These are the leading hitters in the major leagues for April. Do I think every hitter does the same thing every year? No, I don’t. But hitters do tend to follow patterns. If these players were good in April last year, there’s at least a chance they will be good this year. Also, as I went over in this spring training stats post, just because a hitter isn’t hitting in March doesn’t preclude a big April. Anyway, here’s some top fantasy baseball hitters for the month of April:
Adrian Gonzalez – 22 homers pre-ASB in 2008, 24 homers in 2009, 18 homers in 2010. Just wait until A-Gon starts getting crap in September and October for not being “clutch.” Yeah, I put douchey quotes around a word, sue me.
Jorge Cantu – Was good for power the last two Aprils. Was not good in any other month. That’s Was (Not Was) for you crazy 80′s kids.
Bobby Abreu – As I went over the hitters that did well in April, there were quite a few that A) Did not do well the rest of the season and B) Are older guys that obviously tire as the season progresses and C) There’s no C.
Torii Hunter – See above, not C.
Alfonso Soriano – Has been better in the first half the last couple of years. (Couple is a sneaky way of saying two, yet making it seem like it’s more than two. Girlfriend, “How many dollars did you leave on that thirty dollar bill?” You, “A couple.”)
Justin Morneau – April’s been historically his 2nd best month after May. He’s Te(i)x’s other half.
Pablo Sandoval – I forgot he hit well last April (.368, 3 homers). Probably because he did so well trying to erase any memory of it with his next five months.
Brad Hawpe – Has always been a 1st half hitter. Let’s see it in San Diego though where he might not be *pinkie to mouth* Hawpy.
Ryan Theriot – In April 2009, .317, 5 steals. Last year in April, .337 and 5 steals. Knowing La Russa, a good April in the leadoff spot this year for Theriot could cement him in that spot for the whole year.
Kosuke Fukudome – 4 homers, .338 in April of 2009; 5 homers, .344 last year in April. But then he says Fuk u to May!
Jake Peavy was walking off the field before the trainers even got to him. On a scale of bad signs, that’s around a 9. That’s on a scale of 1 to 8. The good news is it’s not his arm. It’s his dorsi muscle. Peavy’s a dolphin? Put down your noisemakers, it’s not that good of news. To paraphrase Ludacris, “Peavy back bad, Peavy not good… Peavy back don’t do stuff that yo’ back do… (Repeat chorus 17 times.)” Daniel Hudson, rocking a 3.47 ERA in a hitters’ park in the minors, could get the call if Peavy needs a DL stint. You know that guy you see when you search for Tim Hudson on the waiver wire? That’s him! He has more than a K/IP in the minors, though his control is iffy at times. He’s worth a pick up in AL-Only or deep mixed keeper leagues. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Aaron Harang – Headed to the DL with back spasms. Dusty said, “If he dies, he dies,” while wrapped in a Reds flag.
Yovani Gallardo – To the DL with an oblique strain. Won’t be back until the end of the month as YoGa tries to get stretched out. Namaste.
Brad Penny – I faintly remember him pitching this year. He was good, wasn’t he? He was shut down during a simulated game, experiencing more soreness. Can’t Dave Duncan rub his hands together and touch the pain?
Felipe Lopez – 2-for-5 with a homer as he hits near .450 in the last week. Or “For Fiddy,” if you’re sending a care package to the G-Unit.
Ryan Franklin – 1/3 IP, 6 ER. Ouch… Wait, what? Oh. Ow.
Edwin Encarnacion – 3-for-4 with a homer. All he does is hit (when he’s first called up then disappears into oblivion).
Delmon Young – 3-for-3. Now hitting over .400 in July after a .320 June. Know what would be nice? If he were batting higher than 8th.
Carl Pavano – 6 1/3 IP, 6 ER, 8 baserunners, 2 Ks. That, sir, is no line from a man with a mustache. Shave immediately!
Joe Mauer – 1-for-4 with his 4th homer. His homer totals from 2005 to 2009 were: 9, 13, 7, 9, 28. Does one number look off? Yeah, well how come you didn’t listen when February Grey told you that?
Clayton Richard – 6 IP, 5 ER, 13 baserunners, 6 Ks. Thursday’s afternoon post was going to be about how Clay-T Richard, along with a bunch of other SPs, were pitching over their head. Consider this a preview.
Mat Latos – Here’s Bud Black for the last three months. Latos won’t be limited, won’t be limited, won’t be limited, then yesterday he said he’d probably be limited.
Ryan Zimmerman – 3-for-4 with 2 homers after he took the better part of June off. I missed your touch, Black Keys.
Jayson Nix – Hit his 4th homer in the last four games. If you’re struggling to catch a spark at MI, I’d grab Nix and ride the heat.
Johan Santana – 9 IP, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks and a homer. This year Johan has one homer every 30 ABs. Jason Bay has a homer every 50 ABs. Cust kayin’.
Jose Reyes – 2-for-4 as he returned to action. He was running hard, not favoring any side (back?) pain.
Matt Diaz – 3-for-5. It’s Dye-as. Lefty killer. Anyone who’s read this site for a long time knows that I’ve always liked Diaz as a platoon outfielder. (Play him against his strong side, sit vs. weak side. Rinse, repeat.)
Wandy Rodriguez – 7 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 10 Ks. For a while, it was touch and go while it looked like Brian Moehler was ghost riding the Wandwagon, but now it looks like he’s back.
Carlos Lee – Hit a homer yesterday along with Lance Berkman. Must’ve been throwback night at The Juicebox. Did Jeff Bagwell throw out the first pitch underhanded because of a hurt shoulder?
Jeff Niemann – 6 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks. He shouldn’t be pitching this well. If you’ve heard that before, it’s because I’ve written it before.
Kosuke Fukudome – Hit his 2nd homer in 2 games. Here’s what I wrote yesterday, “…he gets crazy hot for a week or two at a time.” And that’s me copying and pasting me!
Aramis Ramirez – 2-for-4, 4 RBIs and 2 homers. Too bad anyone in their right mind has either dropped or benched him by now.
Aaron Heilman – 1 IP, 2 ER. I’d say Kazaam!, but Kirk Gibson went into a press conference the other day fist pumping and said, “I have no idea who the closer is. Maybe it’s Qualls, maybe it’s that lady in the front row of all the games that had me sign her breast. These things haven’t been decided yet.” I think Qualls gets first look, then Front Row Lady.
Alex Rodriguez – 2-for-3 with 2 homers. On pace for 120 RBIs, less than 30 homers and like no steals. Feels like he still hasn’t had one crazy hot streak, so he can easily bump up his numbers to 35 homers and 10 steals. In other words, same shizz, different year.
Jose Guillen – Left the game with an injury, probably will head to the DL. Maybe the Royals can now trade him for Mike Jacobs.
Wilson Betemit – 3-for-4 and his 4th homer in 19 games. The Royals are playing him, as they should. You should consider it too.
Jhoulys Chacin – 3 IP, 4 ER in middle relief as he makes room for de la Rosa, who’s due back this Friday. In NL-Only leagues and deep keepers, I’d hold Yo-lease with his nasty K/9.
Chris Iannetta – Now has 3 homers in his last six games. Unfortunately, those six games are separated by 11 days. From the files of Sad, But True: Iannetta has only one less homer than Wieters.
Seth Smith – 3-for-4 with his 12th homer. Putting together a nice year as long as you sit him vs. lefties. Ooh, I know! Trade Matt Diaz to the Rockies and let him platoon with Smith.
Matt Kemp – 2-for-5 with a home run and two steals. Or as it’s more commonly known, a slam & legs.
Alex Rios – 1-for-3 with a home run. I told you to sell him at the very end of May. In June, 2 homers and 5 steals with a .297 average. In July, 1 homer and 1 steal with a .176 average. So 3 homers and 6 steals with a .280 average. I think we can agree there’s guys with less name value giving you the same.
Madison Bumgarner – 8 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks vs. the Brewers who have only scored three runs in the last three games. Mad-Bum’s pitching better than I thought he would. I’d absolutely grab him in mixed leagues, but you run the risk of getting roofied at any point.
Miguel Cabrera – Hit his 21st homer as he took a late hit off The Sauce. Alfredo, that is.
Armando Galarraga – Sent to the minors. I wonder if he’ll drive his Corvette.
Felix Pie – 2-for-6 in his return to the lineup. So what’s to like about Pie? Well, the weird guy in the overalls at The Home Depot is not the only one who’s toolsy. Pie is a speed and power combo guy. He’s just not quite that powerful or that, um, speedful. In AL-Only and deep mixed leagues, I’d take a flyer.
Chris Tillman – Should replace the DL’d Millwood. Tillman started 4 games earlier this year and gave up 14 earned runs in 15 innings with his worst start coming in San Fran. I wouldn’t pick up Tillman with your team.
Nick Markakis – 5 HRs, 2 SBs on the year. Evidently, he’s a hypochondriakakis and gleaned from Luke Scott and Brian Roberts that hitting HRs and stealing bases leads to injuries.
Kevin Youkilis – Left the game with ankle pain after clearing the plate with his foot. The last Red Sox that got hurt clearing the plate was Sam Horn who pulled his abdomen partaking in a pie-eating contest.
Mike Pelfrey went from totally chic to totally geek in the matter of 4 starts. Last night, he dropped a 4 2/3 IP, 7 ER bomb and now he’s staring at nickels. Pardon the wavy lines as we jump in The Way Back Machine and see what I said in April, “His K-rate prior to 2010 was pretty poor. Even this year, it’s only a little above his career mark. His biggest adjustment so far seems to be his ability to avoid the homer ball and leave men on base. He can be usable as a 4th fantasy starter, especially in Metco.” And that’s me copying and pasting me! Nothing’s really changed other than he’s no longer leaving men on base, his homers have gone up (literally) and his lack of Ks are catching up to him. Hmm… Maybe some stuff has changed. He had a 1.98 ERA at Metco prior to last night, so that’s still a nice matchup start, but Pelfrey is no longer a must own. At 109 IP on the year and only 67 Ks, he’s a notch below Jon Garland in K-rate. I just popped a zit in the mirror and spelled out, “You can probably do better than Pelfrey.” Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jose Reyes – Supposed to return on Tuesday. I really want to believe this, but the Met doctors are a joke. Did they go to that med school Steve Guttenberg went in Bad Medicine?
Shin-Soo Choo – Thumb-Soo Blue now might need surgery and could be out for the season. Is this all a ploy for him to avoid his army service time? We must have a commenter in Canada who could take him in. Volunteers?
Mike Gonzalez – Won’t return until after the All-Star break. As previously mentioned, Alfredo will continue to get saves now and when Mike G. first returns. From there, I imagine names will go into Juan Samuel’s hat and he’ll pull one out. Hey, New ERA’s now the closer! Um, that’s the tag.
Jake Fox – 3-for-5 and now has 2 homers in his last two starts. Not starting every day, but I’d grab him now in AL-Only leagues and watch closely how his playing time shakes out for mixed leagues. Hey, New ERA’s now starting at 1st base! Still the tag, Juan.
Chase Utley – Saying he won’t need the full 8 weeks of recovery time. I believe Utley can return early. Still, a hand issue that won’t have him on the field until late-August isn’t something you should go out of your way to acquire.
Roy Halladay – 9 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 7 Ks vs. the Braves. It’s one thing to face Halladay, but I can’t even imagine how difficult it must’ve been for the Braves with Russia still occupying Georgia.
Cliff Lee – Supposedly, the Phillies were scouting The Adverb. I wonder if the scout went to Vegas, got himself a hooker and some blow while pretending to scout Cliff Lee because HE WAS JUST ON THEIR TEAM! Whoa, Cap’n Caps, easy. SORRY.
Russell Branyan – Now has three homers since joining the Mariners. Had 31 homers last year and has 13 now. You do the math!
Jose Valverde – 1 IP, 2 ER, Kazaam!
Jonathan Sanchez – 6 IP, 1 ER, 11 baserunners, 6 Ks. Man, that WHIP is messy. What a slob! No wonder he goes by Filthy Sanchez. According to me. But we’ll pretend he goes by that on every site on the interwebs.
Pablo Sandoval – 1-for-4 and batting .269. Maybe he’s uncomfortable carrying around those extra 75 pounds. Let’s get him and the Sandovals on Losing It With Jillian. I’d love to see Sandoval’s family all try to lose weight together. “Mama, did you put extra mayonnaise on my lard sandwich?” Mama Sandoval looks guilty then, “No.”
Buster Posey - 2-for-4 with his third homer. All he does is hit homers (once a week).
Tom Gorzelanny – 5 IP, 3 ER, 11 baserunners, 4 Ks. I’ve seen better starts, but let’s be clear about something. Gorzelanny isn’t an ace. He’s a number five fantasy starter. He still has a 3.31 ERA on the year and is worth starting in favorable matchups.
Ian Kennedy – 5 2/3 IP, 7 ER, 9 baserunners, 6 Ks. Member when I said to lose him in last week’s Buy/Sell? Yup.
Adam LaRoche – Hit his 13th homer yesterday in the Diamondbacks’ 83rd game. LaRoche meet 2nd half of the 162 game schedule, 2nd half say wassup to LaRoche.
Krispie Young – 2-for-3, 2 steals while hitting leadoff. Now has 15 homers and 16 steals on the year. Yeah, Krispie’s been better than your other outfielders. Yup, even that one.
Kosuke Fukudome – 2-for-3 and his 7th homer. Keep in mind his playing time is very iffy right now but he gets crazy hot for a week or two at a time. This game might’ve be the start of something. Either way, the choice is yours. Doo, da, dippity.
Geovany Soto – 3-for-4, 2 Runs and 2 RBIs. Somehow the Cubs pulled out the win with Koyie Hill on the bench.
Alexei Ramirez – Now has two homers in two games while hitting over .400 in the last week. Definitely worth owning though I’m not sure where his steals have been this year. Did they have visa issues?
Carlos Quentin – Hit 2 homers yesterday. Frequent commenter, Steve, summed up the thoughts of current Quentin owners yesterday when he said, “Oh, Quentin, I am so glad I drafted you/dropped you/picked you up/dropped you again/picked you back up.”
Gavin Floyd – 7 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 4 Ks. Hasn’t allowed more than 2 runs in a start in over a month. Yeah, you should own him.
Bobby Jenks – Pitched in the 8th inning of 7-1 game. I know what you’re thinking, “What’s Ozzie thinking?” Good question. Ozzie supposedly wants Jenks to get some action before being the closer again because he was away on bereavement leave. And Ozzie wants to confuse fantasy owners. That too. I’d grab Thornton if he’s available.
Dayan Viciedo – Hit his first major league homer. Worth monitoring in AL-Only leagues (as if you don’t have enough to do!), but his playing time has been sporadic.
Mark Teixeira – Hit his 14th homer yesterday. PABST (Post All-Star Break Stats Teixeira) getting a jump on the All-Star break so I guess this was a premature jacking.
Jayson Nix – 2 homers in yesterday’s game. Jaymes Nix got drunk and called Laynce to ask him how come he can’t be more like Jayson.
Matt Garza – 3 IP, 4 ER, 9 baserunners, 1 K. Of course I sat Garza when he pitched well last week in Fenway and started him yesterday for this crizzap at home. Of course, I did! When I yell obscenities at telemarketers, I call them Garza.
Eric Patterson – 2 homers and now has 6 homers on the year. Not quite as bonkers as it sounds… Okay, it’s a little bonkers, but he hit 14 homers in Triple-A one year and 12 homers in Triple-A last year. For those desperate for anything at MI, you could probably do worse.
Matt LaPorta – LaPo hit another homer yesterday then was removed with a head bruise from his collision with Andrus. After the bump on the head, LaPorta thought he was Ginger from Gilligan’s Island.
Joey Votto – Hit 2 homers. Yeah, but Omar Infante can play 4 positions.
Erik Bedard – Was due to pitch on Tuesday, but he’s dealing with a stiff shoulder. We’re actually lucky this happened. If Bedard came back while Ben Sheets was healthy, that would’ve caused a major shift in the Time VORP Continuum.
Making Eric Young Jr.’s return possible, Brad Hawpe heads to the 15-day DL as he loses his hop. In the last four years of the minors, Eric Young Jr. has 87, 73, 46 and 58 steals, respectively. Or disrespectfully, holy effin’ hey, are you kidding me? That’s so good, Rickey Henderson talks about Eric Young Jr. in the third person. Young could play in the outfield for a few days and will occasionally spell Barmes — B-A-R-M-E-S. I think Young will see four to five days a week, but for those needing steals, you know the drill. I grabbed him in one league and dropped Priscilla Barmes. (How awesome would it be if DeWitt played on the same team as Barmes? Then Todd Helton would have to pretend he was gay to get playing time.) Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Miguel Olivo – Now leads all catchers with 5 homers. Ain’t that a nicker in the kads.
Seth Smith – 2 homers yesterday. Sure, go and get hot right when Eric Young Jr. gets called up. Smith will see extra starts with Hawpe out, but he’ll still sit vs. lefties, which the Rockies get two of this week.
Chad Billingsley – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks and only one walk that wasn’t intentional in his last two games. Right now, his FIP is over a run below his ERA. I don’t think we’re out of the woods completely, but his next start vs. the Pirates can’t hurt.
Manny Ramirez – Hits the DL. Garrett Anderson filled in for him yesterday. Manny’s birthday is 5/30/72. Garrett Anderson’s birthday is 6/30/72. Nice that the Dodgers can fill Manny’s spot with youth.
Ryan Zimmerman – Wants to avoid the DL, but is still having moans over his hammy.
Scott Olsen – 7 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks. Keep moving, nothing to see here.
Kelly Johnson – Hit his 7th homer yesterday. No, that’s not a typo. Aren’t you glad you drafted Aaron Hill in the 5th round?
Mark Reynolds – 3-for-5, 4 RBIs as he hit his 7th homer too. Sure, I wrote a schmohawk post about Reynolds, but you can’t stay mad at a Mini Donkey. They’re too lovable.
Krispie Young – 7 for his last 13. If you’re hoping for the breakout, you have to accept that there will be stretches of 0-for-22′s.
Chad Qualls – After he completed his 1-2-3 save, his owners threw their gloves into the air and fell to their knees like Jesse Orosco.
Ryan Doumit – Going into the game, the Astros had stolen 6 bases. Now, the Astros have 12 steals. 4 were stolen off of Morton and Doumit. Which is also known as *pinkie to mouth* a salt and battery.
David Price – 9 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 9 Ks. There ya go.
John Jaso – 2-for-3, 2 RBIs. Anyone see this guy’s name in the box score and think there’s a typo? Maybe it’s just me. So get out your revolver, because it’s time for another round of Catcher Russian Roulette. Jaso sported a solid OBP in the minors and pretty limited power. So far, he has 5 walks, only one strikeout and a homer. He’s immediately more valuable than Dioner, but that’s like saying your feet smell better than your socks. In AL-Only leagues or deep mixed, 2 catcher leagues, I’d grab him and see if he can keep up his hot hitting.
Colby Lewis – 6 1/3 IP, 4 ER, 9 baserunners, 10 Ks as he battled for the Win. Colby’s a Survivor! I feel bad penalizing the people who are paying attention for the ones that aren’t, but here’s what I said previously about Lewis, “No one’s career has seen a bigger boost after going to Japan since Cheap Trick. Feels like every year the Rangers have someone who’s way overhyped. Has everyone forgotten that Lewis had a 6.71 ERA in his major league career before being rejuvenated in the Japanese Bubbling Spring of Soba Noodles?” And that’s me quoting me! I also went on to talk about how I like strikeout pitchers, but Colby Lewis is prone to walks and his home park is hitter-friendly. And that’s me paraphrasing me! On certain teams, I could see grabbing Colby Lewis if you need Ks or upside. I do not own Colby Lewis anywhere and don’t plan on it. I also don’t like how his name only sounds right if you say the whole thing. Really slows things up for someone whose WPM is 17.
Brennan Boesch – 0-for-4 as he hit 5th. Well, with Guillen out of the lineup it’s only natural that Leyland, who doesn’t believe in new lineup cards or Liquid Paper, would hit Boesch 5th. (BTW, Poor Ryan Raburn. Him and every prospect Scioscia ignored for an Izturii should start a support group.) Boesch has 20 homer power and decent speed, but there’s no indication that he’ll stick once Guillen returns. He also likes to swing and miss. In AL-Only leagues, I’d grab Boesch, but, unless he gets hot, I’m not touching him in mixed leagues.
Rhyne Hughes – Hughes has moderate power and the penchant for the strikeout. Unless the O’s are benching Atkins completely, which I don’t think they are (though I’m not against it), Hughes doesn’t have value outside of AL-Only leagues. Could be mixed league worthy if he gets every day ABs.
Nolan Reimold – 2-for-5, as he hit leadoff. Wait, what? Leadoff? You know that guy in your league who drafted terribly and is now scrambling to kick start his team? Yeah, that’s the Orioles.
Lou Montanez – Sounds like someone working for Miami Vice.
Geovany Soto – 2-for-4, as he hit his 2nd homer yesterday. This is a question for everyone that doesn’t own Soto but who has seen how many times people have asked in the comments if they should drop him. Soto is now batting: A) .366 B) 100 points higher than .266 C) Almost two hundred points better than Clement. D) All of the above. If you answered D, you’re right. If you refused to answer, you probably dropped him and were hoping for the best.
Kosuke Fukudome – 3-for-4, 3 Runs, 2 RBIs and his 3rd homer. He’s what Matt Diaz sees when he looks in the mirror. If you can afford to bench Fukudome vs. all lefties, you could have yourself a valuable 5th outfielder.
Jeff Suppan – Suppan’s being sent to the bullpen. There’s a fly in The Soup’s ointment.
Dave Bush – 3 2/3 IP, 7 ER, 12 baserunners. Some people who were pushing their luck in their H2H league, got a Cleveland Streamer.
Justin Masterson – 4 IP, 7 ER, 12 baserunners. Speaking of Cleveland Streamers. Blech. This is the kind of soul-crushing loss that forces you to either bench him for his next start or drop him.
Gio Gonzalez – 7 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks and he only threw two walks. If he can keep his walks in check, he could be in for huge uptick in value.
Brett Anderson – Lifted from Saturday’s game with elbow tightness. I steered away from Anderson in all my leagues because of his IP jump from 2008 to 2009. I will say that when/if healthy, he has nasty stuff. As of right now, they’re reporting Anderson will make his next start. No idea who they are, but they’re usually right.
Javier Vazquez – 3 2/3 IP, 5 ER. I predicted rough times ahead when he moved to the AL, but wow. Someone in our fantasy baseball forums, mentioned there should be a glossary term for a pitcher going from the AL to the NL or vice versa. I agree. Anyone have any ideas?
Everth Cabrera – Cueto hit him on the knee with a pitch, which forced him to the bench for Sunday’s game, but EverCab did get in late and stole a base. Cueto should stick to screwing Cueto owners, and not EverCab ones.
Brad Penny – 7 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 0 Walks, 2 Ks. I have this strange feeling that Penny’s going to get named to the All-Star Game then get pummeled by the AL because Duncan won’t be on the staff.
Paul Konerko – Hit his 8th homer yesterday as he takes the lead in The Battle For Best Value From A Draft Pick That Everyone Yawned At. Vernon Wells is a close 2nd.
John Danks – 8 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks as Jenks finished the game. According to the Elias Sports Bureau, this was the first time a team’s game pitchers shared their last three letters since teammates, Rollie Fingers/Hans Wringers. Actually, they didn’t say that, but something that was overheard this week at the Elias Sports Bureau compound, “Billy, from Accounting, said, ‘I’ve had it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane!’ over a hundred times, beating his old record by 37.”
Brandon Webb may miss the rest of the season. Nothing good comes from drafting a top pitcher. Nothing, I tell you. I own Peavy in two leagues, so I’m right there with youse. Remind next year to revert back to not drafting starters in the first five rounds. Actually, next year you probably will be able to get Webb and Peavy after the fifth round. Hmm, that’s a pickle. Guess we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Webb was diagnosed with an “Ain’t Getting Better” problem. Captain Obvious says, “When a guy misses three months, then goes for an MRI, it’s not a good sign.” I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s shutdown for the year. But you’ve held him this long, what’s another day or two to hear the full prognosis? BTW, prognosis is doctor-talk for the 411. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Coco Crisp – Out for the season when his shoulder went snap, crackle, pop.
Carlos Beltran – Out on the 15-day DL. Now, get this, the Mets say the best case scenario is he returns in 15 days. Crazy, right? I wonder what the best case scenario would’ve been if he was out on the 14-day DL. Or 16-day DL.
Joel Pineiro – Two hit the Mets with one strikeout. In other the news, Willie Randolph laughs.
Joey Votto – Returned to the lineup after being out for almost a month on the Dizzabled List. I still think he can surpass Berkman’s numbers this season. (Doesn’t hurt that Berkman’s having a season for the old ages.) I’d buy into Votto picking up right where he left off.
Grady Sizemore – 2-for-5 in his return. I’m not crazy about Grady going forward. Elbow’s a tricky thing and Sizemore doesn’t seem to have a volume down button on his hustle.
Brandon Inge – Hit his 17th homer yesterday. Matt Wieters hit his 2nd.
Magglio Ordonez – Liquid Paper, be damned. Leyland returned Ordonez to the lineup in the 7th hole. Mags repaid him with an 0-for-2 night, then Raburn eventually replaced him and hit a walkoff homer. Now Raburn needs to play 2,130 consecutive games then Gary Cooper Jr. Jr. can play him in The Pride of the Tigers.
Kosuke Fukudome – Batted seventh yesterday. Okay, he’s crizzap. No argument here. But he does have a .390 OBP.
Jake Fox – DNP as Hoffpauir DH’d. The day before Fox hit third. Piniella’s following the Leyland School of Filling Out a Lineup Card. One day, they don’t play. The next day, they hit third. Following day, sit out again. You figure it out.
Ryan Zimmerman – 2-for-3, batting .297 on the season. Wasn’t he just batting .415 and carrying Nats Nation on his shoulders?
David Huff – 8 IP, 0 ER. Now he has a story to tell his grandkids when they ask about his career highlight.
Ian Snell – 2 2/3, 4 ER. Member when this guy was good? Think it was the autumn of ’06. A burial cave dating back to the 1st century BC was discovered, the Crocodile Hunter met his match with a stingray and Snell won a game. Good times!
Jhonny Peralta – HR yesterday. Someone wasn’t happy Khalil was taking all the weirdly placed H love.
Jason Frasor – Got the save. Frasor and the ‘do split, and it’s now safe to drop everyone else from the Jays pen.
David Price – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER and nine baserunners. From the comments Razzball received yesterday, I’d say Price’s owners aren’t too happy with him. I’d look at buying him on the cheap. They’re zigging? Zag, friend, zag!
John Mayberry – HR yesterday. All he does is hit home runs! No, really, that’s all he does.
B.J. Upton – 2-for-5. .430 in the last week. .330 in June. If he hits 3 homers a month for the next three months and continues to steal near his current pace, he’ll go 15/50.
Matt Lindstrom – Mollywopped for three runs in 2/3 of an inning. Leo Nunez left before that with a sprained ankle. Those with sprained patience could grab Dan Meyer as he’d be next in line in Joe Robbie/Pro Player/Dolphins/Brought to you by Blockbuster Stadium. Though I think Lindstrom has a few more closetastrophes in him before we get to Meyer.
Andrew Miller -7 IP, 1 ER. Nice start, I’m still not buying.
Koji Uehara – 6 IP, 1 ER. I like him, but would love to see him get out of the sixth inning in one of these games.
Francisco Liriano – 5 IP, 3 ER. Even when the start’s good, he chucks in five walks.
Casey McGehee – 2-for-5. No one else is going to hit for the Brewers? Everyone’s favorite novel, “Picking Up Slack,” by McGehee.
Billy Butler – 2 homers in the last four games. That’s one homer for each moob.
Miguel Tejada – 3-for-4, Tay-HA-duh’s still hitting an empty .337. Say-Blah-duh.
Tommy Hanson – 5 1/3 IP, 0 ER. Sure, you’re annoyed you benched him, but five walks through just over five and nine baserunners isn’t a great start. Benching him was the right move.
Jorge Posada – Donned the golden sombrero and is now hitting .230 in June.
Hiroki Kuroda – 8 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 Ks. All those starters people DL in hopes of them returning with value and Kuroda will probably exceed them all. Sure, he gets smacked oops upside his head sometimes, but he’s also lights out plenty of other times. Grey hearts Kuroda. Actually, Grey hearts 95% of NL West pitchers not named Jonathan Sanchez. Fingers, why are you talking about me in third person? My bad.
Felipe Lopez – 3-for-5 and has hit in 18 of 20 games this month. But… Wait for it… Here it comes… Is batting .262 in June. Hey, one-for-fours, say hello to your mother for me.
Max Scherzer – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 Ks. Six innings and guess how many pitches. 119. I feel an idea coming on for the All-Star game festivities that involves Scherzer and Kershaw facing off with no bullpens allowed.
Troy Tulowitzki – Two homers as Razzball’s favorite son is back. Now to get going Razzball’s favorite uncle, Nick Markakis.
Chad Gaudin – 11 Ks. Wait, huh? Eleven strikeouts. Ah, yes, that’s the stuff.
Scott Hairston – Returned from the DL and slid right back into the number three hole. Worth owning in 12 team leagues and could make a decent sub while Beltran’s out. That’s not to say he could make a decent hoagie. Different things.
Sammy Sosa – Claims are surfacing that he altered his jersey to make his arms look bigger. It was only after team officials convinced him that he shouldn’t leave on the rubber tie-offs that he put on his arms pre-injection. “But they make me look like The Ultimate Warrior!”
