnett – 1 2/3 IP and his first save.  Somehow Sean is the Burnett you want to own.  Go figure.  Or don’t.  Your choice.  Storen pitched 2 innings on Sunday and Burnett entered to face lefties originally.  He’s worth owning if you’re hurting for saves, but Burnett will be mostly a situational closer.

Chase Headley – 4-for-5, 3 Runs, 3 RBIs and his 8th homer.  Nicest thing Headley ever did was have this game on a short schedule day so I didn’t have him on my bench.

Yorvit Torrealba – 3-for-5 and batting near .600 over the last ten games.  I doubt it lasts forever, but if you just lost Santana, Yorvit’s hot.

Andrew Bailey – Won’t return when he’s eligible on Friday, but could return soon after.   If you think the only German words that have a place in baseball are bratwurst, sauerkraut, and lager, I hear ya, but I’d own Wuertz while Bailey mends.

Ryan Howard – Headed to Philly to be examined by doctors.  That’s a good sign in opposite world.  While in opposite world, you can pick up Lyle Overbay to be your first baseman.  He’s awesome!  Hopefully the doctors just need to prescribe some rest and cheese steak soup for Howard.

A.J. Burnett – 4 2/3 IP, 8 ER, 10 baserunners, 4 Ks.  This might be news like, “and water is wet,” but Burnett’s unownable.

Nick Swisher – 2-for-5 and 2 homers.  He makes me almost want to add sideburns to my facial hair accoutrements.

While the merits of what someone is hitting or not hitting in Spring Training can be debated, where they are hitting or not hitting is important to look at.  First, I want you to refresh your pretty little brain with the impact of lineup position on Runs and RBIs.  Welcome back!  Anyway, here’s some players whose value dips or shoots up (easy, Hamilton) due to 2010 lineup position:

Alexei Ramirez – He tends to start the season slow and he’s slated to bat ninth.  That’s a recipe for yawnstipation.

Ben Zobrist - Here’s what I said about Zobrist in the 2010 fantasy baseball rankings, “Zobrist’s homers don’t seem as fluky as they might appear.  He maintained a 17.5 HR/FB in 2009 and a 17.4 HR/FB in 2008.  Granted, that was a smaller sample size.  So he may look like David Eckstein, but the only thing they have in common is neither is Jewish though their names sound like they are.  Zobrist’s average seems out there; he looks closer to a .270 hitter.  He was a utility man coming into 2009 and I wouldn’t be surprised if he left 2010 back in that role.”  And that’s me quoting me!  Well, I could be wrong.  Zobrist will be hitting third for the Rays.  The doubts I had about Zobrist coming into this season are a bit assuaged by this lineup position.  I still don’t think Zobrist hitting third will last the whole year, but who goes from hitting third at the start of the year to the bench?  Oh, wait…

Casey Kotchman – Should hit third against righties.  Look at Casey making a play for fantasy value!  Unfortunately, he probably won’t play against lefties with Garko stealing ABs.  If you can somehow work a platoon of Kotchman into your fantasy lineup (I’m thinking mostly AL-Only leagues), Casey could be a steal.  Damn, every time I say I’m done with a player, they pull me back in.  So who’s hitting third vs. lefties? Glad you asked, random italicized voice.

Franklin Gutierrez – Will hit third vs. lefties.  Though The Big FraGu is slotted into the 7 hole vs. righties, hitting in front of the catcher and Jack Wilson.  On the bright side, this is contingent on the health of Bradley and Griffey Jr., who’s now older than Griffey Sr. from when you remember him.

Jose Bautista – Hitting leadoff.  That could also be the answer to, “Where did all of Aaron Hill’s RBIs go?”

Travis Snider – Currently stuck between John Buck and Alex Gonzalez.  That’s like the middle seat between Afa and Sika.

Gaby Sanchez – This could change, but right now he looks like he’s stuck in the eight hole.  Luckily, no one’s actually drafted him anywhere, except for me.  Yay me.

Shane Victorino – This move has been covered by me numerous times before, but, yeah, he’s in the 7 hole and Crapolanco is appropriately enough in the two hole.

Ian Desmond – Batting 2nd.  “Mr. Desmond, roses just arrived from you.”  “Who are they from?”  “Grey from Razzball.”  “Put them in the pile with the chocolates he sent yesterday.”

Marlon Byrd – The five hole.  He’s going to prove to be so borderline mixed league worthy, I have a feeling there will be at least 1700 comments this year asking me if they should drop (Insert Schmohawk) and pick up Byrd.

Orlando Cabrera – O-Cab’s in the two hole.  He’ll probably be more valuable than most middle infielders that are owned more than him, but what freakin’ fun is it owning Orlando Cabrera?

Jay Bruce – Until Rolen gets injured, Bruce is in the 6 hole.  Bruce could be this year’s Kemp in regards to a losing value from lineup position.

Julio Borbon – Will be hitting on top of a very potent lineup.  Borbon will have to really struggle to not have a huge year.

Elvis Andrus – He has not left the building, but he has parked in the nine hole.

Albert Callaspo – Hitting third.  For all of you crazy excited about Butler this year.  He’s hitting in this lineup:  DeJesus, Podsednik, Callaspo, Butler, Ankiel, Guillen, Betancourt, Kendall and Getz.  There’s about eight names there that wouldn’t make the starting lineup for any other team.  Fun times!

Magglio Ordonez – I really don’t think he’s ownable anywhere, but he’s set to bat third.  I could probably knock in 90 and score 90 in the three hole of a major league lineup.

Scott Sizemore – Will be allowed to ferment in the 8 hole as he proves his mettle for a month or two.  I have a feeling that I might be jumping off the Scott Sizemore bandwagon sooner vs. later.  We shall see.

Erick Aybar – Leading off for the Angels. Will get Runs, some steals and average, poor homers and RBIs.  His stats are like looking at Yunel’s in the mirror.  I will call you, lenuY.

Garrett Jones – Will bat third.  If you can have a fantasy lineup of mostly three hole hitters, you’re at least pointing in the right direction.

Colby Rasmus – Batting in front of Pujols.  A 2001 Bonds would get pitches to hit in front of Pujols.

Carlos Gonzalez and Dexter Fowler – Top of the Rockies order.  That’s rated 3 M for Mmm…

Everth Cabrera – At some point, I hope the Padres make the right decision and put EverCab at the top of the order, but I don’t think it’s happening out of the gate.

Pablo Sandoval – Hitting third behind Rowand and Renteria, which sounds like a VD clinic.

Nick Johnson – Hitting 2nd for the Yankees.  Johnson has a .400+ career OBP.  Last I checked the Yankees scored a lot of runs.  Anyone want any action on the over/under for the amount of times Johnson’s on second and gets held at 3rd on a single?  65? 70?

Nolan Reimold – I’m not even sure he’s in the lineup.  Trembley’s talking about starting Pie.  How dare you judge, Reimold!  Doode, your team’s going nowhere fast — play Reimold!  Sorry, this has nothing to do with this post.  But I thought some of you might not have heard and I didn’t want to do a whole post on this, though I did have the title, Effin’ Pie.

Alcides Escobar – Batting at the bottom of the lineup for right now, but Weeks is one aggressive burp away from the DL.

Orlando Hudson to the Twins.  Anyone ever wonder about how Disneyland and Disney World are both in an Orange County in two different states?  Weird, right?  Yeah, deep thoughts with Grey Albright.  So Orlando Hudson goes to the Twins and retains the same value he’s had with every other team.  You can set your watch to “Blah” and Hudson will get there every time.  He’s around the same value as Crapolanco.  He’ll slide into the two hole in the lineup and slash around 85/10/65/.290/10.  As they say, a better real baseball move.  And by “they,” I mean whoever says that.  The best part of signing Hudson is that Twins fans can say see-ya to Casilla as a starter at 2B and punt Punto to under 200 plate appearances.  Anyway, here’s some more signings and goings-on for 2010 fantasy baseball:

Orlando Cabrera — To the Reds.  Orlando Cabrera is slightly more exciting than Hudson, but really it couldn’t have been more yawnstipating.  O-Cab brings a bit more speed potential with a slightly lower average.  Think 80/10/75/.275/15.  Not a bad name to look at late at MI, but you’ll definitely grow bored of him sometime in April.

Erik Bedard – Resigns with the M’s.  Solid for about three months of the six month season.  Unfortunately, no one has any idea when those three months will come.

Kevin Gregg – Signed on with the Blue Jays.  <sarcasm>When your team will battle for last place in the toughest division and you have guys that are capable of being the closer, why not sign a mediocre closer?</sarcasm> I imagine this signing is like what my friend we call, Cheap Bastard, does.  (You know, Fat Bastard.  Well, my friend’s cheap.)  He doesn’t really need a six gallons of chicken broth from Costco, but it’s on sale.  Everyone’s got a friend like this, or you are this person.  I figure the Jays will just trade Gregg away at the trading deadline.  Gregg’s not a terrible closer like his rap sheet may indicate.  He was a bit unlucky last year with homers allowed.  He was an unnecessary purchase for the Jays, but he’s no worse than most eh closers.  Around a 4 ERA, around a 1.30 WHIP and decent Ks — about 8 K/9, which puts him in the 60 K range on the year.  If he’s getting saves, he’s worth owning.  SAGNOF!  I think he will be the closer for at least the first part of the year.

Ryan Garko – Signed with the Mariners.  Again, another better in real baseball type move.  He’ll hurt Casey Kotchman’s playing time, but, as we all know, Kotchman was hurting his own playing time.

Adam Kennedy – Signs with the Nats and soils my Ian Desmond sleeper post.  Jim Riggleman said Ian Desmond could play all three outfield positions, shortstop and second base.  Not an ideal situation.  Will have to see what playing time is like for Desmond now.  If he can get 400 ABs, he’ll still have value, just not nearly as much.  I haven’t had such harsh feelings for a Kennedy since the early 90′s VJ.