Excuse me for one second, there’s a doorbell ringing.  *opens door*  “Luigi!  Paisan!  What are you doing here?”  To you, “This is Luigi, my tailor.  And, yes, I’m addressing you, the audience, like it’s Sesame Street.”  “Grey Liotta, as you insist I call you, I saw Michael Conforto had a huge game –  3-for-4, 4 RBIs and hit his 12th and 13th homers, now hitting .333 with a .425 OBP — and I say I have to go see my favorite customer to let out his inseam.”  “Ah, Luigi!  You know me better than anyone, except my mustachioed mother and even more stereotypical Italian barber!”  On a serious note, what Michael Conforto is doing now is why the Mets should promote Amed Rosario.  Reyes, Walker, yadda, blah, blooie are not going to lead to anything of note.  Maybe they have a good game or two, maybe a solid week, but, in the end, you have *raspberries lips* and Rosario still with no major league experience.  Not even saying Amed’s the answer like Iverson, but you have to give guys a chance over these third-rate vets that lead you nowhere.  If the Mets had given Conforto the at-bats all last year, he might’ve came out of his 1st half slump and carried them in the 2nd half and thru the playoffs.  As for those who don’t know me as well as Luigi, I’ve always said Conforto would be an All-Star at some point.  This is not out of nowhere, nor someone to sell high.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Has there been any “sleeper” more hyped this season than Charlie Morton? It seems like we’re constantly being reminded of the spike in velocity, the swing and miss stuff, the combination of swinging strikes, and groundball rate. Knowing all this I was dying to profile Morton and see what all the noise is about. Speaking of Noise, my Pittsburgh scout, and favorite right testicle Dr. Kenneth Noisewater, has a basket full of hot takes on Morton, that mostly consist of different ways to say Charlie Morton sucks. Perhaps Noisey is right, perhaps all the lemmings in the fantasy industry are right. Much like the ATLiens that raised me to be an emotionally well adjusted gangster, I just stay in the middle and drop bombs, mostly in the toilet. I stay regular ladies and gents. Let’s take a closer look at this “new and improved” Charlie Morton, and see if it’s in fact a new recipe, or the same re-packed garbage.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hello all my loyal followers!  I hope everyone is well on this amazing Wednesday.  I’ll tell you right now I’m in love with today’s slate.  There are two pitchers I love today, but I’ll go into that a little later.  The team I love today is the Texas Rangers.  As a team, they’re really starting to heat up, having scored five or more runs in five of their last six games.  Texas also faces off with a pretty bad pitcher in Elfin from the Phillies.  Finally, this game will take place in Globe Life Park which becomes a launching pad once we get into summer.  We’re lucky enough to get a nice hot, humid day today and I expect the ball to fly in this park.  My lineups will start with Rougned Odor at $2,800; he’s playing a lot better and I expect it to continue.  He’s slowly starting to hit and he’s also beginning to steal some bags.  He should continue that today.  Others I like today are Elvis Andrus at $3,000,  Joey Gallo at $3,200, and Delino DeShields at $2,800.  All three of these guys bring something a little different to the table.  Andrus has five hits in his last two games and has really turned into a solid run producer for a team that really needs it.  Gallo is just a beast who can hit a homerun any at bat, and Deshields will probably hit lead off with huge steal upside.  He also has a very sneaky batters eye with solid pop.

Now on to the picks…

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Is there anything better than baseball on a rainy Saturday afternoon? You can’t do any yard work, you know, because it’s pouring, so you settle into your favorite chair, crack a beer, and you’re whisked away to a place much warmer, and much sunnier. Here I sit, beer in hand, ready to watch this week’s test subject Royals righty Nate Karns vs the first place Baltimore Orioles. The journeymen starter is on his 4th organization in five seasons, and there’s two ways to look at this. Either Karns can’t keep a job, or he’s highly “in-demand” by multiple teams throughout the league. The truth lies somewhere in the middle, never good enough to lock-down a rotation spot, but also good enough to find opportunity year after year. So far Karns has been a good fit in Kansas City, making his 7th start today vs. a surprisingly mediocre Orioles offense, one that ranks in the bottom half of MLB in nearly every offensive category. So the home matchup vs. Baltimore is a good one, even if it’s a first place club he’s facing…. Here’s what I saw on Saturday.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Brewers manager Craig Counsell announced Friday that after Thursday’s blown save, Neftali Feliz would be given a break from closer duties. Why are you like this, Craig? Do you not care about my fantasy team even a little? Feliz has blown just one save this season. Sure, he’s sporting an ugly 6.19 ERA, and 1.31 WHIP, and 4 losses but I didn’t draft him for his ratios! I drafted him for his those stinky, stinky saves. Mmmm. His eight of which currently leads my team! Regardless, Jared Hughes  (0.2 IP, SV (1)) notched the save last night for Milwaukee, but it sounds like ex-stuntman Corey Knebel will get the next chance. Corey is rocking a 1.00 ERA, 1.00 WHIP and 29/8 K/BB rate over 18.0 innings this season and seems like the most logical choice to replace Feliz mostly because Counsell mentioned Friday he’s been “outstanding.” That’s high praise from skip, folks! Hughes, Jacob Barnes and Oliver Drake could also see chances. This is not to say Feliz is out of the ninth inning role for good, but I could definitely see Corey running away with the job if he continues to pitch like he has been. If you’re looking for saves I’d add Evil Knebel everywhere, and if you’re looking for someone to jump over 20 mack trucks in a motorcycle, you might consider Bumgarner or maybe the another stunt guy.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

George Springer ($3,600) has always had power. He can do things with a baseball that few can do. He’s hit balls over 115 mph, hits balls over 460 feet and averages 31 homers per 162. He’s pretty good. The best ball he’s probably ever hit, however, is probably one just a few people have seen. He was 18, and it was on a June day in 2008 for his summer travel team at Baseball Heaven in Yaphank, NY. The pitcher (and I won’t name names, to protect the innocent) threw him a pitch and he hit a tank to dead center, over the trees and onto the entrance way of the facility. According to Google Earth the bomb Springer hit, and the picture is below, was ~526 feet. A scout who was in attendance said, “I’ve scouted many thousands of baseball games in the past many years and I’ve never seen a home run hit harder or farther.” Springer gets to face Jordan Montgomery, who is a fly ball pitcher (40.5% GB rate) who doesn’t miss that many bats (7.68 projected K/9) and walks guys (projected 3.77 BB/9). Oh yeah, Springer is also likely to bat leadoff.

On to the picks as soon as that Springer bomb lands…

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond?  Well be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.  Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

We all have fears, no matter who you are, no matter what you’ve been through, you’re scared of something. It might be clowns, maybe it’s spiders, perhaps it’s being strapped to a chair Clockwork Orange style, and forced to watch a Ben Stiller movie marathon. Totally a plausible scenario, might I add. While not quite as frightening as any of the aforementioned options, I must admit, I have developed a new fear. And no it’s not the fear of Grey mistaking me for Giancarlo, and having to have him surgically removed from my toilet leg. No, that ain’t it, though I am frightened by that thought. It’s far more topical, and far less titillating. It’s the fear of covering a bad start in my weekly pitching profiles. What fate could be worse than writing up an absolute slugfest? What if the pitcher I pick is chased in less than 3 innings? What if he trips and falls jumping imaginary lines? Shizz happens, right? So to prevent this, I decided to pick out three games, record them, and use the start I like best. In my whitewashed, pre-fab world of pitching, there are no bad starts, only starters I poorly ranked.  So who did I go with? Who was this lucky recipient of my barely readable prose? Well, it just so happens, I decided to go ying to last week’s yang, and cover another young AL East starter, facing the Cubs on Sunday Night baseball. That’s right, this week’s Pitcher Profile is on Yankees righty Luis Severino. Not a bad time to dive into the young flamethrower as he’s hotter than fish grease.

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What you didn’t think I was going to go full homer with my debut pitching profile? I mean, it’s as if you don’t even know me? Suffice it to say we’ve turned the keys to the Top 100 pitching ship from one homer, to another. Truth be told, it was a busy weekend, as I covered for Grey on Friday, recorded the Prospect Podcast on that night with Halp, traveled to New York for Smokey’s 40th birthday, took in the Saturday Yanks vs. O’s game with Smokey and the crew, wrote my Minor League Update, and drove back to Massachusetts Sunday morning. Not to mention I was only tasked with this honor Thursday evening, right after I returned from my oldest son’s first baseball practice of the season. So to say it’s been a hectic few days is an understatement. However, a date for Edurado Rodriguez with the Cubs seemed like a good test for his new found swing and miss tendencies. It should be mentioned, that coming into the game Ed-Rod sported a 33 at bat hitless streak vs righthanded batters. So I was going to be paying extra attention as to how he attacked righties vs lefties, and what sequencing, pitch, etc. was leading to his success. Let’s get into it.

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Today’s slate is chalked full of horrible pitchers and the launching pad we know as Coors Field.  This is the worst kind of situation…you have Colorado/Washington in Coors who everybody wants to stack.  Adding two trashy starting pitchers going – Tanner Roark and Tyler Chatwood – makes this a nightmare situation for DFS players.  In cash games this seems simple, you just play them and move on.  In GPP this isn’t so easy, everyone is going to have a piece of this game.  You can differentiate yourself by doing the opposite, I personally will be doing that.  Do this 10 times and you may only be right a few times,  but your probability of winning big money goes WAY up.  So fair warning, I won’t be covering Colorado or Washington guys in my picks.  Obviously you can play them, and should play them (especially in cash games) but I’m here to try and win you all a GPP!

Now onto the picks…

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond?  Well be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.  Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care! 

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yesterday (but really every time he pitches), Chris Sale went 8 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 13 Ks, ERA down to 0.91, and yet another no decision.  Elias Sports Bureau said, “Chris Sale had his 4th start in last five seasons on Thursday with 8 IP, 10+ Ks, 0 ER without getting win; no one else has more than one.  Also, there’s 16 different vending machines in our company to choose from, but only one has M&M’s and Drake’s Apple Fruit Pie for 50 Cent that elicits Snickers with the wrappers.”  God, what a bunch of nerds!  Not like us fantasy baseball cool kids!  I wanna tent the Elias Sports Bureau office, fart in there and leave.  Seriously, that’s what I want.  I need a wish genie, up in here!  Up in here!  So, Chris Sale is flippin’ awesome once again, and nothing can stop him except a rock vs. his scissors.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?