I wish I was a mathematician or at least had one of those rad looking calculator watches. For now I will remain myself and take random, yet seasoned guesses at this thing that we covet so much, the save. It’s the only position that every person garnering save capability is owned in every league no matter how big or small, which makes it fun. They say all the fun is the chase, I guess that’s why I am bored with so many people tied up in my Gam-Gam’s basement. Digression, segue, punctuation. The Royals, or for better reference, Greg Holland, has figured out his mojo, while all of us hoping for a heated up Kelvin to pounce are reduced to wait for a Holland-days off. I am glad that Holland has shown what we all thought he could be, albeit for one glorious day. Two in a row is a winning streak, so said Lou Brown. So onto the rankings of closers and some of their ‘cuffs. This week’s random weird but true factoid, the Phillies are 13 games into the season and do not have a hold by any pitcher on their team. Put that in your cheese steak and smoke itPlease, blog, may I have some more?
The night was… humid. In the hospital hallway, Guillen was calling doctors, nurses and a janitor putas. I was by his bedside early in the day. We talked for a long time before he went under the knife. Talked about life, name changing and fantasy baseball.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Straight from Rudy’s risky pitcher post, “Sliders are the most effective pitch one can throw but are worse on the arm than fastballs/changeups. Pitchers who rely on sliders (15+% of pitchers) take this risk if they feel it’s the only way to reach their expected level of success. Young pitchers relying heavily on sliders for success are more akin to a kid on his tippy-toes trying to make it on a ride – they can only keep it up so much before they fall below that line or get hurt trying.” Following that line of thought, Brandon Morrow was thrown from the big boy ride and will start the season on the DL because he threw sliders with reckless a-Brandon. The Jays are going to backdate Morrow’s DL stint so he’ll only miss one start. Yeah, and I’d like to backdate my fantasy draft where I took Morrow, but that ain’t happening either. If Morrow only misses one start all year, call me Mr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
A Spanish woman, dressed in black, just pedaled past my house, chanting, “Luis Castillo no es Manny Trillo…Luis Castillo no es Manny Trillo…Luis Castillo… Oh shoot, I ripped my stockings!” It was totally sad. Kinda like when your best buddy, let’s call him Chase Utley, gets old man knee and the Phillies replace him with Luis Castillo. Luis Castillo would be good for my pre-All-Star Game contest where him and Juan Pierre have a home run contest and the gopher ball-happy Rodrigo Lopez is pitching. Just think of how few back’s we’d have to hear from Berman. There’s nothing as far as fantasy goes with Castillo. Even if objects appear closer in the side view, you still can’t see Castillo’s best days. To give you an idea of how terrible he is, the Mets released him. Long story short, he’s useless in any league where there are other starting 2Bs available. This Castillo signing does spell further doom for Utley. You really can’t draft him at this point. Also, my giant ostrich head has been in the sand too long with Howard. No Utley hurts him. I’m dropping him eight spots in the 2011 fantasy baseball rankings to right behind A-Rod. I would still draft him, but you can’t expect 115 RBIs or 95 runs at this point. Well, you can, but people might start to worry about you. Anyway, here’s some more news in fantasy baseball:
Johnny Cueto – Will miss 10 days or more with shoulder inflammation. Looks like Jason LaRue’s voodoo doll is finally working. This sounds like Cueto is going to miss at least a few weeks of the season. Obviously, not a great sign, but before we take Cueto to the mattresses for getting injured we should tempurpedic our concern. It’s a long season and he had a 5+ ERA last April and you still drafted him this year. He gets better in the heat, just DL him once the Reds do.Please, blog, may I have some more?
This week is bloated with guys who are most likely owned in your league. Or guys that should be owned. Though maybe not in ESPN abandoned leagues. ESPN owners, raise your hand if you’re not here. Guess they’re not here either.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Evan Longoria went 0-for-4 yesterday. He’s been kinda terrible for about three months now. Man, third base is a minefield. Now I’m not putting Longoria in the Wright Sucks Then Gets Conked On The Head box. No, he hasn’t been nearly that bad. But two separate months of an under .240 average and two months of zero steals and tw0 months of 1 steal and this sentence has nearly as many ands as, “In the saying, “Fish-and-Chips,” it’s necessary to have a hyphen between “fish” and “and,” and “and” and “chips.” I’m not ready to proclaim where Longoria should be drafted next year. I’m Grey and I make proclamations!Please, blog, may I have some more?
With Wakefield headed to the DL with a bad back (can’t he throw his knuckleball while sitting down?), Clay Buchholz will step into the Sawx rotation. In 99 innings of Triple-A, Buchholz had a line of 2.36/.98 and 89 Ks. His walks were down this year in the minors, though he did walk 3 in his only major league start this year vs.Please, blog, may I have some more?
On July 16th, Padres GM, Kevin Towers, said there’s a 50-50 chance that Jake Peavy would pitch again. Turned out there was a 50-50 chance that he was lying. On July 16th, Peavy’s boot came off and his ankle is healthy. Peavy now says he’ll pitch again this year. Oh, okay. Peavy is the Padres ace, i.e., they’re not going to mess with bringing him back to make sure they win 60 games instead of 58.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Much like a newly married female, the Blue Jays have dropped BJ from the active roster. Imagine this scenario. You walk into your fro-yo distribution job, say what’s up to your TCBY manager who’s twelve years younger than you, open up the jimmies container and proceed to flip them, one at a time, at your manager’s head. Timothy asks you politely to stop. You politely give him a wedgie. Naturally, he fires you. Then you collect your salary for the next year. Man, the life of a terrible baseball player may be better than the life of a marginal one who has to play every day. B.J.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Carlos Zambrano in his own special way welcomed the Cubs new arrival, Jake Fox, with a shizzfit of epic proportions. Zambrano was ejected for bumping an ump, I especially enjoyed when the ump ejected him and he then ejected the ump. I’m out of order?Please, blog, may I have some more?