The Nats will probably bring Stephen Strasburg into Washington in the bubble car with the albino John Lannan charged with throwing rose petals at his feet. This was recently overheard in the Nats bathroom sometime in the near future, “Um, John, do you think you can stop with the petals?” “Stephen, it’s my duty.” “Yeah, well, this is my doodie and I’m going to be about 20 minutes.” “Fair enough, sire!” I went over Strasburg for fantasy already. Been there, drunkenly wrote that. I’m not changing my projections from that post. A three and a half ERA seems optimistic enough. Could he do a 2.75 ERA? Sure, but I’m not counting on that. I’m already giving him what I think we can get from Greinke. So a 3.50 ERA… Let’s see, who else could bring such luster to our fantasy El Camino. In 303 and a third 2nd half innings over the last three years, Bronson Arroyo has a 3.06 ERA. Would anyone in their right mind trade Strasburg for Arroyo? Not right now. The hype is way too strong with the young Austrian. Today, I think you can sell Strasburg for someone’s kidney. I’m not sure what you’d do with three kidneys. Maybe a bookend. Think about how you felt owning Matusz, Smoak, Ike Davis, etc.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jose Lopez
Saul Rivera, who is surprisingly not related to Eli Whiteside, was acquired by the Diamondbacks. Big shakes, huh? Yeah, Rivera could get into the mix for saves. Another potential candidate for saves is… Wait for it… Here it comes… It’s here somewhere… Where are my notes… Oh, here they are… That’s my freakin’ shopping list, and I didn’t even spell minestrone right… Oh, here… Aaron Heilman! Not sure how the D-Backs are going to have a bullpen of Saul and Heilman. Sounds like the outtakes for Schlinder’s List. Saul walks 3 batters and turns the game over to Heilman. Heilman enters and says, “I pardon you, Saul.” Heilman will probably get exploited for being, well, not so good and having small fingers, but Qualls is close to getting removed from the closer role. Right now, Heilman’s the setup man and he gave up a run yesterday. The Diamondbacks also dropped Bob Howry. Why? Because. Oh, and there’s Juan Gutierrez. That’s not a closerousel, THIS IS A CLOSEROUSEL! I’d own Qualls and Heilman. Gutierrez and I, we’re like Kramer vs.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Now it’s time for everyone’s favorite game, Fantasy Baseball, Fun With Numbers. Ding, ding, ding… Bassoon… Triangle! Triangle! Triangle! Cow bell! More cow bell! One last ding. In today’s installment of Fantasy Baseball, Fun With Numbers, we’re going to look at some hitters and try to figure out if maybe the numbers tell a different story than their names tell. Anyway, here’s the latest in Fantasy Baseball, Fun With Numbers:
Player A – In 241 Post-All-Star ABs, 40/12/33/.232
Player B – In 190 Post-All-Star ABs, 35/12/30/.316
Player A is Raul Ibanez, Player B is J.D.
Please, blog, may I have some more?We continue our 2010 fantasy baseball rankings with the top 20 2nd basemen for 2010 fantasy baseball. 2nd base is an odd duck. Shortstops have speed. You can find speed in the outfield. There’s even some legitimate speed at 3rd base. All of these 2nd basemen must have grown up watching Bret Boone and Jeff Kent because you’re more likely to find power at 2nd base than speed.
Please, blog, may I have some more?The comments were shut off on the Position Eligibility for 2010 Fantasy Baseball post because that post was just listing players and their eligibility for 2010 fantasy baseball. Now, in this here post, we get down to business. Or bidness, if you mispronounce business. That business is pointing out players that gain some advantage by having more eligibility than they know what to do with. Are you going to finish the rest of that 3rd base eligibility?
Please, blog, may I have some more?We already went over the top 20 catchers for 2009 and the top 20 1st first basemen for 2009. Today, it’s all about the top 20 2nd basemen. The 2nd basemen pool is shallow (not as kiddie-sized as the shortstops, but we’ll get to them in the next post). Because of this shallowivity (Made Up Word Of The Day!), the 2nd basemen rankings can be split up into two tiers. The guys you want and the tomato-tomahto guys. The Guys You Want’s names kinda give them away. The Tomato-Tomahto Guys are a whole group of 2nd basemen that are so close to each other in rank, it really didn’t matter which one of them you owned. At one time or another during the season, you probably dropped one of the Tomato-Tomahtos for a different Tomato-Tomahto. Everyone probably has one Tomato-Tomahto guy that they hated during the season. I have a few. Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2009 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Ryan Madson finally took over for Brad Lidge. This was only about three months in the making and after six separate endorsements by Manuel saying Lidge is their closer. Ah fanabla, what a headache. Ever since Brett Myers returned from his MMA training, fantasy baseballers (that’s you!) seem ready to put Myers in the closer role. That would be too easy, right? Right. No, Madson’s the first guy to grab and maybe Myers sees time here and there. I’d grab both of them, unless you have a bleeding ulcer, then I’d stay away. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Scott Feldman – 7 IP, 0 ER, 5 Ks and leads the AL with 16 wins. Shoot me now. Seriously. Shoot me and Randy Wolf while you’re at it.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Evan Longoria went 0-for-4 yesterday. He’s been kinda terrible for about three months now. Man, third base is a minefield. Now I’m not putting Longoria in the Wright Sucks Then Gets Conked On The Head box. No, he hasn’t been nearly that bad. But two separate months of an under .240 average and two months of zero steals and tw0 months of 1 steal and this sentence has nearly as many ands as, “In the saying, “Fish-and-Chips,” it’s necessary to have a hyphen between “fish” and “and,” and “and” and “chips.” I’m not ready to proclaim where Longoria should be drafted next year. I’m Grey and I make proclamations!
Please, blog, may I have some more?Carlos Ruiz and angry Philly fans have a new battery mate in Cliff Lee, as he was traded from the Indians along with Ben Francisco. Going the other way were a slew of prospects, including my fave, Carlos Carrasco. J.P.
Please, blog, may I have some more?A lot of starting pitchers have been traded by the A’s. Some fare great (Haren), some have mixed results (Hudson), some collapse (Mulder). But there has never been an ex-A’s starting pitcher that seems to miss the AL West as much as Chad Gaudin. While he did get crushed @ LAA, his last 3 starts @SEA, home against SEA, and @TEX have netted 21 IP / 2-1 / 2.14 ERA / 0.76 WHIP / 28 Ks. That’s a Peavian 12 K/9 IP with a K/BB ratio of 21:5. We’ve had Gaudin on a couple of deep league teams since we love NL West pitchers and it’s been hard to recommend him because he’s been so damn wild. But after these past three dominating starts (8+ Ks, 2 or less BBs), he’s a must pickup in any league format at this point. Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Everth Cabrera – 3-for-8 this weekend, with one steal. If you need steals, don’t wait until after the 3 steal game to grab him. He may not be there.
Please, blog, may I have some more?

