Michael Wuertz

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Morrison Breaks On Through

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 211 Comments

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Logan Morrison played at the same community college as Albert Pujols.  That’s two more MLB players than Middlesex County College or MC-squared as we called it.  Let’s look at what Stephen wrote about Morrison, “Blessed with a balanced, flat swing with plus-power, and the organization’s best plate-discipline…  The only thing more exciting than Morrison is pasting copies of Grey’s photo to a dartboard and piercing his eyeballs.”  Hmm… Hadn’t read that last part before.  A rookie with good plate discipline and power is really all you need to know when considering a guy for keepers.  Own and own now.  So is it time to get on board the LogaMotive in redraft leagues?  As a disgruntled horse would say, “What the hey?”  When met with choosing between upside and a random schmohawk outfielder behind door number three, you go with upside.  Just don’t crazy and drop anyone too valuable.  I imagine Morrison will lose some playing time to Bonifacio and might struggle in the beginning.  Conservatively, I’ve give him 8 homers and a decent average.  The upside is obviously there and if he hits out of the gate, his name value will provide more than his actual worth on the trade market.  A lot depends on if the Marlins take it fast or slow with LogaMo.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jason Bay – Out with a mild concussion.  This would explain a lot if it happened in March and was just discovered.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Diamondbacks Wash That Ace Right Outta Their Haren

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 81 Comments

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Dan Haren was traded to the Angels for a terrible pitcher and some prospects.  On a real baseball note, the Diamondhacks got had like they were taking cards from Ricky Jay.  I think the desert sun’s baked their brains.  To make a deal in the major leagues, you see what the Yankees will give you then you dangle that deal in front of all other clubs.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Closer Look

| Closers | 171 Comments

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For the first time in over two years, Jonathan Papelbon is no longer a $12 Salad.  I know, call your Congressman.  Pass Prop 12.  There’s been signs for a long time that he wasn’t the same closer from 2007.  I didn’t want to move him because he seemed like the epitome of a $12 Salad.  Overpriced lettuce?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Many Javy Returns

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 166 Comments

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Javier Vazquez touched you in your no-no area for two months to the point where just looking at his name made you crawl up into a ball and cry, but yesterday he flirted with a no-no for seven innings.  He held the 1927 Blue Jays to only one hit, a home run by HGH Wells.  (In a strange twist, Bautista didn’t homer, but he did have sex with your wife.  Don’t shoot the messenger!)  So can Javier Vazquez now be trusted?  The better question is did anyone really think he was the 8 ERA pitcher he was showing in April and May?  Come on, this is baseball.  It’s a sport of aberrations from day-to-day and week-to-week and month-to-month, but, in the end, people find their level.  Vazquez is more or less a 4.50 ERA pitcher in the AL.  So you need some months of dreckitude surrounded by some months of usability.  Vazquez is still walking too many guys and, other than him striking out 9 Blue Kays yesterday and the Suckie-O’s the game before, his Ks have been down.  So usable, but don’t expect a full return of 2009 Vazquez.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Mike Stanton – He’s coming up on Tuesday.  Can you hear that?  It’s my heart going pitter patter.  Put your ear up to the computer monitor, you’ll hear it.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Closer Look

| Closers | 184 Comments

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The Brain Freezes lived up to their names last month.  With Jenks, Hoffman, Gregg, Dotel, Lidge, Funklin Morales, Qualls, Perez, Wood and Simon all putting dry ice on your fantasy baseball team and then shattering it.  No one ever said owning Brain Freezes would be easy, but does it have to be this hard?  Can’t I just Ron Popeil my Jenkses and Hoffmen and let them be?  No, of course, I can’t.  It would be too easy.  I come from the school that if a guy has a chance to earn even one save, I’ll own them.  Sometimes this yields 6 saves from Alfredo Simon, other times this yields 12 earned runs in a third of an inning from Will Ohman.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Closer Look

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 151 Comments

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Joe Nathan and Huston Street are gone and everyone moved up.  That’s why people like Matt Capps and Chris Perez have done little but squat on the john yet moved up the rankings.  Though I still managed to find a way to not move up Brian Fuentes.  The way we’re going there won’t be any $12 Salads by May.  Then what?  $8 Side Dishes?  Who needs roasted cauliflower with truffle oil?  Not me!  I’m happy with a baked potato.  Yes, sir!  Hmm… Maybe I shouldn’t write these right before lunch.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Closer Look

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 120 Comments

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The murmurs of Heath Bell getting traded to another team by July are getting louder.  (BTW, I love the word murmurs.  I really wanted the survivors on Lost to call The Others, The Murmurs.  Wouldn’t that have been awesome?!  Okay, maybe me.)  Prepare for a dozen or so posts titled, “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” at some of our weak sister sites.  And by “weak sister,” I’m talking prison slang and I mean ESPN.  I moved Bell down one whole spot.  I’m not worried in March about someone who might get traded in July.  He will probably drop one or two spots each month until July.  If you get 23 saves, a 1.69 ERA, 1.08 WHIP, 42 Ks in 37 1/3 innings pre-All-Star Break, you’ll be mad you drafted him?  Bee tee dubya, those were his 1st half numbers last year.  Then who knows where he goes.  Maybe Lidge and Madson finally give Manuel a coronary and Bell takes over the closing duties in Philly as Victorino player-manages.  Or maybe Bell goes somewhere else.  You get the picture; it’s still early.  Don’t overestimate-slash-overthink-slash-overrate… Just don’t “over” anything.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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Top 20 Middle Relievers, 2010 Fantasy Baseball

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 54 Comments

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The 2010 fantasy baseball rankings are just about in the bag, but first we look at the top 20 middle relievers for 2010 fantasy baseball.  No, next we’re not going to do the Top 20 Guys Who Will Have The Most Balks.  Chillax.  The only fantasy baseballers (<–my Mom’s term) that seem to pay attention to middle relievers are those that play in a Holds league.  That’s wrong, I tell ya.  A great way to balance out your ratios is by carrying a few middle relievers on your staff.  (BTW, Ron Jeremy can carry three middle relievers on his staff.)  Say you had James Shields last year and he mistook your team’s ERA for his toilet, but you also had Takashi Saito.  With just Shields, you had the 4.14 ERA dump to clean up.  With Saito and his brand new toilet brush, you had a 3.80 ERA.  If you also carried Matt Thornton, you had a combined 3.59 ERA.  Not to mention, you had 6 vulture saves.  Oh, and your WHIP went from Shields’s 1.41 to 1.28 and had an additional 139 Ks.  Middle relievers can also help balance out your junky closers.  Okay, school’s out, Alice Cooper.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 middle relievers for 2010 fantasy baseball:

1.

Please, blog, may I have some more?