We continue our 2012 fantasy baseball rankings with the top 20 2nd basemen for 2012 fantasy baseball. There’s no 2nd baseman in the top 10 for 2012 fantasy baseball. At least by my calculation. Some ‘perts are putting Cano in the top 10, but I see him just outside of the top 10, but then again 2nd base is packed to the rafters with production. It looks deeper than the 1st basemen pool and I’m only being half-facetious. It’s like all 2nd basemen slept at a Holiday Inn last night. There’s 15 guys I would take and if I had a middle infield spot on my roster, I’d definitely look to put a 2nd baseman in there. As with the previous ranking lists, tiers and my projections are noted. Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2012 fantasy baseball:
1. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Turns out Leo Nunez isn’t exactly who he said he was. He’s been playing under an assumed name. His real name is Juan Carlos Oviedo, he’s a Latin 29 and he’s pen pals with Keyser Söze. He enjoys snorkeling through Atlantis, talking to his giant rabbit Harvey and hunting Sasquatch. With the Marlins’ discovery of Leo the Lyin’, he was put on the restricted list. One time I was put on a restricted list at a nightclub because I had a few too many tequila shots, danced with someone’s girlfriend, who I shouldn’t have, and bam! Please, blog, may I have some more?
Every day that Justin Verlander starts, you know there’s a chance of a no-hitter. You just expect it to be thrown by him and not another pitcher. Guillermo Moscoso took a no-hitter into the 8th inning against the Royals and finished with 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 4 Ks in 8 2/3 IP. He now has 8 wins in 18 starts which is as many wins as Brett Anderson, Dallas Braden, and Rich Harden managed this year combined. Everything about Moscoso’s year screams fluke. His 3.63 ERA / 1.14 WHIP does not gel with 5 K/9 and 3 BB/9. But as an owner of this guy in my AL-only league, all I can say is this guy has been money against bad to average teams. He’s had 4 ugly starts – @BOS, @TAM, @DET, and home against TAM. His home WHIP is now under 1.00 in over 60 innings. His road WHIP is 1.44. There’s not much time left this season but if he has a start against a bad-to-average team at home – I’d go-go for Moscoso. Please, blog, may I have some more?
You know what they call three 4-baggers in New York? An A-Rod post-game party. It’s a good thing Clorox is headquartered in Oakland because Billy Beane is going to want to rinse his eyes with bleach after this game. Russell Martin went 5-for-5, 3 runs, 6 RBIs and 2 homers (one grand slam), Grandy hit a grannie going 2-for-4, 4 runs, 5 RBIs and Cano added in one of his own with 5 RBIs. A video of this game should be shown next time the issue of a salary cap comes up at the Winter Meetings. Russell Martin has 17 homers on the year. Even if all of them were Pesci Pole assisted, it would still be a solid year. Then throw in 8 steals and decent runs and RBIs, and it’s no wonder Alyssa Milano fields his fly balls. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jim Thome – Luckily, he got to enjoy his 600th home run on the Twins. What an event! Was like Geraldo Rivera finding a second bottle of whiskey. Thome continues his ride on the casino bus to the Indians. How appropriate. To continue the gambling comparison, right now the Indians are like the guy at the ATM taking out money he doesn’t have to double down on the Pass Line at a cold craps table. Hey, Indians, it was a good run, but you’re throwing good money after bad. Go grab a $9.99 steak dinner and bark obscenities at tourists. You’re not making the playoffs anymore. Thome’s not changing that. As for fantasy, Thome gives the occasional homer, not much else. Um, okay. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Replacing Phil Coke in the Tigers rotation is Charlie Furbush. It’s about time that Leyland gave Furbush a mustache ride. Furbush also sounds like a character description for someone in a Woodstock documentary. Or a character name in a 70′s porn flick made by Leyland called, “The Marlboro Mandingo.” That was co-starring Virginia Slim. Furbush looked great in the minors, posting a solid K-rate while keeping his walks in line. He is not a 2-something ERA pitcher as he’s shown so far this year. He’s leaving 93% of men on base, that won’t continue. He can give you around a 7 K-rate with a 3.75 to 4.00 ERA. I’d grab Furbush in H2H mixed leagues for matchups and in AL-Only leagues. In roto mixed leagues, you can grab him in certain circumstances, but caveat emptor for our Latin readers. (BTW, To all the Googlers who searched for Furbush and weren’t looking for a fantasy baseball site — howdy!) Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Cole Hamels – Hit on his hand by a comebacker, but x-rays came back negative. Speaking of negatives that are positive, yesterday frequent commenter DHill Dragons pointed out the Phillies starting staff in June had a 1.96 ERA. A Philly quartet hasn’t been this hot since Boys II Men. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Recently, I had the pleasure of doing karaoke with Johnny Cueto. He decided to go with Landslide by Fleetwood Mac. Here’s what he sang, “I took my ERA and I took it down…. I climbed a mountain and I turned around… And I saw my xFIP in the snow covered hills… Well, I’ve been afraid of changing… ‘Cause I’ve kicked the life out of Jason LaRue… Awh, take this ERA, and TAKE IT DOWN!…” Then I joined him on stage for Islands in the Stream. Cueto was pitch perfect with Stevie Nicks even if he did skip lines here and there to keep it related to fantasy baseball. Right now, his ERA is 1.63. Oh, c’mon. Seriously, come on. Come on, come on, come on Chameleon! His xFIP is 3.52. His K-rate is 6.23 which isn’t good and below previous season marks. He’s leaving 83% men on and has a .216 BABIP. There’s not one category he’s excelling in right now except ERA. The mouth on the left side says, “S.” The mouth on the right side says, “ell.” Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Jonathan Broxton – ‘So much junk, so much junk inside that trunk’ could be lyrics about the Dodgers bullpen or specifically about Broxton. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Jair Jurrjens has a xFIP of 3.64 and a K-rate of 5.23. Sounds like you should brave the trade winds with Jar-Jar. Or maybe I should say, “Wash that Jurrjens right outta your Jair!” Okay, breathe, Grey, you got puns, I get it. Please, blog, may I have some more?
I’ve given much love to Desmond Jennings already on this blog, and since what I’ve previously wrote still works, indulge me for a second, “Desmond’s time is nigh, a word that only sounds negative. DJ is currently on the ones and twos for top ranked MLB prospects. He’s ranked number one for me. Numero uno. The Big Mahoff. Dora the Explorer, Boots the Monkey and Swiper the Fox all wrapped in one! (What, not street enough?) If he reaches the top end of his ceiling, you’re looking at Carl Crawford. More likely, you’re going to open up this Crackerjack and get half a Carl Crawford. Say a Carlford. You ain’t got the Craw yet, kid!” And that’s me quoting me! In 2010, he swiped 37 bags with a .362 OBP in Triple-A. In only 57 games in Triple-A this year, 9 homers and 10 steals. Somebody gag Sam Fuld, put a gorilla suit on him and send him to Africa. We want Jennings. *fast-herpes-medication-side-effect-voice* Fuld should be benched any day now for Jennings’ call-up. Or in the next week or so. It’s worth the flyer for upside. If conditions persist for longer than 48 hours, call your doctor. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Dee Gordon – Gordon is so fast he just ran into Kitchen Stadium, spit on Michael Symon’s head, buffed it and ran out without Alton even noticing. I see no reason why you shouldn’t own Gordon everywhere for a few weeks to see if he not only sticks but steals some bases. For more on my Dee Gordon fantasy, see that link. I wrote it while picking out all the strawberry Dippin’ Dots from the Banana Split mix. Please, blog, may I have some more?
News comes that Dustin Pedroia might need surgery on his knee that could sideline him for at least a month. Knee surgery sounds like something that sidelines people for multiple months, even Sparky Anklebiters. Though sometimes Sparky Anklebiters can get so amped with leave-it-all-on-the-fieldness that they lose sight of the big picture and rush back too soon. You know, they try to chew through the cone around their head and don’t heal properly. We know you’re scrappy, Dustin, stop biting on your paw! If he rushes and comes back in July, then he could miss a few more weeks with a setback. Basically, what I’m saying is, you want him to just get sidelined for two months and come back healthy in August. It’s not like what he was giving you now can’t be replaced. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Anthony Rizzo – The San Diego Padres have something to be excited about. No, Tony Gwynn didn’t announce he’s becoming a competitive eater. No, they didn’t put a giant afro on the Western Metal Supply Co. Please, blog, may I have some more?
I read yesterday Brett Anderson might be headed for TJ surgery, which I believe is surgery done while a stray dog limps through the operating room… Wait, Googling TJ surgery. Oh, it’s Tommy John surgery, not Tijuana surgery. Silly me. “No, I don’t want any chiclets, I’m having a tumor removed!” That’s someone in Tijuana having surgery. Something’s wrong with Anderson, Tommy John surgery or not. He’s making a nice run to be included in the definition for Bennis Carpensheeter. I just have to add an ‘r’ and it’s Brennis; you follow, Anderson. I’m sure that’s his main concern. “You know, my career was going fine until I was included in the Razzball glossary.” That’s Brett Anderson talking to Bryant Gumbel’s head in a jar of formaldehyde on Real Sports in 40 years. I wouldn’t drop Anderson yet, but I get the sense it’s not too far away. Doesn’t anyone stay in one place anymore? Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jemile Weeks – A’s are calling up their 2nd base prospect. Jemile, schlimazel… Hasenpfeffer Incorporated! Please, blog, may I have some more?