Big changes since last week kibitzed away and lot’s of rankings went up and down. The regions in the south seem to be upping the border patrol in regards to the save situation, as both Texas and Arizona are forming committees. For this week, I would rather focus on the desert instead of the burbs of Arlington. So with the demotion of Addison Reed and a full on committee type approach, I am throwing my sombrero on Enrique Burgos to stay, maintain, and hold the job. I have touted him on two previous occasions as the “next gunslinger to be” down there, and well, guess what? He’s here… sorta. Until Chip Hale realizes that he has a 60’s sitcom name and gets his head out of the Archie comics, we may be stuck withe the veteran preference type thing. We shouldn’t be, but most likely will be. We have seen what Zig-Zag has done and Reed? Well, he’s cooked in my eyes. Enrique is the goods. He is the typical high 90’s fastball having nonsense closer that you want. His minor league numbers suggest a high K rate, an occasional propensity to give up a walk, but he is young and sealing his oats. Be semi-patient, he has 18 total innings above A-ball. So far in the majors, he has 20 k’s in 11 plus innings. That is pretty nasty.Please, blog, may I have some more?
What an eventful SAGNOF (Saves Ain’t Got No Face) week it was. Shawn Tolleson, who was originally a high priority SAGNOF Special recommendation two weeks ago, now looks to be in a position to steal some saves from Neftali Feliz or possibly take the job outright. Feliz is in serious trouble and it will probably be either Shawn Tolleson or Keone Kela that takes over if Feliz is in fact removed. Right now the word is that Rangers manager Jeff Bannister is going to use whoever he fancies on any particular day to close out games and that leaves the door open for just about anyone, including Feliz. I find it hard to believe that anyone other than Tolleson is capable of running away with the closer role so he’s my heavy favorite. If I’m wrong, call me bad names, but try to make it funny at least.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I was going to say Shelby Miller looks sensational, but then I Googled sensational to see its definition, even though I know it already. (Al Gore did originally invent the internet as a tool of procrastination.) So, the Oxford Dictionary defines sensational as: causing great public interest and excitement, example “a sensational murder trial.” Wow, even the Oxford Dictionary is trying to get in on the tabloid journalism of our day. Hey, Oxford, why not, “Kim Kardashian’s booty was sensational when she broke the internet that Al Gore had created and now needed to fix.” That gives me a great idea, a mash up of the Urban and Oxford Dictionary! Definition of a flake: A crazy or eccentric person. “Yo, that flake is three crumbs short of a Peek Frean.” Any the hoo! Shelby Miller did look sensational, murdering bats like The Riddler. Yesterday, he went 9 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 4 Ks to lower his ERA to 1.33. Is he this good? Oh, c’mon. But how bad is he? His K/9 is 7.2, BB/9 is 2.7 and xFIP is 3.79. His BABIP is .203, LOB% is 88.8% and his ground ball rate is 50.4%. Essentially, Miller’s a 3.25-3.60 ERA pitcher with decent, but not great Ks, solid but not terrific control, and one great pitch that he’s figured out how to use, the cutter. He could easily have a month-long spasm of a 5.00 ERA just as easily as he’s done six weeks of a 1.33 ERA. Would I sell him high? Yes, indeed. Or as the Urban-Oxford Dictionary would say, “Does a corgi crap under the Queen’s bed and she calls it a soon-to-be truffle?” Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
This week I’ve got two really ugly recommendations for those of you in need of stolen bases. The first player has been slumping badly, the second is Public Enemy No. 1 as far as some Rusney Castillo fans are concerned… Adam Eaton or considering how he’s (not) hitting lately, Adam “I haven’t Eaton in days”. Ok, he’s not exactly old yet and his 59/5/37/14/.264 ROS (Rest Of Season) Steamer projection (R/HR/RBI/SB/AVG) is actually quite good and is in fact better than the projections of some of the younger players I’ve recommended previously. Secondly, we have Shane Victorino aka Rusney Castillo’s wet blanket (well to be fair, Castillo’s inability to stay healthy has been his own wet blanket, but let’s not let the truth get in the way of a good story) who is back from injury. He might not be worth owning if he’s only going to start 4 times a week but if he’s starting 5-6 times a week, well, he’s better than a lot of other players out there. Before dismissing Eaton and Victorino keep in mind veterans Nori Aoki and Angel Pagan have fared pretty well this year. And let’s face it, I’m basically making recommendations here for your last roster spot. These are all players that are fairly expendable, that’s why they are out there in so many leagues.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Imagine a world without Greg Holland. Okay, got it… because it’s here… sorta. There would be no tulip or windmill jokes and Wade Davis would basically be the freaking mac. I was interested to see what his numbers really were, since he basically became a full time reliever towards the end of the 2013 season, and up to this date thus far in the season. So over the 89 innings of relief work, he has allowed 42 hits, 9 ER, and K/BB rate of 124/28. I don’t curse very often, but holy sh*t. The best thing about him is that he doesn’t have to be all-pressured to be the closer if he doesn’t want to. Kinda like the cool kids in school, they sometime bring books to class or they just punch a juke box and say words that word normally sound like a euphemism for IBS. I am by no means wishing Greg an injury-riddled year because, irregardless, Wade is going to do what he do. He is far and away the most important reliever in baseball, argue that if you want… you will lose, but it’s fun to argue. Enjoy the week’s closer updates and rankings…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dressed in a tuxedo, Ron Kittle walks up to Leon Durham, looking fabulous in a red dress and high heels, and says, “It would be my pleasure to give you a lesson in marksmanship.” Leon scoffs, “You couldn’t give me a lesson in long-distance spitting.” Then they begin to go back and forth, “Anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything, better than you.” “No, you can’t, Kris Bryant!” “Yes, I can, Carlos Rodon!” “No, you can’t, Kris Bryant!” “Yes, I can, Carlos Rodon!” “You four-eyed honkey, KRIS BRYANT!” “You four-eyed non-honkey, CARLOS RODON!” And so went the Annie Get Your Gun musical performed by the White Sox and Cubs alumni this weekend. Rodon is ready to perform, but why start his clock to pitch out of the bullpen? Unless the White Sox are sick of Noesi butting into their rotation where he doesn’t belong. I’d have to guess that’s what’s happening here. The White Sox are saying Rodon will work out of the bullpen, but within a week or two, he’ll be in the rotation. Why do we care? Because he can be the best pitching prospect call up of the season. Yes, he can! I’d own him in any league, but he’s likely gone. No, he can’t! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Welcome back to the most important Razzball Commenter Leagues post you will read all week. Okay, well, it’s the only one, but lets not split hairs. Speaking of splitting hairs, I really need a haircut and a beard trim. I look like a hippy. Which reminds me of a movie I watched the other day after another fantasy related bout of insomnia. Back in the 90’s, we had a lot of good low budget flicks to entertain us while we waited for the internet to get better. PCU was one of my favorites from this genre that still to this day holds up with its commentary on the ridiculousness of higher education, why you shouldn’t get high and go out in public and of course the concept of don’t be that guy. [Jay’s Note: Swingers is better.] Oh the good times we had on couches with cheap pizza and malt liquor. Now, you might be wondering what this movie has to do with the RCL’s and you are right in asking, so I’ll tell you. Nothing, I’m just distracting you because it’s still too early for the master standings. I’m sorry guys and four girl readers. We will have to wait until next week to premier the official standings. Until then, assume you are in first overall if you are in first place in your league. We cool? Alright then let’s move on…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Really closers…really? It took all of two whole days for the save-nami to wash away all people’s hope and dreams. Maybe this is the end of days, you know the one where Arnold starts crying? Yet he didn’t cry in Commando, and they kidnapped his daughter who happens to be a fantasy fave in Alyssa Milano. Strange, uncontrollable apocalyptic things… tears, only daughter kidnapped… killing people. Well, since every team basically has three games under their belts, is it too early to start analyzing the bullpen situations to date? It kinda is, the patterns aren’t there for me to read, as usage is the first indicator for anything. Second is chafing. So instead of looking at the Holds situations this week (which I will come back to next week, I promise), we will take a look at the situations that are boggling our minds and flooding our rosters with handcuffs and middle relief hopefuls. It’s not an ideal situation for fantasy rosterbating, because it locks up so many bench spots if you are in the ever evolving chase for savedom. So enjoy the snippets, with some of general perspective on the relief corps. And for giggles I have updated the closer ranks to reflect all the trades, injuries and demotions.
In case you’re sick of baseball already, come on over and join me for some Fantasy Premier league action, it so easy all you have to do is click a tab located at the top that says Soccer. Read and enjoy. It’s like a good book that you play with your feet.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The pieces are all set, and it’s like the beginning of checkers… Before you secretly cheat while your cousin isn’t looking, you should know that 28-of-the-30 teams have labeled a guy to be their respective closer. Now, for some, that’s like being labeled the “Hand of the King” and with bad pitching performances, their heads will soon be on a pike out side of Comerica. Yeah, that was a shot at you Joe Nathan, we are all whistling happy trails under our breath as you slowly ride of into the sunset Shane style.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Greetings! The time has come! This is what we’ve all been so patiently waiting for! Yaaaaaaasssss, Bruce Jenner’s sex change is upon us!!! Rejoice! It’s also a cool time of the year because MLB is starting up again. I suppose that means we should get down on some mo fantasy baseball type shizzz. Are you ready? No, I said, ARE YOUR READY!?!? Okay, sweet.
I so desperately wanted to write a preseason piece on Domonic Brown, but I was notified that he received over 500 words in my outfielders post, making it a no go this week. Can you even imagine? That would be like some moron pathetically green lighting a sequel to Paul Blart: Mall Cop. Only my Domonic column would probably go on to win awards and Blart 2 would be about as entertaining as watching Rosie O’Donnell’s love box fart for two straight hours…..WHAT?!?!?!?!? THEY’RE MAKING A PAUL BLART SEQUEL!??! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE!?!?!? My generation got Home Alone and Radio Flyer. The children of today get Paul effing Blart? Kevin James should be ashamed of himself for this. It’s embarrassing enough piggybacking the falling star that is Adam Sandler into 90% of his movie roles, but this is beyond pathetic. Hey, at least his untalented brother will get another meaningless role. Laaaaaawd, make it stop.
Enough about Blart. I’m here to talk about closers. I am Tehol Beddict, and this is Disgrace/Delight! Take Heed!Please, blog, may I have some more?