So, how’s everyone holding up without fantasy baseball every day? I don’t know what to do with myself! This weekend I wandered into a Starbucks and told the coffeerista about Giancarlo Stanton for 2013. Then I laughed hysterically for a good twenty minutes until someone asked me to leave.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yesterday, Hector Santiago went 7 IP, 0 ER, 1 hit, 1 walk, 10 Ks. Hey, it’s the White Sox closer from 6 months ago, with that gig lasting for a minute. Not an Urbandictionary minute, which is a long time. An actual minute.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Poor Tyler Clippard. It seems everyone wants Drew Storen to be the closer in Washington, Clip is merely a place filler who’s done so well in Storen’s absence (3.22 ERA, 32 SVs) that they didn’t have the heart to take it from him.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Whoever foresaw me touting Logan Forsythe as a lead Buy is either a liar or a psychic. In some circles those two are the same thing. Grandstanding like Al Pacino, “Not this circle…Hoo-ah!” Though on a completely serious tip, why are psychic stores ever empty of customers?Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Phils promoted power-hitting prospect, Darin Ruf, who hit a minor league-leading 38 homers (with 20 of them coming in August). That was at Double-A and he’s 26 years old. In scout speak, that’s not good. Scouts speak in short sentences so they don’t miss the Early Bird Specials.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Pirates and Cardinals played a marathon game yesterday. 19 innings that saw 47 lineup changes, 16 different pitchers and 12,000 fans at Busch Stadium leaving simply because the beer cutoff was in the 7th inning. ”This is baseball sober? Damn, I’d prefer a third divorce.” Tim Kurkjian’s voice is cracking at the sheer craziness of the game. Can you believe this game, fellas?!Please, blog, may I have some more?
Feeling extremely sick today. Should I call Grey and tell him I just can’t complete the task at hand? Should I tell him I’m worried the medication will lead to a sloppy, uninteresting post? How could I ever in all my wildest dreams hope of topping last week’s Naked Gun post, especially caught in this horrible sickness.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Texas finally caught a glimpse of MLB’s best Japanese starter as Hiroki Kuroda went 9 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 5 Ks vs. the Rangers. Did they play this game in the Old Yankee Stadium? The one that was 700 feet to center and had Red Ruffing’s mausoleum in dead left?Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Brewers called up shortstop, Jean Segura. Woohoo! Now, on various teams, I have Domonic Brown, Mike Olt, Straily, Starling Marte, Brett Jackson, Josh Vitters and some serious Short Eyes. I’m basically the creepy guy hanging around the playground in my Astrovan, blasting “Hey Nineteen” wearing candy jewelry like I’m Mr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Don’t you love when New Yorkers say the expression, “I got your _____ right here!” Coming out of the right taxi driver’s mouth, it’s like a cello being played by Yo-Yo Ma. Sometimes it can get confusing when you are actually trying to tell someone you’ve located something.Please, blog, may I have some more?