With games like this, who needs healthy elbows? Certainly not Chris Sale. Four score and two dozen ‘and that’s me quoting me’s ago, I posted our AL-Only team. I went on about what a shambles the pitching staff was and how our only bat was Evan Longoria. Sure, we had high hopes for Brad Peacock, but our starters were cheap tequila bad. The more you looked at them, the worse The Gas Face you got. All we had was Jake Peavy and Chris Sale. ZOINKS!!!Please, blog, may I have some more?
After a long, much-needed vacation, Friday’s Buy/Sell returns. Friday’s Buy/Sell, “I spent the better part of the last four months having my naughty bits lathered in Marshmallow Fluff.” *crickets* Friday’s Buy/Sell, “All right, let’s get to the post.” Brett Gardner hit leadoff on Opening Day. In case you recently emerged from a coma, I’ll give it to you one more time. Gardner equals Jacoby Ellsbury. They’re the same. Tomato-tomato with a different emphasis. Right now, maybe you’re like, “No dur.” Okay, but in our Funston-fueled draft, Ellsbury went 70 picks before Gardner, so you may be saying “No dur,” but someone else is saying “Yeah dur.” If you’re a yeah dur’er and not a no dur’er, you might want to reconsider your dur’s. Or it’s dur on you. You want dur on you? No, you want no dur. Now, I’m not saying you should sell Ellsbury for less than his worth. I think he’s going to be fine, but if you can sell Ellsbury for a big bat or SP and get Gardner much cheaper, you do that. Dur. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Mark Trumbo – May not start every day, may not last in the majors when the once-singular Kendrys returns. Don’t matter to me. You’re not dropping anyone worthwhile to take the gambo.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Straight from Rudy’s risky pitcher post, “Sliders are the most effective pitch one can throw but are worse on the arm than fastballs/changeups. Pitchers who rely on sliders (15+% of pitchers) take this risk if they feel it’s the only way to reach their expected level of success. Young pitchers relying heavily on sliders for success are more akin to a kid on his tippy-toes trying to make it on a ride – they can only keep it up so much before they fall below that line or get hurt trying.” Following that line of thought, Brandon Morrow was thrown from the big boy ride and will start the season on the DL because he threw sliders with reckless a-Brandon. The Jays are going to backdate Morrow’s DL stint so he’ll only miss one start. Yeah, and I’d like to backdate my fantasy draft where I took Morrow, but that ain’t happening either. If Morrow only misses one start all year, call me Mr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
We at Razzball realize that exporting our views across the country has damaging consequences on the blogosphere. To help make amends, we are reaching out to leading team blogs and featuring their locally blogged answers to pressing 2011 fantasy baseball questions regarding their team.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I told you two days ago to own Justin Smoak in his series in Texas. Three straight games, three homers. To paraphrase Young MC from We’re All In The Same Gang, “I try my best to set an example, talkin’ up hyped players over hip-hop samples.” (BTW, the M’s lost yesterday when the catcher went to complete a strikeout by throwing the ball to first for the final out in the ninth but the ball sailed into right field and allowed the runner on first to score. Ha-HA!) Now the question is should you own Smoak the rest of the year… Sure, but that’s not the question. Tricked you! The question is about next year. He hasn’t reached his potential yet, but he is only 23-years-old. Some have compared him to Te(i)x. He definitely slumped for half a season like him. I think those ‘some’ were using that as a compliment though. Next year, Smoak should have the starting job out of spring training and could provide 25 homers with a decent average. In AL-Only keeper leagues and dynasty leagues, I’d make sure Smoak’s owned. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Chone Figgins – 4-for-4 as Chode tries to make his season numbers seem a whole lot better than they were. Never trust a guy that spells Sean ‘Chone.’
David Murphy – Out with a strained groin. Sounds like an injury that would sideline a porn actress.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I just want to put it out there, I love Eric Young Jr. I have a plan in place to have Prince Fielder have a long discussion Eric Young Jr. about nogoodnik fathers and step in as EY Jr.’s surrogate. We will vacation in Orlando and try faux exotic foods at Epcot, like Greek and Spanish. When Eric Young Jr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The first time Manny Ramirez went on waivers was before the 2004 season when the Sawx dared any team to accept his $20MM/year contract. No one did and he helped the Sawx win the World Series. Now it’s the Dodgers’ turn. Say goodbye to Mannywood? Could be. If no one dares take him, the McCourts will be fighting over custody of him during the divorce proceedings (You take him…No, you take him…No, you take him to Central Park and let him play on the jungle gym then, when he falls, carry him 20 blocks to the nearest ER). Hopefully for Manny’s sake, the Patron Saint of Bad Contracts (Kenny Williams of the ChiSox) claims him. If Manny goes to a new team, it could invigorate him like a healthy dose of estrogen. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Octavio Dotel – In the closerousel in L.A., Dotel recorded the save. Broxton worked a perfect 8th, then Torre threw three relievers in the ninth with none of them being Kuo. Of course not, why would Kuo be used? He was only labeled the closer replacement while Broxton figures his shizz out. Assuming no meltdowns, Broxton will be the closer again soon.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hello, new readers. No, this isn’t High Times dot com, but don’t worry there’s Doritos at the end of this post. Hey, don’t skip ahead. You have to read the post first. Yes, the computer is talking to you. Aw, I’m just messing with you. The computer’s not talking to you. You’re just reading, silly! So, Bud Norris didn’t come out of nowhere to be my new Razzpick du jour. Yesterday, he went six innings, giving up one run and K’d 4. In the not-too-decent past, I mentioned liking his upside. For our friends in Latin America, the caveat is his wildness. The love comes from the fact he has more Ks than innings. There’s only ten other starters with more than 110 innings in the major leagues that can claim that. That’s one starter for every finger. Unless Antonio Alfonseca is reading this. The wildness is still there, but he hasn’t walked more than 3 batters in a game since April. I’d absolutely grab Norris for the last month if I needed Ks (who doesn’t?) and some upside (of course you do). Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Chris Johnson – 4-for-6, 1 RBI in a 16th inning game that saw Roy Oswalt play left field and Tim Kurkjian’s voice cracking at the sheer craziness of the game. Can you believe this game, fellas?!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Chase Utley went 0-for-5 as he returned from the DL. My favorite advice by fantasy ‘perts is when they tell you to get a returning superstar into your lineup. Do people often leave their 1st round picks on the DL when they’re playing? Is this something I need to tell people? While you’re at it, get Pujols in your lineups too. Oh, and put on some pants before you get arrested. Another returning middle infielder with an oh-fer yesterday was Dustin Pedroia. Scrappy Doo fought hard to come back early, so he might not be at his usual 110%, but at, say, 80% he’s Dustin Pedro and that’s enough for me. The last man to recover from the 2010 Middle Infieluenza Epidemic was Martin Prado, who actually had some hits with a 3-for-5, 2 RBIs night. [dur] Get them all in your lineup.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Cuban legend goes that Aroldis Chapman once threw a fastball so hard that it caused Fidel Castro to say, “I haven’t seen something so beautiful since a young Charo.” Knowing that Fidel is a huge Charo fan, that’s not mild praise. (Fidel co-wrote Charo’s unauthorized biography, “My Cuchi-Cuchi” with Kitty Kelly.) The problem with our Cuban friend, Aroldis, and it’s a pretty major problem, there’s no spot for him in the rotation and he’s been pitching strictly as a reliever for a month or so. He’s on his way to the majors and I’m foaming at the mouth to own him in keepers and leagues next year. He can be a top 25 starter next year. Alas, for this year, you’re looking at a long man out of the bullpen. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Brian Duensing – Okay, I’ve mentioned him now to the point where it’s going to start to seem like I really3 like him. His K/9 was terrible in the minors and not much better in the majors. He has been able to keep his ratios all tidy-like and he gets the Indians next. I’ll buy that for a dollar! (Not much more though.)
Daniel Hudson – Is it Dan or Daniel? Can we get a ruling on that? I’m more bullish in NL-Only leagues on Hudson, but he has the stuff to make a difference in mixed leagues.Please, blog, may I have some more?