Jake Arrieta

Grey

Stuck In The Middlebrooks With Youk

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball | 619 Comments

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Will Middlebrooks was called up to step between his brother, Donnybrook, Bobby Valentine and Youuuuuuuuuk.  Youuuuuuuuuk said, “Ow, my back hurts, I need the DL,” Valentine said, “Just wrap yourself in lavash, that makes everything better.”  Donnybrook erupted in a public place because of needling from Sawx fans and Will Middlebrooks hits a lot of homers in the minors.  Hello, Will, you be staying for dinner?  I’ve prepared a nice spot at the corner spot.  Please disregard the Rays embossed flatware that I have there; it was for someone else.  This year in 23 games in Triple-A, Middlebrooks hit 9 homers and stole three bases.  Last year, he hit 18 in Double-A in 96 games and 7 in 17 games in the low minors.  Yesterday, he went 2-for-3 and stole a base.  He strikes out way too much currently with little to no walks for him to come close to putting up a good average over the long haul.  But long hauls are why you pay movers on Craigslist.  You’re looking at short term if you lost Longoria and, for that, I say grab him in AL-Only and deep mixed leagues.  If you’re in a league where you can grab Alvarez or Chris Davis, then I’d go with them right now.  And, no, I never thought I’d be saying that a month ago.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Josh Beckett – Beckett will only miss one start due to his lat soreness.  Lat’s all, folks.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Buystrami On Reimold

| Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell | 736 Comments

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Nolan Reimold has started this season like I thought he’d start the 2009 season.  And the 2010 season.  And the 2011 season.  See a pattern?  If not, I suggest answering C on all standardized tests and lowering your safety school expectations.  It feels like Reimold’s been sleeping on his post-hyper’dom since Branch Rickey was just a twig.  He has 25-ish homer power and 10-ish steal speed.  If he gets on one, he hits 30 homers and steals 15 and is a top 25 outfielder.  If he hits his head on his post-hyper-ness, you drop him.  In my Nolan Reimold fantasy from January, I gave him the line of 65/24/80/.250/10.  Don’t wanna trust January Grey because he’s been known to hit the bottle?  ZiPS updated their projections for Reimold to 65/22/68/.260/10.  So don’t trust me.  But you gotta trust someone in this life.  You can’t go it alone.  Cause when you let people in, the world opens up to you.  I think the preceding was a speech given by Patrick Dempsey in an 80′s movie that was followed by a slow clap.  Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:

BUY

Santiago Casilla – You know what he possibly gives you this year?  35 saves.  Know what, say, Brett Myers gives you?  25 saves.  We’re Cust kayin’ here, but Casilla should be owned.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

It’s Fraaaactured Albert

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 217 Comments

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SAT Question:  Albert Pujols is to a fractured forearm as Justin Morneau is to playing every day in 2011 and you can’t take him out of your lineup.  Only thing worse for Cardinal fans is if Don Denkinger announced Pujols’s fractured forearm while wearing a Wilson Betemit jersey.  We never get Pujols in any leagues.  I mean, never.  This year, we thought we’d go against common practice and pay for him in one league.  It’ll take away some money we have for the rest of our team, but at least we’ll have Pujols.  *standing in the pouring rain, shaking fist at the sky*  Come get some, Fantasy Overlord!  So, unfortunately, the slap on Albert’s forearm was harder than the law gave to Tony La Russa when he DUI’d and Pujols will be out for at least 6 weeks.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Hosmer’s Odyssey Might Not Be Epic This Year

| Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell | 297 Comments

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As I was sipping from my high-priced stemware that also happens to feature Star Wars characters, I got to thinking about how lucky I was to grab Eric Hosmer in one league.  I patted myself on the back and took a dive onto my water bed.  As the posturepedic waves crashed over me, I slept.  A few hours later, I woke in a panic.  Water was dripping from my forehead.  Was there a leak in my bed?  No.  I was sweating, worried I fell for the hype machine like when I bought 10 Gregg Jefferies rookie cards for the incredibly low price of $9.  (On a baseball card side note, I was one of those schmohawks thinking baseball cards are only going to appreciate in value.  They are going to be so rare!  Ooh, a Mark McGwire 1987 card!  Better hold on to that one!  Wally Joyner has some pop!  Stock up!  Randy Velarde is the next Bucky Dent!  Put that one in a sleeve!  Now you can buy 200 cards for a nickel.  Alas…)  Is Hosmer going to be great with a side order of splendiferous?  Probably, friend, assuming splendiferous is a word.  But he’s a rookie.  A 2007 Ryan Braun rookie season is crazy rare.  Most rookie seasons are pretty just a’ight.  Some solid streaks, some funky streaks where it looks like they’re playing in a burlap sack.  In ESPN, Hosmer went from 1% to over 90% owned in a week.  Since 40% of ESPN leagues are filled with abandoned owners, that tells me 130% of fantasy baseballers (<–my mom’s term) are excited about Hosmer.  That’s your chance to sell high, you savvy fantasy owner you.  Obviously, in keepers, you hold tight.  Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:

BUY

Justin Turner – I’d have no interest in him if he didn’t have 2nd base eligibility.  How’s that for a hard sell?  Or is it a hard Buy?  Or maybe it’s a soft Buy…

Elliot Johnson – He sounds like a Vice President candidate from the early 1900s.  Elliot Johnson is a firm believer in woman suffrage.   Hopefully Nucky backs him.  It feels like the middle of the Rays infield is a black hole for upside.  Hey, is that Reid Brignac floating past the Russian space station?  Way to reach your potential!  Johnson has decent speed (~25 speed potential over a full season) and some light power.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Braves Tap Julio Down At the Ballyard

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 303 Comments

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A whale of a prospect plus a bad oblique leads to a a closed Beachy.  Enter Julio Teheran.  Well, reenter Julio Teheran.   Teheranasaurus Rex!  First, let’s see what Stephen said about him, “Easily the best story of the 2010 minor league year.  Teheran throws a 92 to 96 MPH fastball, an above-average changeup, and a more consistent breaking pitch.  Teheran is considered a top 5 pitching prospect in the minors, if not top three.  Finally, I hope Grey gets his mustache caught in the gears of a car.”  Hmm… Maybe I should’ve read what he wrote before quoting him.  Anyhoo!  Don’t judge Teheran on his messy first start in the bigs.  He should be grabbed in most competitive leagues.  Should have a 7+ K/9 and a high 3 ERA with a chance for a lot more.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Chris Carpenter – 6 1/3 IP, 7 ER, 11 baserunners, 5 Ks as he was handily beat by Wood (6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks).  In honor of the Carpenter/Wood matchup, everyone in attendance received a bill for $5000 for a picket fence that wasn’t completed correctly.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

This Johnson Needs His Balls To Drop

| Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell | 385 Comments

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With 4 homers for Kelly Johnson, there’s still the Kelly Ka-POW, see?  With the 6 steals, he’s still running.  If you extrapolate those numbers out, it’s a 20/20 season.  If extrapolate is the right word.  From radio, to the video, to Arsenio… Tell me!  Yo, what’s the best case scenario for Johnson?  Last yeario, Phife Dawg.  That’s not happening this year though.  This is what currently is happening.  His balls batted into play are showing he’s been unlucky, so he’s pressing and his Ks have gone up and walks have gone down.  If a couple balls fall in front of fielders and Johnson gets on base, his confidence will rise and he’ll start being more selective at the plate.  His average will then rise and he’ll continue to hit for power and steal bases.  His average isn’t likely going to get up to .280, but a 18/15 year with a .250 average is still very possible.  That’s better than the current perception of him.  If he’s been dropped, I’d look to grab him.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Eureka! Franklin Finally Gets No R-E-S-P-E-C-T

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 305 Comments

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Ryan Franklin was replaced yesterday, but it came so begrudgingly, La Russa wouldn’t even announce who would replace him.  GM Mozeliak held a knife to a squirrel’s neck to try and get La Russa to tell us who would be the closer and still nothing.  “There’s only two things in this world I hold dear — my Mom and my word and I’m mum on both.”  That was what I imagine La Russa said.  Mitchell Boggs, CPA seems most likely to see the first chances.  Behind him, Motte, then MLB’s poet laureate, Miguel Batista.  Keep in mind, Franklin isn’t out of the picture completely either.  La Russa is way too loyal to his guys.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Skip Schumaker – Headed to the DL with a hyperextended elbow.  Somewhere, Shawn Michaels’ elbow says, “Pfft.”

Ian Stewart – Sent to Triple-A.  Pretty sad move for me to hear.  Mini-Mini Donkey was a one-time favorite.  I was thinking how this is one of those moves that if you don’t play fantasy, you’re probably like whatevs.  Deep thoughts with Grey Albright, I suppose.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Darling, You Look Narvelous

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 121 Comments

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Chris Narveson, his name makes me think of the insurance guy from Groundhog Day.  Am I right or am I right-right?  His name also would sound good recited by Chris Cornell.  Chris Narveson, won’t you come and wash away the rain?  Won’t you come.  Won’t you come.  Narveson was in my top 80 starters.  Let’s see what I said there, “Hmm… I don’t remember and I’m too lazy to click on the link to the actual blurb.  No one actually reads stuff I quote from myself so I’m gonna pretend I just explained Narveson to a T.”  And that’s me quoting me!  Yesterday, he had the line of 6 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks.  He’s also 29 years old, so I’d preach a bit of caution.  He’s good for Ks (7+ K/9), dangerous on walks and around a 4.00 ERA starter in the NL.  So that’s good, meh, serviceable.  In any league deeper than 12 team, he should be owned.  In 12 team leagues, I’d take the flyer where I had room.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Rickie Weeks – 2-for-4 with his 3rd homer in 4 games.  On one hand, I’d sell him.  On the other hand, who are you selling him for?  On my third lesser known hand, I’m wearing a puppet while talking out of the corner of my mouth.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closing Sale

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 134 Comments

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Yesterday, Ozzie Guillen said, “Bobby’s not my closer right now, he’s not, I’m very happy with Chris Sale.  I’m not saying (Jenks has) lost his job, I have to wait to see to put him in the game to see how he’s doing… It might take a little while, maybe one day, two days, three days… a week.  Unless I find out Chris Sale is Asian, then I’m gonna make him work for it.”  The last line was inferred.  Sale’s been lights out since his call up — 0.57 ERA in 15 2/3 IP with 21 Ks.  The manager says he’s the closer, so I’m gonna say Sale’s the closer.  It’s obviously not as easy as that when Ozzie’s involved.  The wind could change directions, Ozzie’s weather vane that’s labeled with Putz, Jenks, Thornton and Sale could spin and someone else could be the closer by tomorrow.  As of right now, I’d grab Sale.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jimmy Rollins – Sounds like he’s done for the regular season, or at least until very close to the end of the year.  Rollins said, “Studies show, even if it’s a mild hamstring, even though the doctors like to say 7-to-10 days, it’s usually three weeks.”  Studies, yeah.  Studies of Jimmy Rollins.

Please, blog, may I have some more?