Fantasy Baseball Advice

Carlos Beltran won’t play in day games following night games.  He won’t play in too many games in a row.  He won’t play in games where the other team’s starting pitcher’s last name ends in an N.  Here’s me playing the world’s smallest violin for everyone at Metco.  Since Beltran’s return, 1 homer and zero steals.  So he’s not running and he’s hitting for an empty average with little power.  There’s no crying in baseball and there’s no sentimentality in fantasy baseball.  If you’re holding onto your 2nd round pick because you held him this long already, well, you’ve held him too long.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Anibal Sanchez – 8 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks.  If Oliver Perez is the crazy girlfriend that you have hot passionate sex with but is afraid may stab you in the jugular in the middle of the night, then Anibal is her sister.  (If you followed that, give yourself a gold star.)

Dan Uggla – Hit his 30th homer yesterday as the Marlins rubbed their hands together thinking about who they were going to get for Uggla this offseason.

Joe Blanton – 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 9 Ks.  Threw a gem against the Marlins.  I overthought this one and… sonavabench!  Should’ve just started him.  (BTW, is overthought one word or two?  There I go again!)

Hiroki Kuroda – 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 6 Ks.  He was in the borderline starters post on Monday.  He’s a decent start on Sunday too.

Rafael Furcal – 4-for-5, 4 RBIs.  No one plays harder when you’re playing against a terrible team with a playoff spot sewn up.  No one.

Zach Duke – So this borderline starter didn’t work out quite as well.  You take Zach Duke to the cashier and she rings you up six innings and five earned runs.  That’s the price of playing sucky guys, I guess.

Trevor Cahill – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER.  And my final borderline starter for yesterday worked out okay as I finally learned to not bet against the A’s.

Andrew McCutchen – The Dread Pirate hit his 12th homer yesterday in 3/4 of a season.  *sipping tea with my pinkie out, crossing legs*  Do you dare draft The Dread Pirate and Robot Jones on the same fantasy team next year?

Edwin Encarnacion – 2 HRs, but whoa, turkey, guess what else?  He batted third.  Zoinks!

Brian McCann – Left the game with a bruised wrist, which is not nearly as delicious as a braised wrist.

Martin Prado – Now batting near .500 in the last week and the hits just keep coming as he went 2-for-4 yesterday.

Jorge de la Rosa – 2 1/3 IP, 6 ER as dlR pitched his worst start since June.  You’re killing me, Smalls!

Carlos Gonzalez – Pulled from the game with a tight hamstring.  Car(No)Go, as it were.

Huston Street – Came on in the 7th.  Yeah, he’s not the closer yet.

Franklin Morales – Got the save as he gave up three inherited runs and one of his own.  So, yeah, Street may be the closer again soon.

Brad Hawpe – Hit a homer yesterday.  If you would’ve told me he retired two months ago, I might’ve believed you.

Alex Rios – HR yesterday.  If you bet that Rios and Hawpe would hit a homer on the same day, that’s like Powerball money you just won.

John Danks – 6 IP, 7 ER.  Showing de la Rosa two can play the “I Hate My Fantasy Owners Game,” he had his worst start since May.   After the game, Danks tweeted, “I pitched.  #sucky”

Bobby Jenks – Probably done for the year with a calf injury (with his size you’d think they’d call it a cow).  Linebrink would probably step in for any saves.

Adam Dunn – Hit his 38th homer yesterday.  We have a week and a half for Dunn to hit two more homers or the world will explode.

Matt Cain – 2 1/3 IP, 7 ER.  Now really isn’t the time for that regression that every fantasy baseball ‘pert has been predicting since May.

Randy Wells – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 Ks.  According to Cubs fans, without Milton Bradley telling opposing hitters which pitches are coming, the Cubs are unstoppable.

Prince Fielder – Hit his 41st homer yesterday as he tied Pujols for the RBI lead with 129.  Going into the final weekend, if Prince is still neck-and-neck with Pujols, Albert should buy seats for Cecil Fielder right behind the Brewers dugout.  (For those in the back of the room, Cecil and Prince don’t get along.)  Devious Grey out.

Freddy Sanchez limped off the field with a knee injury.  Presumably, the same knee he’s been nursing since his days with Pittsburgh.  Without his services, the Giants probably would have still finished in third, but a game or two further out, so no regrets losing Alderson.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Barry Zito – 4 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 9 baserunners.  Baked Zito.

Ted Lilly – Scratched from his next start because of shoulder soreness.  Stop scratching him, and start fixing him!  You hold your breath waiting for him to return this year and you’re going to turn (Cubbie) blue.

Jose Reyes – Took batting practice yesterday.  Says he still wants to return.  Probably wants to check out the new Mets stadium.

Chase Headley – 5-for-6, HR yesterday.  Without looking it up, I’m gonna say this was his best game ever.  This might be his best week.  Even if he doesn’t play another game.  If you grabbed him for the short schedule day yesterday, you’re a genius.  They should bronze your brain.  I don’t know who they is, but you probably do, Brain Who Should Be Bronzed-ee.

Wade LeBlanc – 5 IP, 1 ER, 5 Ks.  This was, “The One Where He Pitches vs. the Pirates.”

Garrett Jones – Hit his 20th homer last night in his 269th AB.  He only has 38 Runs and 40 RBIs.  Yay, Pirates!

Heath Bell – Blew the save.  Unfortunately, Luke Gregerson wasn’t much better.

Matt Wieters – Didn’t do much yesterday, but he’s now batting third and he’s hitting around .450 in the last week.

Derek Lowe – 5 IP, 3 ER.  Blister problem might’ve caused his early exit, or maybe with the way he pitched vs. the Mets this year he just wanted out while the gettin’ was good.

Martin Prado – 3-for-4 and batting around .450 for the last week as Kelly Johnson was seen picking dirt out of his cleats.

Mike Cameron – 2 HRs yesterday to get to 21.  Someone, somewhere in March of next year is going to look at his final numbers and think, “Hey, maybe I should take Mike Cameron with my last outfield spot.”  You, hopefully, will mock them.

Derrek Lee – 3-for-4, 4 RBIs and a HR yesterday.  Beggars shouldn’t, uh, ya know, choose, but if only Lee would’ve also stole ten bases… Or five… Or one.   With his leg span, it’s like a five foot lead and seven steps away from the next base.

Tom Gorzelanny – 5 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 9 Ks.  He gets the Ain’ts next, but I’d stay away if your ratios are at all in danger or if you have a pacemaker.

Mark DeRosa – 2 HRs yesterday.  After only hitting one homer in August, these were his first homers in September.  Hits homers in bunches (and pairs, obviously).  Might have another two or three homers left in his bat for the remainder of the year.

Daniel Hudson – 5 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks.  You know that guy you see when you search for Tim Hudson on the waiver wire?  Here he is!  Great news, he has more than a K/IP in the minors.  Bad news, his control is iffy at times.  Just okay news, he’s worth a pick up in AL-Only or very deep keeper leagues because he should have the opportunity to impress next year.

Brian Fuentes – Got the save yesterday.  Scioscia might just be messing with you with the Jepsen thing, but Fuentes did kinda face lefties (Swisher, who’s weaker vs. lefties, Posada, who he walked, and Cano, who is a lefty).

Kevin Millwood – 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 2 Ks.  Still not really a guy I’d take a chance on in the final two weeks.

Nick Blackburn – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 Ks.  He gets the peasant Royals next time out, but he hasn’t been great against them this year.

Wandy Rodriguez – 5 IP, 6 ER.  It was almost like Fausto Carmona was ghost riding the Wandwagon last night.  Still, he has a sub-3 ERA on the year.  You don’t get mad at the Wandwagon.  He took you places and showed you things you never thought you’d see this year.

Chris Davis was sent to the minors last night to make room for Josh Hamilton.  In the preseason, Bill James’s projections for Chris Davis were 107/40/118/.302/8.  I thought that was a tad optimistic.  And “tad optimistic” there is like saying, “Hey, this Ben Affleck movie might be okay.”  Those predictions and the proceeding hype sent Davis’s ADP through the roof.  To the point where I decided to punt 3rd base in all of my drafts and take Mark Reynolds.  I went over why in this preseason post.  Now I’m not saying I wasn’t at fault either.  Back in December, I said Davis was a sleeper when he was going after Zimmerman, Huff and Atkins.  When the hype picked up, I backed off.  Though I did give Davis pretty generous preseason numbers too at 75/30/95/.275/3.  But I have a fantasy baseball blog; I’m not Bill James.  I think someone should ping Bill James (the kids say ping, ask one what it means) and say, “Hey, Bill, big fan.  Lots of great stuff through the years.  Sorry to ping you this late, but a few quick rhetorical questions.  Chris Davis?  Seriously?  Did you not follow the ruler across the paper correctly on Pujols’s name?”  In the Better News Dept., David Murphy should get more time now that Davis is gone as Blalock moves to first.  Though I’m not sure how long Blalock can stay healthy playing that demanding of a position.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Psyche! Before we get into today’s roundup, I just wanted to say we have an announcement coming later in the 2nd post of the day.  Around 11:30 AM PST.  Make sure to check back later.  Some of you might enjoy it.  While others may say, “Meh.”  Okay, now for the roundup:

Scott Hairston – Traded to the A’s.  Not sure there could be more of a lateral movement for Hairston’s value.  Unless you’re in an NL-Only league and you lose his services to the best available option off waivers.  Then again, maybe that’s lateral too. The Padres got Craig Italiano — I hear he makes a great chicken parm — and Ryan Webb, no relation to Brandon.  If you’re not following, the Padres traded away their number three hitter for the stuff you find under your couch.

Will Venable – Will see more ABs with Hairston out of town.  This could actually hurt Venable’s value.

Kyle Blanks – Rudy Gamble’s brother from the same mother could also see more time.  Be nice to see The Pillsbury Fro Boy do something other than strikeout.  As far as his fantasy value, we already filled in the *pinkie to mouth* Blanks.

Scott Downs – Should be back any day now.  As always, I’d hold Frasor for the time being until Downs has shown he’s healthy.

Chien-Ming Wang - Something’s Wang.  Hehe.  Hit the DL.  Peace out, Wang.  Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.

Ben Sheets – May not pitch this year.  No way!  C’mon!  Are you serious?  Crazy!

Dan Haren – 6 IP, 1 ER.  A good game and the Diamondbacks gave him runnage?  Wow.  Talk about a good day.  And I didn’t have any hodgepadres ruining my ERA yesterday.  Nice.

Joba Chamberlain – 3 2/3 IP, 3 ER and 8 unearned as he tied his owners to a WHIPing Post.  “Joba Rules” this year are a bunch of walks, unreliable from start to start no matter the matchup and unfulfilled promise.  Maybe that’s why he drinks and not, “Owen, you stupid poop!”

Ricky Nolasco – 8 IP, 0 ER, 12 Ks.  When I gave you the advice in mid-May to Buy Nolasco, I sure hope some of youse listened.

Derrek Lee – Another homer yesterday.  How dare you call me Lyle Overbay? But you kinda are just a rich man’s Lyle Overbay.  I’ll call you Thurston Overbay, the Third.

Jake Fox – HR yesterday.  Will be interesting to see how Sweet Lou flips the craft services table when Aramis returns today.

Randy Johnson – Left the game with a shoulder injury.  I foresee an abbreviated spring training comeback in 2010 and then he retires.

Rich Aurilla – HR yesterday.  I really thought he was retired.  I’m not even joking.  I’m not sure which is more despicable.  That Aurilla is holding the Giants hostage by not retiring or that the Giants don’t just release him.

Miguel Olivo – Hit his 13th homer.  Matt Wieters hit a homer too.  Natch!  Or is it reverse natch since I’m the one always cracking on his output?  Hmm… I got lost in my own natchs.

Grady Sizemore – 2 homers and one steal since his return as he bats .270.  Eh.

Cliff Lee – 6 IP, 3 ER.  Has a 3.45 ERA on the year.  That seems more in line with Lee than what we saw last year.

Gio Gonzalez – 6 IP, 2 ER. Doesn’t he sound like a haute couture jeans designer?  I wouldn’t bother with Gio Gonzalez in an 18-team league that only uses Oakland A’s players.

Adam Lind/Aaron Hill – Hit their 18th and 20th homers, respectively.  Lind bats .310 while Hill bats .299.  Still don’t see either as a sell high candidate, but that shizz is relative.  If you get the right deal, by all means.

Colby Rasmus – Hit his 10th homer as he bats .282.  Little late to the party now if you pick him up, but you could be doing a lot worst for your fourth or fifth outfielder.  I’m looking at you, Fred Lewis.

Chris Carpenter – 7 IP, 1 ER.  This is not to say Carp isn’t solid, but right now the Reds look like they’re facing the House Committee on Un-American Activities every time out.

Ross Ohlendorf – 5 IP, 5 ER.  Dorf!

Garrett Jones – Two Pirates mentioned in the same roundup.  Arghh, it’s raining doubloons!  Jones hit two homers in his last four games.  I don’t know where this schmohawk is headed, but right now he’s on one of my teams.  He may not last, but better to take the flier if you have room than to let someone else grab the hot rookie.  Remember, I gave you the same advice for The Dread Pirate about a month ago.  I’m still rocking him on one team. (He stole his 6th base yesterday as he bats .300).

Brandon Morrow – 6 IP, 3 ER, 7 Ks.  Finally, six innings!  I picked him up in a 12 team league last week, but haven’t start him yet.  I’ll start him now.

Martin Prado – 4-for-4 as he starts every day.  If you owned Kelly Johnson, then I’m sure the Cox yanking was suprisingly unpleasant, but Prado can ease your pain.

Derek Lowe – 5 1/3 IP, 4 ER.  Right now, he’s alternating between decent start and terrible.  Luckily, he gets the Rockies in Colorado next time out, so that’s an easy call to sit him.  Hopefully he’s back to a reliable starter after the ASB.

Jimmy Rollins – HR yesterday and is 7 for his last 15.  If he hits .400 over the next month, you’ll be glad you remained patient.

Joe Blanton – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 Ks.  He gets Pittsburgh next.  All aboard!

Nick Blackburn – 9 IP, 1 ER, 6 Ks.  With a name only one letter off from a porn star with chlamydia, it’s easy to stay away, right?  I look at it this way.  There’s so many pitchers each week that are potential spot starters, even in deep leagues, that I just don’t want any part of a guy that has 51 Ks in just over 116 innings.

Casey McGehee – 3-for-4 yesterday.  On Saturday, he went 4-for-5 with a homer.  Okay, this is the last I’m mentioning him.  Fo realz.

Vladimir Guerrero – Two days, two homers.  Was he prematurely shipped off to the glue factory?  I don’t think so.  I’d still be looking to sell him.  Now you might actually find someone who believes he still has some giddy-up left.  In related news, Brian Roberts still has twice as many homers as Vlad the ‘97 Impala.

Howie Kendrick – Recalled and stole a base yesterday.  Here’s what I said two weeks before Kendrick was sent down to the minors, “What do the Angels do with a 2nd baseman who has 18 homers in 179 ABs in Triple-A?  Promote him and demote Howie Kendrick?  Or do the Angels promote Rodriguez, demote Kendrick, wait two weeks until Kendrick starts hitting in the Coors-like PCL and then promote Kendrick right back and demote Rodriguez again like they’ve been doing with Brandon Wood for the last three years?”  And that’s me blowing your mind!  Let me answer 15 comments right off the bat — Beckham, McGehee, Prado, Everth then Kendrick, in that order.

Andre Ethier – HR yesterday.  See, preggers Manny doesn’t even need to be in the lineup for Ethier to start hitting.  I’m half-joking.  This year Ethier’s been better in the power department than I thought he’d be, but I don’t buy that he’s suddenly going to be the .400 hitter we saw in the 2nd half last year just because Manny’s back.

Mark Reynolds – HR yesterday.  What else is new?  If any of you are fifteen-years-old, don’t vote for him for the All-Star Game.  We want him to be mad in the 2nd half.  Adrian slept with Clubber mad.  Eye of the Tiger!  Oh, and if you’re fifteen, don’t listen to your parents.  You won’t need geometry.  Though you may need to know how to say, “I don’t know how a dead prostitute got in my bed,” in Spanish.

Gordon Beckham, the pride of Surrey, wrote little ol’ me a letter last week.  It went on for three pages and his penmanship left a lot to be desired, but let me share with you an excerpt.  “Hey, Grey, Gordo here.  I’m probably not going to be that great for an extended period of time in 2009.  But I appreciate you supporting my efforts.  Please share with your readers my plate disclipine and above-average speed.  I’m probably nothing more than a doubles hitter right now with the occasional dinger (the word dinger makes me giggle).  I don’t want to toot my own horn (though if I could, I’d never leave the clubhouse), but when you look at other MIs in your fantasy league, am I really that much worse?  As the President of the Debate Club, I once argued in favor of keeping Ben Grieve over Roy Halladay, so what do I know?”  Thanks, Gordo!  I think he covered everything.  At MI, ride the white lightning.  Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:

BUY

Casey McGehee – When I grow up, I wanna be just like Casey McGehee.  Be touted relentlessly by me and do just okay in the major leagues.  You wanna be fair?  Okay, let’s be fair.  McGehee is a serviceable MI.  He’s not winning you leagues.  But without serviceable MIs, our great sport wouldn’t be nearly as proud.

Martin Prado – I rank them Beckham, McGehee then Prado, in that order.  And that’s me figuring someone’s gonna ask me that in the comments!

Pat Burrell – You would think A) I actually like Burrell. B) He’s done something to warrant being included in back-to-back Buy/Sells. C) There’s no C.  D) Why would there be a D if there’s no C?

Marlon Byrd – He went 22/4/20/.393/2 last August.  When the weather heats up in Texas, the caged Byrd sings.

Chad Gaudin/Kevin Correia – This Hodgepadre of starters are worth owning and starting, at least, at home.

Jason Hammel – He’s the inverse of the Gaudin/Correia daily double.  Start him in Away games.

Dallas Braden – Hasn’t given up more than 2 earned runs in his last seven starts.

Ty Wigginton – Hit a homer two days ago. Exciting, right?  Now what if I told you he just played his fifth game at shortstop?  Ah, now your wheels are turning.

Garrett Jones – A Pirates has-been rookie? Please, Grey, I had Mexican for lunch. I know, random italicized voice.  Not all that attractive.  But in deep leagues, he’s worth a flier to see what he does with playing time.  He can’t be much worst than Delwyn Young.  But Delwyn Young sucks! That’s sorta my point.

Leo Nunez – Owned in 6.7% of ESPN leagues.  That means about 93.3% of ESPN leagues are abandoned.

SELL

Torii Hunter – He’s at 17/13.  He’ll get to 27/22.  My gratutity calculator is telling me if you own Hunter, you’ve gotten more production from him than you will if you continue to hold him. No one’s saying to sell him for Felipe Paulino and an old TV Guide cover with Kermit and Miss Piggy, but I’d explore options.

Daisuke Matsuzaka – Hey, he had a good run.  Not this year.  This year he was terrible.  He had a good run last year.  I wouldn’t own him this year with your team.  If you don’t have room on your DL, lose Dice-BB.

Glen Perkins – No one’s buying Perkins, so this is less a sell, more of an Ignore.  Can’t throw the speedball by anyone.  He could be a participant in my All-Star Game festivities where he faces off against Chris Davis.   The Movable Object vs. The Movable Object.  Whose flaw will be more pronounced?

Vladimir Guerrero – I know in the beginning of the year you Rochambeau’d your buddy to own Vlad, but Guerrero’s being outslugged by Scott Hairston by almost 200 points.  Oh, nuts, Vlad’s bad.  And not bad as in good, but bad as in bad.

It’s fitting that both the Nats and Pirates traded for a player with ‘Last’ in his name.  Lastings Milledge was sent to the Pirates along with Joel Hanrahananan for Nyjer Morgan and Sean Burnett.  Milledge and McCutchen can now share The Dread Pirate nickname.  How much of a slap in the face is it when you’re banished for being a problem child when Elijah Dukes is your teammate?  Is this a sign that the Nationals are no longer going to be the Home to Wayward 5-Tools Outfielders?   I can see Jim Bowden shedding a tear like he’s a 70’s era Native American watching his blessed land being desecrated.  Garrett Jones was called up, but he’s nothing more than a bench player.  Jones is an old prospect, which is different than an old prospector who says, “Aw, peaches!”  Joel Hanrahananan’s crizzap.  Been there, dropped him.  Nyjer Morgan showed up on a few Buy/Sells always as a Sell.  He ices my cockles, so to speak.  He’ll steal time from Dukes, who’s supposedly on the market too.  But last I looked, Dukes was stealing time from himself for hittin’ like he’s quittin’.  Burnett’s not going to really play into the picture for saves and, if he does, I wouldn’t own him, in the non-biblical sense.  Basically, what I’m saying is Avoid, Ignore, Ignore, Avoid.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Adrian Gonzalez – Left the game after sliding into third on a triple.  He didn’t immediately come out so that’s a good sign.  If he has to miss even a few games, any Padres opposing pitchers get an even bigger boost.

Eric Hinske – He was disappointed by lack of playing time with the Pirates.  A move to the Yanks should fix that real good.

Carlos Beltran – Good news from the Lilliputian doctor that performs micro-surgery.  Beltran should be back after the ASB.

Jake Peavy – Bad news as he’s expected to be out at least 6 more weeks.  I’d be shocked if we see him by September 1st.  Act accordingly.

Colby Rasmus – Sidelined with a hiatal hernia which he blames on late-night eating.  What on earth does someone eat to get a hernia? Rocky Mountain oysters?

Leo Nunez – Fredi said that the closer shituation is on a need basis, which means Meyer could still see some saves.

Edwin Encarnacion – Will return in about a week barring any setbacks. He’s worth stashing if you’re hurting at corner.  Could hit 5-7 homers a month the rest of the way.  Conservatively, I’d project him for 12/35/.250 if he stays healthy.

Dan Haren – 7 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks, 5 baserunners and he hit a homer.  Micah Owings gave him a standing ovation.

Jimmy Rollins – 0-for-5 as he filled in for Eric Bruntlett.

John Mayberry Jr. – 9-for-38 since his callup with 4 homers. After the game, Raul Ibanez accused him of steroids.

Shawn Estes – He said he is not retired from baseball.  He’s only retired from Triple-A.  Oh, okay.

Martin Prado – 4-for-5 as he filled in for Kelly Johnson who’s trying to recover from being awful.

John Smoltz – 4 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners.  He pitched fine, but was lifted during a rain delay.  No word yet who lifted him.  It’s probably safe to rule out Baldelli.

Jacoby Ellsbury – Hit a homer from the eight hole.  Lugo led off.  Maybe Francona’s been reading Torre’s tell-all.

Gordon Beckham – 3-for-4, and a homer.  He’s starring opposite Casey McGehee in, The Rise of the MI.

Cliff Lee – 3 IP, 7 ER.  I wonder if he was wearing a 2007 throwback jersey.

Chris Woodward – Got the start at third in Beltre’s absence.  Good to see the Mariners looking towards the future starting their 33-year-old journeyman.

Brandon Morrow – 4 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 10 baserunners.  No!  You were supposed to throw 6 innings this time out.  Oh, well.  Two steps forward, one step back.

Willy Aybar – 3-for-5 with his 7th homer and batted third.  He’s the Aybar that can help you in AL-Only leagues.

Sean West – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER.  You want all the excitement owning rookie pitchers, here’s the other side of that coin.  He now has a 26:21 K to Walk ratio.  I ran my ultraviolet light over my bed sheets and it read, “Blech.”

Jorge Cantu – 3-for-4 yesterday and .323 in the last week.  Is that light at the end of the tunnel?

Prince Fielder – Hit his twentieth homer yesterday and now has 74 RBIs.  Where’s the love for the big man?  Does he need to go to rehab to be appreciated?  He kicked meat.  For a 400 pound man that should be enough.

Marlon Byrd – 2-for-5, 5 RBIs and two homers as he batted third.  What’s this, Ron Washington taking cues from Leyland?  Whoever’s nearest to the water cooler gets to bat third?  Bee tee dubya, Hamilton will be back this weekend so Washington can take the names out of the hat when filling out the lineup card.

Elvis Andrus – 4 steals yesterday.  With only 11 steals coming into the game, Andrus was a bit of a disappointment in the steals department so far, but if he can get to 35 on the year, he’ll definitely be worth owning.

Scott Baker – 5 IP, 1 ER, 1 K, only 7 baserunners and somehow threw 111 pitches.  I’m guessing lots of souvenirs into the stands.  He hasn’t had a terrible start since the end of May.  Definitely should be starting him every time out.

Albert Pujols – Has 30 homers with a .233 hitter behind him, followed by the skinnier of The Flying Molina Bros.

Mark DeRosa – Hurt his wrist and had to leave the game.  Hopefully this will drive down the FAAB price on him in Rudy’s NL-Only league.  Rudy’s bidding $751 if anyone from other blogs reads this.

Fernando Rodney – 1 IP, 2 ER.  One day Donkey-corn, next day Kazaam!  (This reminds me of something.  I was in the middle of writing a roundup one night and I wrote something similar to, “One day Donkey-corn, next day Kazaam,” and I started thinking about the people who stumble across Razzball and think they are reading absolute gibberish.  That’s all, just thought I’d share that thought.)

Jason Marquis – Threw a two-hitter vs. the Dodgers.  In other news, water is dry.