First off, Jose Iglesias is gone. The less intelligent Red Sox fan screams bloody murder like Schilling’s sock, “But Julio Iglesias was batting .400 after ten games about two weeks ago! His name’s Julio, right? RIGHT?!” The intelligent Sawx fan screams, “Does this mean Xander Bogaerts is coming up?!” The drunk Sawx fan screams, “We’re fine with this trade no mahder what ‘cuz Jackie Bradley Jr. wok’d three times in his first game! I need more Sammy A!” The Sawx fan who doesn’t play fantasy says, “Um, what about Jake Peavy?” The Sawx fan who does play fantasy says, “His value doesn’t change with this trade, maybe a few more wins.” The drunk Sawx fan butts in, “I’m going to the packie, you wahnt anything?” The less intelligent Red Sox fan says, “I’ll take a packie of Pahl Mahls.” Then the drunk Sawx fan shakes his head, “Yah more stoned than Robert Parrish.” Then Will Middlebrooks says, “Hey, I could get called up instead of Bogaerts.” Then all the Sawx fans in unison say, “Shaddup!” So, Iglesias goes to the Tigers, which is a solid landing spot for him. He’s known for his defense, which puts his fantasy value at slim to anorexic, unless you have a Web Gems category in your league. He’ll act as insurance for when the steroid hammer drops on Jhonny Peralta. Avisail Garcia goes to the White Sox, and he’s a light hitting corner outfielder who will probably take over once Rios is moved. Bogaerts or Middlebrooks will take over shortly (or third basely) and I stashed Bogaerts immediately when I heard this trade go down. Finally, Peavy is who he is as the Sawx fan pointed out above. He doesn’t have substantial innings in Fenway in his career, but that doesn’t matter because they would’ve been against the Sawx. He’s a terrific addition in real life for Boston, but he’s a 3.70-ish, 8+ K-rate starter for fantasy, which is around a fantasy number three. Jake Peavy will definitely do better than Jack Pervy, who Rudy and I went to school with in Boston. He used to hang out with someone we named Tim Wackfield and you can imagine how we mangled Keith Foulke’s name. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
So with a continuation from previous post about fantasy baseball middle relievers today will be the senior circuit and the National League. I personally tend to notice that it is easier to stream or pick up relievers from the NL because of the way they substitute pitchers in games more frequently.Please, blog, may I have some more?
As I awake from my winter hibernation where dreams of twins named Thompson abounded, I realize the time is neigh to learn you all about the potential holds fantasy standouts for the upcoming year. Anyone that knows me knows I love relief pitching, come into my apartment you will see embroidered pillows with my favorite relievers over the years stitched in effigy.Please, blog, may I have some more?
This is it, fellas and three girl readers. The last train is leaving the station. The giddy has just about got up and went. It’s your last chance and I’d throw every single pitcher, not just the ones I have listed here if it meant the difference in my league. You need to do what you do. The line for last week was 3.50 ERA, 1.19 WHIP, 108 Ks and 6 Wins in 153 2/3 IP. To recap, these aren’t guys I’d drop anyone worthwhile to get, these starters are meant for streaming purposes and all of their ownership in ESPN is under 50%. These streamers are in no particular order. Also, in the final days of the season, managers juggle their lineups more, so there’s no guarantee all of these guys are listed on the right day. Anyway, here’s some borderline starters for this week in fantasy baseball:
Friday, October 1st
Fausto Carmona – I’ve been recommending for a few weeks in a row now. Like Carmona, huh, Grey? Answer, man! What, too italicized for you?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Miguel Cabrera rolled his ankle the hard way, didn’t make his point and was immediately lifted from the game to have x-rays taken. I have some back-of-a-comic-book x-ray glasses, but I wasn’t wearing them when it happened. I’m only one man! It looked pretty serious. My mom was right, I could’ve been a doctor. There’s a whole lot more zeroes in blogging. Though that’s not zeroes as in money. X-rays said it was a sprained ankle, should be more news about how many games he’ll miss. I’m guessing quite a few. In other words, it ain’t good. In other other words, make other plans. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Martin Prado – Left the game with an injury to his left hip pointer. That’s gonna make it hard for his sales presentation on Friday. I’m guessing he’s done for the year. If you wanna guess he’s not, then we’ll put my guess and your guess in the squared circle and let them duke it out.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Some rejected titles were, “It’s A Not-So-Wonderful Elbow, Andrew Bailey,” “Old Man Potter Gets The Last Laugh” and “Won’t You Come Home, Andrew Bailey? Won’t You Come Home?” but when presented with a Party of Five reference, I turn to mush. If you can wash Po5 out of your hair, you’re a better man than me. Andrew Bailey is heading off to see Dr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Okay, I’m officially in love. ‘Grey hearts Jeremy Hellickson‘ is going all over the Trapper Keeper. I’m going to put a paper bag on my Science book and decorate it with Hellickson pictures I find off the internet. Then if someone says something, I’m going to punch them in their big, fat mouth. Then while in detention, I’m going to write a song for Jeremy Hellickson and I’m going to get my friends band, The Quadratics, to perform the song at the Sadie Hawkins Dance. That’s what I’m going to do. His line yesterday 7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks in only 86 pitches. His line last time nearly as good. His line tomorrow? The moon! Though he’s not pitching tomorrow, but, if he were, he’d have the moon. I’d grab Hellickson in all leagues. He has a nice K-rate and solid control. A terrific combo. Could he go out next time and roofie you? There’s always that chance, but his next start is the Rangers at home and they’re not exactly road scholars. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Dan Johnson – 0-for-1, 4 BBs. He has 3 hits and 11 walks since his call up last week. He has a .176 average and a .483 OBP. He’s the one true outcome hitter.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Pedro Alvarez went 3-for-5 with 2 homers. Had his 2nd two homer game in two days. Say that fast 117 times! LMFAO should be playing when Alvarez goes into the batter’s box, “Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot!” (I wish I wrote that song.) Alvarez is 23 years old. For those who can’t read between the lines, he’s going to get better!!! (Second and third exclamation marks were for emphasis, not because my keyboard’s keys are sticking.) Who knew the only thing the Pirates offense needed was to lose their best hitter? Maybe the Mariners should lock Ichiro in a closet for a few games. This is Ichiro going into the closet, “Hey, Beltran, what are you doing here?” I keed. So what can we expect of Alvarez the rest of the season. Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Or 12 homers and a terrible average. He’s still K’ing too much. I’d absolutely pick him up in every league just for the chance he keeps hitting bombs. I would not drop anyone that I might regret. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Ty Wigginton – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer in two days. Casey McGehee’s Dad is historically a streaky hitter and a 2nd half hitter. Also, the Phillies, Rangers and Yankees are talking about acquiring Wiggy. Not all of those teams would be a boost to his value, but if I had to take a guess, I’d say Wigginton will be in Friday’s Buy/Sell.Please, blog, may I have some more?
In the clubhouse after last night’s game, the Nats watched as ESPN reported Strasburg wasn’t pitching until Friday so there was nothing to talk about. Nothing to say about Adam Dunn. Nothing to say about that Zimmerman guy. Josh Will-something… They couldn’t even remember his name. The team stopped watching the highlights, upset they were nothing but Anthony Edwards to Strasburg’s Clooney. Knowing something had to be done, Dunn left the clubhouse as he always had – by reaching up, removing the ceiling and climbing out. Then he jumped on the back of a blue ox and circled the globe until time rewound to before the game. Dunn then went out and hit his 18th, 19th and 20th homers while rocking a .280 average on the year. Now after the game, ESPN reported Dunn hit 3 homers, specifying it came just two days prior to Strasburg’s next start. Dunn shrugged, it was a start as he ripped the blue ox’s leg off and had dinner. Hee-haw! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Ian Desmond – 1-for-2 with his 2nd homer in as many games. Now has 6 homers and 6 steals on the year. Ever heard of the slow boat to China? Yeah, Desmond’s on the slow boat to 12/12.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Huston Street has stopped throwing due to shoulder soreness. In other news, taco diarrhea burns. I picture Street getting together every offseason with ex-A’s teammate, Rich Harden. They go on a hike to Brokenback Mountain, where they enjoy the outdoors for 5 minutes until one of them pulls up lame. Franklin Morales is the closer now and could be for the foreseeable future. He’ll hold the reins until at least mid-May, according to the Rockies. I’d put the over/under for Street’s reemergence at June 15th. Anyway, here’s what else is going on in fantasy baseball:
Psyche! Before we get into the roundup, Rudy asked me to announce there’s 3 spots left open in the last Fantasy Razzball league. Draft is this Sunday. It’s the league where you vie for the worst possible team and you can win a hot tub. That might help getting away from the dinner table on Easter. Details are here. Email rudy [at] razzball.com if you want in. Okay, back to the festivities.Please, blog, may I have some more?