Fantasy Baseball Advice

In this month’s closer look, let’s discuss the value of middle relievers.  I’m a big Mr. B.  Depending on the team, I have various combinations of MRs.  On one team, I have C.J. Wilson still.  (Notched a Save and a Win in a doubleheader the other day — natch!)  On another team, I’m rocking Dan Meyer.  On another, Rafael Soriano.  Besides having a guy that could take over the closing duties, middle relievers help lower your starters’ ratios.  Mark DiFelice + James Shields = 7-4/3.01/1.15/74 or Jake Peavy, 5-5/3.67/1.13/84.  That’s right, the Frankenpitcher of Jark DiShields is beating the pure breed Jake Peavy.  So how’s dem apples?  Delicious!  Now in some cases, you just can’t hold a MR.  Whether you’re besieged by injuries, need to handcuff one of your closers or need a bench hitter, sometimes it’s just not feasible.  As much as I like MRs, they are invariably the first ones I drop on my teams when I need help somewhere else.  Luckily, there’s always one available on waivers.  If it’s not Jark DiShields, you can own Kiko Garzero or C.J. Wolfson.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.

1. Jonathan Broxton (+3) (Ronald Belisario, Cory Wade)
2. Francisco Rodriguez (+2) (J.J. Putz)
3. Joe Nathan (-2) (Matt Guerrier, Jose Mijares)
4. Jonathan Papelbon (-2) (Takashi Saito, Manny Delcarmen, Hideki Okajima)

Donkey-corns

Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes his the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkey-corns.

5. Heath Bell (+3) (Greg Burke, Edward Mujica, Luke Gregerson)
6. Bobby Jenks (-1) (Octavio Dotel, Matt Thornton, Scott Linebrink)
7. Mariano Rivera (Alfredo Aceves, Brian Bruney, Damaso Marte)
8. Francisco Cordero (+3) (David Weathers, Arthur Rhodes, Nick Masset)
9. Frank Francisco (C.J. Wilson)
10. Brad Lidge (-4) (Ryan Madson)
11. Brian Fuentes (+1) (Jose Arredondo, Scot Shields)
12. Ryan Franklin (+4) (Jason Motte, Chris Perez, Kyle McClellan)
13. Chad Qualls (-3) (Jon Rauch, Tony Pena, Clay Zavada)
14. Kevin Gregg (Carlos Marmol)
15. Brian Wilson (Jeremy Affeldt, Bob Howry)
16. Kerry Wood (-3) (Jensen Lewis, Rafael Perez, Rafael Betancourt)
17. Mike Gonzalez (Rafael Soriano)
18. Fernando Rodney (Joel Zumaya, Ryan Perry, Brandon Lyon)
19. Scott Downs (+7)  (B.J. Ryan, Jason Frasor)

Brain Freeze

I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Troy Percival– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Pena in the head with a pickoff throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.

20. Huston Street (+2) (Manny Corpas)
21. Trevor Hoffman (Carlos Villanueva, Todd Coffey, Mark DiFelice)
22. George Sherrill (+7) (Jim Johnson, Danys, Baez, Chris Ray)
23. Matt Capps (-3) (John Grabow, Jesse Chavez, Tyler Yates)
24. David Aardsma (Brandon Morrow, Miguel Batista, Chad Cordero)
25. Joakim Soria (+3) (Juan Cruz, Jamey Wright, Kyle Farnsworth)
26. Matt Lindstrom (-7) (Leo Nunez, Kiko Calero, Dan Meyer)
27. Andrew Bailey (Brad Ziegler, Michael Wuertz, Santiago Casilla)
28. LaTroy Hawkins (-3) (Jose Valverde)
29. Joel Hanrahan (+1) (Kip Wells, Julian Tavarez)
30. J.P. Wheelfourson (-7) (Randy Choate, The Amazing Rando, Randy Jackson)

In this month’s closer look, let’s discuss some closer trading strategy.  As I mentioned the other day, I traded Street and some other closer for Haren.  This might’ve put me at a disadvantage for saves.  Now you’re probably thinking what the eff?  This doode doesn’t even know who he traded or if it put his team at a disadvantage for saves.  Well, that’s the whole point.  Saves are the easiest commodity to acquire on waivers.  Just last month, 10 closers lost their jobs, even if just temporarily.  10 out of 30 closers.  So, frankly, I don’t care if I’m trading Qualls, Bell or schmohawk closer behind door number 3.  Are some of these guys more reliable than others?  Sure, but that doesn’t mean Jenks couldn’t have a meltdown tomorrow.  They’re just closers.  As for not knowing if I’m at a disadvantage, it’s real early and plenty more saves will come into the league.  Not that many more Harens are coming into the league.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.

1. Joe Nathan (Jesse Crain)
2. Jonathan Papelbon (Takashi Saito, Hideki Okajima)
3. Jonathan Broxton (+4) (Hong-Chih Kuo, Cory Wade)
4. Francisco Rodriguez (+1) (J.J. Putz)
5. Bobby Jenks (+3) (Octavio Dotel, Matt Thornton, Scott Linebrink)

Donkey-corns

Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes his the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkey-corns.

6. Brad Lidge (-2) (Ryan Madson)
7. Mariano Rivera (-2) (Jonathan Albaladejo, Brian Bruney, Damaso Marte)
8. Heath Bell (+3) (Mike Adams)
9. Frank Francisco (+5) (C.J. Wilson)
10. Chad Qualls (Jon Rauch, Tony Pena)
11. Francisco Cordero (+4) (David Weathers, Jared Burton)
12. Brian Fuentes (Jose Arredondo, Scot Shields)
13. Kerry Wood (-5) (Jensen Lewis, Rafael Perez, Rafael Betancourt)
14. Kevin Gregg (-1) (Carlos Marmol)
15. Brian Wilson (+4) (Jeremy Affeldt, Bob Howry)
16. Ryan Franklin (+9) (Chris Perez, Jason Motte, Kyle McClellan)
17. Mike Gonzalez (Rafael Soriano)
18. Fernando Rodney (+11) (Joel Zumaya, Ryan Perry, Brandon Lyon)
19. Matt Lindstrom (+2) (Leo Nunez, Scott Proctor)

Brain Freeze

I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Troy Percival– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Pena in the head with a pickoff throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.

20. Matt Capps (-5) (John Grabow)
21. Trevor Hoffman (+7) (Carlos Villanueva, Todd Coffey, David Riske)
22. Huston Street (Manny Corpas)
23. Troy Percival (Dan Wheeler, Grant Balfour)
24. Brandon Morrow (+3) (David Aardsma, Miguel Batista, Chad Cordero)
25. LaTroy Hawkins (-15) (Jose Valverde)
26. Scott Downs (B.J. Ryan, Jason Frasor)
27. Andrew Bailey (-9) (Brad Ziegler, Michael Wuertz, Santiago Casilla)
28. Juan Cruz (-11) (Joakim Soria, Jamey Wright, Kyle Farnsworth)
29. George Sherrill/Chris Ray/Jim Johnson (-1)
30. Kip Wells/Joel Hanrahan (-9) (Julian Tavarez, Saul Rivera, Natalie from The Facts of Life)

Who doesn’t love a good comeback story?  Mickey Rourke, Jamie Walters, Wilco’s Sky Blue Sky after a very hit or miss, A Ghost is Born…  Now there’s Edwin Jackson.  Last night, he pitched a gem. 7 2/3 IP, 1 ER with 89 pitches.  I love prospects that seem destined for greatness then fail. (see Alex Gordon Love™.  Don’t see Felix Pie Love™, Jeff Clement Love™ or Andy LaRoche Semi-Love™).  Edwin Jackson fits that post-hype prospect bill.  He was supposed to be so good for sooooo long. (Yes, five oh’s.) And he’s still only 25.  In deep leagues, I’m going to try him on for size.  If you need pitching, don’t wait until his next good start.  It may be too late.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Tim Lincecum – He was pulled after 78 pitches with Bochy showing more restraint in one start than he did all of last year.  Obviously, I don’t own him on any team, but if I did, I wouldn’t cash the bailout check. (<– Not sure what that means, but it’s timely!)  Last year, Lincecum only threw 84 pitches in four innings in his first game of the year and went on to win the Cy Young… Of course, there was an hour and fourteen minute delay between his first pitch and last pitch and he was coming in in relief.  Nevertheless!  Lincecum will be fine and, even if he’s not, you’re not trading away your prize pitcher right after yesterday’s performance.  Sit tight, paisan.

Travis Ishikawa – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs.  You don’t know anything about him?  That’s the way it’s meant to be.  I have secrets!

Jeff Suppan – I can’t believe Milwaukee’s opening day pitcher was rocked.  Oh…it’s Suppan.  I can’t believe the Milwaukee opening day pitcher was Suppan.

Mike Cameron – 2 steals.  Said after the game about the Giants, “They were really swinging the bats today.”  They were facing the Soup.

Kyle Farnsworth – Cost me a win for Meche and a loss for Buehrle in my Razzball league.  We need a Razzball glossary term for this.  Please advise.

Ryan Zimmerman – Started the year 1-for-9.  Way to come out swinging!… And missing.  I swear, if you disappoint me this year, we’re through.

Cameron Maybin – One steal and batted 2nd yesterday.  That’s so Maybin!

Emilio Bonifacio – 2-for-5, 2 RBIs and after the game he saved a turtle from a burning building.

Jorge Cantu – Another HR.  In other news, the Marlins are petitioning major league baseball to only face the Nats this year.

Scott Olsen – 3 IP, 8 ER.  Marlins finally figure out what those other teams were talking about.

Josh Johnson – 6 2/3, 0 ER, 8 Ks.  Tried to push as many people as I could into drafting Johnson.  Hope people listened.

Chris Young – 6 IP, 2 ER.  Why ignoring spring training stats is sometimes the best medicine.

Heath Bell – Notched his first save.  I hope he entered to Hell’s Bells.

Alex Gordon – HR yesterday.  If he could just hit 25 more with a respectable average, I’d be so happy.

Ubaldo Jimenez/Dan Haren – Was like Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton out in Chase Field.

Ian Stewart – Rockie players were supposedly upset Stewart got the start on Opening Day over Barmes.  I can’t even imagine how upset they were with that deer.

DeWayne Wise – 0-for-4, 3 Ks.  When asked about the decision to lead off with Wise, Ozzie said, “Without Juan Uribe, what choice do I have?”

Geovany Soto – Left with shoulder soreness.  Will be out until the weekend.  If something happens to Koyie Hill, Soto said he could play, so I don’t think it’s that bad.  Then again, Theriot took warm up pitches from Heilman in the 9th.  If only Ozzie was managing the North Siders…

James Shields – 5 1/3, 5 ER.  Couple of doinks, a couple of donks and Ortiz’s badonkadonk.  Not a great start, obviously, but you can’t sit Shields.  Take solace in that…. I take solace everywhere and it always finds it’s way home — oofa!

Josh Beckett – Red State Jeter put it together with a very solid opening day start — 7 IP, 1 ER, 10 Ks.

Trevor Cahill – 5 IP, 2 ER.  He looked much worse.  The A’s start guys that have no business being in the majors.  I tend to ignore them.

Jason Motte – Was deemed unable to go yesterday after pitching on Monday.  Translation:  Franklin’s getting some saves whether Motte’s effective or not.

Wandy Rodriguez – 6 IP, 1 ER. Get on the Wandwagon!

David Freese – Not playing again.  This time LaRussa opted for Joe Thurston.  In one hand, rookie with potential.  In the other hand, minor league journeyman.  Eh, just be happy LaRussa started Rasmus.

Colby Rasmus – 2-for-4 in MLB debut.  That’s it, LaRussa.  Now give him 400 more ABs.

Brandon Morrow – During Morrow’s collapse on Tuesday, the Mariners announcer said Batista was “sparkling (on Monday).”  I’m not even joking.  Batista put something in the Mariners drink when they weren’t looking!  This job is still Morrow’s, no doubt.  But let’s go over quickly what we know.  1) Morrow can’t stay healthy.  2) Closing puts a lot of stress on a pitcher, physical and otherwise. 3) Batista’s their backup plan.  4) Batista sucks.  5) Batista spiked the Mariners’ drink.

It’s time to take our beginning of the month look at all the fantasy baseball closers.  Here at Razzball we are always evolving like Saaphyri’s alliance on I Love Money 2, so I’ve added pluses and minuses in parenthesis for the movement a closer has had since the last time I went over them.  For example, if B.J. Ryan fell twelve spots from 10 to 25, he has a parenthetical negative fifteen next to his name.  If there was no change, no parenthetical.  I also removed the team they close for, because if you don’t know that, I’m not sure how much I can help you.  More than anything else, the closer list is constantly changing.  So you kinda need to follow along to my daily roundups, but if you like to have things all in one place, here ya go.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.

1. Joe Nathan (+1) (Jesse Crain)
2. Jonathan Papelbon (-1) (Takashi Saito, Hideki Okajima)
3. Brad Lidge (Ryan Madson)
4. Mariano Rivera (Damaso Marte)
5. Francisco Rodriguez (J.J. Putz)
6. Joakim Soria (Joel Peralta, Kyle Farnsworth)

Donkey-corns

Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes his the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkey-corns.

7. Jonathan Broxton (Hong-Chih Kuo, Cory Wade)
8. Bobby Jenks (+1) (Octavio Dotel, Matt Thornton, Scott Linebrink)
9. Kerry Wood (+3) (Jensen Lewis, Rafael Perez, Rafael Betancourt)
10. Jose Valverde (+3) (LaTroy Hawkins)
11. Chad Qualls (+3) (Jon Rauch, Tony Pena)
12. Heath Bell (+4) (Mike Adams)
13. Brian Fuentes (-2) (Jose Arredondo, Scot Shields)
14. Kevin Gregg (+1) (Carlos Marmol)
15. Frank Francisco (+6) (C.J. Wilson)
16. Matt Capps (+2) (John Grabow)
17. Francisco Cordero (-9) (David Weathers, Jared Burton)
18. Mike Gonzalez (+2) (Rafael Soriano)
19. Brad Zielger (Santiago Casilla, Joey Devine)
20. Brian Wilson (-3) (Jeremy Affeldt, Bob Howry)
21. Joel Hanrahan (Saul Rivera, Steven Shell)

Brain Freeze

I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Troy Percival– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Pena in the head with a pickoff throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.

22. Matt Lindstrom (+2) (Leo Nunez, Scott Proctor)
23. Huston Street (+6) (Manny Corpas, Taylor Buchholz)
24. Troy Percival (+4) (Dan Wheeler, Grant Balfour)
25. B.J. Ryan (-15) (Scott Downs, Jeremy Accardo, Jesse Carlson)
26. Jason Motte (-1) (Ryan Franklin, Kyle McClellan)
27. George Sherrill (-1) (Chris Ray)
28. Brandon Morrow (+2) (Miguel Batista, Chad Cordero, Roy Corcoran, Mark Lowe)
29. Carlos Villanueva (-2) (Trevor Hoffman, Todd Coffey, David Riske)
30. Fernando Rodney/Brandon Lyon (-6) (Ryan Perry, Joel Zumaya, Axel Foley)

Usually I wait until the 1st of every month to go over who’s closing where and who’s backing them up.  You know, the Donkey-Corn/Brain Freeze/$12 Salad post.  See, you are familiar with my work.  Great, I love how you do whatever you do too.  Being in the heart of fantasy baseball draft season, my diploma from The College of Fantasy Baseball at Charleston says I must do some early closer updates for 2009 fantasy baseball.  I’m not going to mention guys who are completely safe as of right now.  One generalization before I get to these closer schmohawks.  You want anyone getting saves.  Yes, you do.  Trust me.  You may think Lindstrom will return in 2 weeks and be fine getting 25 saves this year.  You may be right.  But if Leo Nunez starts the season as the closer, there’s just as good a chance that he keeps the job all year.  Last year, you swore Chad Cordero would get the job back from Rauch and there was no reason to grab Big Jon.  You swore Huston Street would take back the job from Ziegler.  You also missed out on good closers.  Anyway, here’s some closers to watch for 2009 fantasy baseball:

Matt Lindstrom – Strained rotator cuff.  I would still put him on my bench because he could bounce right back.  Or not…

Leo Nunez – Could easily end up with 35 saves or 5.  There’s the fun!

Trevor Hoffman – The Hoff did a slo-mo jog to the trainer’s room where he was diagnosed with a strained right oblique.  I think an oblique is the thing the monkeys are worshipping in 2001: A Space Odyssey.  Not sure.  Hoffman’s old and this could be a recurring issue.  I think he’ll be fine for the season, but if you want to plan accordingly…

Carlos Villanueva – Could be the replacement, but he has no closer experience.  He only has really-horrible-so-far-in-spring-training experience.  He may have the job of mop-up man if he can’t get his spring training act together.  Which leaves…

Todd Coffey – T.C. Odd Offey might be the guy right now for Holds and Vulture Saves.

Carlos Marmol – Since back in November I’ve been saying Piniella will go with the crappy, experienced closer over the lights out MR.  I still think Marmol is draftable in every league.  Like after 10PM at Casa de Grey, Marmol is lights out.

Kevin Gregg – Funny thing happened on the way to being a junky middle reliever, homeboy looks like he could be a junky closer.  The catch, Gregg is only good if he’s getting saves.  So who do you draft?  Both, if they’re at the right spot.  When Gregg has 15 saves in May and you trade him for Ryan Zimmerman, you’ll be happy you drafted him.

Huston Street – See Manny Corpas.

Manny Corpas – See Huston Street.  Now you’re trapped in an infinity circle of Street and Corpas!  At the end of the season, I think Corpas has more saves than Street, that doesn’t mean Corpas gets a single one in April.

Joey Devine – Came into this looooooong spring training with the job wrapped around his finger.  Probably leaving spring training as the setup man.  He’s better suited for the closer role and could slide into closing games by April 15th.  He’s also injury-prone and might not grab the job from…

Brad Ziegler – Should start the season as the A’s closer and could keep the job all year.  Stranger things have happened.

George Sherrill – He’s the closer until he’s not.  Probably sometime in May he cedes to…

Chris Ray – Hey, everyone from the Sherrill ellipsis, good to see you!

Brandon Lyon – Has the job.  No need to back him up.  Yet.

Troy Percival – Same deal as Brandon Lyon.  He’s listed here because that could change if a gust of wind catches his knee the wrong way.

Mark Lowe – The Mariners Moose – Chad Cordero – Miguel Batista – Tyler Walker – David Aardsma – The Mariners Moose moved up the depth chart for this closing job.  Cordero will be closing by late-May and collect 20 saves; stash him on your bench.  Grab Lowe for the ten saves he could provide.

Chris Perez – It really seems like Perez slept with LaRussa’s daughter or something.  In fairness, Perez is not exactly winning the hearts and minds of the Cards coaches.

Ryan Franklin – 75% chance he gets the job.  Before you explode in the comments, I agree, Franklin’s not better than Perez or Motte.  You tell that to LaRussa.  Sometimes experience beats out skill set.

Jason Motte – Has an outside shot at the Cards job.  Don’t sleep on Motte!  Unless, of course, you’re drowsy and he gives you a knee to rest on.