Fantasy Baseball Advice

The Marlins outfield is only big enough to handle one prospect as Logan Morrison is hitting the DL on the same night that Mike Stanton finally hits a home run.  Morrison projected to be the anti-Stanton with solid AVG and OBP but limited power (10-15 HRs).  Yet after 4 early HRs, he was showing the 4-category prowess that makes owners feel all a-tingle.  But then Logan goes and hurts his left foot and will miss 2-4 weeks.  Guess Daniel Day-Lewis is now the favorite for the title role in The Logan Morrison Story.  I’d stash vs. drop Morrison if you’ve got DL or bench space.   Oh well, good thing Stanton only hit a solo shot vs a grand slam or Morrison might’ve needed his foot amputated.

Felix Hernandez – 7 2/3 IP of shutout ball with 8 Ks.  Whew.  For a while there, I thought F-Her was going to pull the Zack Greinke “Yawn.  I had to work extra hard to win a Cy Young on a crappy team.  I’m going to mail it in for a year and then ask to be traded in the offseason” routine.   Even more impressive than F-Her’s pitching line was that the Mariners lavished him with a whole run so he could get the win.

Kevin Youkilis - Yoooooooooooouuk left last night’s game with a bruised shin.  It’ll take a day or two to determine if it’s serious so I’ll take this moment to take a nonsensical estimate of the damage.  Let’s see…Youkilis is Jewish.  The ‘Shin’ is the unlucky symbol on a dreidel that requires the spinner to contribute to the pot.  As the one song ever written for Hanukkah has taught us, one must wait until a dreidel is dry before one could play with it because they are made out of clay.  Clay Buchholz is a teammate of Youkilis’ on the Red Sox.  Buchholz rhymes with cuckolds which are men who have been conned into raising another man’s child.  So it’s obvious that Youkilis will not be ready to play until he realizes that a teammate has shtupped his wife by spinning her like a top.  Then he must wait for the physical bruise on his shin to heal and the tears from the emotional bruise on his heart have had time to dry.

Brad Hawpe – The Padres offense is hopeless with Hawpe (.119 AVG with .179 OBP!) and the only hope for the Padres is for a Hawpeless lineup.  Bud Black has done this in three of the last four games.  I think Hawpe will be DFA’d in the next couple of weeks and they bring up 1B prospect Anthony Rizzo by June 1st.  Jorge Cantu is the short-term beneficiary of any additional playing time.  Opponents benefit either with Hawpe or Cantu.

Jason Bartlett – Don’t quote me on this but Bartlett could prove to be a stealth MI choice this year for those that punted or got Nishoka’d.  He’s shaken an early season slump to go 12 for his last 23 and has been moved back to the top of the lineup.  The Padres are definitely being aggressive on the basepaths this year and Bartlett has the potential of going .280 w/ 30 SBs.  He makes for a pretty good pearing (pun intended) with a 2B or SS that might be light on the speed (e.g., Uggla).

Torii Hunter – Angel i’s broke out of a big slump (4-for-38) with a 2 run HR to ruin Josh Beckett’s night.  He’s been quite dependable since becoming an Angel (.280-.290/20+ HRs) but not sure how much he has left in the tank – just that he has a little more than Vernon Wells and Bobby Abreu.  Peter Bourjos must feel like a young Mel Gibson on a team full of Danny Glovers.

Chris Perez – The Eastside & Down star blew his first save of the year, giving up 2 ERs in a 3-2 loss to Kansas City.  Those were the first runs Perez has given up in his last 26+ innings.  Maybe it was just a tribute to his ex-mentor Ryan Franklin.

Aaron Hill – Day-to-day with a hamstring issue.  If Canadian Bacon is like ham, are Canadian hamstrings like bacon?

Roy Oswalt - 6 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 7 Ks.  So much for the back strain scare from his last start.  Given that this start was against the Padres, I’m sure everyone in the Phillies middle relief was volunteering to take Roy’s spot for a start.  Throw Kyle Kendrick a bone!

Daniel Hudson - That’s 0-4 now for Hudson who had pitched pretty well in his first three starts (6+ IP in each start, 4 or less ER, average of over 7 K’s).  He was sick of being subtle as he gave up a 4-spot to the Reds in the 1st inning in about as ugly a fashion as one could (3 BBs including 2 with bases loaded, 1 HBP,  and a 2 run single to Miguel Cairo).  I’ll say this for Reds games – you don’t want to show up late as half the scoring is in the first inning.

Mike Leake – That’s 3-0 for Leake after a solid start (7 IP, 3 ER).  With Cueto and Bailey getting healthy, it’s tough to say whether he stays in the rotation or goes to the ‘pen.  If they let the judge decide, it’ll likely be the latter.

Justin Morneau – That’s now 5 games missed for the flu.  As someone who has him starting in a weekly H2H league, I’d like to give him the FLU minus the L.

Freddie Freeman – The rookie 1B went deep against Kershaw – rather impressive for a lefty hitter.  He’s not going to hit for average this year but he looks like he could reach 20 HRs.  Not bad for a UTIL or a CI fill-in.  He’ll be competing neck-and-neck this year with Jerry Sands for the “Best Rookie Who I Thought Was Black Until I Saw A Picture” Award – also known as the Reggie Cleveland All-Stars.

Mike Stanton – I know I mentioned it in the lede (fancy newspaper spelling of the word) but it’s worth noting again.  Finally, Stanton hit a HR!  While that was his only hit, he scored 2 additional runs via walks.  Better get ready for more souvenirs, you five people who sit in the Florida bleachers.

Pedro Alvarez – Speaking of long-awaited first HRs (I talk as I type)!  Pedro ended the night 3-4 with 2 runs and 2 RBIs.  A few more nights like that and dorky Pirate fans can wear their ‘Vote For Pedro’ t-shirts with only its original-intended detached irony.

Clayton Kershaw – Was one out away from a complete game victory when he loaded the bases with 2 outs.  Kershaw’s gassed after throwing 119 pitches.  Mattingly comes out of the dugout with six highly motivating words “Broxton is ready in the pen”.  Kershaw chooses to own his fate and, alas, David Ross hit a 2-run single on an 0-2 fastball.  It’s hard to complain about a pitching line of 8 2/3 IP, 3 ER 9 baserunners, 7 K but it looks a whole lot better with a Win attached to it.

Matt Kemp – Hit his 2nd walkoff HR in 5 games.  Is Rihanna the Buck Showalter of WAGs?  The year after they leave leads to ultimate success.  Kemp has clearly been the best fantasy player in the NL so far and – while his average won’t stay above .400 – he’s got a decent chance of clearing .300 if he maintains his 19% K rate (he’s been around 25% for his MLB career).  One negative – only because Grey LOOOOOOOVES Kemp and I feel the need to balance him out – is that he’s only 1-for-4 in SBs since starting the season going 7-for-7.  What happened, Davey Lopes?!

Scott Baker – Baker dominated the O’s at Camden Yards, striking out 9 while giving up no runs and 5 baserunners in 7 IP.  That’s on the heels of another 5 baserunner in 7 IP start at Tampa.  Baker has shown the potential to rise to another level (1.19 WHIP in 2009) but has been generally plagued by bad innings and gopheritis.  I’m sure I’m in the minority on this one but I’d rather have Baker than Liriano this year.

Kyle Lohse – Lohse swatted away the Nats with a complete game 2 hitter.  Everyone’s talking about Jaime Garcia’s start but Lohse is now 3-1 with a 2.01 ERA, 0.73 WHIP, and a decent K-rate (22 in 31 IP).  He’s had two bad, health-marred years since his last solid one in 2008 (15-6, 3.78/1.30 in 200 IP) but if Duncan can get a solid year out of Joel Piniero, why not Lohse?  I’d pick him up in mixed leagues but would be aggressive in sitting him against bad matchups.

Brandon McCarthy - Brandie Mac is looking like a fantastic buy low acquisition for the A’s.  He’s now up to 30 IP at a 2.10 ERA clip and a K/BB ratio of 20/3.  I haven’t been that turned on by a McCarthy since Jenny McCarthy was on MTV’s Singled Out.

Will Venable – Venable’s awful hitting blends in very well in San Diego but ever alert Bud Black seems to have noticed.  Venable (a lefty) was benched in favor of Chris Denorfia (a righty) on Thursday night even though they were facing a righty (Oswalt).  Not a great show of support for Venable.  I can’t recommend Venable in shallow leagues but – if you’re speculating on SBs – he’s a better bet than, say, a Nyjer Morgan.

Nyjer Morgan – Sent to the 15-day with a deep thigh bruise.  The trainers knew the bruise was deep when they heard it recite prose from Kierkegaard.  Say what you want about Nyjer but he is the 3rd best active player with an African country as his first name – behind Chad Billingsley and Tsu-Dan Kalbi of the Korean Baseball League.

These are the leading hitters in the major leagues for April.  Do I think every hitter does the same thing every year?  No, I don’t.  But hitters do tend to follow patterns.  If these players were good in April last year, there’s at least a chance they will be good this year.  Also, as I went over in this spring training stats post, just because a hitter isn’t hitting in March doesn’t preclude a big April.  Anyway, here’s some top fantasy baseball hitters for the month of April:

Adrian Gonzalez – 22 homers pre-ASB in 2008, 24 homers in 2009, 18 homers in 2010.  Just wait until A-Gon starts getting crap in September and October for not being “clutch.”  Yeah, I put douchey quotes around a word, sue me.

Jorge Cantu – Was good for power the last two Aprils.  Was not good in any other month.  That’s Was (Not Was) for you crazy 80′s kids.

Bobby Abreu – As I went over the hitters that did well in April, there were quite a few that A) Did not do well the rest of the season and B) Are older guys that obviously tire as the season progresses and C) There’s no C.

Torii Hunter – See above, not C.

Alfonso Soriano – Has been better in the first half the last couple of years.  (Couple is a sneaky way of saying two, yet making it seem like it’s more than two.  Girlfriend, “How many dollars did you leave on that thirty dollar bill?”  You, “A couple.”)

Justin Morneau – April’s been historically his 2nd best month after May.  He’s Te(i)x’s other half.

Pablo Sandoval – I forgot he hit well last April (.368, 3 homers).  Probably because he did so well trying to erase any memory of it with his next five months.

Brad Hawpe – Has always been a 1st half hitter.  Let’s see it in San Diego though where he might not be *pinkie to mouth* Hawpy.

Ryan Theriot – In April 2009, .317, 5 steals.  Last year in April, .337 and 5 steals.  Knowing La Russa, a good April in the leadoff spot this year for Theriot could cement him in that spot for the whole year.

Kosuke Fukudome – 4 homers, .338 in April of 2009; 5 homers, .344 last year in April.  But then he says Fuk u to May!

What I never understood about the trading deadline is why wait until the last second to make a trade?  Did the Padres really wake up on July 31st and think they suddenly needed a bat?  Wasn’t this apparent on April 2nd?  I understand you don’t trade for pieces if you’re out of it, but the Padres, for instance, haven’t been out of it all season, unless they assumed they weren’t contending when the season started.  Maybe they wouldn’t have got Ryan Ludwick, because the Cards may not have been selling him in April, but they needed someone.  Then there’s the other deals that remind me of my friend who buys things just because they are on sale.  “Do you really need a 120 count box of chicken bouillon?”  “No, but Shop-Rite was selling Chicken Bazillions for only $2.99.”  So, in that vein, do you really need Matt Capps when Jon Rauch is serviceable?  No, but we’ve been dying to shed these upside prospects and the price was right.  Deep thoughts by Grey Albright, I suppose.  Anyway, here’s what I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Lance Berkman – Traded to the Yankees.  This is one of those moves that’s actually better for fantasy.  In real baseball, adding Berkman to the Yankees lineup is like adding pecan sandies to a tray of chocolate chip cookies.  Hey, if you like a pecan sandie, then go for it.  I think you were fine with the chocolate chips.  Let’s face it, leaving Houston helps anyone’s value.  Berkman goes from between Keppinger and The Glue They Once Called El Caballo to hitting in an All-Star lineup.  Hey, Runs and RBIs, nice to see you again.  As I mentioned in the comments when the trade went down, A-Rod’s sitting at 16 homers, so don’t expect The Stadium They Built Next To The Stadium That Ruth Built to suddenly add 20 homers to Berkman.  He’s still old and struggling.  Value goes up, but only so much.

Ryan Ludwick – I always want to write Lyan Rudwick.  Not sure why.  Anyhoo, Ludwick goes to the Padres.  This move is almost lateral for Ludwick.  Maybe a slight nudgwick up on value.  He wasn’t playing every day in St. Louie, but he wasn’t hitting in Petco either.  That’s six of one, half dozen warning track fly outs.  Ludwick seemed like he ran his course in La Russa Land, so the fact the Padres appreciate him might boost his confidence.  It’s the Sally Field syndrome.  Ludwick, “They like me!  They really like me!”

Joel Hanrahan – Remind me not to pay attention to Buster Olney anymore.  First he tells me Cliff Lee is traded to the Yankees then he says Hanrahan will be the closer only to watch Dotel get traded and Meek to enter the closer picture.  Olney, you’re on notice.  If you have room, you need to own both Meek and Hanrahananananan.  The good news is they’re both solid.  I do think Hanrahanananan is the first one to get saves.  Meanwhile, Dotel’s a don’t own.

Aaron Heilman – With Qualls going off to the Rays, this should clear up who’s closing in Arizona.  Now Heilman is not good, but they really can’t keep going to Gutierrez.  With the season he’s had, Gutierrez shouldn’t even be pitching in the major leagues anymore.  And if you were holding out hope Qualls would turn his season around, you can now safely take him off life support, Kevorkian.  (Speaking of which, I watched the HBO movie with Pacino and Sarandon this weekend.  Wow, Al and Susan got long in the tooth.  This was like when you go back to your old high school to see your former teachers and they’re all so much older than you remember them and it’s very depressing. Then, just when you didn’t think it could get any worse, you run into the hot English teacher you used to have a crush on and she has short gray hair and she’s wearing slacks from Ross, Dress For Less and she coyly mentions how she just got divorced and you think you might actually have a chance now and that makes you want to vomit on the Philly fan who vomited on another Philly fan.)

Ryan Howard – Left the game after jamming his ankle.  I’m holding a candlelight vigil that he avoids DL.  As of right now, the x-rays were negative, which is positive.  Hopefully he just misses a few days.

Jarrod Saltalamacchia – I’d give a dollar to hear a Masshole pronounce Salty’s full name.  Saltymochachino could be a sneaky dynasty pickup for those in deep leagues.  For now, he’s bench depth for the Sawx.

Randy Wolf – Hit with a line drive on his wrist.  He immediately left the game pist.

Ted Lilly – He’s been solid in away games this year, but terrible at Dodger Stadium over the last three years.  That was facing the Dodgers and not the Padres, Giants and Diamondbacks.  As long as the Lilly handles SoCal better than Snookie handles SoCo, this looks like a positive all around for him.  Don’t think he gets much better than a mid-3 ERA going forward, but he’s a solid number three fantasy starter.

Ryan Theriot – Speed guys’ values don’t really change with a new environment.  Terry-O do what he do, which is fine at MI.

Alex Gordon – 2-for-3 with his 2nd homer in three games and a 7 game hitting streak.  It’s now or never time for Gordon and it looks like he’s going the now route.  Grab him immediately.

Rick Ankiel – Since Bobby Cox doesn’t have much time left, it makes sense the Braves are looking towards the immediate future.  And by immediate future, I mean August.  Ankiel will split time in the outfield, which will hurt his value, but he wasn’t helping his value much anyway.

Martin Prado – Fractured his pinky and will probably be DL’d on Monday.  Alfonseca would’ve just grown a new digit.  If you need short term help, Infante should see the majority of the playing time.

Blake DeWitt – 3-for-4, 1 RBI.  His Mom was hot, but he’s an end of the lineup hitter with little power or speed.

Aramis Ramirez – Just when you thought he turned the corner, he goes and turns another corner to end up back where he started with thumb problems.

Cristian Guzman – I’m embarrassed to say this, but in leagues where I need runs and average, I actually grabbed Guzman.  In one league, I’ll be blahtooning him with Desmond.  In another, him and fahgettaBartlett.  When you punt MI, these are the choices you need to make.  Guzman should have value until Kinsler returns, which may not be until the end of August.  Yes, Kinsler’s out for a while and didn’t do shizz when he was playing.

Edinson Volquez – 5 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 6 Ks.  The one earned run and win hide the 5 walks in five innings, which isn’t a great sign moving forward.  He’s just as risky today as he was on Saturday.

Stephen Strasburg – ESPN reported Strasburg threw with no pain.  They’ll be reporting later when Strasburg ‘goes to drop a deuce.’

Francisco Liriano – 7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 11 Ks.  I feel like his season has gone relatively unnoticed.  He has 150 Ks in 136 IP.  That’s the 3rd best K-rate in the major leagues.  His xFIP is 2.92, which is the best in the majors, just above Halladay and Johnson.

Daniel Hudson – 8 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 4 Ks.  The Haren move was questionable for the Diamondbacks, but they redeemed themselves with this get.  I love Hudson in NL-Only leagues and keepers.  Wouldn’t surprise me to see January Grey write a sleeper post about Hudson for 2011.  Gets the Padres next and has mixed league matchup appeal.

Adam LaRoche – 3-for-6, 6 RBIs with two homers.  His cuckoo clock must’ve alerted him it’s August.

Dexter Fowler – Robbing what would of been Alfonso Soriano’s 2nd homer of the day, Fowler knocked hard against the wall.  As he was carted off the field, I began to look for replacements for him.  My guess is a 15-day DL stint.

Matt Lindstrom – As if there’s not enough closer news already, Brandon Lyon picked up the save yesterday because Lindstrom has a sore back.  You know I grabbed Lyon in a few leagues.

Jeremy Hellickson – First let’s see what Stephen had to say when he went over him, “Hellickson has a lively low 90′s MPH fastball that tops out at 95, a curve that is thrown between 77 and 79 mph, and a solid changeup…. Overall, he has been able to keep a good K-rate, above-average control, and is keeping the ball in the park fairly well.   A middle of the rotation pitcher is a definite reality.”  That was prior to his 2010 minor league season, but not much has changed.  In 117 2/3 IP of Triple-A this year, he has 123 Ks, only 35 walks and a 2.45 ERA.  He’s getting the well-deserved start today vs. the Twins.  That’s the good news.  And there’s a lot of it.  I’ll be tuning in to watch him pitch.  The bad news is he doesn’t have a spot in the rotation.  After the start, he may be sent back down until September.

Gavin Floyd – 7 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 5 Ks.  After the game, Ozzie said, “Don’t even get me started on Caucasians.”

Edwin Jackson – Shame on you, White Sox.

Jorge Cantu – I already went over the Cantu trade, but since then it was revealed that Cantu would platoon with rookie, Mitch Moreland.  The Rangers need a rookie lefty in the lineup at all times?  Very confusing move.  Feel like it’s taking righty/lefty splits too far.  Either way, this hurts Cantu value, which was margin already.

James Shields – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 11 Ks.  If you started him vs. the Yankees, you deserved this start.  But you probably didn’t so now you hate him even more than when you were starting him and he was putting up a near-5 ERA.  He’s totally messing with you.  Hey, don’t shoot the messenger.

Jeanmar Gomez – 5 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 2 Ks.  He had a 5.70 ERA in the minors.  That’s a red flag with a skull and crossbones on it.

Chris Perez – Will now take over full-time closing duties for the Indians.  He’ll be a Brain Freeze in this afternoon’s Closer Look, but he could perform like a Donkeycorn the rest of the way.  Oh, and for people who understood that last sentence, thanks for reading.  Pour some out for the people who read Donkeycorn and were like, “What the eff is this guy talking about?  I’m going back to ESPN.”

Jake Westbrook – Scary thing is this, Westbrook, Kearns and Wood is what the Indians had to trade.  Even Houston had Oswalt and Berkman.  Maybe Duncan can do the voodoo that he do, but I wouldn’t grab Westbrook outside of NL-Only leagues until I saw him go.

Kerry Wood – For the first time ever, Yanks and Wood in the same sentence isn’t going to be a pleasant experience for male Yankee fans.

Chris Davis is so easy to strike out that pitchers should let him get a 4th or 5th strike like you’d give the small-for-his-age kid in little league.  “Good cut, Chris!”  Then the parent who needs anger management screams, “It’s on a freakin’ tee!  Hit the damn ball!”  Davis is also so easy to strike out the Rangers felt like they needed to go out and get someone who is marginally better.  Enter Jorge Cantu.  Or as I like to call him, the guy I told you to sell back at the end of April when his value was at its highest.  Cantu gets a boost in value because he’s now going to be hitting in a lineup with Giant Machine and Hulk Machine, while calling Coors South home.  I’d grab Cantu off waivers if I was hurting at my corner infidel spot.  Meanwhile, Chris Davis heads to the minors to try and reclaim that glory that had Bill James projecting him for, like, 40 homers and 10 steals.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Ian Kinsler – Back to the DL with a strained groin and could be out until the end of August.  Who had July 29th in the ‘Kinsler goes back on DL’ pool?  Kinsler’s officially dropping way down in 2011 drafts.  He might be the fourth Ranger drafted next year.  I smell a sleeper post about him from January Grey.  January Grey, “Leave me alone, I’m watching Jersey Shore.”

Brett Wallace – It’s ironic he’s only a 1st base prospect because he’s getting passed around the majors like a trollop who’s been a lot farther than 1st base.  For those keeping score, he’s gone from STL to OAK in the Matt Holliday deal, OAK to TOR for OF prospect Michael Taylor (whom Toronto got in the Halladay deal), and now from TOR to HOU for OF prospect Anthony Gose.  The book on Walllace is he’s a great hitter with a bad glove (hence the move from 3B to 1B).  Now it’s one thing when STL trades a 1B (when they have Pujols) or when Oakland trades a 1B (Billy Beane likes to keep busy) but when the Lyle Overbay-playing Blue Jays trade a 1B prospect one has to wonder.  Is something wrong here 0r is the Jays GM, Alex the Greek just opa’ing prospects into the fireplace?  Either way, Lance Berkman looks like he’s about to embark on the Casino Bus.  If Wallace gets called up, he’s immediately mixed league material.  He hit 18 homers in 385 minor league ABs this year.  Though it was in the PCL.  BTW, this is the longest blurb ever for a roundup.  I don’t even remember who I was talking about.  Oh, Brett Wallace!  Yeah, he can hit, grab him now in NL-Only leagues, deep mixed leagues and keepers, just in case he’s called up.

Matt Capps – Traded to the Twins for Wilson Ramos, a top catching prospect, and Joe Testa, who throws straight gas, but is still very young.  Look at the Nats making moves!  Too bad Bowden wasn’t still around, he would’ve never stood for that.  As much as I’d prefer to talk about how the Nats can be a serious contender in two years, this is after all a fantasy blog.  If you’re really desperate for saves, I’d hold Rauch just in case he sees some chances or if you need rebounds (he’s tall!), but the Minnesota papers are reporting Capps will close.  I tend to believe the Minnesotans, salt of the earth people yadda².  Also, if Capps doesn’t close, then it looks even worse that the Twins traded those prospects away.  Gotta keep up appearances, ya know?

Miguel Tejada – Traded to the Padres to play….where?  He could play shortstop with the range of Cal Ripken but that dude’s 50 years old.  He could play 3B and move Headley back to the OF, but is Tejada really a better bat than the Padres worst corner OF?  Maybe, and that’s just sad.

Josh Bell – Will replace Tejada at 3rd base for the Suckie O’s.  Bell’s AL-Only ownable, which is saying very little since Daric Barton is AL-Only material.  Bell needs to get hot before picking up in mixed leagues, or, if you speak street, he needs to be fire on Crunk Juice.

Michael Wuertz – Now Bailey’s headed to the DL.  Wuertz has shown himself to be pretty adept at blowing save opportunities, so he’s no sure thing, but Breslow is?  As German prostitutes like to say, I grabbed Wuertz.  (BTW, whenever I think of a German prostitute, I picture a woman that could have easily been a female wrestler if she just got a few breaks.)

Neil Walker – 1-for-4 with his 5th homer and 2nd in three games.  I’ve knocked him a bunch, but when you’re looking at a Pu-Pu Platter of middle infielders, Walker’s at least hitting.

Matt Diaz – First time I was able to get Diaz into my lineup because it was a short schedule day and he homered.  That’s how you roll the Dye-as!

Miguel Montero – 4 for his last 8 with a homer yesterday.  Instead of just letting their catcher scabs be, I’ve noticed people are dropping Montero.  He could have a solid final two months.

Ian Desmond – 2-for-3 with his 7th homer.  Please make note of this next year when you’re drafting.  A 10/10 guy looks good when you’re drafting him, but when you’re actually waiting for him to get to 10/10 it’s mind numbingly boring.

Scott Olsen – 6 IP, 2 ER, 7 baserunners, 1 K.  He’ll be in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell.  And that’s a promise or my name isn’t Grey “El Toro” Albright.

Drew Storen – Clippard’s been a hot mess for a while now, so I’d grab Storen for saves.  If you’re really hurting for saves, I’d grab Clippard too.  If you’re really, really hurting for saves, I’d grab Sean Burnett. (And I did grab Clippard and Burnett in some leagues — My name is Grey “El Toro” Albright and I am a save vulture.  Please forgive me if I have told you to pick up a guy that has shat on your ratios.  I am powerless to my vulturing.  Anyone got some coffee and cigarettes?)

Ramon Castro – Hit 2 homers yesterday.  Appropriate of nothing, doesn’t his goatee look like a sideways yin and yang symbol?  Maybe it’s me.

Carlos Quentin – 2-for-4 with his 20th home run.  Sweet, now stay healthy for two months and hit.

Raul Ibanez – Hit his 2nd homer in the last week and he just missed his third with a WTF (Warning Track Fly).  Also, hitting near .450 in the last week.

David Price – 6 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 9 Ks as he recorded his 14th win.  That sound you hear is the BBWAA preparing their AL Cy Young vote for Price.  Voter, “A team win is the most important thing.  And if a guy pitches with moxie.  That’s important too.”

Anibal Sanchez – 9 IP, 0 ER, 2 baserunners (1 Hit), 8 Ks.  And he’s got a no-hitter on his resume too from 2006.  Pretty impressive given his career WHIP is 1.45.  Kind of feast or famine – fitting for a guy whose name anagrams to He’s Za Cannibal.

I’m bitter.  I dropped Brennan Boesch in one league on Wednesday night for Russell Branyan.  Branyan DNP yesterday.  Boesch hit a homer off CC.  All my ex-classmates at the College of Fantasy Baseball at Charleston are going get on my case.  That’s Waiver Wire 101, man!  I’m chagrined. The problem is someone like Branyan will continue to play after Carlos Guillen comes back.  For one, they don’t play on the same team.  I can’t say the same about Boesch.  I mean, I can, but it would be a lie.  Boesch can hit; I like the little meister.  If Guillen has a setback, I’ll want to own Boesch from H-to-T.  Or if the Tigers make Guillen the backup, I’m all in on Boesch, but I’m going on the assumption that he won’t have everyday playing time when Guillen returns.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Justin Verlander – 6 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 4 Ks.  Imagine if he ever got his April act together.  But then maybe his September pitching would be a holy eff bomb.  Not sure.  Something to think about while your significant other is talking about their day.

Scott Sizemore – 0-for-3, Lost in the haze of Gordon Beckham’s awfulness is this guy.  Who knew a meth’d out Tom Sizemore would be the most reliable Sizemore this year?

Felix Hernandez – 7 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 7 Ks as he got Greinke’d.  The next sentence will be typed with my tears.  I can’t buy a Win.

Michael Saunders – 2-for-4 with a home run.  He’ll be in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell.  Now go to the Razzball homepage and don’t blink for five hours.

Chone Figgins – 0-for-3, batting .185 on the year.  The good news is it’ll be easy to go back to hating this schmohawk next year.

Zack Greinke – 6 IP, 3 ER, 10 baserunners, 8 Ks as he finally got his first win.  Just like the Royals to fire their manager after a Win.  How dare you raise our fan’s expectations!

Alfredo Simon – Recorded his 5th save yesterday.  Now has more saves than Broxton.  Zoinks!

Corey Patterson – 2-for-4 with a homer from the leadoff spot.  He was hitting in the minors when he was called up and he’s capable of getting hot for a week or two at a time.  In the big picture, Patterson is not a good hitter, so if you want in, you get in now.  You’ll need to get out soon though.  To put it in New Jersey terms, you pass through Patterson, you don’t stay there.

Ryan Zimmerman – 3-for-5, 6 RBIs and 2 homers.  Now has 8 homers in only 27 games since he missed just over a week with injuries.  “If he stays healthy, he appears to be headed for a huge season,” Mr. Obvious says.

Jhoulys Chacin – 5 IP, 6 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks.  I blame the weather.  No, I blame Coors.  No, I blame Ryan Zimmerman.  Actually, I blame Chacin and the fact he’s a rookie.  Inconsistency is to be expected when you play with rookie fire.  And Jhoulys is Aztec for fire.  No, that’s not true.  I don’t know what a Jhoulys is.  Could mean pants.

Huston Street – Supposed to be a week away from returning, but Huston Street is paved with a lot of injury setbacks, so keep your excitement in check.

Hank Blalock – Scott Boras is telling anyone that will listen that Blalock can still play in the majors and he wants in now.  Though, it’s probably Boras’s assistant; can’t imagine S.B. has time to worry about Blalock.  Put Teixeira on hold, Blalock is on the line!  Riiiiight.  Blalock did hit last year and should be capable of producing in the majors, but he needs an everyday job.  I’m not adding him anywhere.  If you’re in a very deep league, I could see it.  Like an 18 team league that only uses Scott Boras clients.

Bud Norris – 8 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks.  Wait, was he pitching against the Astros?  Norris has upside, but he’s far too inconsistent to trust in mixed leagues at this point.

Hunter Pence – 1-for-4, as he hit his 5th homer and his third in four games. Your time to buy low is 4 PM, three days ago.

Jorge Cantu – 0-for-4 as he bats .146 in May.  Member when I told you to sell him at the end of April?  Member all of the people who commented that Cantu can keep this up?  Wha’ happened?

Jake Fox – 3-for-5 as he got his 2nd straight start after only getting one start in the previous two weeks.  I realize Landon Powell is awesome and all on the Real World/Road Rules Challenge and Josh Donaldson is related to Colby, but can’t someone figure out how to play Jake Fox every day?  He has catcher eligibility!

Mat Latos – 9 IP, 1 hit, zero walks, 6 Ks.  The only player to get a hit was Eli Whiteside, who I would think looks like Hyman Roth if I didn’t know any better.  The good news on Latos, he’s cut his walks dramatically so far this year, which was a bugaboo last year.  It’still early, but he has a 0.97 WHIP on the year.  A very nice sign.  BTW, the “s” I saved in “It’still,” I’m passing that on to you.  You’re welcome.

Jonathan Sanchez – 8 IP, 1 ER, 4 baserunners, 5 Ks and now has a 2.66 ERA and 1.07 WHIP on the year.  I’d be thrilled if he stays on this course all year.  Okay, a Win would be nice, but if I wanted Wins I’d own Tyler Clippard.

Mark DeRosa – Could be headed to the DL.  If it happens, John Bowker will get his third chance to fail in three years.  If only the very forgiving Giants had Jake Fox…

Brad Lidge – The MRI showed no problems with his right elbow.  After the test, Lidge said he felt so good he could go for another three MRIs.