Fantasy Baseball Advice

I’m no Nostradumbass, but I’m telling you there’s not going to be a whole lot of greatness coming out of this post.  We’re Cousteau deep right now.  The first tier have some nice flyers that you may drop after a week or so and the other schmohawks in this post are, well, schmohawks.  So all the 2012 fantasy baseball rankings are found under yonder and we’re moving onto pitchers next.  That should excite you, you special person you.  C’mon, let me pinch your cheeks.  I didn’t say your face cheeks.  Hey now!  Anyway, here’s the top 80 outfielders for 2012 fantasy baseball:

61. Alex Presley – This tier started in the top 60 outfielders for 2012 fantasy baseball post.  This tier goes from here until Mitch Moreland.  I called this tier, “You may get a top 20 outfielder from any of these guys.  Or a guy you want to drop by April 15th.”  I already went over my Alex Presley fantasy.  I wrote it while suing Supercuts for giving me simply a “great cut.”  2012 Projections:  80/10/60/.270/20

62. Mike Carp -  I sorta mentioned this in the top 60 outfielder post, but a big problem we’re having right now is there are some real interesting upside gambles on some really terrible teams.  Can someone pull a fast one and switch Carp with Trout?  For the job, I propose Tim Salmon.  Most of the schmohawks in this tier look like they Revere, Ben.  At least with Carp, he’s giving you power, though, maybe nothing else.  2012 Projections:  55/21/70/.260/3

63. Chris Heisey – I like Chris Heisey a lot lot.  Maybe too much, since he plays for Dusty Baker who insists on putting the horns to at least one young player.  Heisey is either a righty who can’t hit lefties or a righty who hasn’t been given a fair shake to hit lefties.  I think it’s the former, but if it’s the latter then you could have a nice get with Heisey.  With his K-rates, there’s a very real chance he hits .240, but he could also hit 20 homers and steal 15 bases.  There’s also the whole Ryan Ludwick issue.  But Baker wouldn’t really play him over Heisey, would he?  Um, well, it’s a late flyer.  2012 Projections:  50/17/65/.250/10

64. Dayan Viciedo – Having a hard time seeing past his K-rate and his lack of major league experience, but know someone who isn’t having a hard time with those things?  Bill James.  His projections for Viciedo are 21/3/.275.  Viciedo had a .186 average vs. righties last year, but, as I tell girlfriends, that’s just a small sample size.  He has destroyed minor league pitching and he’s only a Latin 22.  2012 Projections:  60/15/70/.260/3

65. Michael Brantley – Some crazy speed in the minors, but almost 500 plate appearances last year translated to the majors about as well as French comedy translates here.  He’s like the American League version of Dexter Fowler (or the outfield’s Alcides Escobar, if that works better for you).  Brantley stole 46 bases in Triple-A in 2009.  Don’t make me hire Davey Lopes to coach you.  Just run.  2012 Projections:  60/6/50/.275/20

66. Josh Reddick – I already went over my Josh Reddick fantasy when he was traded. I did it like this, I did it like that. I did it with a Wiffle ball bat. 2012 Projections: 75/15/85/.260/10

67. Jon Jay – There’s been some speculation that The Federalist may not be the starting center fielder for the Cardinals.  La Russa’s Feathered Hair, “Hey, you don’t have me to kick around anymore!  That’s on Matheny.”  Until Allen Craig returns from surgery, Jon Jay should book that job, so there’s no reason to ask, why do the righteous suffer?  2012 Projections:  50/12/40/.280/10

68. Alejandro De Aza – Last year in Triple-A, he had 9 homers, 22 steals and hit .322 in 99 games.  He was also 27 years old.  Sounds Quad-A-ey (which is not a legal word for Words With Friends; I’ve tried).  But, in only 171 plate appearances in the major leagues, he had 4 homers and 12 steals.  That’s 12/30 over the course of a full season.  Too bad they outlawed full seasons after Ripken retired.   Could give De Aza a shot in March and when he’s no longer worth owning, you can tell your friends you just did the Alejandrop.  Don’t get sad!  Imaginary friends work too!  2012 Projections:  60/7/30/.270/20

69. John Mayberry – Last year, at the age of 27, he finally saw significant time in the major leagues.  He also kept his K-rate fairly manageable.  Maybe he was learning to walk again.  Damn, that Foo Fighters song is annoyingly catchy.  If Clarence were to show Ryan Howard what life would’ve been like without him, John Mayberry may have had a career.  While Ryan Howard is learning to walk again — ugh, so catchy — Mayberry should be starting somewhere.  2012 Projections:  40/18/55/.250/10 in 400 ABs.

70. Jordan Schafer – I almost avoided putting any Astros hitters into any favorable ranking tiers.  Oh, well.  Here’s one, and even if you’re drafting purely on Zimmermania, Jordan Schafer is barely registering above yawnstipating.  Person who just stumbled on Razzball, “Zimmermania?  Yawnstipating?  What is this mustachioed fool talking about?”  Schafer isn’t much more than SAGNOF (Again, huh?!) but he hit as many as 10 homers in Double-A one year so maybe he can do something without the pressure of the pennant race.  (Astros fan, “Oh, just wait until 2028 for us to come on!  Assuming all other major leagues team fall to the Plague of 2027.”)  Dang, two Astros zings in one post.  Hey, one zing for each of their fans.  2012 Projections:  75/5/35/.245/25

71. Mitch Moreland – Was surprised to see he didn’t make my top 20 1st basemen post.  Not sure what I was thinking.  And if I don’t know, who’s gonna?  What I might’ve been thinking was he’s already light on power and this offseason he had wrist surgery, which is not a recipe for more power as the Barefoot Contessa would tell you.  2012 Projections:  60/15/70/.275/3

72. Angel Pagan – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Span.   I call this tier, “It’s hard for me to tell you to draft these guys, because, if things work out as planned, I won’t.  But one of them might be more valuable than I’m ranking them, and, if you know which one, you’re a witch and that scares me.”  You know what’s weird?  Pagan and Torres seem to always be linked in the rankings.  You’re like, “They’re the same person!”  But they were traded for each other.  How do you figure that?  Weird, right?  Yeah, I’m smart.  2012 Projections:  75/6/40/.280/27

73. Andres Torres – I could tell you to just look 1/8th of an inch above, but that’s lazy talk!  *thinking*  Actually, just look above.  Thanks!  2012 Projections:  70/5/40/.265/24

74. Seth Smith – The Lisper’s Nightmare will finally get to start without having to look over his shoulder.  And it’s now in Oakland, which is yet another pitchers’ park that ends in “co.”   Thit!  2012 Projections:  55/15/70/.275/10

75. Martin Prado – Went over Prado’s projections in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2012 fantasy baseball.

76. Josh Willingham – I can hear someone giving me guff for putting The Other White Meat this low in the rankings, but really he’s the first guy you drop when you want to pick up a hot hitter.  Admit it at least to yourself.  Willingham is the same as every other hot schmotato Luke Scott-Ty Wigginton clone that gets hot for a few weeks.  2012 Projections:  65/22/80/.250/3

77. Jason Kubel – I fought with myself over whether to put Kubel or Willingham first in these rankings.  Finally, I flipped my Morneau voodoo doll and it came up heads, which either meant Willingham should be ranked first or another year of Morneau head trauma.  I’ll let you decide.  2012 Projections:  60/20/75/.260

78. Ben Revere – Span and Revere seem like another two guys that are forever linked.  You say, “Same player!  Move on!”  But how do you explain that they play on the same team?  Still weird!  2012 Projections:  70/1/35/.280/30

79. Denard Span – Again, if I were going to be lazy– Eh, just look above.  2012 Projections:  65/4/55/.280/25

80. Carlos Lee – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until the end of the post.  I call this tier, “In less than 7 years, these guys will receive just over 5% of the Hall of Fame vote and barely stay on the ballot for one more year.”  Hey, do the Astros a favor, Chuck Lee, and shut em’ down.  2012 Projections:  60/20/80/.265/3

80 1/8. Grady Sizemore – Sizemore is only 29 years old and only three years removed from a 33/38 season.  But, oh, what a three year span that was.  He took naked photos of himself and his career took the exact inverse (inter)course of Kim Kardashian’s.  Turned out Tom Sizemore wasn’t the only Sizemore with a joint problem and Grady is starting to show the wear and tear of an 80-year-old man like his first name makes him sound.  With a 28.8% K-rate and 4 steals in the last two years, there’s really no reason to believe in Sizemore, but if you want to believe in miracles.  2012 Projections:  75/17/60/.245/5

80 1/4. Jason Bay – Member the days when Jason Bay was good?  We wore our hair longer then.  Well, you had hair.  We had some laughs!  Crazy times!  2012 Projections:  60/20/65/.250/8

80 what/fraction-is-this? Aubrey Huff – For almost his entire career, he’s alternated between good years and bad years.  If you think that’s a reason why he’s going to be good in 2012, I’ll tell you it’s hooey.  Grey, “It’s hooey.”  See?  2012 Projections:  50/18/65/.255/3

80 1/2. Alfonso Soriano – About three years ago, Soriano turned 47 years old and he just hasn’t looked the same.  “Get outta here you little brats, grandpa’s gotta go limp around the outfield!  Geez, Vlad’s got it so easy with the DH.”  That’s Alfonso in the dugout babysitting Starlin Castro and Geovany Soto.  2012 Projections: 45/18/60/.240/3

80 3/4. Bobby Abreu – He shouldn’t even be ranked.  He’s coasting on good vibes and bad farts.*  (*That’s my saying, but use it so it catches on.  Your mother at dinner, “What do you think of that Ashton Kutcher?”  You, “He’s coasting on good vibes and bad farts.”  See?  It’s easy to use.)  2012 Projections:  60/10/65/.250/15

Top 20 catchers, 1st basemen and 2nd basemen for 2011 are in the books.  We continue around the horn (that means we’ll go back for the shortstops; don’t ask, I was getting fancy) bringing us to the top 20 3rd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball.   This year 3rd base gave most of you the gas face.  For the most part, you were lucky if you didn’t draft a top ranked one cause most of them bombed.  I mean, Emilio Bonifacio is a top five 3rd baseman?  That’s an eff in the coolie if I’ve ever heard one.  Zimmerman, Longoria, Wright?  Made you look smart in opposite world.  Also, to recap, this final ranking is from ESPN Player Rater with my comments.  The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

1. Jose Bautista – A very wise monkey once said, sometimes when you go out on a limb, the branch breaks.  To use limb in another sentence:  I don’t think it’s much of a limb when I say Bautista was my biggest snafu since I started this blog.  I really didn’t believe him at all.  The kicker was usually when I Mr. Bungle a player as bad as I did with Bautista, Rudy will correct me, but he punted Bautista too, so I wasn’t even counterbalanced.  I can’t say this for sure, but it seems like most ‘perts don’t give a flying elbow if they make right or wrong calls, but I will say Bautista taught me one thing.  I don’t like being wrong; it really annoyed me that I mucked him up.  Now watch next year when I project him for 40 homers, he’s gonna hit 12 and make me into a Mr. Bungle once again.   Preseason Rank #12 (Yes, I was that much a non-believer; I had Pedro Alvarez above him.  I will now eat an apple laced with cyanide.), 2011 Projections:  70/25/80/.240/5, Final Numbers:  105/43/103/.302/9

2. Michael Young – Went over Young in the top 20 1st basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball post.

3. Adrian Beltre – I was pretty accurate with my mid-tier 3rd basemen preseason ranking.  Beltre, Young, Reynolds, Alvarez, Aramis and McGehee turned out as I thought they would, minus McGehee and Alvarez, obviously.  Unfortunately, I ended up with Alvarez and McGehee on more teams than I care to admit.  Alvarez, in particular, killed me.  This, however, is supposed to be about Beltre.  As soon as he signed with the Rangers, any trepidation I had went out the window.  Man Standing Outside My Metaphorical Window, “Stopping throwing trepidation on me!”  Preseason Rank #7, 2011 Projections:  80/24/95/.285/7, Final Numbers:  82/32/105/.296/1

4. Aramis Ramirez – Here’s one way to look at how pee poor the 3rd basemen were.  I pretty much nailed Aramis’s projections with his final numbers and I ranked him 11th and he finished 4th.  That, more or less, means seven 3rd basemen bombed.  Also, more or less should be one word.  Moreorless — doesn’t that look better?  You’re welcome, English language; I’m fixing you.  Preseason Rank #11, 2011 Projections:  75/25/90/.280, Final Numbers:  80/26/93/.306/1

5. Emilio Bonifacio – There’s nothing I can say that will illustrate how bad the 3rd basemen are that can’t be said by just seeing how high Bonifacio ranked here.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  78/5/36/.296/40

6. Jhonny Peralta – After looking like a lock for 20+ homers and a .270 average back in 2008, he wrestled with major league pitching like I wrestle with his superfluous H.  Due to some luck, his average was about 20 points too high, but everything else seems right in line with what he can do.  He’s ranked this high because 3rd basemen sucked this year.  Have you heard that before?  Yeah, thought so.  Preseason Ranked #16 for Shortstops, 2011 Projections:  65/17/80/.255, Final Numbers:  68/21/86/.299

7. Pablo Sandoval – In the preseason, I compared him to an in-his-prime Lyle Overbay.  Still sounds about right.  Before you scoff, scoffer.  Lyle Overbay’s best year 82/22/92/.312/5 was better than this year by Sandoval.  Preseason Rank #13, 2011 Projections:  70/18/80/.305/3, Final Numbers:  55/23/70/.315/2

8. Mark Reynolds – Went over Reynolds in the top 20 1st basemen post.

9. Ryan Roberts – Went over Roberts in the top 20 2nd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball post.

10. Evan Longoria – I may still rank Longoria in the 1st round next year.  Absolutely nothing changed for him except his luck fell off the map.  If it wasn’t for bad luck, he would’ve had no luck at all.  His K-rate actually went down, his walk rate went up, his HR/FB% stayed where it should be.  I may even pick him to win the MVP next year.  I will probably say some variation of the preceding a dozen times this offseason, so if you missed this, don’t worry.  And if you read the preceding, forget it so it seems fresh the next twelve times I say it.  Preseason Rank #1, 2011 Projections:  105/33/115/.280/10, Final Numbers: 78/31/99/.244/3

11. Edwin Encarnacion – On one hand, I can’t believe Encarnacion ranked this high.  On the other hand, it’s more of an indictment of the 3rd basemen because his numbers don’t look that good.  On a third lesser known hand that is actually a mitten on the end of a broomstick, he was valuable in the 2nd half of the year.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  70/17/55/.272/8

12. Chipper Jones – He didn’t go unranked in the preseason because I overlooked him.  He was coming off a year when he nearly retired from injuries.  In fact, I think he did retire then decided to come back, if I remember it correctly.  Whatever.  Glass Chipper hits when he’s healthy but that ‘when’ is the size of King Kong Bundy.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  56/18/70/.275/2

13. Alex Rodriguez – It totally bit me in the ass saying I wanted a 3rd baseman in the first two rounds of last year’s drafts.  3rd base was my cross to bear, or bare if you’re a nudist.  A-Rod, Wright and Zimmerman were off the charts terrible.  Sure, A-Rod had the decency to get injured so you could replace him, but who were you replacing him with?  Wilson Betemit?  David Freese?  Bleh and Belch.  Preseason Rank #4, 2011 Projections:  90/32/110/.280/7, Final Numbers:  67/16/62/.276/4

14. Kevin Youkilis – It’s easy to say this was an off season for Youuuuuuk, but, at age 32, this could be the beginning of the end.  This is the third year in a row that he’s failed to top 136 games and the 2nd year in a row he didn’t hit 20 homers.  On a side note, here’s what I said in the preseason about Youk, “Other fantasy baseball ‘perts will say 1st base is one of the deepest positions and you shouldn’t pay for it on draft day.  …Do you feel as safe with Youuuuuk as you would with, say, Te(i)x?  I wouldn’t.  Do you feel as safe with Morneau as Fielder?  Do you feel as safe with Dunn as you do with any of the first basemen in the 1st tier?  And this is only one tier down.”  And that’s me quoting me!  Sure, that was about 1st basemen, but it mentioned Youk so I included it here.  Sue me for your zero dollar subscription fee.  Preseason Rank #8 for 1st basemen, 2011 Projections:  95/27/95/.300/5, Final Numbers:  68/17/80/.258/3

15. David Wright – It wasn’t just that the 3rd basemen were bad this year, but it was worse than that.  The good 3rd basemen weren’t just less good so you still got some draft value.  Across the board, 3rd basemen killed you.  For the first time, I felt like Wright didn’t care either.  I get it, you can go 1-for-4 with a run.  How about you hit a home freakin’ run?!  I think Metco is in his head too.  If the Mets move the fences in only one foot, but told him they moved the fences in thirty feet it would have the same impact on his power.  Preseason Rank #2, 2011 Projections:  95/30/105/.285/17, Final Numbers:  60/14/61/.254/13

16. Daniel Murphy – Went over Murphy in the top 20 2nd basemen post.

17. Albert Callaspo – Was about as steady a performer as you can find with his 3 homer, 3 steal 1st half and 3 homer, 5 steal 2nd half.  This was an illustration of how being steady isn’t always a good thing.  Callaspo may have to replace Polanco in the yawnstipating definition.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  54/6/46/.288/8

18. Ryan Zimmerman – If a player’s season can be summed up by the company he’s keeping on the year-end rankings, look at the players around Zimmerman.  Callaspo’s above him!  Daniel Murphy had a better season than Zimmerman and he stopped playing on August 7th!  I’d say 2011 was a step back for Zimmerman, but it was more like a step back, then he fell into a ditch, then someone popped a squat above him and crapped on his head.  On a side note, I’m way off on a lot of these 3rd basemen projections, but I guarantee you all ‘perts are off with these guys.  No one could’ve told you Wright, Zimmerman, etc would’ve been this bad.  I only mention this because I think it’s ridiculous some people charge for their projections.  I could pretty much tell you what any player is going to do assuming their healthy, barring a few here and there like Bautista.  But guys like Bautista are me going on a limb.  I could’ve told you 35 homers and a .280 average like everyone else and been less wrong, but what fun is that?  Now someone help me down from my soapbox.  Preseason Rank #3, 2011 Projections:  90/32/100/.285/5, Final Numbers:  52/12/49/.289/3

19. Martin Prado – Went over him in the top 20 2nd basemen post.

20. Chase Headley – If you ever wondered to yourself whether or not 3rd base was really as bad as it seemed this year, notice Chase Headley making the top 20.  Then notice he had 4 home runs on the year.  He only hit one homer at home all year.  All year!  On the positive side, he outperformed Casey McGehee.  Recurring Theme, “The third basemen were really bad this year.”  Preseason Rank #15, 2011 Projections:  70/15/85/.255/7, Final Numbers:  43/4/44/.289/13

We already went over the top 20 catchers and the top 20 1st basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball.  Today, it’s all about the top 20 2nd basemen.  The 2nd basemen pool was shallow, and, for the first time in as long as I can remember, the 2nd basemen, shortstops and 3rd basemen were more or less of equal depth.  For instance, Darwin Barney was ranked 20th for 2nd basemen and 19th for shortstops, and Daniel Murphy was ranked 15th for 2nd basemen and 16th for 3rd basemen.  To recap, this final ranking for last year is from ESPN Player Rater with my comments.  The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

1. Dustin Pedroia – It didn’t hurt Pedroia that the Sawx were in the hunt for a playoff spot until the very end of September.  Lot better than guys who are coasting through the last two weeks.  Pedroia actually didn’t exceed expectations by as much as his stats would seem.  What he did was get more PAs than were on the last Michael Bay film.  When a player exceeds 700 plate appearances, he’s bound to put up some good stats, unless his name is Nick Markakis.  Preseason Rank #4, 2011 Projections:  105/15/65/.290/15, Final Numbers:  102/21/91/.307/26

2. Robinson Cano – The curious case of Robinson Cano.  In the preseason, I said he was overrated, yet I gave him projections pretty close to where he ended up.  So was I right and he was overrated?  I’m gonna say no.  He wasn’t quite the 1st round pick that some people were making him, but considering how terrible most high picks did and how shallow 2nd base is, Cano provided stability and stats.  Preseason Rank #1, 2011 Projections:  100/27/100/.310/3, Final Numbers:  104/28/118/.302/8

3. Ian Kinsler – In the preseason, I ranked Kinsler above where most ‘perts had him.  I wanted to believe he could stay healthy one of these years.  Bingo bango!  Preseason Rank #2, 2011 Projections:  85/22/60/.270/17, Final Numbers:  121/32/77/.255/30

4. Michael Young – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2011 post.

5. Brandon Phillips – He seems like he’s always planking on a 18/14 season give or take a few homers and steals.  His average was high for him this year.  That was partly due to his line drive rate being up, partly due to his luck.  Maybe The Ghost of a Racist Marge Schott was trying to make amends by helping some of his seeing-eye hits get through.  Preseason Rank #3, 2011 Projections:  85/20/70/.270/17, Final Numbers:  94/18/82/.300/14

6. Ben Zobrist – He had three big months (April, July and September) and three terrible months.  Like off the charts bad (June:  zero homers and 2 steals; August:  1 homer, .250; May:  2 homers, 0 steals, .232 and only 5 RBIs in 99 ABs; that’s e to the gregious).  I never feel confident enough to draft Zobrist because he still seems like an overachieving utility man to me, but as Zobrist would say, “Don’t call me a utility man and don’t call Creed Christian rock.”  Preseason Rank #8, 2011 Projections:  70/15/70/.260/15, Final Numbers:  99/20/91/.269/19

7. Howie Kendrick – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2011 post.

8. Michael Cuddyer – Went over him in the top 20 1st basemen for 2011 post.

9. Ryan Roberts – First time in a long time that I can remember the first out of nowhere name being this low on a year end list of 2nd basemen.  Usually someone will sneak into the top 5 for a shallow position.  Last year, Kelly Johnson and Casey McGehee exceeded expectations.  The year before Zobrist and Aaron Hill emerged.  I’m not sure what this means, but I think it means something.  Razzball:  Where We Raise Questions We Can’t Answer!  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  86/19/65/.249/18

10. Dan Uggla – When I explained in the preseason why I had Uggla a bit lower than some other ‘perts, here’s what I said, “The reason why he’s ranked below some of the guys above but his projections look as good if not better is because A) Kinsler has the biggest upside.  B) Phillips and Pedroia are safer.  C) Uggla has the biggest downside in one category, i.e. he could hit .240.”  And that’s me quoting me!  In the end, he didn’t quite get to .240.  Yup.  Preseason Rank #5, 2011 Projections:  90/32/100/.265/5, Final Numbers:  88/36/82/.233/1

11. Neil Walker – Couple of things come to mind when I see how close my preseason projections were to the final numbers for Neil Walker.  A) I ranked him lower than he ended up, which means 2nd base was even shallower than I thought it would be.  B) His numbers were terrible and he still ranked this high, which is more just a continuation of the first point.  C) There’s no C.  Preseason Rank #15, 2011 Projections:  65/15/75/.260/7, Final Numbers:  76/12/83/.273/9

12. Rickie Weeks – In the preseason, I called Rickie Weeks overrated because of his injury risk.  As I said then and will say again, it was the easiest call of the preseason.  Preseason Rank #6, 2011 Projections:  85/18/65/.250/14, Final Numbers:  77/20/49/.269/9

13. Danny Espinosa – I pushed Espinosa pretty hard in the preseason because, as always, I ignore average and get all pumped up on power and speed.  He succeeded and failed where I thought he would.  Preseason Rank #21, 2011 Projections:  60/15/70/.245/17, Final Numbers:  72/21/66/.236/17

14. Jemile Weeks – Will probably be overdrafted next year.  I say this because he hasn’t shown any power, he plays in a terrible park with a terrible team and his walk rate (in the majors, at least) was pretty bleh.  With all that said (here comes opposite talk!), he had a great season for a midseason call-up.  He gave you what you were hoping to get from Chone Figgins (Member him?  No, I don’t either.).  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  50/2/36/.303/22

15. Daniel Murphy – How kiddie pool shallow were the 2nd basemen?  Murphy ranked this high and he played his last game on August 7th.  Three ladies and gentlemen, your 2011 2nd basemen!  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  49/6/49/.320/5

16. Kelly Johnson – He seems to alternate years with a hard-to-digest average.  (In 2009, it was .224.)  This coincides with a poor BABIP.  This year’s BABIP wasn’t as bad as 2009, but his K-rate was terrible, which helped attribute to the poor average.  He should be able to bounce back next year, but that’s far from a lock.  Preseason Rank #13, 2011 Projections:  80/17/.260/60/12, Final Numbers:  75/21/58/.222/16

17. Aaron Hill – Fitting that Hill and Johnson would be tied together in the year-end rankings, since they were swapped mid-year and had very similar seasons in the general sense.  In the specific, their seasons were totally different.  Hill looked to be an average issue hitter that could at least give you power.  Not this year.  His power completely evaporated.  Oddly enough, he doubled his line drive rate from 2010 and lowered his K-rate.  In short (which I only say after going long), Hill’s season made no sense.  Seriously, I can’t make heads or tails of it.  Yes, even in hindsight it’s not 20/20.  It will take some brass ones to go all in on Hill again next year, but I’m leaning that way right now.  Preseason Rank #7, 2011 Projections:  80/25/85/.275/5, Final Numbers:  61/8/61/.246/21

18. Martin Prado – During the preseason, I ranked him extremely low at 17th overall for 2nd basemen.  This was such blasphemy, Matthew Berry called me out during one of his chats to say I was stoopid (sic).  Turned out I didn’t rank him low enough, with rank being the key word.  Preseason Rank #17, 2011 Projections:  85/12/60/.300/5, Final Numbers:  66/13/57/.260/4

19. Chase Utley – Sadly, the Utley we fell in love with in 2005 is no longer with us.  This new version is brittle like his pomade after it dries.  On a side note, with the loss of Howard for most if not all of 2012 and Utley’s deteriorating health, the Phils got weak fast.  Preseason Rank #4, 2011 Projections:  50/14/55/.280/5, Final Numbers:  54/11/44/.259/14

20. Darwin Barney – I didn’t rank him in the preseason and he shouldn’t even be ranked now.  The Purple Evolutionist’s final numbers show a guy that was helpful for a couple weeks here and there, but if you owned him all year, you lost your league.  Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers:  66/2/43/.276/9

In our ongoing schmohawk series where I breakdown overrated players for 2011 fantasy baseball, I’ve gone into depth on some of these guys.  I decided to also take a lookie-loo at ESPN and Yahoo’s top 100 and some players that I thought were overrated.  If you click on a player’s name, you’ll see whole posts dedicated to these schmohawks.  Anyway, here’s some overrated players for 2011 fantasy baseball:

Robinson Cano – ESPN:  ADP, 6.  I’m actually a fan of Cano if you’re getting him at the end of the 2nd round.  That’s exactly his value.  That was his value last year when you were getting him in the 4th to 5th round and that’s his value this year.  At 6 overall, you’re overpaying.  BTW, if I were in any way proficient in Photoshop, I’d do a graph that showed player’s actual value and how that remains linear while perception changes.  I think that’s kinda the secret to fantasy.  Once you know a player’s actual value you just dance through the raindrops of other people’s perception.  School’s out, Alice Cooper!

Carlos Gonzalez – ESPN:  9; Yahoo:  8.  There are a bunch of things about CarGo that make me wary, which makes it surprising to me that no one else seems to have any issue with him.  On top of the things mentioned in the CarGo overrated post, he’s also a bumps-and-bruises, miss-a-few-days-here-and-there type guy.  Those day-to-day things can turn into more.

Jose Bautista – ESPN and Yahoo:  36.  I told everyone to draft Mark Reynolds when he was going around 200 in the 2009 preseason.  Then, in 2010, he shot up to the 2nd and 3rd round last year and I told you he was overrated.  He bombed and is now being drafted in 10th to 12th rounds.  What happened in 2010 with Reynolds is what’s happening right now with Bautista.  Next year, I’ll probably tell you to draft Bautista again.  Value vs. perception.  Okay, putting away my harp.

Rickie Weeks – Yahoo:  42.  If you jumped out of a DeLorean and told me Weeks is being drafted around 120th in 2012, I wouldn’t be surprised, but would wonder why fantasy baseball average draft positions is what you decided to focus on with the ability to time travel.

Andre Ethier – Yahoo:  48.  I’ve actually felt like Ethier has been overrated every year since he broke out.  Not entirely sure why, but there ya go.

Billy Butler – Yahoo:  58.  His Rubenesque physique probably has some people thinking he’s going to hit 25 homers.  This Biggie Smalls isn’t even a lock for 20 homers.  I get it if you’re into BBW, but I’d lay off the moobs in the 5th round.

David Price – Yahoo:  66.  Price is one of those guys that I’m avoiding that I’m not entirely convinced I’m doing right by avoiding him, but his xFIP last year of 3.99 has me spooked.  Then throw in his division and I’ll let someone else draft him this year.  I think we’ll see each other again in 2012.

Martin Prado – ESPN and Yahoo:  79.  I think this ranking is crackers.  This is one of those cases like Ichiro where I think people are just overrating batting average.  There’s two things you can get a good handle on, speed and power.  Batting average, Runs and RBIs are fickle.  Runs and RBIs you can kinda figure by ABs, lineup and lineup position.  Figuring out batting average is a fool’s errand, if I’m using that cliche correctly.

We continue our 2011 fantasy baseball rankings with the top 20 2nd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball.  For the first time in a while, there’s no 2nd baseman in the top 10.  At least by my calculation.  Some ‘perts are putting Cano in the top 10, but I talk more about that later this afternoon. (Yes, we’re moving back to two posts a day.  You’re excited.)  There’s a few 2nd basemen that really stand out.  I want a 40 steal 2nd baseman.  Eric Young Jr., “I’ll be your huckleberry, Grey.”  Aw, thanks, Junior.  I want a 2nd baseman with Uggla-like power but for half the price.  Ryan Raburn, “May I interest you in some Raburn?”  You may, but only if you have eligibility in my league.  As with the previous ranking lists, tiers and my projections are noted.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2011 fantasy baseball:

1. Robinson Cano – In the top 20 for 2011 fantasy baseball post is Cano’s projections.

2. Ian Kinsler – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Uggla.  I call this tier, “Your last chance for a legit 2nd baseman.”  Let’s face it, legit’s overextending itself in that sentence.  One or more of these first six 2nd basemen are gonna Triple Lindy into an empty pool and it ain’t gonna be pretty.  Luckily, the difference between the first couple of 2nd basemen and the next couple really isn’t that big of a difference.  I.e., you can recover from one of these guys flopping.  I keep lowering your expectations because I really don’t trust Kinsler, but now that he’s a bit cheaper at drafts, I’m willing to give him a chance for a bounce back.  He’s gotta stay healthy one of these years, right?  How’s that for confidence!  2011 Projections:  85/22/60/.270/17

3. Brandon Phillips – He’s younger than Ryan Raburn.  That’s to say, Phillips seems like he’s been around forever, but he can still put up the 20/20 season.  Granted, everything went right last year for the Reds in 2010, even Marge Schott’s ghost didn’t say anything inappropriate to Jackie Robinson’s ghost.  Everything, except Brandon Phillips’ season.  His worst season since his rookie year back in 2003.  He was also battling injuries.  Through the injuries he still played in 155 games and put up a 18/16 season.  A modest bounce back and he’s a top 4 ranked 2nd baseman.  2011 Projections:  85/20/70/.270/17

4. Dustin Pedroia – The surgically-repaired left foot should be fine for the start of the season.  Until it’s not, of course.  No, it should.  I’m not too concerned with Pedroia.  Sparky Anklebiters don’t let little things like rust or injury rehab slow them down.  He’s basically the same as Philips fantasy value-wise.  A few more homers and steals with Phillips, a few more runs and average here.  If you want Pedroia 4th, I won’t hate.  2011 Projections:  105/15/65/.290/15

5. Dan Uggla – When Uggla was traded, I went over my Uggla fantasy.  It’s all there in 10 point Times New Roman.  The reason why he’s ranked below some of the guys above but his projections look as good if not better because A) Kinsler has the biggest upside.  B) Phillips and Pedroia are safer.  C) Uggla has the biggest downside in one category, he could hit .240.  D)  There’s no D.  2011 Projections:  90/32/100/.265/5

6. Rickie Weeks – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Figgins.  I call this tier, “Do you feel lucky?  Well, do you punk?”  Makes sense that there are two question marks in the tier name because all of these guys have question marks.  Before 2010, Weeks had the health of that Texas oil tycoon Anna Nicole married five years after he died.  Weeks used to call up Glass Chipper for doctor referrals.  His nickname was Sickie.  All that wouldn’t matter if Weeks wasn’t so talented.  He can repeat his power output from last year and add more steals if he’s healthy, but that “if” is the size of Gilbert Grape’s mom.  2011 Projections:  85/18/65/.250/14

7. Aaron Hill – I already threw an Aaron Hill sleeper post at you.  Go read up on that and come back and tell me what a dummkopf I am.  The reason why he’s in the “Feel lucky” tier and not the straight out excitement tier is because I’m being optimistic with Hill.  If he hits only 17 homers, then you’re gonna wanna become a mailman just so you can go postal.  2011 Projections:  80/25/85/.275/5

8. Ben Zobrist – Power really got pulled out from underneath Zobrist in 2010.  His HR/FB% went from a 17.4% in 2008, 17.5% in 2009 to 6.0% last year.  So if you believe the former numbers, he’s going to hit 20 homers again.  If you believe the latter number and assuming I’m using latter and former correctly, he’s going to barely crack 10 homers again.  Or just split the difference… 2011 Projections:  70/15/70/.260/15

9. Chase Utley – UPDATE:  Don’t draft Utley.  I still got love for you, Utley.  It’s just not the kind of love that finds its way on my fantasy team.  2011 Projections: 50/14/55/.280/5

10. Brian Roberts – He returned to decent numbers if you prorate them over a full year (59 games, 230 ABs, 4 homers, 12 steals).  Unfortunately, he’s now 33 years old and collecting back issues of Men’s Health.  Counting on Roberts to give you 155+ games and 30+ steals is being a tad bit optimistic.  2011 Projections:  80/7/45/.285/22

11. Chone Figgins – On one hand, I kinda hate Figgy.  On the other hand, I kinda despise Figgy.  On my third, lesser known hand, I think he’ll probably be more valuable than Brian Roberts.  Stupid irrational hate over a splash of confirmation bias.  You are a deadly cocktail!  2011 Projections:  80/3/40/.270/35

12. Ryan Raburn – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Beckham.  I call this tier, “I’m on board with these guys.”  I shouldn’t even have ranked Raburn because of his lack of 20 games at 2nd base, but I’m kinda totally in love with him.  Unfortunately, he only played in 18 games at 2nd base so he’s not eligible in all leagues.  I touched on him briefly already in a Raburn sleeper post.  Since the restraining order hadn’t gone through yet, that touching wasn’t prohibited by law.  Phew.  This fantasy shizz is serious!  This is the last year Raburn will be a sleeper.  Not because he’s going to breakout and be overvalued next year.  Well, that could be the reason.  Not because he’ll never come close to 20 games at 2nd base again.  Well, that could be the reason too.  But more likely because he’s going to be 30 years old in 2011.  He has 25 homer power.  At 2nd base, you shouldn’t need to know more.  If he doesn’t have 2nd base eligibility in your league, then ignore this blurb.  2011 Projections:  70/21/80/.275/3

13. Kelly Johnson – Member last year when he hit a few homers and I called him Kelly Kapowski?  The times we had!  I was kinda crazy about Johnson last preseason and he repaid the trust.  He also got a bit lucky.  He’s really not a 26 homer, .284 hitter.  Sorry, now don’t go running back to his family to tell them I said that.  He can still be productive.  Just a bit less so.  2011 Projections:  80/17/.260/60/12

14. Howie Kendrick – I like Posada for the first time ever and now I’m liking Kendrick.  Call an ambulance, you’re about to faint!  Kendrick still seems like a poor man’s Pedroia, but what the eff in the suckhole, there’s value in that.  Get on board, this train’s leaving!  BTW, Outside of deep leagues, you probably will grow hella bored with Kendrick.  A guy whose most exciting category is average can only excite you so much, unless you’re Wee Willie Keeler.  2011 Projections:  65/12/85/.305/15

15. Neil Walker – Aw, and you thought I forgot about Walker.  Reader, please!  Okay, now I’m going to pull back a bit, because I don’t fully trust Walker and his BABIP was on the lucky side and his walks weren’t great and his Ks weren’t either and he’s a Pirate and what does him being a Pirate have to do with anything and should I punctuate this sentence at some point?  Don’t get caught up in the hype. (Ha!  A Pirate hitter hyped?  Pfft.)  Walker is a decent late round flier, but don’t necessarily assume you guys are gonna be BFFs.  2011 Projections:  65/15/75/.260/7

16. Gordon Beckham – Since he’s only 24-years-old, I’m gonna have to overlook all the stress he caused me last year when he went from totally chic to totally geek.  He started to show signs in the 2nd half (in 171 ABs, 6 home runs and a .310 average).  Some continuation of that progress and he’ll outproduce his draft spot.  There’s still 15 homer power in his mollywhoppers and 10 steal speed in his gams.  2011 Projections:  70/15/60/.285/7

16 1/2. Placido Polanco – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until Uribe.  I call this tier, “Skip ‘em.”  There’s a point in every draft where you should just forgo a known commodity and cross your fingers and grab some upside.  This is the point.  I’ve never been a fan of Crapolanco.  If you didn’t know that, welcome to the site.  Click around, I get 1/40th of a penny for every page view.  Blogs make money!  (Note: Polanco got a half because he only has 12 games at 2nd base.)  2011 Projections:  80/8/60/.300/8

17. Martin Prado -  Keep in mind that I kinda wanted to drop Prado even further down this list, but at a certain point I’m risking my diploma from the College of Fantasy Baseball at Charleston.  Prado reminds me of Crapolanco without the speed.  Fongool to that.  2011 Projections:  85/12/60/.300/5

18. Ryan Theriot – His stats look nice at the end of the year, but I’ll make a $20 bet with you that in almost all mixed leagues, you will draft Theriot and want to drop him at the first sign of a slump.  Seriously, 20 steals over the course of the year looks okay in October.  When he’s giving you 3 steals per month, you want to kill someone.  2011 Projections:  60/2/30/.275/20

19. Mike Aviles – Last year was a career year and it wasn’t even that good.  Aviles is the new blech.  2011 Projections:  65/8/40/.295/8

20. Juan Uribe – He kinda has better numbers than quite a few of the guys above him, but I couldn’t stand to see Uribe any higher up on the list.  Here’s you drafting Uribe, “I’m smarter than everyone!  He has 20-plus homer power!  I’m going to win my league!”  Here’s you on April 3rd, “Grey, should I drop Uribe?”  Yeah, you should.  2011 Projections:  60/20/75/.240

After the top 20 for 2011 fantasy baseball, there’s a bunch of names, but these five stick out:

Danny Espinosa – This is a new tier.  This tier goes from here until the end.  I call this tier, “Fliers!  Or is it flyers?”  Figured I’d end the rankings on a positive note.  And by positive I mean relatively.  You’re pretty deep into a terrible position at this point. I already dropped a Danny Espinosa fantasy on your melon.  Since then, he’s had some hand troubles.  Not a great sign, but he’s a late flier worth taking for upside.  All projections in the flier tier are optimistic, but whatevs.  2011 Projections:  60/15/70/.245/17

Tsuyoshi Nishioka – I already popped my collar on a Tsuyoshi Nishioka fantasy post.  There were only three or four mildly offensive references in that post.  An off day, for sure.  Before you say, “Nishioka in the 10th round!” I say, “Kaz Matsui looked impressive in Japan too.”  2011 Projections:  80/5/45/.290/22

Sean Rodriguez – I already went over my Sean Rodriguez sleeper thing-a-ma-whosie.  Rodriguez will probably be a top 7 overall ranked 2nd baseman when the season is over.  Or he’ll be unownable and be dropped by April 5th.  It’s called a flier, people!   2011 Projections:  65/18/75/.245/20

Eric Patterson – Now that Adrian Gonzalez is (a) gone, there’s really no need to look at Padres hitters, except if you’re in a very deep league and you’re dying for some speed (junkie!).  In most leagues, I’d ignore Patterson.  (Note:  He only has 14 games at 2nd base.)  2011 Projections:  60/3/35/.250/20

Eric Young Jr. – Sure, Jose Lopez could steal time, but Young will get his ABs.  At least that’s what I keep telling myself.  I love Eric Young Jr.  I’ll probably talk about him some more before we drop the curtain on this preseason.  First, I really need to see how much playing time the Rockies are going to give him.  Second, who cares about the playing time?  It’s a last round flier that could pay dividends.  Do me a favor and draft him before I have a flippin’ conniption.  My freakin’ forehead vein is about to burst.  You can take an upside hit at middle infield a lot easier than at, say, 1st base.  Even if he only gets 350 ABs, he can get 40 steals.  Like Jeffrey Jones, give a Young man a twirl.  2011 Projections:  65/2/35/.255/40