When I told you to pick up Joaquin Benoit yesterday, I was 85% sure he would close games until the Tigers traded for Papelbon, who will be known in Detroit as a Papelbonneville. Then, because Leyland reads Razzball between smokes, he named Benoit closer by not naming him the closer. He said, “I’m not naming anybody closer. I’m just saying if Benoit was available right now, I would try to close with him.” Thanks for clarifying! Managers deciding on a closer is like debating euthanasia. Valverde’s done, pull the plug! The Yelp reviews for Benoit are through the roof, but there’s a lot of five star reviews from fantasy baseballers with only one other closer. I’d grab Benoit in all leagues and hope he can hold the job and make the thought of trading for Papelbonneville absurd. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Do you hear that? Grrrrrrrr. Is that a bear? Grumble, grumble. Is that Grey complaining about how he traded away Manny Machado for David Price while picking up every rookie pitcher known to man? The sound you make while pronouncing Prince’s weird symbol name. Ah, I know what that is. That’s my gut. Not only does it tell me when I’m hungry, it speaks fluent crazy musician. True fact: it once explained G’n’R’s Estranged video to me. It’s quite simple really: Axl Rose is a nuttier than a bukkake video. Hrm, maybe I didn’t need my gut to tell me that…anywho, my gut is now trying to tell me something about fantasy baseball for this week and it’s telling me this Oakland guy named Brandon Moss will be a good play this week and is only 31% owned in ESPN leagues and 21% in Yahoo. Ok, it didn’t tell me the last part, my eyes did cuz I looked him up. But I can tell you’re not convinced so let’s see why Moss should be a good play for week 12 of the 2013 fantasy baseball season…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The name YoGa conjures peace, calm and sneaking looks at girls in yoga pants. On the mound, YoGa conjures stress. Starting him is like asking him to be your designated driver. You really have no idea what you’re going to get. He’s become more predictable as of late, but not in the good way. Every game this year he’s looked like someone put him in the fridge for an hour, then poured Magic Shell over him, then chiseled him out and left the fake-choco shell on the mound. I was already to drop him. I had hit my brink. So, how does he reward me? Does he pitch terrible and allow me the freedom of dropping him? You think anything’s that easy with YoGa? Yesterday, Yovani Gallardo was regularly hitting 93 MPH, and looking the part of the guy that finished 11th in Cy Young voting two years ago and won 16 games with a 3.66 ERA last year. A guy that has been a solid number two fantasy starter for the last four years. He threw a near-flawless 8 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners (1 BB), 4 Ks game. Of course, it was against the MIA Marlins and only 4 Ks. Still, I can’t drop him after that, but I also can’t start him for his next game in Great American Ballpark. So, for now I’ll hold a guy that I can’t start or bench confidently. Ugh, more stress! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The week 8 two-start landscape is particularly cruddy. Sure, if you’ve got a Kershaw- or Miller-type two-starter you’re set; you’re awesome. Good for you. Those of us perusing the wire for our two-starters, though, are left with mostly turds. It’s really bad. We have ten dudes in the “DON’T START” tier. Our previous high in that department was six, and that week is the only other with more than three in the bottom tier. Maybe I’m just in a pessimistic mood, but I truly don’t trust the bulk of the week 8 crop. Take it easy on the two-start streaming this week.

As always, probable pitchers are subject to change. For a look at all fantasy baseball streamers, click that link.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As you read in the title, this is the second installment of the bullpen check-up. Today we look at the American League. (The National League middle relievers post is there, and Grey’s Closer Look.) The options seem to be less as compared to the NL, but quality is still abundant. So enjoy my targets for Holds in the American league. As per the NL post the Peeping Tom’s are guys that you want to watch from a far, but don’t get caught looking too long because it’s the clinker for you or in actuality a miss on the waiver wire.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Los Angeles Dodgers 2011 Minor League Review

Organizational Talent Rankings via Baseball America:

2012 (23) | 2011 (12) | 2010 (21) | 2009 (23) | 2008 (6) | 2007 (6) | 2006 (2)

2011 Affiliate Records

MLB: [82-79] NL West

AAA: [70-74] Pacific Coast League – Albuquerque

AA: [77-62] Southern League – Chattanooga

A+: [80-60] California League – Rancho Cucamonga

A: [72-67] Midwest League – Great Lakes

R: [34-22] Pioneer League – Ogden

The Run Down

While none of them is particularly interesting, the Dodgers have quite a few prospects who are close to helping in some capacity at the Major League level.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Los Angeles Dodgers 2010 Minor League Review
Overall farm ranking via Baseball America (2009)
2010 (24) | 2009 (23) | 2008 (6) | 2007 (6) | 2006 (2) | 2005 (2) | 2004 (2)

Record of Major and Minor League Teams
MLB: [80 – 82] NL West
AAA: [72 – 71] Pacific Coast League – Albuquerque
AA: [ 65 – 74] Southern League – Chattanooga
A+: [50 – 90] California League – Inland Empire
A: [90 – 49] Midwest League – Great Lakes
R: [44 – 31] Pioneer League – Odgen
R: [30 – 25] Arizona League

The Run Down
Quite a disappointing season for Dodger fans, and that’s without introducing the McCourt’s divorce into the picture. Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Los Angeles Dodgers 2009 Minor League Review
Overall farm ranking via Baseball America (2009)
2009 (23) | 2008 (6) | 2007 (6) | 2006 (2) | 2005 (2) | 2004 (2)

Record of Major and Minor League Teams
MLB: [95 – 67] NL West – best record in NL
AAA: [80 – 64] Pacific Coast League
AA: [ 65 – 74] Southern League
A+: [59 – 81] California League
A: [81 – 59] Midwest League
R: [24 – 32] Arizona League
R: [42 – 34] Pioneer League

The Run Down

After several years in the top 10, the Dodgers farm ranking fell significantly due to several trades (Manny Ramirez, Ronnie Belliard) and a significant lack of a promising young prospect. Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?