Welcome back for another star-studded event! Assuming you hack into your favorite online dictionary and replace the definition of ‘star’ with “guy who lives in his mom’s basement and screams when someone finishes his Doritos,” and next to the definition of ‘stud’ you put a picture of yourself. The Razzballies are the only award show where it’s totally fine to show up in sweatpants and for your fingers to be orange from Cheetos. We don’t judge. We will occasionally mock. Mock-judge, tomato-tomahto. Get over it! So, without further ado (cause I have to do a doo), here’s the year-end awards for the best and worst of fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Just yesterday morning, they let me know you were gone.
Baseball, the schedule they made put an end to you.
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song,
All I was wearing was a thong.
I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain. I’ve seen sunny days when I thought the season would not end.
I’ve seen lonely times for Matt Williams, I mean, he’s a dope, but he can’t even find a friend from his own coaches.
But I always thought that I’d see Giancarlo again.
I believe they call that a prelude, but since it comes the day after the fantasy baseball season wraps up, it’s not a prelude. It’s an epitaph. Here, take a tissue. You have to excuse me, I don’t have any clean ones. What will we do for the next few months without an update on Ryan Zimmerman’s oblique? Will Pablo Sandoval’s back hurt even if we don’t talk about it? What will we do without a Hanley injury update? WHAT? WILL? WE? DO? Prepare for next season, of course. But, first, let’s bask in the last day of the season. Today is the day when you realize you’ve spent 27,000 man hours this summer beating eleven other strangers to win a virtual trophy, and it feels great! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
I love when halfway decent starting pitchers are given away for practically free on DraftKings. I especially enjoy it when it happens on a Coors field day. That of course could be read as a “Coors Field” day or as a Coors “field day”, because both are true. When you’re trying to squeeze in as much Coors exposure as you can, a 4K pitcher opens up an awful lot of options. Logan Verrett sits at $4,500 tonight and gets to square off at home against one of, if not the worst hitting team in the majors in the Atlanta Braves. Jon Niese just completely shut them down. That’s the same Niese who had given up 11 runs in his previous 8 IP mind you. The Braves have the lowest team OPS in the majors and their “lead” in the category seems to grow by the day. Verrett has been a more than capable spot starter for the Mets as they try to limit every one of their young pitcher’s innings. Tonight he fills in for deGrom and should be good to go for at least 75-80 pitches, possibly more. He only threw 63 against the Marlins over 5 IP, but the Mets let him air it out for 93 a month ago at Coors field. All he did there was hold the Rockies to 1 run in 8 IP and strikeout 8. The strikeout upside is limited with the Braves as they are pretty stingy when it comes to striking out, but posting zeros works too and a win should be easily obtained. For $4,500 you can’t get too greedy. I do imagine Verrett will be fairly highly owned at this price and Coors field on the docket so despite the low price he may be more of a cash game play than a GPP. Let’s look at some more plays for tonight’s DFS slate:
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 5 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So as the two-start pitching post comes to a close, I thought I’d take a break from our usual theme based format and make this week’s edition as straight-forward as possible. But then I wrote the first draft in Old German and realized that translating it back to English was neither simple or straight-forward. There are some terms in Old German baseball vernacular that just don’t translate. Then again most of it is comparing pitchers mechanics to field work. This all gave me a great idea for a sequel to Million Dollar Arm with John Hamm. The premise is simple, upon his return from India J.B. Bernstein is driving through Lancaster County and witnesses a 16 year old Pennsylvania Dutch lefty by the name of Ezekial Miller striking out teams of grown men from a near by town. Bernstein fresh off his cricket adventure, believes he’s found his next project and wacky hi-jinx ensues. It’s one part Kingpin, One part The Natural, and one part Hoosiers. The last part only fits because there’s a lot of veiled racism that only Disney could produce. So that’s my pitch (pun point). What do you guys think, shall I kick start a Kickstarter campaign? Let’s make this happen, I have a football team of little Lifshitz to feed, or as I call them a bunch of Lil-Shitz. You like?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Maybe because The Bastard Executioner premiered last night, but I’m feeling reminiscent for Sons of Anarchy — Jax, Clay, Peg Bundy and that Irish guy I couldn’t understand — and, specifically, to the Season 4 premiere set to Joshua James’s Coal War. In that spirit, I ain’t cuttin’ my Strasburg till the good Strasburg shows! Ain’t cuttin’ my Strasburg till the good Strasburg shows! Ain’t cuttin’ my Strasburg till the good Strasburg shows! Good Lord, when’s he gonna come! I hate to give someone a lede soon after I just gave them a lede, but Stephen Strasburg had a line of 8 IP, 0 ER, 1 Hit, 1 Walk, 14 Ks, and I need to make exceptions. As previously stated, Strasburg’s control and ERA (still at 3.98 on the year) have been all over the map like a drunk Magellan, but, as he showed yesterday, he could easily be a Cy Young candidate for 2016. I just wish he’d wait until April of next year to show it so we can draft him for cheap. Likely, most have moved on to fantasy football, so people will see a 3.90-ish ERA from him and under draft him next year. That’s when we pounce like SAMCRO near an Elvis impersonator that’s not Bobby. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Glad to see you haven’t completely moved on to fantasy football just yet. There’s still money to be had on the baseball side and as a matter of fact, there’s quite a bit. DraftKings is running a baseball version of the Millionaire Maker. To the best of my knowledge, they’ve never run one of these for MLB and I’m pretty excited to take a few whacks at it. I’ve played these for PGA and of course, NFL and playing for a shot at a million is pretty silly to think about. It’s MLB, anyone can win you that dough on a given night, so let’s see if we can dig up some gems for this evening.
J. A. Happ is the pitcher I’m going to be looking at the most when building tonight’s lineups. I can’t understand a couple things about Happ, first is his price. Happ is $7,500 tonight, cheaper than John Lamb. Happ has been on an impressive run lately, much like Josh Tomlin. Tomlin costs $3,000 more tonight and is facing the K-stingy Royals. Happ’s ERA in August was a tidy 1.98 and he’s kept that momentum rolling into September with a 1.38 ERA in 2 starts. Also included in those 7 total starts is 42 Ks and 7 BBs in 40.1 IP. The other thing I don’t quite understand is the Streamonator’s hate for Happ tonight, ranking him as the 12th best pitcher on the day. That seems criminal, much like what the SON wants to do to my kitchen appliances. Maybe DraftKings and SON know something I don’t here. The Cubs are a solid hitting team, sure, but they lead the league in strikeouts and strikeouts mean points in the daily game, so that’s a plus for Happ. The Cubs are also in the bottom 8 in team OPS vs. LHP. This makes sense as their typical 2-4 hitters (Schwarber, Coghlan and Rizzo) are all lefties. Seems like another plus for Happ. Kris Bryant you say? PNC Park is one of, if not the hardest park for RH hitters to go deep in. If that’s not enough, Happ will be pitching the second game of a double header, which means he could be facing an even shakier lineup as the studs take the night off. I don’t know about you, but I’m sold. Let’s all hope Happ is just awesome and look at a few more picks to help us win that million.
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well try out this 10 teamer of Razzball writers and friends to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. It’s how we know you care! If you still feel helpless and lonely, be sure to subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.Please, blog, may I have some more?
When I hear the name Domingo Santana, I’m immediately transported to a small village in the Catalan region of Spain. A Gregorian monk overlooks the city of Barcelona. A breeze of air rolls in. Not from the Mediterranean, but it’s that breeze of air that rolls over the city from the residents pronouncing Barcelona with a lisp. This is the Gregorian monk’s city, and his name is Domingo Santana Sr. Sr. and the year is 1789, and I feel like I just pitched a cheap wine commercial to a client at an ad agency. “The tag line is: This monk’s got spirit!” Client leaves; I’m fired. I scream, “But I’ve seen every Mad Men episode,” as the screen fades to black. So, Domingo Santana isn’t the best guy on waivers in every league. I’d likely go with Jayson Werth, Wil Myers and a bunch of other guys over Sunday Santana for this year, but some of youse are in keepers and this post can also be for 2016 fantasy baseball, because I said so. According to some Jean Smarts at other sites, Santana made contact on only around 70% of minor league pitches that were in the strike zone over the past two years. Only one other player in the minors was that bad (Rymer Liriano). To put that in perspective, Domingo can’t hit balls that are in the strike zone. So far this year in the majors, he has a 30% strikeout percentage. What do all of these numbers mean? He might hit .230 if he’s lucky. So, why am I crushing on him so hard like I’m a Swede who just found a frozen time capsule filled with Frusen Glädjé? Because Sunday Santana has 30-homer power and 15-steal speed, and kinda reminds me of a young Carlos Gomez with a bit less speed. The same CarGo that struggled until he was 26 years old, and Domingo is only 23. Will Santana ever make enough contact? It’s hard to say, and it may not come in 2016, but I’d definitely grab him for cheap in keepers for a flyer for next year, and I like him in deeper leagues right now for some occasional flashes of the power/speed combo. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
You wanna know what’s on my mind? “If the Nationals wouldn’t have shut down Stephen Strasburg three years ago, would they have been eliminated a day earlier this year?” No, that’s not on my mind. “Is there anything to your business idea of selling 500-foot rulers outside the courthouse to people who just got restraining orders?” That’s been on my mind, but that wasn’t what I was thinking about now. “What does Strasburg offer us for 2016?” Yes, that was what I was thinking. How did you read my mind? “I’m you.” Shh, you’re ruining the illusion. Yesterday, he went 7 1/3 IP, 3 ER, 6 baserunners, 13 Ks. Prettttay, pretttay good. Of course, Effin Stressbird has been an ulcer all year with his 4.30 ERA, 1.23 WHIP and continual injuries that have left him with only 98 1/3 IP. When digging deeper — and it hurts me soul, Lupe Fiasco, to say this — he doesn’t look bad. His velocity went up this year to 95.3 MPH from 94.8; his K/9 is down 10.1 to 9.7, but I think that’s just due to his control, and a 9.7 K/9 isn’t bad. He hasn’t been as sharp with command, but couldn’t that be due to the back problems he’s fighting? I hate him as much as anyone that is making hashtags by combining MLK and the dipshit in Kentucky, but if I’m looking at his stats with impartial eyes, he doesn’t look terrible for 2016. For this year, just give me three more effin starts like last night, you Effin Stressbird. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Chicago Cubs mega prospect, and super phenom Javier Baez made his second start yesterday since being called up September 1 and went 3-for-4 with a 2-run HR and 3 RBI. After debuting 0-for-4 with a strikeout on Tuesday, this was a welcome sight for Cubs fans and more importantly, fantasy baseballers like you and me. Will he play every day? I don’t know. But if he keeps going 3-for-4 and hitting dingers…yeah, he’ll probably play! Cubs fans, you so spoiled with prospects these days. Kris Bryant is basically my role model. Rizzo be the Izzo. All Kyle Schwarber does is hit home runs. Now you’ve got Baez to fawn over. We all know about Javy Baez’s power by now, but let me remind you in case you forgot. In 2013, he hit 37 homers and slugged .578 in 130 games. More recently, he slugged .526 with 13 homers and 62 RBI in 74 games in the minors this year. Last year, in just 52 games with the MLB Cubs, he hit 9 homers with 20 RBI! That’s a 30 homer hitter, folks. Sure he also batted .169 and struck out 95 times but that was last year, he was still a raw talent and not quite ready for the big show. This is 2015, a brand new year and Javier Baez is ready to shine. I’d grab him everywhere he’s available for the potential power upside. Grey told you to BUY and adds like this can win your fantasy league. It’s Javy time and this kid’s gonna be a star! Ha-cha-cha!
Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball Friday night:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Let’s start on Jose Berrios with what Prospect Mike said, “Berrios has a great starter’s arsenal with a plus fastball (sits mid-90s) and a plus curveball coupled with an above average slider and changeup. The ceiling is a #3 starter with good ratios and decent strikeout totals. Most reports rave about his maturity and ability to make adjustments, which could give him a better shot at making it in a big league rotation. Imagine a scale of good and evil with Maikel Franco on the good side and that Albright fella on the evil side, Berrios is more on the Franco side.” Why am I a part of this example? If I could quickly evaluate the Twins current crop of starters that are prospblocking Berrios: Garbage, More Garbage, Utter Garbage, Shirley Manson in Garbage, Magic Garbage. (Magic Garbage is Utah garbage where you find soiled magic underpants.) I haven’t even started talking about how Berrios was bred in a lab in Knott’s Berry Farm by founder of the boysenberry, Rudolph Boysen, whose grandchild killed his parents and is currently behind bars (true story; yes, you’re dropping the ball, Dateline, by not featuring this). The only thing that’s been stopping me from adding Berrios in every league is I have no idea when he’ll be called up. I would add him now to see if he’s called up when rosters expand on September 1st, then drop him soon after in redraft leagues if he’s not called up. Anyway, here’s some more players to Buy or Sell this week in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?