The week leading up to the All Star break is always fun times for me — it’s when I can take my paid vacation to beautiful Bayonne, NJ. My all-inclusive cab ride includes a firsthand view of a few muggings, a stop for gas, and a flavored shaved ice from Primo, the traveling shaved ice guy. In all seriousness, this is a good time to look at your roster and actually commit to it or start pondering the fantasy football drafts. So happy 4th of July to all and I hope the fantasy gods bless you with bountiful stashes of herbs and RBI’s. (Please note that pitchers and match-ups may change)
Everett Teaford (@Tor vs Romero, @Det vs Fister) Sounds like a guy I would want selling Butterscotch Krimpets, not throwing two games in one week. I have seriously reconsidered how much I like those Krimpets now that I have written about them. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Well, here we are in week 3 already, wonder if ML bee will have another opening game just to keep it fresh. The world of two-start pitchers is in full bloom, the rotations are coming together and being set in an orderly fashion. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Mets doctors said Johan Santana would miss a start or two. That was a year ago. He’s still working his way back. The Mets doctors said Jose Reyes would miss a weekend series in 2009, he missed three months. The Mets doctors said Carlos Beltran would miss a game in 2009; it took him two years to come back. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Logan Morrison was optioned to Triple-A New Orleans. Easy to say he was demoted because of his struggles since the All-Star break, but what fun would that be? He just started to hit again — 4 for his last 11 with a homer and steal. As Fredi Gonzalez and Dan Uggla before him, Logan’s run out of town by the Han-Man. Easily having his worst season, it’s pretty incredible the nerve Hanley has putting his full 5-hour energy drink towards getting rid of Morrison. Billy the Marlin would like to demonstrate the size of Hanley’s cojones. I imagine Logan won’t be down in New Orleans longer than a couple of weeks so don’t do anything rash in deep keeper leagues. Hopefully Morrison doesn’t take a bath in that French-influenced city. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Brian Wilson – Out with a back pain. A back issue sent him to the DL in April, so if this a recurrence it could be trouble with a capital beard. Romo would be the first option out of the bullpen but he has a tender elbow — I always prefer al dente. Next up, Affeldt, who’s voiced by Gilbert Gottfried, but he’s a lefty so the Giants might just go with matchups as they did yesterday turning to Ramon Ramirez aka Ram-Ram. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The week before the MLB trade deadline is upon us. This is why we keep a few extra FAAB bucks available. Wish they were good for a happy meal, because those toys always come in handy. With about 6 weeks to the fake playoffs, there is still time to make that last move to steal a few points in categories that your team may be lacking. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Stephen Drew to postpone all ballroom dancing classes for six to nine months with a fractured ankle. His wife Nancy isn’t gonna be happy. More time for mystery solving! If you haven’t seen the video of Stephen Drew, I’d wait for it on the big screen in Faces of Death: The Drew Edition, which will also feature J.D. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yesterday was Juan Rivera’s birthday. *giggles like a schoolgirl* Wait, I wanna think about how the Blue Jays cut Juan Rivera on his birthday. *giggles again* It was his birthday! Man, that is rich. The Blue Jays should’ve had someone tell Juan a passage from Ezekiel 25:17. Not someone important just to rub it in further. Someone like the guy who cleans the jock straps. “Juan, there’s this passage I got memorized… Hold on, I have to put extra bleach on these underpants.” So in Juan Rivera’s place is Travis Snider. My love runs deep for Mr. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Sounds like Ike Davis is done for the year. He could be facing microfracture ankle surgery. Man, will the Mets ever catch a big break? First, Beltran had microfracture surgery on his knee, and now Davis. What’s with the Mets and tiny surgery? Can’t the Mets find a normal-sized doctor? Microsurgery is the 101 class if you’re going to be a surgeon. Macrosurgery is the 102 class. That’s a little known fact — literally! For fantasy purposes, just think, now you have more room on your DL. You’re welcome. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Brandon Beachy – 6 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 11 Ks. That’s one for the Brandon Beachy Memoirs. Now if only he’d stop looking up his cousin’s dress. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Can we stop talking about how running into the catcher is “not” part of baseball? It’s getting really old and stupidity is bleeding from every multimedia channel. If Matt Treanor, or Misty May for that matter, got run over and injured this would be a blip on the radar for baseball. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Week 6 is here, subtle rejoice. Some top minor league guys are getting the call, the closer situations on some teams are still an enigma wrapped in a TLR sandwich and some elite pitching has returned. Now is the time to start gambling on guys that have either underperformed or you have a hunch about. Please, blog, may I have some more?