There have been some Hall of Fame names over the course of baseball’s colorful 2000 year history. C’mon, Guru, baseball’s not that old! Whaddya mean disembodied voice of Razzball Nation that sounds slightly like my ex-girlfriend Brenda? Why do you think the Roman’s called Caligula “Little Boots?” The dude couldn’t field, booted everything. Then he married his sister Helen Mirren. Thanks, Wikipedia (and Bob Guccione). We’re not talking names like the Babe or Dizzy here, I’m talking Pickles Dillhoefer, Johnny “Ugly” Dickshot and Heinie Groh. And whatever happened to Hall of Namer Rusty Kuntz - and where can I get his throwback? One player making a name for himself these days (and making us some DraftKings cash) is Scooter Gennett. The Brewers second baseman has been rolling lately hitting .376 over the last 30 days and has more runs scored than every other second baseman not named Anthony Rendon. Sure the Scooter is no Wonderful Terrific Monds III, but he deserves a spot in the Hall of Names and more importantly a spot in this weeks edition of Jam It or Cram It.

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I wrote a letter to Dayan Viciedo the other day and promised to sing about him. After hearing this rhyme, I knew I had to take it for me. I couldn’t think of a better way to explain my infatuation because there is life and there is Dayan, at least for this week. Here’s what I’m singing to him:

I’m like Tre, that’s Cuba Gooding
I know I’m good at
Dayan of thirst
Dayan of thirst
Dayan of thirst

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Or is it Jean a buy quoi? Voulez-vous coucher avec moi Segura? Mmm hmmm gotcha gotcha Segura da da? A little help! I’m stuck in a Moulin Rouge-inspired snow globe and I can’t get out! For those of you that don’t speak French, but do speak fourteen-year-old text: Jean Seg-U-R-A Buy! Jean Segura has done a lot of bleh with a side of roasted yawnuts. “I see you sitting there on my team and I wonder if I wouldn’t be better with Asdrubal, at least his name makes me giggle,” that’s you wearing a beret, listening to jazz. I hear ya on Segura; he’s been a bore to own. The good news (if you don’t own him) is he has been a bore to own, so you could acquire him for next to nothing. Right now, he’s on pace for 8 HRs, 30 steals and a .260 average with 74 runs and 49 RBIs. Last year, when he broke out, he had 12 steals and 44 steals and a .294 average with 74 runs and 49 RBIs. So, he’s off on average and steals, the rest is negligible. Well, I’d go as far as to say it’s all a negligible difference. If he were to hit for a better average by getting maybe three extra hits a week, wouldn’t his steals go up and his counting stats? Rhetorical! So, is he capable of a better average? Certainly. Or sointly, if you’re reading this in a Curly voice. He’s fast — no shock there — so a .300+ BABIP wouldn’t be a stretch, and right now it’s below .280. If his luck just neutralizes, he’ll hit for a better average. It’s not like his strikeouts have gone up — they’ve actually gone down. It’s not he’s not making solid contact — his line drive percentage has gone up too. He’s hitting more ground balls and they’re getting caught. I wouldn’t trade the farm, but I’d definitely look to see if I could acquire him. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Royals are Daddy Rich from Car Wash or Max Scherzer owed Verlander a favor. “Hey, Scherzer, do me a solid and do a solid on the mound so my Monday start doesn’t look so bad. You feel me? If you do, I got a Ms. Upton to feel you.” Little did Scherzer know that Verlander wasn’t talking about Kate Upton, but about Justin and B.J.’s sister, Misshapen. “Misshapen, your legs are so curvaceous they remind me of the coastline of Africa.” Or maybe Verlander is just spreading something around the clubhouse. Anibal, you better not touch him or I will know it! Scherzer only lost once all of last year at home, which is slightly misleading like I’m saying he is that much better at home. He only lost twice on the road last year and his ERA on the road was almost a run and half lower. Yesterday, it all went to pot — Lincecum, “That’s where I want to go!” — as Scherzer gave up 10 runs in four innings. Leyland was right. Pitchers are like barbecuing pork. You need a lot of indirect smoke to tender up their shoulder and get ‘em right. If this allows a buying opportunity on Scherzer, unlike Verlander, I do think this was a hiccup rather than a long, extended burp. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I love when I tell you to pick up a player and he comes up days later. It makes me smile, and not one of those weird Japanese emoji smiles, but a full-faced grin. So, Andrew Heaney, you’re already okay in my book, even if that book is called, “Rookie Pitchers Will Fill You With Enthusiasm Until They Actually Pitch For Your Fantasy Team.” If you missed my Andrew Heaney fantasy with Friday’s Buy, where were you? Playing Patty Cake without your hands on the dance floor to Jason Derulo’s Wiggle song? Good story, brah. You should turn that into a novella. I’m giggling with excitement for Heaney like I’m Lisa Simpson, only instead of hehe I’m going HeHeaney. Pitching his home games in Crayola Canyon won’t hurt him, and the NL East is filled with a bunch of sad, sad hitting teams. Didja know the Marlins are the best NL East hitting team, and it’s not close? Fact! The Braves, Phillies, Nats and Mets could hold a two week round robin tournament and score less runs than goals scored in the World Cup. I went over the dangers of rookie pitchers in my Friday Buy, and what Heaney’s been doing this year in the minors. It’s all there. I will say now he should be owned in every league and is capable of winning the NL Rookie of the Year in only a little over a half a season. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

On Razzball Radio last week, where you finally got to see my perfectly circumferenced face, that looks like almost any chubby latino catcher that you can think of (to name a couple: Ramon Castro, Josmil Pinto), I got into my win-now approach. I traded high impact prospects (Gregory Polanco and Anthony Rendon) for a more immediate influence, (Robinson Cano).

I often wind up with no top prospects by year’s end, but still wind up with a sundry of “B” prospects that turn into more i.e. Mookie Betts and Joc Pederson last year for nothing! It’s about this time of the year that I start delving into C prospects in dynasty leagues for warm bodies to displace my empty prospect slots. Often, guys that come up will have initial contact problems, so I look for guys that can elevate their BABIP through both power (ISO) and speed (SPD). An extreme example is Yasiel Puig. He had contact problems last year, but he’s a monster in the power and speed departments ensuring an elevated BABIP. This year he’s put that together with a rational HR/FB ratio and a really nice contact and discipline jump. He’s elite.

It seems like I’m always seeing current and former Mets when I do this. This year is no different thanks to Andrew Brown and Eric Campbell (current Mets) as well as Nick Evans and Mike Jacobs (former) – all on this list due to their wOBA’s and ISO. While we might find more eventual, longer-term impact in AA, for this post, let’s look at the AAA minor league leaderboard (as of 5/30), including the Mexican League ranked by wOBA combined with BABIP (weighed by ISO and SPD)… just trust me:

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There’s SAGNOF – now there’s BGLIF or BABIPGLIF.

B(ABIP)GLIF = BABIP’s Got Little Face. As you delve into players for your drafts and you see a surprising glorious batting average from last year, ensure you validate it. Use Razzball Fantasy Baseball BABIP vs. Average Comparison. I’ll point out some sleepers below using this method.

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Organizational Talent Rankings via Baseball America
2013 (5) | 2012 (28) | 2011 (29) | 2010 (8) | 2009 (2)

2013 Affiliate Records
MLB:  [62-100] NL East
AAA:  [72-72] Pacific Coast League — New Orleans
AA:  [73-63] Southern League — Jacksonville
A+:  [68-69] Florida State League — Jupiter
A:  [65-72] South Atlantic League — Greensboro
A(ss):  [39-36] New York-Penn League — Batavia

Graduated Prospects
Ed Lucas (INF); Marcell Ozuna (OF); Christian Yelich (OF); Derek Dietrich (2B); Jose Fernandez (RHP); Tom Koehler (RHP); A.J. Ramos (RHP); Dan Jennings (LHP)

The Run Down
The Marlins graduated a slew of high-impact prospects in 2013, including Jose Fernandez, Christian Yelich, and Marcell Ozuna.  That sort of talent exodus will drag any system down the organizational ranks, but fortunately for Miami, this farm still features exciting fantasy potential in the form of Andrew Heaney, Colin Moran, and Jake Marisnick.  It’s probably safe to say that this system experienced the biggest drop-off from 2013 to 2014, but there’s still plenty of intrigue here.

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I told ya I’d take it deep! Wait, that doesn’t sound right…strike that, reverse it, scramble to the sidelines, get dropped before you’re out of bounds and call a time out. Yeah, yeah I mixed sports metaphors but what do you expect from the guy who also works over on the Fantasy Football side of Razzball? As my wise friend Tehol once said, just as a leopard can’t change it’s spots, a guy in a leopard thong can’t change his ways just because he’s on the fantasy baseball side of the world. So pardon me while I limber up for some lumber talk and take a little peek at a guy who was a surprise call up after Giancarlo went down last year and who did very little with his time before being sent down and finishing the year with season-ending thumb surgery…hrm, coulda sold that better, methinks. Let’s have a do-over, shall we? Here’s my excitement in doge format. Marcell Ozuna! Much excite! Many power! Such amazing! There, much better. I should work for Apple. But now that we’ve underlined and highlighted what we came to talk about, I guess we should get to it. So here’s why you should target Ozuna in your deeper leagues for the 2014 Fantasy Baseball season…

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Last week we rolled out our Top 25 Fantasy Baseball Prospects for 2014, and today we’re moving on to numbers 26-50.  Remember, this is a 2014-specific list — we’re doing our best here to identify prospects who have the best chance at contributing in the fantasy game this season.  A year ago, the second half of this same list included names like Christian Yelich, Matt Adams, Nolan Arenado, Tony Cingrani, Chris Archer, Michael Wacha, and Avisail Garcia.  I suspect that there will be a handful of impact players found in this group, as well.  Do take note.

Please, blog, may I have some more?