The title was part of a special Simpsons that Kim Jong Il commissioned where Ralph Wiggum’s mouth is jammed shut full of Korean bean paste.  Stupid American!  Last year in 317 ABs, Shin-Soo Choo had 14 HRs and 4 steals while batting .309.  Though, as I used to say to one ex-girlfriend, “Beware the small sample size.” Hmm… Maybe that’s oversharing.  Choo’s last two months were a bit-torrent, to incorrectly use the slang of the kids.  If you were to project Choo’s last year stats out over a full season with a full-time job, you get the wrong idea.  He’s not a 25+ home run guy.  The good thing (as of right now), he does have the full time job.  In 2009, we should expect Shin-Soo Choo to have less power than he showed, but more speed.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Coming to the Braves outfield this summer, Jordan Schafer — The outfielder to have when you’re drafting more than one.  I picked him up immediately in my sucky fantasy baseball league.  He sounds blahtastic! Maybe 10/15/.250 aka every outfielder that sits on waivers all year that has one good game and you contemplate picking up until you think better of it.  Some have compared Schafer to Sizemore, but he’s much greener.  Though he does know his way around striking out.  He’s jumping straight from Double-A where he K’d 88 times in 297 ABs.  CHONE and ZiPS project averages near .240.  He may turn into a Sizemore, but for 2009 he’s more of a Sighsmore <– pun!  He’s worth a flier in an NL-Only league.  But then again, so is Cha-Seung Baek.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in spring training for fantasy baseball:

Dexter Fowler – Razzball was abuzz yesterday with the news Fowler might make the team.  He really should, and Helton should retire so Ian Stewart can play, but whatever.  Fowler is the total package like Lex Luger.  He can run, mash and had the opportunity to go to Harvard.  He could go 12/30 and hit .285.  Then he’s a 30/30 guy in a year or two.  Keeper leagues should be all over him.  I have Spilborghs on a few teams, but I’d happily move on from him to see Fowler get the chance.  I grabbed Fowler in my Spilborghs leagues for backup until this shakes out.  I’ll drop whoever doesn’t get the job.  Fowler or Maybin?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

After the top 20 outfielders for 2009 fantasy baseball, there’s so many more outfielders to rank I need to turn this sucka to 40.  This is after already going over all of our other 2009 fantasy baseball rankings.  Since this is such a deep position, this list of 2009 outfielders could go to 60.  Crazy, right?  That’s not crazy as in crazy, but crazy as in, “Huh.  Um.  Okay.”  When I’m done with all of the top 20 and top 40 lists, I’m going to do a top 100 and top 300 overall.  That’s right, ya’ll; wonderful just gave birth to awesome.  Now before we get into our top 40 outfielder list, here’s our 2009 Fantasy Baseball Player Rater and our list of all the players with multiple position eligibility.  Anyway, here’s the top 40 outfielders for 2009 fantasy baseball:

21.

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This is the second morning I’ve woken up to a boxscore and I’m pissed off. This has nothing to do with fantasy baseball, and everything to do with baseball baseball. I like to watch the games. The first games were 3amPST (my time).

Please, blog, may I have some more?