We fill out the 2011 fantasy baseball rankings with the last few hitters, the top 10 utility players for 2011 fantasy baseball.  These players are only eligible at DH aka Utility.  Frankly, I don’t think you should draft any of these designated hitters.  They don’t allow enough flexibility.  For example, what if you had Travis Hafner clogging up your Utility spot last year and you really wanted to pick up Jose Bautista?  You would’ve been wretched, retching on all fours to borrow from The Decemberists.  These guys have no position eligibility for fantasy baseball.  As with past rankings posts, this top 10 for 2011 will be broken up into tiers, and their 2011 projections will be included.  Anyway, here’s the top 10 utility players for 2011 fantasy baseball:

1.

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Cliff Lee not only signed with a team finally, he signed with the team that would give him the most value from the three rumored suitors. (BTW, Rumored Suitors would be an awesome R&B album title.  If you’re reading Jodeci, take it, it’s yours.)  Carlos Ruiz got a new battery mate and the Philly fans don’t have to throw batteries at anyone until at least 2013.  The Adverb’s return to Philly makes me think he can easily be a top ten starter in 2011.  The Mess and Gnats can’t hurt that.  Even in Citizens Flank he’s pitched, like, Excellent Lee — 2.52 ERA, 1.00 WHIP in 5 starts.  The Phillies now have the top three WHIPs for starters in the major leagues last year, with The Adverb coming in first with a 1.00.  A 1.00 WHIP in 212 1/3 IP goes a long way to helping a fantasy staff that is filled with Brain Freezes.  Wins are obviously unpredictable.  Somehow the Phillies have to lose at least 50 games.  And Lidge can only realistically be relied on for 10 of them.  For 2011, I’d give The Adverb the line of 16-6/2.95/1.05/190.  I.e., Fo’ realz?  I.e., Day-uhm.  I.e., Yup.  Anyway, here’s some more moves and what they mean for fantasy baseball:

J.J.

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Jake Westbrook had everything going against him.  No schools in his area had an athletic program.  His mother was strung out on drugs.  His father was absent from his life.  Then he met Sandra Bullock.  Wait, those aren’t my notes, that’s the back cover of The Blind Side DVD.  Yesterday, Westbrook threw 8 IP, 0 ER, 9 baserunners, 3 Ks.  Okay, in the broader sense, Westbrook is the dog’s breakfast, but you mix that with one certain pitching coach and, well… For his next trick, Dave Duncan will turn a cucumber into a pickle…mobile!  I don’t think it lasts for Westbrook, but he gets the Pirates next.  It’s September, you shouldn’t need more.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Tim Stauffer – 5 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 2 Ks.  You don’t get them wet, you don’t expose them to light, you don’t feed them after midnight and you never start a hodgepadre away from Petco.

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Yesterday, Ozzie Guillen said, “Bobby’s not my closer right now, he’s not, I’m very happy with Chris Sale.  I’m not saying (Jenks has) lost his job, I have to wait to see to put him in the game to see how he’s doing… It might take a little while, maybe one day, two days, three days… a week.  Unless I find out Chris Sale is Asian, then I’m gonna make him work for it.”  The last line was inferred.  Sale’s been lights out since his call up — 0.57 ERA in 15 2/3 IP with 21 Ks.  The manager says he’s the closer, so I’m gonna say Sale’s the closer.  It’s obviously not as easy as that when Ozzie’s involved.  The wind could change directions, Ozzie’s weather vane that’s labeled with Putz, Jenks, Thornton and Sale could spin and someone else could be the closer by tomorrow.  As of right now, I’d grab Sale.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jimmy Rollins – Sounds like he’s done for the regular season, or at least until very close to the end of the year.  Rollins said, “Studies show, even if it’s a mild hamstring, even though the doctors like to say 7-to-10 days, it’s usually three weeks.”  Studies, yeah.  Studies of Jimmy Rollins.

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Kyle Drabek, the Blue Jays top pitching prospect, was called up to start on Wednesday vs. the O’s.  Kyle Drabek is 24th on the top 50 prospects for fantasy baseball.  He has top of the rotation stuff and a good pedigree with his dad being the former Cy Young winner, Doug.  Or Guod if you’re dyslexic.  Or “Hey, look a bird,” if you have ADHD.  Well… Kyle Drabek had top of the rotation stuff.  Now he looks closer to a number 2 or 3.  His strikeout rate went from 10+ K/9 in A to 7+ in Double-A.  Word on the street is his velocity is down.  He’s obviously too young to write off.  Velocity could return with the gaudy Ks.  In keepers, I’d grab him in AL-Only, obviously.  In mixed league keepers, it needs to be deep for him to have any real value.  For this year, I’d be very cautious about starting him anywhere.  In his first two starts, he gets the M’s and O’s, or the Mo’s.  Not bad matchups, but starting rookie pitchers in the final weeks of the season is asking for trouble.  You just have no idea what he’s going to do in his cup of coffee, he may or may not get creamed.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Adam Lind – 1-for-2 with 22nd homer.  I’m sorry, I will like him again next year.  I’ll love him if he can train with the guy who trained Zobrist in the winter of 2009 and Bautista last winter.

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Hello, new readers.  No, this isn’t High Times dot com, but don’t worry there’s Doritos at the end of this post.  Hey, don’t skip ahead.  You have to read the post first.  Yes, the computer is talking to you.  Aw, I’m just messing with you.  The computer’s not talking to you.  You’re just reading, silly!  So, Bud Norris didn’t come out of nowhere to be my new Razzpick du jour.  Yesterday, he went six innings, giving up one run and K’d 4.  In the not-too-decent past, I mentioned liking his upside.  For our friends in Latin America, the caveat is his wildness.  The love comes from the fact he has more Ks than innings.  There’s only ten other starters with more than 110 innings in the major leagues that can claim that.  That’s one starter for every finger.  Unless Antonio Alfonseca is reading this.  The wildness is still there, but he hasn’t walked more than 3 batters in a game since April.  I’d absolutely grab Norris for the last month if I needed Ks (who doesn’t?) and some upside (of course you do).  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Chris Johnson – 4-for-6, 1 RBI in a 16th inning game that saw Roy Oswalt play left field and Tim Kurkjian’s voice cracking at the sheer craziness of the game.  Can you believe this game, fellas?!

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Pedro Alvarez went 3-for-5 with 2 homers.  Had his 2nd two homer game in two days.  Say that fast 117 times!  LMFAO should be playing when Alvarez goes into the batter’s box, “Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!”  (I wish I wrote that song.)  Alvarez is 23 years old.  For those who can’t read between the lines, he’s going to get better!!!  (Second and third exclamation marks were for emphasis, not because my keyboard’s keys are sticking.)  Who knew the only thing the Pirates offense needed was to lose their best hitter?  Maybe the Mariners should lock Ichiro in a closet for a few games.  This is Ichiro going into the closet, “Hey, Beltran, what are you doing here?”  I keed.  So what can we expect of Alvarez the rest of the season.  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Shot!  Or 12 homers and a terrible average.  He’s still K’ing too much.  I’d absolutely pick him up in every league just for the chance he keeps hitting bombs.  I would not drop anyone that I might regret.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Ty Wigginton – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 2nd homer in two days.  Casey McGehee’s Dad is historically a streaky hitter and a 2nd half hitter.  Also, the Phillies, Rangers and Yankees are talking about acquiring Wiggy.  Not all of those teams would be a boost to his value, but if I had to take a guess, I’d say Wigginton will be in Friday’s Buy/Sell.

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Javier Vazquez touched you in your no-no area for two months to the point where just looking at his name made you crawl up into a ball and cry, but yesterday he flirted with a no-no for seven innings.  He held the 1927 Blue Jays to only one hit, a home run by HGH Wells.  (In a strange twist, Bautista didn’t homer, but he did have sex with your wife.  Don’t shoot the messenger!)  So can Javier Vazquez now be trusted?  The better question is did anyone really think he was the 8 ERA pitcher he was showing in April and May?  Come on, this is baseball.  It’s a sport of aberrations from day-to-day and week-to-week and month-to-month, but, in the end, people find their level.  Vazquez is more or less a 4.50 ERA pitcher in the AL.  So you need some months of dreckitude surrounded by some months of usability.  Vazquez is still walking too many guys and, other than him striking out 9 Blue Kays yesterday and the Suckie-O’s the game before, his Ks have been down.  So usable, but don’t expect a full return of 2009 Vazquez.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Mike Stanton – He’s coming up on Tuesday.  Can you hear that?  It’s my heart going pitter patter.  Put your ear up to the computer monitor, you’ll hear it.

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Before we move our 2010 fantasy baseball rankings to the pitchers, we look at the top 5 utility players for 2010 fantasy baseball.  These players are only eligible at DH aka Utility.  Frankly, I don’t think you should draft any of these designated hitters.  They don’t allow enough flexibility.  For example, what if you had David Ortiz clogging up your Utility spot last year and you really wanted to pick up Ben Zobrist?  You would’ve been wretched, retching on all fours to borrow from The Decemberists.  These guys have no position eligibility for fantasy baseball.  As with past rankings posts, this top 5 for 2010 will be broken up into tiers, and their 2010 projections will be included.  Anyway, here’s the top 5 utility players for 2010 fantasy baseball:

1.

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With ace-of-the-staff years dating back to 2002, Roy Halladay was the franchise.  Well, the Blue Jays front office gave the Blue Jays fans the kanye shrug.  While most pitchers go from good to great or great to mindblowing in the NL, Halladay will have to deal with Citizens Bank.  He doesn’t have much history to go on there, but it obviously favors hitters more than Rogers Centre, where Halladay had a 3.23 career ERA.  I think we can nullify that park disadvantage with all the weaker lineups and the pitchers he’ll get to face.  In his career interleague play, he has a 17-8 record, 3.02 ERA.

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