It’s trade deadline time, a full baseball weekend, and Grey is at a crawfish festival asking ladies whether he has any chum in his moustache. Anyway, the Indians spoiled the Yanks and Sawx plans by nabbing Ubaldo for a bunch of prospects including their top two pitching prospects (Drew Pomeranz and Alex White).
Please, blog, may I have some more?Orlando Cabrera
Orlando Cabrera taxied into Cleveland yesterday. Does Cleveland’s middle infield of Orlando and Asdrubal remind anyone else of an embarrassing moment at Epcot that I blamed on a 5-year-old? Probably just me. Hopefully not too many mixed leaguers are doing handstands over this news. Orlando Cabrera is good for 7-10 homers and 7-10 steals and by “good” I mean bad and not bad as in good. Too bad Cabrera’s first name doesn’t start with an S, then he can be S-Cab. Anyway, here’s some other fantasy baseball news:
Scott Podsednik – Signed with the Blue Jays. Don’t the Jays already have Podsednik but call him Rajai Davis? Perplexing news to say the least, though saying the least wouldn’t have me saying anything. Maybe the Jays signed Podsednik because his wife keeps morale up around the clubhouse. Wokka, wokka, wokka. Right now, Podsednik will work as a fourth outfielder and will probably see around 400 ABs. I’m not too concerned about Davis, Snider or Juan Rivera’s playing times. They all need a rest once in a while and Rivera can’t stay healthy.
Please, blog, may I have some more?You know that slo-mo video of Homer Simpson taking a cannonball off his belly? This looked more painful. When Carlos Santana, the future of the Indians franchise, went down in this collision, his knee said, “I wish I were Joe Theismann’s knee.” To stay in the world of The Simpsons, you can see the exact moment when Cleveland’s heart breaks. Carlos Santana’s collision was like The Decision, Part II. Only more ghoulish. I’d be shocked if Santana’s back this year. Hopefully, he’ll be fine for next year. On the bright side, Cleveland, you’re still not Detroit. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Shelley Duncan – 4-for-5, 1 Run, 2 RBIs. Surprised there weren’t any other injuries reported from Shelley Duncan high fives. He’s always so intense. Here’s him taking questions after the game.
Please, blog, may I have some more?While the merits of what someone is hitting or not hitting in Spring Training can be debated, where they are hitting or not hitting is important to look at. First, I want you to refresh your pretty little brain with the impact of lineup position on Runs and RBIs. Welcome back! Anyway, here’s some players whose value dips or shoots up (easy, Hamilton) due to 2010 lineup position:
Alexei Ramirez – He tends to start the season slow and he’s slated to bat ninth. That’s a recipe for yawnstipation.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Orlando Hudson to the Twins. Anyone ever wonder about how Disneyland and Disney World are both in an Orange County in two different states? Weird, right? Yeah, deep thoughts with Grey Albright. So Orlando Hudson goes to the Twins and retains the same value he’s had with every other team. You can set your watch to “Blah” and Hudson will get there every time. He’s around the same value as Crapolanco. He’ll slide into the two hole in the lineup and slash around 85/10/65/.290/10. As they say, a better real baseball move. And by “they,” I mean whoever says that. The best part of signing Hudson is that Twins fans can say see-ya to Casilla as a starter at 2B and punt Punto to under 200 plate appearances. Anyway, here’s some more signings and goings-on for 2010 fantasy baseball:
Orlando Cabrera — To the Reds. Orlando Cabrera is slightly more exciting than Hudson, but really it couldn’t have been more yawnstipating. O-Cab brings a bit more speed potential with a slightly lower average. Think 80/10/75/.275/15. Not a bad name to look at late at MI, but you’ll definitely grow bored of him sometime in April.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Top twenty catchers, 1st basemen and 2nd basemen are in the books. Third basemen will be here shortly. Today, it’s the top 20 Shortstops for 2009 Fantasy Baseball’s time to shine. Hmm… Actually, most of these won’t shine. They’re dull with a chance of boring. As I said in the beginning of the year, the shortstops are even shallower than the 2nd basemen. This held true. A good two weeks in the major leagues and you too can make the top twenty list for shortstops! Okay, enough of the hubbub on the tomfoolery. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2009 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Chris Carpenter went five innings giving up no runs, allowing 4 baserunners, adding in 6 Ks, driving in 6 runs and five golden… rings. 12 runs for the Cards, but everyone was a ticker tease, except for Carpenter who pitchslapped Kip Wells. LaRussa’s mind must be swimming with ideas….Do I hit him 8th? 7th? Do I platoon him with Ankiel in the OF and have Ankiel come in for intentional walks? Do I go with a Singapore Sling or an Old Fashioned? Why is Dave Duncan looking at me? Is my fly open? How come no one read my book, Tonyball? If I’m facing East, my hair should be facing West! Why is it going South?! If homeless people have no homes, why do they lug around so much junk? Homeless people shouldn’t be pack rats!… Wow, there’s a lot swimming in Tony’s mind. Interesting to peek into the mind of a genius, ain’t it? Surprised he didn’t mention this is the last roundup of the year. Ho-hum, so sad. There will still be a new post every week day through the fall and winter, so check your separation anxiety at the door. I’m still here. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Scott Baker – 5 IP, 0 ER. His FIP last year was 3.79. This year it was near 4. So he was .20 off of last year. He throws around 7 Ks per 9 innings. So he’s good for about 155 Ks. His Post-All-Star Break ERA was 3.39. Guess what I’m saying is I’m going to predict next year he’ll pitch around a 3.75 ERA, good WHIP and solid Ks and he’ll be someone to look at as a third fantasy starter with number two upside and number four downside. And in three months, I’ll quote that.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Zack Greinke won his 16th game yesterday pretty much the same way he won his other 15. In September, he has a .35 ERA. That’s two earned runs through 26 innings. Okay, recent-history lesson aside. The question I’ve been thinking on a lot lately is where will he be drafted next year. I think it’s fair to assume he’s moved in front of Johan and Sabathia. Webb and Peavy hit speedbumps this year and Halladay’s been his usual dominating self, but he never seems to get the fantasy love. I mean, Halladay was better than everyone last year but wasn’t drafted in front of them this year either. So that leaves Greinke and Lincecum. Lincecum’s proven; he’s a top 2nd round pick. So is Greinke a 2nd to 3rd rounder? On one hand, it seems implausible to me that Greinke’s going to go that early (this might be because I don’t draft pitchers that early). On the other hand, he’s earned it. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Psyche! Before we jump into the roundup, and, oh, we will be jumping, Rudy updated the master standings. With 114 points out of 120, Mowses is parting the rest of you Razzballers with his cane and giant beard. Unfortunately, he has no shot at 120 points. Damn. We hoped with 9 leagues that one would get 120. How many leagues do we need to have to foster a perfect season? We feel like Mr.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Corey Hart is out for up to a month with an appendectomy. My college roommate had an appendectomy and he returned from the hospital in 24 hours and back to drinking Olde E forties with me by Friday, which is what we called Tuesday. Bill Hall will be recalled (Score one for NL pitchers) and Frank Catalanotto will see time in right field (score one for the Catalanottos). Good thing the Brewers traded for Gerut. Who? Hey, you sound like Ken Macha! I expect the Hart will go on in September. If he gives you his biggest month of the season then, it’ll be about 4 homers and 4 steals for the month. Whoopie! If Hart’s still on your team, now’s as good a time as any to cut him, unless you have DL room. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Ian Kinsler – Just hit the DL. Usually he doesn’t turn into a pumpkin for another twenty games. Kinsler was in Friday’s Buy/Sell. Betcha can guess which side of the slash he fell on.
Please, blog, may I have some more?George Sherrill was traded from the Orioles to the Dodgers. Sherrill will backup Broxton. If you play in a league with Holds, by all means. If you don’t, you can lose him. Okay, that’s that. Now for the interesting part, who closes for the Orioles? Personally, I think it’s going to be Jim Johnson. I said him in last week’s Buy/Sell and he’s the same name I’m saying now. Johnson’s been owning the 8th inning setup duties for a while now, though he’s also given up runs in 3 of his last 4 appearances. So who else could it be? Could it be Baez? The answer my friend is blowing in the wind… Danys Baez was a donkey-corn back in 2005 for the Rays, collecting 41 Saves and posting a 2.86 ERA. So he’s capable, but the Orioles seem likely to give Johnson the first shot. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Brandon Webb – Suffered a setback.
Please, blog, may I have some more?

