Drafting is complete! The season has started! Hope you’re still in the running in your league. 64 leagues made 19,200 selections at the draft table in March. 456 different players were chosen, with 214 being selected in all leagues. Another 18 were drafted in 63 of the 64 leagues. 44 were taken in just 1 league. I tried to get Jaywrong to make me a GIF showing proper drafting technique, but he wouldn’t share that particular talent, so my draft recap will once again be GIF-free.

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Here’s a post that’s gonna make you wanna slap ya mama and call her Mark. The other day I told you how to draft your pitchers for 2013 fantasy baseball. I laid it out to you nice and simple (if you have a degree in “What The Hell Is Grey Talking About?” Not a PhD, mind you. Just a BS.) Today, we forget all that jabberwocky on the who-ha and get down to business old school-style (which means if you don’t comprehend, I will hit you over the head with a baseball bat signed by Joe Clark.) What I’m hoping to lay out to you is who do you draft 2nd if you’ve drafted so and so first. I think it might be helpful to go through pairings for your 5 outfielders, all your middle and corner infielders too. I’m not sure I’ll have the time or patience to do them though. We’ll see! Or not. Your choice. (Actually, my choice.) For easy reference, the royal we will be using the top 10 2013 fantasy baseball rankings, the top 20 2013 fantasy baseball rankings and the beginning of the top 100 for 2013 fantasy baseball. I’m going to assume you’re in a 12 team, 5×5, MI, CI, 5 OF, 1 Utility, 1 Catcher league, similar to our Razzball Commenter Leagues. Anyway, here’s some pairings for the first two rounds of 2013 fantasy baseball drafts:

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Yesterday, we went over the top 20 shortstops for 2013 fantasy baseball and today we (hint: it’s in the title) go over the top 20 3rd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball. We should call all the 2013 fantasy baseball rankings where in the world is Marco Scutaro and Martin Prado? Marco…Prado! It’s like the Italian guy who went to Asia and brought back knockoff designer handbags. Now, this is not that we like them, and by “we” I mean me, but due to their flexibility on the chart of 2013 fantasy baseball position eligibility, we can compare and contrast where they are to get an idea of how shallow or deep positions are. Prado was 16th for the 2nd basemen, 12th for shortstops and 19th for 3rd basemen. Then Scutaro was 21st for 2nd basemen, 22nd for shortstops and 24th here. Quickly we could surmise, shortstops are light on top, but bigger in the middle and at the end. 3rd basemen are heavy on top and in the middle while light on the end. 2nd basemen are heavy on top, but light in the middle and at the end. Or shortstops are big-booty’d women, 2nd basemen are Playmates and 3rd basemen are the zaftig, voluptuous, BBW or simply Billy Butler. So, that all sounded much better in my head. Anyway, here’s the top 20 3rd basemen for 2013 fantasy baseball:

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This is one of the hardest posts to write all year. There’s so many different ways the top 20 for 2013 fantasy baseball could go. I almost wrote a top 10 for 2013 fantasy baseball and just made the tenth ranked guy a ten way tie with these guys and washed my hands of this post entirely. Isn’t David Wright as risky as Longoria but Wright didn’t even make the top 20? Then Beltre’s low with seemingly no risk? Where’s the pitchers? Posey’s not ranked? You know the NL MVP?! What gives, GA? McCutchen was crazy high and now Kemp is crazy low! Was I taking meds when I wrote this? Was I not taking my meds?! There’s a lot of questions to be answered as we continue our 2013 fantasy baseball rankings. There are not as many guarantees as I’d like. Verlander seems more safe than any of these hitters, but you can find so much pitching later, he didn’t even make the top 20. Thankfully, as VinWins’s data about our leagues shows, a 2nd round pick that you Mr. Bungle doesn’t spell doom. Last year, a Cano second round pick was solid and you finished around sixth out of 12 teams. An Adrian Gonzalez pick, which wasn’t great, had you finishing around sixth, too. One pick does not a team make. Here’s just twenty picks you should make. Anyway, here’s the top 20 for 2013 fantasy baseball:

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We laughed, we cried, we laughed and cried about Eric Hosmer.  Take off your homemade aluminum hat that you wear so aliens can’t hear your thoughts and think back to March.  You had that argument with your mom and you ran out of the house screaming, “I wish you were Evan Longoria!”  Then when he went to the DL, you ran back into your house and screamed, “I love you Mom, can I move back into the basement?!”  Then you streamed Philip Humber for his perfect game and you thought that this was a great time to change your hummingbird tattoo to a Humberbird tattoo complete with his likeness.

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Adam Eaton went 2-for-6 with a run yesterday as the Diamondbacks called up their outfield prospect, and hit him leadoff.  The move is to fill in for Krispie, who’s out with a sore quad.  Krispie could return (he won’t go to the DL because with 40-man rosters, there’s no need to), but Eaton’s not coming up to play in one game a week.

Please, blog, may I have some more?