I don’t do 1st baseman sleepers because there are none.  Okay, I love A.J. Reed like he’s Neve Campbell and Denise Richards and I’m Matt Dillion, but Reed’s a flyer at this point.  If you’re drafting a 1st baseman sleeper, you’re losing your league.  Who are you putting at 1st?   Yonder Alonso?  That’s cool.  Don’t pay your league fees until the end of the year and then duck out of the country.  You feel me?  Okay, stop feeling me, that shizz wasn’t meant literally.  3rd basemen are more or less in the same boat, and that boat is the Titanic and if you draft a sleeper 3rd baseman that doesn’t pan out, you’re gonna sink while holding until to a lady named Rose who gets real old looking, but some of youse have corner men in your league, so we may as well look at a few 3rd basemen for s’s and g’s.  Good?  Good.  These are all 3rd basemen that being drafted after 200 overall.  Keep in mind, nephew (and five niece readers), your Uncle Grey likes to have a corner man drafted by the time these guys appear, so you’re looking at potential utility men more than anything.  Now, this is a (legal-in-all-countries-except-Indonesia) supplement to the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball.  Click on the player’s name where applicable to read more and see their 2016 projections.  Anyway, here’s some 3rd basemen to target for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Welcome to the 2016 Razzball Team Previews! You’ll find everything you need to know about each team to get yourself ready for the upcoming fantasy baseball season. And I mean everything, folks. We’ve got line-ups, charts, Slurpees, lube, a guide for beginner electricians, and even a cactus! Well, that’s a lie. That’s what Jay had last year sitting in front of him. This year? Um…a little less lube? Take that as you will. But hey, we’ve got teams to preview and questions to ask, so let’s hop to it. We a very special guest for this post… Rob Rogacki, to provide his take on what the team has in store this season. Now enough rambling, let’s see what 2016 holds for the Detroit Tigers!

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3rd basemen are the new Dolly Parton.  They are so top heavy they haven’t seen their toes in years.  After the top ten 3rd basemen, the rest are a wing, a prayer and Winger doing a cover of Living on a Prayer, which can’t hold a candle to Bon Jovi, because A) Jersey B) No one can hold a candle to Bon Jovi because of Jersey. C) There’s no C.  D)  Jersey!  I can’t remember a position like this for any other year in recent memory, but I’ve killed my brain for years with hard drugs.  If you don’t have a 3rd baseman by the 100th overall pick, you might be kissing your 3rd baseman position goodbye.  Literally, smooching your computer monitor like you’re in that Spike Jonze movie with Scarlett Johansson robot-talking.  By the way, Johansson is 31 years old, in nine years, she’s gonna be old.  In nine years, I’m gonna be distinguished.  Damn, Hollywood, you’re messed up giving me these ageist ideas!  As always, my projections and tiers are noted.   Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2016 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I went looking around The Google Machine for Nick Castellanos articles and they go like this starting in 2013 to present (I’m paraphrasing):  “Is High-Flying Prospect, Castellanos, The Next George Brett?”  “Can Castellanos Be Better Than Miggy?”  “Castellanos Hopes To Bounce Back After His Lackluster Rookie Season?”  “One Bad Year Behind Him, But He’s Still Young.”  “Castellanos Puts Second Poor Year To Bed, Will His Bat Ever Awaken?”  “Castellanos Is A Platoon Player, Face It.”  “Castellanos Shows Bat Is Ready For Prime Time….Prime Time In India Where CSI: Mumbai Is A Ratings Disaster.”  “Castellanos Is Greek For Can’t Stand Yous.”  “Castellanos Finally Shows Glimmer, Is It Too Late?”  “Castellanos Surprisingly Not Related To Nia Vardalos, Still Ugly If You Look At Him Too Long.”  There ya go, that pretty much tracks the career of Castellanos up until now through article titles.  In Triple-A in 2012, Castellanos had all the makings of a hot prospect at the age of 21.  Now, he’s 23 and it feels like that’s in dog years.  So, where’s the optimism, is it that I can’t let a top prospect go?  No, and I take offense to that.  I let Jay Bruce go…after six seasons.  Anyway, what can we expect from Nick Castellanos for 2016 fantasy baseball and what makes him a sleeper?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Rich Hill pitched a complete game two-hit shutout last night against the Mighty Orioles walking just one batter and striking out 10 for his second win. Where the heck was this guy in April when Justin Masterson and Steven Wright were starting? Am I really asking that question about a 35-year-old southpaw journeyman who hasn’t started a big league game since 2009, and was out of baseball in July? Yeah I guess I am asking that because Hill has been an absolute monster since debuting with the Sawx two weeks ago in Tampa Bay. In just three starts, he’s pitched 23.0 IP, allowing just 10 hits and 3 ER, with a 30/2 K/BB rate. Yes, my friends, the Hill Has Ks. That was almost your headline. Also, not for nothing, the three earned runs were surrendered to the Blue Jays, and I mean, come on, it’s the Blue Jays. And just in case you thought this story couldn’t get any sweeter, Rich was pitching for the Independent League’s Long Island Ducks just months ago. He holds a 1.70 ERA and 0.52 WHIP through three starts and although I love what he’s doing, he’s scheduled to take on the Yankees in New York next week and I wouldn’t call it a slam dunk. If you’re feeling lucky, by all means ride the snake, but I’m not sure I’d risk my fantasy season on Rich Hill, despite how awesome he’s been. But cool story, bro!

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

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So, I’m here today to talk about The Gregorius D.I.D.  Yo, tell me, who’s hot, who’s not, who still out on waivers?  Check out my mustache, I’m no shaver.  D-I-D P-O-P-P-A, no info from the ESPN.  Free agents mad cause I’m flagrant.  Call my cell and I’m in my mom’s basement.   My fantasy team supreme, stay clean in the offseason.  Bats in holsters, pitchers and their effin’ shoulders.  Playboy, I told ya, cause I talk to the centerfolds and they talk back to me.  Hanley bruise too much, I lose too much.  I guess it’s cause you run and come up lame too much.  Me lose my touch?  Never that!  If I did, ain’t no problem to pick up a bat.  Yo, waivers, where the true players at?  So, Didi Gregorious, BK’s finest, has been smoking hot for the past week and should be owned in every league.  In the last week, he’s hitting near .600 with three homers.  Will it continue?  There’s only three weeks left of the season, it doesn’t matter if it will continue.  It’s Cadbury Crunchie time, own players that are producing right now, honeycomb.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hashtag, oh em gee.   Hashtag, my hashtag is an honors student.  Hashtag, back again, check it to wreck it, let’s begin.  Corey Seager was called up.  I just got goosepimplies on the butterflies that are in my stomach.  I just can’t.  *puts handkerchief to forehead, falls back and Giancarlo catches me, wakes to Giancarlo holding me, faints again and every time I reawaken and see Giancarlo, I faint once more*  I just had a fainting fit thinking about Seager.  Okay, now that we got the histrionics out of our systems.  What’s the best Seager does this year?  A few homers, a few steals and marries your sister?  What’s the worst?  Nothing.  Of course, I’d pick him up in all leagues.  I’m not goddamn goofy.  I just wouldn’t hold out hope that he’s going to do anything that incredible this year.  For the very short-term, Seager will fill in for Jose Peraza who is out with a sore hamstring.   Yesterday, Seager hit eighth going 2-for-4 with 2 runs, 2 RBIs.  When Peraza returns, Seager will play a few games a week, and maybe hint at the insane ability he possess, but saving the bulk of his wonderful until next year.  Remember, Mike Trout did nothing in his first trip through the majors.  Clayton Kershaw looked awful in his first trip through the majors.  Right now, Buxton looks awful, and he will be great.  Seager can go 5-for-35 with 20 Ks in September and it means nothing.  Sorry to sober up your rookie nookie.  You were wet-kissing your fantasy team and it was weird.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Don’t worry, I’m not going to talk about U2. I already go over boring hitters below. Seriously, they are one of the most overrated bands ever. They are like the 80’s and 90’s version of the Eagles. The closest they get to my iPOD is this song. This week we are going in a different direction than before, because I killed the Top 100. After receiving Grey’s blessing (thanks bossman!), here’s what’s going to happen: After going through the evolution of ranking players this season, it became clear to me that it wasn’t working. By June 1st, you know what you have and it’s generally a good point to start making trades to address needs. As the season goes forward, those needs get increasingly particular until you get to this point. After some discussions with Mike, Sky and Big Magoo, I got some good input and a really confusing emoji text conversation with Sky. Still not sure if we cool, but I got my Japanese friend coming over later to translate. This week, I have a Top 50 Hitters and a few sub lists for you to check out. Every week, it’s my plan to mix a few different sub lists in to help cover all bases… pun point!  I have included Steamers, ROS, HR/SB, projections, the ROS player rater, dollar values, and my own HR/SB projections. Don’t worry if you don’t see someone here, they are probably going to appear in another list next week or thereafter. Some people may even appear on multiple lists. You never know? Any questions? Good moving on…

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Let’s start on Jose Berrios with what Prospect Mike said, “Berrios has a great starter’s arsenal with a plus fastball (sits mid-90s) and a plus curveball coupled with an above average slider and changeup.  The ceiling is a #3 starter with good ratios and decent strikeout totals.  Most reports rave about his maturity and ability to make adjustments, which could give him a better shot at making it in a big league rotation.  Imagine a scale of good and evil with Maikel Franco on the good side and that Albright fella on the evil side, Berrios is more on the Franco side.”  Why am I a part of this example?  If I could quickly evaluate the Twins current crop of starters that are prospblocking Berrios:  Garbage, More Garbage, Utter Garbage, Shirley Manson in Garbage, Magic Garbage.  (Magic Garbage is Utah garbage where you find soiled magic underpants.)  I haven’t even started talking about how Berrios was bred in a lab in Knott’s Berry Farm by founder of the boysenberry, Rudolph Boysen, whose grandchild killed his parents and is currently behind bars (true story; yes, you’re dropping the ball, Dateline, by not featuring this).  The only thing that’s been stopping me from adding Berrios in every league is I have no idea when he’ll be called up.  I would add him now to see if he’s called up when rosters expand on September 1st, then drop him soon after in redraft leagues if he’s not called up.  Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

*swirls a glass, takes a gulp. spits it back in a bucket*  “That’s vintage Justin Verlander,” said Kate Upton.  “Okay, this might sound gross, but can you spit into my mouth?”  That’s you getting up the nerve to say something to Kate Upton.  I just thought of a moneymaking idea for Shark Tank!  You stand outside of Comerica Park with a cardboard cutout of a naked Verlander and have people pay $10 to take a picture with him, pretending to be Kate Upton.  Oh, and no, this post isn’t an attempt to Bleacher Report up Google’s rankings by mentioning Verlander and Upton repeatedly, though it does seem that way…Verlander/Upton, Verlander/Upton and Verlander/Upten for the illiterates.  So, Verlander did look magnificent yesterday until the 8th inning when he began to tire, ending up with a one hitter –> 9 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners (1 Hit), 9 Ks with an ERA at 3.45.  Big Magoo captured Verlander’s upside about two weeks ago with this post.  Worth reading, but the key part (cause I know, y’all can only read so much), “Since the All-Star break, Verlander’s 7.25 K/BB ratio is the 5th highest among qualified starting pitchers, and his 1.1 BB/9 is the 6th lowest.  He shares the same swinging strike rate (12.1%) as Jake Arrieta and Gerrit Cole over that span as well.  Now, excuse me as I go drain the weasel on a picture of Grey.”  Hey, wait a minute!  I didn’t remember that last part.  So, if Verlander is out there in your league, the one-hitter yesterday doesn’t seem to be a hirame.  Sorry, I just had sushi.  It’s not a fluke.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?